Kris Humphries Signs A Major Basketball Contract! Plus PHOTOS: Kim On Vacation!

So what I’ve learned is that just because you rap it, it doesn’t make it real.  It seems we all could learn a lot from the illustrious Kanye West.

In Kanye’s song Cold he raps, “Lucky I ain’t had Jay drop him from the team.”  Of course, he is referring to his best buddy Jay-Z having girlfriend Kim Kardashian’s ex-husband kicked off the New Jersey Brooklyn Nets.

Today, after scoring a $24 million contract with the team, Kris Humphries tweeted, I’m up at Brooklyn! @ S_C_ ‘lucky I didn’t have Jay drop me from the team’ lol!”  TMZ reports that it is a two year contract with a pretty significant raise, given that his prior contract was for a year at $8 million.  Maybe Beyonce is in her team-owner hubby’s ear a little more than his rapping partner in crime…

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While Kim’s exes are battling it out with an intense rap lyric/twitter session, Kris’ exes are doing the same!  Tit for tat with these folks!  The same site reveals that Kimmie’s high falootin’ legal team is subpoenaing Kris’ ex lover girlfriend booty call baby mama friend Myla Sinanaj in the pair’s never ending divorce proceedings.  Myla sent Kim a string of tweets, beginning with, “Why don’t u enjoy ur Miami trip and stop sending private investigators to my house-Stop dragging me into ur drama.”

When that garnered no response, the wannabe followed up with, “I don’t have to explain Or apologize for who I chose to be friends with.  Subpoena or not!”

Bless her heart.  She needs to stop tweeting.  Oh, but wait!  “Subpoena me twice for the same thing!  Hilarious.”  She’s referring to the fact that Kim’s kamp has been trying to personally serve her even though her attorney has accepted service on her behalf.

Fear not though, Myla.  Kim took  your advice and is enjoying herself, although she’s at the Magic Kingdom, not in Miami.  She recently updated her followers of her whereabouts, tweeting, “Magic Mountain fun today!!! Kendall screaming, Kanye laughing & me crying!”  That priceless picture is below.

I don’t know about y’all, but I think Kris Jenner is totally missing out on the cash cow to end all cash cows.  Who wouldn’t watch a Survivor style show where the only contestants are Kim, Kanye, Kris H., and Myla.  Only there is no Jeff Probst. And no reward challenges.  Oh, and I did I mention that cannibals inhabit one side of the island?  Call me Kris J.  I’ve already trademarked the idea.

Below are some other pics from Kim’s twitter site as well, mainly because I think it’s hilarious just how many photos one can post of one’s self.

WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE WAR OF RAP/TWITTER UPDATE WORDS BETWEEN KIM’S FORMER AND CURRENT PARAMOUR?  THOUGHTS ON MYRA’S TWEETS TO KIM?

OMG!  This is SOOOOOOOO skeery!

Oh Myla, this is when I was in Miami!

Oh the vapors!  (Please note the odd pelvic cut-outs…)

[Photo Credit: Kim’s Instagram/WENN.com]

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