Last night’s episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills dealt with both the past and future as Kyle hosted a séance, the ladies got their faces touched up and reapplied, and Kim finally confessed that she is moving in with her secret boyfriend, Ken much to Kyle’s shock!
Dr. Paul hosts a Night of Beauty at his plastic surgery office. Kyle wants to do a little laser muffin top removal. Kyle is excited, yet nervous about being subjected to the chub-munching octopus, but threatens to move into Paul’s office if it works. Paul tells her to relax and then the torture of lying there while some little red swirls dance across her mythical fat roll begins.
Lisa is wandering through the labyrinth of Botox and laser treatments looking for Kyle when she stumbles across Taylor. Taylor has snacks and is waiting with some sort of weird numbing goop smeared all over her face as she is prepping to get some new fillers in her cheeks. Lisa advises her to skip the procedures and go straight for the food, which is untouched. Taylor informs us that she has a “genetically thin face” and no matter how much she eats she always looks like Skeletor.
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Camille is also skipping the plastic surgery carnival, because she learned her ex-husband and A-List douche Kelsey Grammer is seeking full-custody of their two children. A saddened Camille opted to stay home for some mommy time; hopefully the nannies were off for the evening!
Lisa confides in Kyle that Russell emailed her some blatant lies about how his marriage to Taylor is amazing and his business is up 900%. Lisa is confused as she is hearing very different stories from her “sources” and she also wonders why she is the only one getting a PR email about the amazing wonders of Russell and Taylor. Kyle opts not to tell her supposed best friend about the little dinner party she attended where Russell accused Lisa of spreading lies and threatened to sue over it. As Taylor is leaving Dr. Paul’s, Lisa confronts her about the email, but Taylor just tries to scurry out the door. Apparently, Russell emailed Lisa because he hoping she’d leak some positive info instead of the truth! Sh-sh-sh-shaaaadeeee!
Kim is late for her appointment with Dr. Paul and calls him from the car. Is Kim watching the road? Kim finally shows and everyone is curious about her odd behavior. Where is Kim all the time? Lisa and Kyle push her for information about her move (which is her latest excuse for not showing up to anything) and Kim is evasive, rattling on and on about how she’ll tell everyone once her kids know. Kim also informs Kyle she will not be coming to her séance because it’s against her religion – even though the psychic has given Kim countless readings before! Lisa is confused about Kim’s constant excuses and gives us a little recap in her best Kimpersonation voice! hehe
Kim plans on getting lip injections, but she’s a lil worried she may look like ol’ trout pout Taylor, especially after she made fun of Taylor’s blowfish lips last year! Karma’s a b!tch. As Kim is getting ready to go into the office, she tells Kyle not to follow her because Kyle will try to tell her what to do! And it’s Kim’s face – she can turn it into Taylor’s if she wants to! Kyle is annoyed that Kim is icing her out and decides to drown her sorrows in food in the waiting room – didn’t she just get love handles removed. My kinda girl!
While talking to Paul, Kim explains she is on some seriously heavy duty psych meds and her erratic behavior immediately makes sense to him. He explains some of the side-effects of mixing the drugs can make the patient seem intoxicated. Kim swears she has not been drinking, nor has she been abusing her medication. Paul encourages her to speak to her doctor. Kim is afraid people will think she is drinking again and hopes she can refrain from alcohol use, because she is much happier without it. Poor Kim. I’m glad she came clean about her struggles.
Meanwhile in the waiting room, Lisa and Kyle get into a completely petty argument about the closeness of Camille’s friendship with Taylor. According to Kyle, Camille and Taylor are like the best of friends who talk on the phone all the time and have lunches together, but Lisa claims Camille told her they aren’t really friends at all and hardly talk. After Kyle’s rude outburst, Lisa waltzes off and Adrienne is stuck with the crazy. At least Paul has lots of drugs on hand!
Adrienne and Kyle check on Kim and immediately Kyle starts lecturing Kim about what she is doing and tells her not to talk while Paul is working. Um… Kyle, last time I checked Paul was the doctor – not you! Kim tells her to back off and Kyle sulks out of the room. Adrienne is on hand to assist in the lip plumping and why is she acting like she’s never seen a botox needle before – her face can barely move!
It’s the night of Kyle’s séance and she calls Brandi to mend fences and make sure she got the invite. Brandi agrees to come, claiming things couldn’t get any worse between the two of them! Kyle’s daughters want to know the gossip and Kyle confides in them – which is perfect, cause they are teens and she acts so high school!
Taylor shows up to see if Kyle needs any help, but clearly her ulterior motive is to talk shiz about Lisa. Taylor claims Lisa is telling everyone she has no friends and this hurts her feelings because she does too have friends and they like her a lot and they are upset that Lisa thinks they don’t really like Taylor … And really. Seriously. Just shut-up! Kyle is like just talk to Lisa, and Taylor is like she scares me, look what she did to that other grifter loser, Cedric! Kyle thinks Lisa might prey on Taylor because she is weak (is that supposed to be reassuring advice?!) and tells Taylor to stop trying so hard.
