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The Real Housewives of Atlanta’s Kandi Burruss has found herself in a hard spot. Between the blogosphere and her mother, Kandi can’t seem to catch a break from all the disapproval surrounding her engagement to AJ Jewel. The disapproval stems from AJ being the father of 6 kids by 4 different women. Kandi’s harshest critic also happened to be her mother, who was very open about her non acceptance of AJ.
In a recent interview with ESSENCE.com, she answers some important questions- whether her mom has finally accepted AJ, If she and AJ have a future together and why she is raising three girls instead of one. She also reveals that AJ was previously married to one of the mother of his kids.
Below are some excerpts from the interview-
Throughout the show your mom has expressed her discontent with your fiancé. Does she still feel the same?
Yes, but what people don’t realize is that my mom’s [disapproval] happened before the show. When she feels strongly about something she won’t answer my calls and she gets very dry and everything. My mother has been overbearing since my brother died in a car accident in Mexico when he was 15. He told my mom he was going to Florida with a cousin and instead he was in Mexico and I don’t believe my mom has ever forgiven my cousin. Ever since that happened she became extremely over protective of me and when I got my first record deal at 16 even more so.
Speaking of which, inquiring minds want to know what exactly does AJ do for a living?
AJ over time has done a lot of things, including running this collection agency while we were together and he just recently bought into this strip club.Hold up. Did you just say you and AJ are no longer together?
(Laughs.) We’re on hiatus. He’s a great guy and he’s not the type to sit on his behind like a scrub, so it has nothing to do with that. Yes, he has a lot of children, and yes, I didn’t know about them all at first but I got over it because as long as you handle your responsibility and spend time with your children it’s not an issue for me. Another thing I want to set the record straight on is that AJ was married before. A lot of people make comments like, if he didn’t marry his other children’s mothers then why do you think he’s going to marry you.When we spoke before you expressed concern about how a separation might affect your daughter. How is she handling your break?
Things have changed because not only do I have my daughter living with me but now I am the legal guardian of AJ’s 12-year-old twin daughters because his mother felt the responsibility was too much for her right now and she couldn’t handle it anymore. He would have taken them with him, but they needed a strong female role model and wanted to stay with me. Just because AJ and I are together I have accepted them as my children the same way that my stepfather did me when I was their age and he and my mom separated. He continued do things with me as my father throughout my life.That’s quite admirable. Now that you’ve been living in front of the cameras, would you do it for a second season?: They haven’t really talked to me about it, but yes, I would. I didn’t know what to expect or how they would portray me and I think it’s pretty accurate and there are pros and cons. I take the good with the bad. My life is changing in front of millions and I’m going to continue to grow and live my life.
For more on Kandi Burruss, you can watch the “The Real Housewives of Atlanta” on Thursdays, at 10 PM ET, and visit kandiconnection.com.
” I am the legal guardian of AJ’s 12-year-old twin daughters because his mother felt the responsibility was too much for her right now and she couldn’t handle it anymore.”
So… HE’S not taking care of HIS kids. Why is his mother taking care of his kids. I am at a serious loss of words right now… Six kids by four different women screams triffling to me. I personally think he was looking for a meal ticket. I hope Khandi comes to her senses and lets this relationship go.
I second that.
I’m amazed that such a beautiful and talented woman can’t put one man behind her and find a man more on her level. By that, I mean someone career driven and a few less children.
Don’t get me wrong children are a gift from God and should be treated as so, but with so many children I would think it would be an exhausting task for a young woman raising 1 child prior.
I wish her well.
I agree. Kandi seems like a wonderful heart. I am in disbelief the mom is not in a position to take care of them and neither is he. How is that her damn problem? She has a geat heart. I would vest all my time and energy on moving forward and finding someone who can only make the family grow in spirit and everything else. I hope she takes off the blinders. Good luck Kandi. What a piece of work AJ.
Jenny, it’s AJ’s Mother who is overwhelmed and feels incompetent as the legal guardian for the twins. Also, just because the children are not in his custody doesn’t mean he doesn’t take care of them. That has nothing to do with it whatsoever. Time out weighs Money and Paper any day when it comes to Fathers and Daughters… Fathers and their Children period. As a woman who is responsible and serious about her commitment… Kandi is doing what any woman who knows what that is all about would do.
What is wrong with Kandi? I hope she gets it together soon this man and his momma is doing nothing but, using her…why in the hell can’t he take care of his own kids…Oh she really need to get out of that environment..she can help those girls but to get custody is insane!!!! wake up Kandi wake up!!!!!!!!
