Last week's explosive episode of Teen Mom 3 was exhausting to watch. Alex Sekella and Matt McCann do not belong together – not in a relationship, not in the same house, not on the same street. Nothing. No amount of therapy will fix this toxic relationship.
This week on Teen Mom 3, Alex and Matt come face to face for the first time since their fight. Also, Briana DeJesus loses her live-in nanny for a week, Mackenzie Douthit and Josh McKee return to the rodeo, and Katie Yeager models in a fashion show.
Katie's nervous about walking the runway in a wedding dress and – gasp! – lingerie. She feels self-conscious about her post-baby body and wonders if Joey Maes still finds her attractive. A friend tries to boost Katie's self-esteem, adding, "You're the mother of his child, I'm sure that's a thousand times sexier than just being his girlfriend."
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Briana pouts when Brittany plans a week long road trip with her friends. She wishes she too could go, which is understandable, but her "sentenced to a miserable life on the couch because I'm a single teen mom" schtick is wearing thin. Briana quickly comes to realize that she'll have to care for Nova on her own – for the first time – while Mom is at work. She's not happy.
Mackenzie and Josh are off to the season's first rodeo. Gannon, looking super cute in a cowboy hat, joins them for a short time. The rodeo, complete with a monkey in chaps riding a dog, gives Josh life. And a personality.
Next Alex and her mom talk about last week's nuclear explosion. Mom points out that Alex has anger issues (<— understatement of the year) and Alex says she hasn't heard from Matt since their fight (<— cue the iPhone). Right on cue, Matt texts Alex, "Sorry for being a shit head." Alex whines, saying she never wants to speak to Matt again, and Mom reminds her that she kind of has to for the next 18 years. Suck it up,
Katie's runway show is in two days, so she takes a random Zumba class to jump start her "get back in shape" plan. Two days? Seems legit.
Later, Katie tries to talk to Joey about the show, but he doesn't want anything to do with it. Joey: "How many times have you worn lingerie for me?" Katie says zero. "Exactly. You can't tell me you're going to show your ass to everyone and expect me to be supportive." Katie dwells on her less than pefect stomach. "I'm not worried about anyone seeing your stomach." Katie comes to the conclusion that Joey prefers "mopey Katie" over "confident Katie". #CommunicationFail
Back to the rodeo, Josh tells a friend he's ready to ride again. He hopes Mackenzie will support his decision. Meanwhile, before Brittany takes off on her adventure, Briana gives her a "Best
Nanny Sister/Aunt" trophy.
Alex continues therapy (PTL) sans Matt. She insists she is officially over him, adding, "His constant drama and crap interferes with my life and it's, like, I don't want to deal with it." Alex claims to want only what's best for Arabella, and deep down, she knows screaming and fighting in front of a baby is no good.
Katie preps for the fashion show. While applying Katie's (horrid) makeup, a friend blabs, "No way would I ever wear lingerie in front of people now, let alone after having a baby." Awesome pep talk!
It's time - Katie thinks Joey will love the show. She rocks the wedding dress. Joey looks, um, like Joey – half pissed off, half on the verge of a smile. He's a tricky one. Katie walks the runway in lingerie. Joey storms out of the building. What a drama queen! Katie's lingerie isn't even revealing – I've seen way more skin on Instagram/Twitter or at the mall/high school football games.
Mackenzie and Josh have a heart-to-heart about the rodeo. Mackenzie shares her concerns about safety but ultimately chooses to support Josh.
Alex's boyfriend drama put her further behind in school. Yes, really. She asks her younger siblings to help entertain Arabella while she studies. They're happy to help, of course, but no-nonsense Arielle wants to know where things stand with the loser boyfriend. Once again, Matt calls the very second Alex threatens/promises to never speak to him again.
What a coincidence. Matt wants to clear the air, move on, etc. Alex agrees to meet the next day.
Arielle gives Big Sis the side eye (I love her) and asks what she expects to come out of this meeting. Alex hopes she and Matt can communicate well enough to co-parent Arabella, adding, "We need to see if we can talk without yelling; if we can't, we're screwed."
Meanwhile Briana continues to wallow in her self-pity. "Brittany's been gone for four days," she laments. "It's been really hard taking care of Nova by myself." Briana looks frazzled. Nova cries. Remember that self-righteous "you don't know what it's like to care for a baby on your own" beat down she gave Devoin (who, don't get me wrong, I despise) a few weeks ago? That's funny.
Katie and Joey barely talk after the fashion show. Katie eventually shares that she doesn't plan to do the fashion show next year because she's not pretty enough. Joey asks, "Who told you that?" Katie says, "You." He didn't say that – exactly. Is Katie looking for reassurance or a fight? Joey picks fight, taunting Katie, "You have to show your shit to everyone to get your confidence back? You like strutting up and down that runway?" Katie responds, "F–k you," and walks out the the room with Molli. #CommunicationFailAgain
Mackenzie's mom is not happy to hear about Josh's return to the rodeo. What if he gets hurt again? Disabled for life? Killed? Mom wants to know who will support her daughter, whose only goal in life is to be a cheerleader, and her grandson if something terrible happens to Josh. Mackenzie acknowledges the risks but tells Mom to stop harping about the what ifs. "I'm going to let him rodeo," she says. "I don't have a problem with it, so leave me alone."
Is rodeo a verb now? Anyway, this convo would be much funnier if Babs were Mack's mom, "I hope ya have fun livin' at the rodeo with ya booooyfriend, Mackenzeeee. Howwable. What ya need in life – Ya babyyy needs a fatha and ya booooyfriend needs a real job! This howwable, Mackenzeeee. Howwable."
Briana and Mom look exhausted and miserable without their nanny. Briana admits, "I'm so lucky to have you and Brittany around, because without you guys, I don't know what I'd do." Perhaps get off the couch? Go to school? Take your baby outside? Go for a walk? Countless single moms manage to support themselves and enjoy their lives every. single. day. with much less help than Briana has. In all seriousness, is she suffering from postpartum depression?
Briana starts to cry, thinks she's a burden to Mom and Brittany. "I promise you, you're not," says Mom. "We're a family and we have to take care of one another. Nova's going to be amazing. She has three women to look up to and we're all going to teach her the right thing."
Alex meets up with Matt, as promised, and brings Arabella. Her decision to bring the baby to the "let's not scream our faces off" trial run puzzles me. But, Matt seems genuinely happy to see Arabella, and he cuddles and kisses her. Alex asks Matt why he wants to talk – I assume she hopes he wants her back. He doesn't. He wants to see Arabella in spite of her. Alex's attitude takes a sharp turn to the right, headed straight towards Bitchville.
Matt "lets" Arabella fall face first into the picnic table. The baby's face plant doesn't register on Alex's bitch-o-meter because she's only focused on Matt. How dare Matt not want her back. How dare Matt be an inexperienced parent. How dare Matt breathe. How dare Matt not want to fight with her.
Matt ignores Alex's taunts until she accuses him of being high. Matt denies using drugs despite the fact that he can barely keep both eyes open at the same time – and he just dropped his child for the umpteenth time. That poor child's head. Alex calls him a liar and forbids him to see Arabella until he gets his shit together. Matt walks away. Alex holds her head, leaving her baby, who is reaching out for Matt, completely unsupported on top of the picnic table.
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Photo credit: MTV