Rebecca returns as the less crazier of the two nutty psychics from last season. Thankfully Allison was too busy being important on her creepy canceled TV show to make a second appearance! Kyle has borrowed Adrienne’s chef for the evening – is Bernie trying to get a TV gig or something? – and donned her witchy robes. Lisa and Faye Resnick, the morally corrupt friends of Kyle greet each other. I also noticed some scary SWF behavior when Taylor answered Kyle’s door and said “welcome to my house!” I got chills!
Adrienne’s reading is first and Rebecca has channeled her father, George. Adrienne is very moved by what she learns. It’s nice to see an emotional Adrienne. Next up is Brandi, who learns she is going to have a daughter, except she’s not cause it’s not possible.
And then surprise here comes Allison! Apparently at Camille’s girls night/séance from hell, Lisa’s grandmother was trying to channel her through Allison but Allison was distracted by insulting Kyle. Oddly enough all the ladies whip out cigarettes at the mention of Alison’s name – did Kyle put them on the table as a joke?
Taylor’s marriage is addressed and Rebecca informs Taylor that her relationship is very dark, but has both light and dark. She also questions if there are some criminal ties and thinks Taylor and Russell may have been connected in a past life. She encourages Taylor to make her own choices without fear and stop focusing on the money. Hmmmm… good advice – and eerily accurate. How much do we think El Cohen paid Rebecca to say that? Kidding, kidding!
Kyle gets a lecture from beyond from her mother Big Kathy who tells Kyle she was Kim’s mother in a past life, but she needs to let go or she will isolate Kim. Camille goes last and receives word that her grandparents are celebrating her divorce, since Camille didn’t realize how unhappy she was in her marriage. Camille’s grandmother also wants her to know that a great new man is on the horizon and he “swings in the right direction.” Kyle has apparently heard the rumors (as have we all) that Kelsey had a predilection for the drag, and Kyle is claiming that she saw some size 14 women’s pumps in her closet! True or sarcasm?
Following the séance, Kyle visits Kim while she is packing for another move. While all the ladies were receiving word from the other realm Kim was teaching her maid how to clean and doing all the work while the housekeeper giggled at what an easy target Kim is and how she can always trick her into doing her job.
Kim reveals she has been secretly seeing someone for about a year and they are planning to move in together. Kyle knows instantly who it is – the man Kim brought with her to Paris Hilton’s premiere. Kyle is shocked that Kim kept this from her and also confused and hurt. Kyle wants Kim to move closer and thinks Kim might be making the decision out of loneliness.
Kim promises Kyle that is not case – she wants to move in with Ken and she is happy, whether Kyle believes her or not and it is her choice to move in with Ken. Kim reminds Kyle that all her life she has lived for other people: her family, her children, her mom and sisters, her husbands and now she is doing this for her. Kim wants Kyle to meet Ken and get to know him better – and surprise! He is there! It was interesting to see Kim in the big sister role while a blubbering Kyle was so upset about Kim moving on in her life. Kim seemed confident in her choice and very proud and happy. Good for her. I think Kyle will come around and see that Kim’s happiness is the most important thing.
Next Week: Kyle meets Ken and he is wearing a wedding band! Taylor confronts Lisa and the ladies bring up Taylor’s dysfunctional marriage! Eeks. Meltdown time.
Watch What Happens Live: The guests are Lisa and Matthew Broderick. The drinking game word is of course Giggy. Is anyone else getting tired of Andy’s obsession with Giggy? Lisa apologizes for making fun of Kim during the episode. Andy makes Matthew play amateur psychiatrist to armchair diagnose Kim’s psych meds! Hehe. Is Matthew on tranquilizers?!
Lisa denies any involvement in planting stories about Taylor in Us Weekly and accuses Taylor of taking “digs” at her. Frankly, I believe Lisa! Lisa and Matthew talk about the Beverly Hills look from too few plastic surgeries giving everyone the same look!
Lisa is very upset about Kyle’s comments that she preys on weak people and thinks Kyle is different from last season. Even though their relationship is great now, seeing that made her question things. Thai for Tots is debuted and Dana’s son is mimicking some Thai for the cameras! He is such a cute little guy! Lisa reveals that she did not believe a lot of what Taylor was saying last season and early in this season. It sounds like Lisa still doesn’t believe a lot of what Taylor says!
The Poll Question: Is Lisa a troublemaker: Yes or No? And most of the fans say No, but just barely. I don’t think Lisa is a troublemaker!
THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE? IS KYLE OVER-REACTING TO KIM’S NEWS OR JUST A CONCERNED SISTER? IS TAYLOR TRYING TO COME BETWEEN LISA AND KYLE OR DO YOU BELIEVE SHE REALLY IS SCARED OF LISA? DO YOU THINK LISA WENT TO THE TABLOIDS WITH THE STORY OF RUSSELL AND TAYLOR’S SEPARATION?