KANDI KANDI KANDI PLEASES RECONSIDER TAKING CARE OF ANOTHER WOMWNS CHILDREN
Kandi, sweetheart. I was in the same situation as you. My ex and I took a break from each other and his son wanted to stay with me. At first, I was all for it but after thinking about it, it wasn’t a good thing. So, as much as it hurt me, his kids are his kids and in this situation they have to go when he goes. You haven’t even been involved with him long enough to be having guardianship over his kids, what’s wrong with you!!!!???? Where are the kids mother and why were the kids with the grandmother instead of their mother or father. You shouldn’t do this to your daughter. When my mom and step-father divorced, he, like your stepdad, was still my father but sweetie he and my mom were MARRIED, not just shacking up and engaged after a couple of months. He even gave my mom money for me because he practically raised my, even before they divorced. Kandi, you owe AJ and his kids nothing!!!!!!! I know you may think you’re being mean but give them kids back so you can get on with your life. From experience, as much as you say your only doing it for the kids- your doing it to hold on to him and I believe he’s doing it to leach off of you. Baby, please find someone on your level. Atleast someone who can bring some contribution to the table besides a bunch of damn kids. Don’t you find it strange that only after a few months of dating , he lets you get GUARDIANSHIP of his kids and asks you to marry him. Already is he being mess in the game and no contribution, now he has you taken care of his damn kids…and if they’re living with you, you are taking care of them. I completely understand you may love him, but you’ve only known him for a couple of months, so in the true since of the word, you can’t be in love with him – maybe in lust, though. You have to suck it up and move on, I know you wish things could be better and there wasn’t an issue with kids, but there is. Your own daughter even said she isn’t happy. Why would you want to expose her to this kind of mess, because if she grows up and does the same thing, you’re going to be saying the exact thing your mother is saying now. Listen to your mom, she can see right through him. What is he hiding – why has he not made any attempts to communicate with your mom. Baby, if this man was truely head over heels for you, he would be kissing the feet of the women who gave you life. He knows that you aren’t sure if you can marry him because of your mom and what is he doing to help the situation. I can tell you one damn thing for sure, throwing 12yr old twins DAMN SURE didn’t help the situation. Your mother don’t want you taken care of no man and his clan. Besides, you said that you didn’t even know about all of them in the beginning – was he lying about his kids or was he being sneeky and purposely didn’t mention. Please do better for yourself and Riley. You cannot totally focus on your beautiful child while trying to take care of 6 others that aren’t even yours and h’s not even your husband.
Kandi, I whole-heartedly support you and your decision to take care of AJ’s twins!
You are a wise, beautiful and classy lady with a kind heart! Out of all the housewives, you are the most real.
Back to the children – if everyone felt that just because someone didn’t actually give birth to a child OR refuses to take care of someone elses child, realize that someone elses child, without love and care will become someone’s nightmare and trouble somewhere down the road.
I applaud her for seriously understanding the meaning of “it takes a village to raise a child”. No matter who’s child it is, we all need to be concerned! Look at the world today – EVERYBODY needs to be concerned about EVERYBODY’s child, and anything that we can do at anytime, we should be ready to step up to the plate!
We all need to ask overselves – when was the last time that we stepped up to the plate to help someone. Another thought is – in today’s time of violence and a recession – we never know whose shoes we will be in and when. Hmmm. It could be us one day needing someone to step in and help with our loved ones! Stop being judgmental and thank her for helping those twins and giving them the love and attention that all kids need.
Take care Kandi and may GOD continue to bless and watch over you and your family!
I commend her for making that decision, because now their fathers has died and those children are going to need something stable in their life. GOD BLESS HER AND THOSE CHILDREN. And to who ever that was who said Kandi was being used by his mom also, ARE YOU SERIOUS. THAT WOMAN TOOK CARE OF GRANDCHILDREN EVEN THOUGH THEY ARE NOT HERS. GET A GRIP LEARN YOUR BATTLES PEOPLE.
As far as I am concerned.I don’t see a problem with it.We are on the outside looking in people,okay the man have alot of kids so what.I mean people are faulting Kandi for taking responsibility for Aj’s twins.I applaud her because that is what a real genuine woman do.You can’t tell her to find someone else who is driven.Apparently he is doing something right she fell in love with him.So people live your life and let Kandi Burress live hers.OMG people are so judge mental! It’s funny how people have something to negative to say about other people problems but don’t deal with their own.Big props to Kandi because I would do the same thing.Kids need stability,love and security and if the biological mom not doing it then why not take the responsibility if you are able to.Real mother will understand.So the people that have something to say I’m quite sure some time in your life you dealt with a man that people have said to you,(you need to let him go) and you didn’t because you love him for whatever reason.So don’t pull the splinter out of somebody’s eyes when you have a plank in yours.1st Ladi aka Nickey from DAllas Texas is signing off.God Bless Kandi..love you girl and you keep your head up..
Ms. B:
May God Bless you! Everything works for the good of the Lord. Many times you cannot see God’s plan but be Bless Kandi! The Lord has great things in store for you and is positioning you. Continuing helping those children and lean on the Lord for strength. My prayers are with you and A.J. Family and also your family.
Kandi, My prayers to you and both families.
