Oh, the cray-cray ladies of the original Basketball Wives are finally back for a fourth season with two new additions. How we’ve missed you!
The episode begins with Evelyn Lozada meeting with her wedding planner. Evelyn admits that she had hoped for a destination wedding, but seeing as not everyone has passports, the event will need to remain local. She also reveals that she doesn’t want any bridesmaids. She cryptically references the fact that many of her friends haven’t been extremely loyal, and she only wants people she loves and trusts in attendance. Hmmm…to whom could she be referring?
Jennifer Williams is in NYC and has an unlikely meeting with Suzie Ketcham. Suzie inquires as to whether Jenn has spoken to ex-husband Eric since drink toss 2011. It appears that Suzie has relocated. Is this Basketball Wives: Miami or Basketball Wives: New York? Wait, I think it is. My bad. #duh. Jenn learns that Suzie rarely talks to former biffle, Royce Reed. Suzie is equally shocked to find out that Evelyn and Jenn are on the outs.
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Royce is meeting another dancer, Kesha Nichols, and she hopes to find a new friend in this group of frienemies. Royce is happy to connect with some new blood. Royce is quick to tell Kesha that she wants her to form her own opinions about the newbies.
Tami Roman is thrilled to be back in New York for the time being. She lunches with Evelyn and learns that Evelyn and Jenn aren’t speaking. According to Evelyn, her friendship with Jennifer has run its course, and Evelyn has no desire to rekindle that relationship. They both hype the “do you” mentality.
Royce and Kesha are dining with Kenya Bell, who is in the process of divorcing her NBA husband. She also wants to promote an album. Can I predict a BBW/Love & Hip Hop crossover? Good news for Kesha and Royce—Kenya needs back-up dancers for her video! Is Royce this season’s camp counselor? Why is she the first to befriend the newcomers?
Suzie and Royce come together to discuss their past issues. As former besties, Royce feels like Suzie threw her under the bus in an attempt to befriend the “more popular” castmates. Royce contends to be fine with Suzie, although she doesn’t trust her, as far as she can throw her. Suzie is floored to find out that Royce is in contact with Tami, while Royce is shocked to learn that Suzie has been buddying up to Jenn. Suzie, ever the peace maker, proposes that Royce meet up with Jenn, as Jenn and Evelyn are inexplicably (according to Suz) going through a hard time.
Kesha and Suzie are on a
blind friend date thanks to Royce. Suzie doesn’t think Kesha looks like a “Kesha” because she sounds like a “redneck hillbilly.” Way to start stirring the pot! Again, Suzie throws Royce under the bus regarding her ridiculous wardrobe. Kesha is concerned that Suzie would speak so poorly about one of her best friends…who cares how someone dresses? Kesha quickly places Suzie in her “acquaintance” category.
Tami needs to play Sherlock Holmes in regards to the Jennevelyn breakdown. She speaks with Jenn, who seems to be as clueless as Tami, about the discord in their friendship. Tami tries to read between the lines of Jenn’s diatribe, and Jenn admits she would be open to working things out with Evelyn. Tami, who I normally think is a giant thug, seems to have good intentions. She doesn’t seem to be stirring the pot, per the usual. Could I like Tami this season? Perhaps I should refrain from decision making until we’re at least half way through the season.
Suzie takes Jenn to meet Kenya and Kesha. Jenn is immediately on the defensive and conducts a
job friendship interview that involves some pretty tacky and inappropriate questions. “Would you be willing to sleep around like guys do?” Who asks someone that they just met? Halfway through the episode, I’ve witnessed Jenn exert what she thinks is her “power and authority” on the new kids. It was ridiculous, not cool, in my opinion. Kesha and Kenya leave the happy hour with a bad taste in their mouths regarding Jenn, and I can’t say I blame them.
Kenya and Kesha continue their match.com first dates as they grab drinks with Royce and Tami. The new girls are quick to point out to Tami that Suzie acted very differently when they were one-on-one, as opposed to when they spoke to Suzie with Jenn at her side. Kenya attempts to be politically correct and opines that Jenn seemed speculative about having new additions to the cast. Wow. She is very good at holding her tongue.
Tami wants to get Suzie and Jenn’s take on the new ladies. Jenn refers to them as “interesting,” while Suzie is quick to call one of them a weirdo. Suzie may need to watch a marathon of Season One. I used to love Suzie…she needs to remember how it felt to be on the outskirts, trying to make a name for herself with these catty women, who hated her until she kissed enough a$$. Oh Suzie. Tami relays the new women’s thoughts on the staple castmates, and both Suzie and Jenn are borderline insulted.
Shaunie O’Neal steps down from her producer chair to host an intervention with Tami regarding the breakdown in Evelyn and Jennifer’s friendship. How very matriarchal of her. Oh look! Suzie is there, too! She’s constantly on her phone, and can you blame her? Suzie has worked so hard to get in both Evelyn and Jenn’s good graces that she can’t possibly be forced to choose between the two. She zones out, hoping neither of them will realize she’s there. It’s like a seventh grade cafeteria table.
Evelyn immediately goes off on Jenn for not being a loyal friend. Jenn is confused…she doesn’t write her blogs—her publicist does! Evelyn can’t be upset with the nasty things a third party writes on her site’s blog, right? Massive cussing ensues. Evelyn is being her regular f*c%ing factor self, while Jennifer has a whole new attitude. She’s grown some
balls britches, and she is going to go head-to-head with Evelyn. But she’s not that girl, so she falls short.
Shaunie tries to be the voice of reason, but as she only comes around once every episode for five minutes, her words don’t seem to have as much credence. Surprisingly, Tami is the rational person in this dog fight. Is it just me or did everyone—sans Evelynnifer—meet with a public relations team since last season to enhance their likeability? Suzie clearly met with one too, but only to learn how a meek person can produce dramz. I love the BBW in the NYC!
Jenn is crying, accusing, yelling, and cussing, and oddly enough, Evelyn listens patiently and doesn’t attack. Have they switched roles? Someone needs to tell Shaunie she doesn’t have a degree in counseling. Evelyn does get in a below-the-belt dig about Jennifer hiring a new publicist which prompts Tami to joke (maybe?) that Evelyn is a mean bitch. The new season is underway, y’all!
Speaking of, this installment promises a lot of discord between Jennevelyn, a peek into Royce’s budding (a term I’ll use loosely for now) acting career, and family drama over Evelyn’s wedding to Chad Ochocinco. The new ladies also bring the cray. Evelyn hits someone with a wine bottle, starting off a season of hateful brawls. Regardless, Suzie appears to play innocent in each and every one. Can’t wait!
WHAT DID YOU THINK ABOUT THE PREMIERE? HAS SUZIE CHANGED AS MUCH AS I THINK SHE HAS—IS SHE PLAYING BOTH SIDES? OPINIONS ON THE NEW GIRLS? SHOULD EVELYN AND JENNIFER MEND FENCES?