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I hope you tuned in to last night’s Survivor, if for no other reason than to see how much more awful Colton could behave.

After voting off Monica, mean girls Colton and Alicia tell Christina that she has no friends and no allies. Colton compares her to a cockroach after a nuclear war, surviving things she shouldn’t have and suggests she form an alliance with a hermit crab. The duo won’t let Christina have any space in their shelter. Alicia feels the need to get some jabs in at Christina’s expense so Colton doesn’t think she’s too soft. I can’t BELIEVE she teaches special ed. For shame.

It’s been a tad chilly at night on the island, and Salani awakens to a clue that promises childhood backyard shenanigans and potential sweet treats. Kat had a dream where she was murdered by Alicia at the mall. Troyzan is just thrilled he’s not on the misfit Manono tribe.

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At the rewards challenge, the Salani is floored to find out the other tribe voted off arguably their strongest player. It’s a relay race of sorts…each tribe member must race to the top of a hill of crates and toss one coconut onto a trampoline in hopes that it will bounce up and hit a target, and then it’s the next teammates turn. The first team to break five targets wins a trip to a super special island ice cream party where they can gorge on sundaes galore. Sabrina is sitting out for the Salani. It’s definitely harder than it looks! After four plus rounds, Kim hits the first of Salani’s targets. Tarzan and Lief both hit targets for the Manono.

Colton is screaming at his tribe member, calling Christina a stupid “bleep.” This coming from the guy whose last coconut bounced back up and almost hit him in the face. The Salani has only one target left to hit, and Troyzan wins ice cream for his tribe. Colton looks like someone tinkled in his cereal. He blames Christina for his team losing, which is funny considering that only Tarzan and Lief ever hit a target for Manono. The always kind and sensitive Colton believes Christina has three choices: 1) she can give up now; 2) wait two days to get voted off; or 3) jump in the fire and leave by medevac. I hope his parents are proud.

The Salani is head over the heels at the makeshift parlor. Model Jay from Gaffney declares it the best ice cream shack he’s ever seen. The Salani may want to rethink the gorging so they won’t be sick at the immunity challenge. However, it’s quite a morale booster for the group. Day 15 is dubbed as “unforgettable” for the Salani. Back at the Manono…day 15 is not as memorable, except that Colton and Alicia bully Christina to her face, with Colton laughing at her and giving her three choices. Jonas doesn’t understand why they have to be so mean. Christina approaches Jonas and Lief about voting off Alicia as she’ll go with her girls’ alliance in the event of the merge. Alicia overhears and goes off on her. Again, WHO hired her to be a special ed teacher??

That night at Manono, the ever dramatic Colton awakens with a horrible headache – he thinks his brain is swelling. Colton lies his head in Christina’s lap and allows her to play mother hen and massage his temples until he feels better. Christina hopes that this will show Colton she’s a good person. While he appreciates the care she’s giving him (yeah, right), he knows it’s only to stay in the game. The next morning, Colton thinks he’s severely dehydrated. Tarzan is concerned he may have the early signs of appendicitis. Colton is crying and writhing in the middle of the jungle. Christina takes him some water and basically carries him over to a bed of palm fronds she has made. She summons Jeff Probst and the medical team. Who needs that medevac now?

The medical team is concerned that he has appendicitis…Colton is upset. He doesn’t want to leave the game. Jeff asks about the idol, and he brings in the Manono to say good-bye. Alicia is very worried - about herself, of course. Where will this leave her with her ally out of the game? Jonas, however, feels heartbroken about Colton, who he calls a super-fan. Alicia is in shock when Colton reveals he will be keeping the immunity idol as a keepsake. As he’s taken off on a stretcher, Alicia calls him spoiled brat (not to his face, of course). If she’d known this would have happened she would have saved Monica to keep the women’s numbers high. Jonas realizes she’s stressing and starts to consider Christina’s strategy as a viable option.

The Salani receives some tree-mail and learns that there will be no immunity challenge, as both tribes will be going to tribal council. The tribe is speculating about what this could possibly mean. At Manono, Alicia is hoping that Jeff is just calling the groups together to relay the news about Colton. Alicia secures Tarzan’s vote, and when Christina asks if he likes her, he says no. Tarzan says he’d be proud to be Alicia’s dad (really?), but he does at least respect Katrina, even though he says they aren’t friends. Oops! I mean Christina. Jonas and Christina are gunning for Alicia, with Tarzan and Alicia voting off Christina. Lief feels stuck in the middle. Alicia is still pissed that Colton didn’t give her the flipping idol!

At tribal council, the Salani learns of Colton’s acute appendicitis. Kat wonders what an appendix is, while other tribemates share stories of past appendectomies. Alicia tells Sabrina that Colton didn’t give away the idol. The Salani is unsure whether to believe her. Jeff drops another bomb – it’s time to merge! Everyone is nervous and excited, and Jeff reveals that it’s now every player for himself. The merged tribe will make their home on the original beach. Too bad Colton didn’t last long enough to see this happen!

Next week, Tarzan withdraws his alliance from the men after getting into a heated argument with Jonas.

WHAT DID YOU THINK OF LAST NIGHT’S EPISODE? WOULD YOU HAVE LIKED TO SEE COLTON VOTED OFF IN TIME OR WAS THE APPENDICITIS SWEET KARMA? WHO GETS YOUR VOTE AS THIS SEASON’S SURVIVOR NOW THAT THE TRIBES HAVE MERGED?

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