Keep your eye on the sparrow, your daughter ! Listen to her feelings, children speak the truth. You have a very close and loving relationship with her and she feels she can tell you anything and she does. She has told you that she didn’t all those siblings. Although she is a child, keep your eye out for any changes in her. I do commend you for loving and caring for AJ’s children. The grandmother is just that “Grandmother”. She’s done her job and it’s time for her rest and enjoy the rest of her life. They should have been with AJ.
Now that you are the only one, becareful with your daughter and for goodness sake stop runnn=ing and crying, work it out with your mother RIGHT NOW ! !@ ! If you she keeps this up, she will tear your family (household) apart. UNITY is the key. It’s not the children’s fault.
You have my heart and prayers Lovey
kandi, i know times maybe hard right now but eventually things will get better…and it does take time. Your are going above & the beyond the call of duty of being a mother, woman, & human being & i applude you for that your a wonderful person doin a wonderful thing. Not many women will stand up to take on the responability of another persons child let a lone their ex’s… shoot some women dont wanna take care of their own kids. kandi, your a beautifull, intelligent, black sister keep your head up babe my thoughts & prayers are with you both families & all his children. You arent & havent done anything wrong. LOVE YA!!!
Dear Kandi: I am very sorry for your tragic loss… You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers… God Bless, Carla Censullo
God has a way of protecting His children…God has a way of giving us signs and directions…and when we do not listen He removes those hinderances so that we can move forward positively in our lives!
I AGREE WITH T. BATTLE! THAT IS SO TRUE EVERYTHING DEFINITELY HAPPEND FOR A REASON, I’M NOT GOING TO ACT ALL EMOTIONAL LIKE I CARED TOO MUCH FOR HIM BUT I HATE WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM THE WAY THAT IT DID, SO MY HEART DEFINITELY GOES OUT TO HIS FAMILY AND KANDI…. I DON’T KNOW ABOUT EVERY ONE ELSE BUT KANDI’S MOM AND EVERYONE ELSE COULDN’T BE MORE WRONG ABOUT AJ, BUT GOD WAS 100% CORRECT ABOUT AJ.
My heart goes out to both Kandi’s and A.J’s Family. I am about to be so real with you I just did the same thing, I took in my boyfriends kids and he later passed on and Kandi I know you want to help I know this will be hard to overcome come but for you and your daughter’s sake return the kids to the grandmother, it is very hard to raise to teenagers in mourning they need familiarity, they need there mom. MAY PEACE BE WITH YOU KANDI YOU R A GREAT WOMEN !!!!!!!!
JoJo sory but how could you think she should give the kids back to the grandma when the resonsibility is too big for her?? No hELL NO THESE KIDS ARE RIGHT WHERE THEY NEED TO BE. If she was to do that these kids will feel like dont nobody want hem. and its hard growing up and going through puberty alone man,Shes strong for taking them in all glory to her. Thats not for nobody to judge god got that. And as far as aj passing kandi and family of aj im praying for yall! and keep praising the lord at all times hes able to work it all out girl love ya!! and continue your wonders mama!!
tbattle thats amazing girl and he know he work in mysterious ways dont he!! hahahaha
my god my god my god thats why we should be living how god want us to thats saved santified and fill with his spirit people jus dont know what to say so heartless this is a sad time for aj’s family and hers the bible says u live by the sword u die by the sword, honey god allow things to happen not traigic for love she really loved him and i think he loved her who wouldnt such a beautiful woman, i love you kandi god cont… to bless and give you all the strength you need, the love your mom has for you she will comfort you but god will be a comforter to you and her she will hold you up with her motherly human strength keep crying one day you will cry nomore i still cry i lost my sister jan 2006 and my best friend july 2006 im 43yrs. i still cry but not as much god has comfort me in my time of greef.
Kandi, may God bless you, your family and A.J. family. I commend you on doing what you thought was right. Only God knows the reason behind all that’s happened. “All things work together for the good of them who love God and are called according to His purpose.” God has a purpose for your life. So no matter how many blogs you read, seek God and all His righteousness. Pray and talk to Him and ask what His will is for you. The safest place to be is in the will of God. He will give you the answer through His Word and confirmation. He will also give you comfort.
My heart is reaching out to you,
For what you’re going through;
I’m thinking of you frequently
And praying for you, too
Keep your head up girl but please re think taking care of the children.
I completely understand her decision to raise the kids. i would do the same. You see that these kids need someone, and obviously they got nobody, my heart would melt too. But its a tricky situation. There are soo many kids out there who need the same kind of help, can’t do that with everyone, otherwise you’re messing up more than fixing things. I hope they all find their balance. I hope the kids are good to her and understand the sacrifice and risk she’s taking because she’s taking a huge risk by being so selfless ! Over all i think its amazing what she’s doing. In the end its not what you do, Its why you do it! So since she has the right intentions, it will turn out beautiful !
Kandi is doing what any real woman would do and raise those girls no matter what she has lost a man who she loves not loved no matter what weather they broke it off or not feelings r still there all u hoes worry bout ur self and kandi u fly high and shit on da haters loue u and riley the twins also