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Last night’s Dance Moms was the same old, same old.  The girls rise above while the moms act like mean teenagers.  A certain hoarse voiced dance instructor sinks to a new low.

It’s pyramid time yet again.  Abby Lee Miller is proud that the girls were the highest scorers, and she wants to keep this winning streak in tact.  Kendall is actually on the bottom of the pyramid…I guess she should be happy she’s even there.  Brooke is also on the bottom for not performing her number due to back spasms.  Abby wants to make sure that Brooke knows she’s not being penalized for being injured…she’s penalized for being scared.  Abby could see the pain in her face starting with the first rehearsal, and she’s upset that Brooke didn’t have the cajones to tell her she couldn’t dance before the actual competition.  Paige is also on the bottom for not coming to rehearsal…because she had a broken foot.  That makes sense.

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McKenzie is in the middle for crying after Abby called her a brat.  That’s a lesson a six-year-old needs to learn. Maddie is also in the middle, followed by Chloe for her lack of confidence.  Finally, Nia scores the top spot.  I am so happy for that precious little girl.  She is praised for garnering a standing ovation.  Nia is crowned the week’s team captain, meaning she has to critique her teammates and friends.  Nia seems to wish she was back in the middle of the pyramid.  The troupe is heading to Myrtle Beach, South Carolina…my neck of the woods.  The state, not the beach.

The group dance features Maddie.  The idea behind the solo is that the other dancers want to be like Maddie, but when they can’t achieve that, they pull her back down to their level.  I’m just glad that Abby isn’t personally creating divides among these precious girls.  Jill is still on the outskirts, and Abby chastises Kendall in the studio.  Abby wants Kendall to know that she’s still a guest in the studio.  She hasn’t yet earned her spot.  Maddie seems very uncomfortable being the center of the group dance.  Poor Melissa sit silently while the moms criticize her daughter’s dance skills.  Christi goes off…and she goes off in a way that the entire studio of children can hear her.  If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times, why can’t these moms take a page from their sweet and supportive daughters’ playbook?  Melissa and Christi are about to come to blows.  When Christi accuses Melissa of having an affair with her boss, Melissa stomps off while Kelly, Holly, and Jill sit in shock.  McKenzie follows her mom out of the studio in tears.

At the next rehearsal, Jill sees Melissa’s absence as a way to get Kendall into the troupe.  Meanwhile, Candy Apple Cathy is excited to announce that her dancers will also be competing at Myrtle Beach.  She has brought back her private choreographers, and she’s hoping that they will help her dancers crush Abby’s crew.  Cathy has her dancers slamming their fists on a table, pretending that the table is studio skipping Jill.  Gracious.  Her group practices their group dance which Cathy touts as hot.  Abby is beyond upset about Maddie and McKenzie’s absence.  Kelly thinks that Melissa is scared to return, knowing that she was in the wrong.  Poor dance captain Nia is forced to call Maddie to find out her whereabouts.  Maddie reveals to Nia that her mom won’t let her come back to dance.  Melissa finally compromises…she drops off her daughters but won’t stay to face the other moms.

Abby is beyond peeved that Cathy and her dancers will be competing in Myrtle Beach.  Cathy has brought in a ringer, but Abby is convinced that Maddie can beat him.  Abby confronts Melissa about her absence the prior day.  Melissa is upset to learn that Maddie will be getting a solo a night before the competition.  She doesn’t think her daughter deserves that type of pressure, and she turns her down.  Of course Christi can’t believe that Maddie is rewarded with a solo when Chloe has been present and dancing all along.  Fear not, Chloe has a solo against Cathy’s star dancer Justice once Melissa pulls Maddie.  Chloe is working hard to perfect her dance, but it is a lot of pressure.  Abby only hopes that Chloe will find some confidence to shine through with her technique.  The mothers continue to bicker.  God, can someone please ask these moms to stop living Mean Girl style vicariously through their children?

McKenzie loves her acrobatic duet with KendallAbby wants a clean sweep at the competition, but the duet has her worried.  Abby approaches Maddie about doing a solo when Melissa isn’t around.  As much as Maddie is loyal to Abby, she must side with her mom.  Abby is livid.  If her dancers lose to the Candy Apples, it will be all on Maddie and Melissa’s shoulders.  That’s fair.

The girls arrive in Myrtle Beach.  Abby pulls Jill aside to get the dirty on the Candy Apple dancers…after all, Jill’s daughter was a Candy Apple up until a few weeks ago.  Cathy has “guest star” who will be performing with Justice who isn’t a member of the studio.  So dirty!  Chloe is first to perform against Justice.  She is such a talent…too bad her mother is a loon!  Justice is up next.  He looks like an extra from Lord of the Flies.  He’s amazing, but I’m so confused by his entire performance.  It doesn’t seem to align with the music.  In the dressing room, Chloe is mobbed by her friends.  Abby thinks that Chloe has a chance of beating Justice, but had Maddie done a solo, she would have two chances to beat the little kid.  Abby wanting to school a little boy makes so much sense given that Abby is a GROWN WOMAN.

Maddie is the clear star of the powerful group dance.  It is phenomenal. The Candy Apples group number follows.  Their outfits are anything but age appropriate.  Cathy realizes they are missing a prop and stops the number.  Redo!  That’s embarrassing.  I am not the parent of preteen girls, but I’d like to think that if I was, I’d have a problem with the Candy Apple costumes.

Chloe loses to Justice by a tenth of point in the junior solo awards.  Abby chalks it up to the judges trying to make dance important to boys.  Christi knows that her daughter will likely get an earful due to the loss.  The Candy Apple’s burlesque number places third to a first place Abby Lee troupe in the group number.  Abby’s dream of clean sweep was crushed by Chloe’s second place finish…and she makes sure to relay that to her dancers.  Instead of congratulating Chloe, she asks Maddie if now knows why she should have agreed to a solo.  I want to reach through my television and smack her.  Melissa knows that Abby’s announcement has put unnecessary pressure on her daughter, and both Maddie and Chloe (who are best friends!) are teary for different reasons.   Abby hopes that her group can stomach being beaten by a bunch of boys.  Wow.  Sexist much?

McKenzie and Kendall’s duet is already a loser in Abby’s eyes, as they are up against Justice and Mystery Guest Dancer.  I’m not all that into the boys’ routine.  It’s like a bad excerpt from Mad Men, if the advertising execs were eight.  McKenzie and Kendall totally rock their duet.  Although Abby was convinced they would lose, I’m sure she’s all about taking credit for their amazing number.  They totally beat Justice and No Name.  Something tells me that Kendall (and Jill) will be welcomed back into the troupe.  While Abby didn’t get her clean sweep (she blames Chloe…I want to throttle her), they still won.  Abby and Cathy then get into it, and Melissa joins in to the fray.  These women are ridiculous.

Next week, the girls struggle with hip hop.  The moms get embroiled in even more drama.

TELL US-WHAT DID YOU THINK OF LAST NIGHT’S EPISODE?  DOES ABBY NEED TO GET OVER HER BEEF WITH THE CANDY APPLES?

[Photo Credit: Lifetime]

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