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Last night on Ladies of London new allegiances were formed while old ones frayed. Showergate continued. And Noelle Reno was somehow in the middle of all of it. Just the way she likes it.

And we’re back in Mapperton. It’s the morning after the Bambi dinner. Caroline Stanbury, Juliet Angus, and Marissa Hermer convene in Noelle’s room at the Lodge. Juliet reports that Caprice Bourret has already checked out. The other three are surprised. Caroline thinks it’s due to her and her new friendships with the American women. She can’t help it if they think she’s fab, Caprice. Juliet starts bagging on Caprice (and Brits in general), but Marissa doesn’t want to take sides. She thinks Caprice left early because of her pregnancy. Juliet claims she was the nicest person ever when she was pregnant. Marissa wishes she would have known her back then. Boom. Awkward silence.

We move to Annabelle Neilson at the stables. She’s training for the charity race that she’ll be riding in. Her horse is appropriately named Mr. Fickle. Annabelle says she loves animals more than humans. We flashback to her talk with Juliet. She reiterates that it takes her awhile to warm up to people and they have to earn her trust. Well, Juliet sometimes acts like a horse’s ass, so maybe there’s hope for her and Annabelle.

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Back in Mapperton, the Ladies meet up with Luke (yay!) for breakfast. He wonders why Caprice isn’t with them. Juliet, doing her best Marissa imitation, says Caprice left because she was pregnant and tired. Caroline attempts to steer the conversation towards a happier topic: Luke. Yes, let’s go with that. But, Marissa is angry and attempts to storm out dramatically. Too bad her chair gets in the way. She runs out in tears anyway with Noelle following close behind.

Outside, Marissa tells Noelle that she’s had enough of Juliet. Her feelings are hurt. Marissa can’t help it if she’s overly empathetic to everyone. She’s tired of Juliet calling her Mother Theresa. There are worse things. In her interview, Noelle explains that Juliet and Marissa are friends because they’re the ONLY two Americans in London and they wouldn’t be so close if they were in the US. Or if they weren’t on a reality show. Caroline comes out and diffuses the situation. The three go back inside.  Marissa slams Juliet for being rude and aggressive, which prompts Juliet to cry and run out. Oh geez. Caroline goes after her even though she’s totally over the situation. She just wants to finish her champagne breakfast in peace.  Juliet returns to the table and they all half-heartedly cheers to the weekend.

Back in London, Noelle and Scot finally move into their flat. It’s a cute place, but I’m sure Noelle thinks it’s beneath her and her frayed acid wash denim skirt. She says that they’re in a good place, as a couple. She always had faith in Scot. She actually said that with a straight face. Later, Noelle calls Caprice to rehash Mapperton. She shares that the other Ladies were mad at her for leaving early. Caprice blames her pregnancy, as Marissa guessed. The talk turns to Caprice’s business success. Noelle says that Caprice has become a mentor to her. And a friend. She’s basically her everything. It’s very Regina George/Gretchen Wieners. Noelle reminds Caprice about her upcoming charity event. It will be fun.

Meanwhile, Marissa puts on her Elphaba green shoes (with matching bag) and meets up with her husband, Matt. Today she’ll be getting her UK citizenship. She’s nervous, like a bride on her wedding day. Except this time she’ll be marrying a country. So England and Matt are brother husbands? Afterwards Matt gives her a beautiful pair of earrings to celebrate. It’s a sweet moment. Marissa brings up her fight with Juliet. In her interview, she says Juliet better be careful because London is a small town with a big name. She’s an authority on London now that she’s a Brit, ya know.  

Across town, Juliet meets with Caroline at her office. They proceed to try on thousands of dollars worth of jewelry that Caroline has laying around. Just a typical Monday at Gift Library. Caroline brings up the Mapperton situation. For the thousandth time, she tells Juliet to calm down and stop picking fights. Juliet seems to listen. Or maybe she was just hypnotized by all the diamonds.  

Later on, everyone gathers for Noelle’s fundraising event for Chasing Zero, an AIDS foundation. Noelle is hoping that this positive press will overpower the nasty press from Scot’s legal problems. Keep hoping, girl. On the way to the party, Caprice tells Julie, who’s wearing some sort of sunset-rainbow-explosion dress, that Caroline and Juliet were trashing her for leaving Mapperton early. But Noelle has her back. They arrive at the party and Noelle is overjoyed to have her there. She wants Caprice to be impressed with the event. Now who’s getting smoke blown up their tushie, Caprice? Caroline and Caprice promptly ignore each other…while standing right next to each other.

Meanwhile, Juliet, while wearing an unfortunate yellow bow-filled dress, calls Marissa and asks her to meet outside. For a rumble? No, for an actual apology. Who’d have guessed? They hug it out and Marissa says they’re like sisters. It’s nice. And it will be fleeting. Just like sisters. Marissa says she would actually hate Juliet if she was nice all the time. She loves her just the way she is. Except sometimes.  

Inside the party, Noelle and Caroline are discussing charities and how Caroline never talks about her own charity. Like Fight Club? Caprice, feeling that she needs more smoke blown up her tush, drags Noelle away. She asks if Noelle was annoyed that she left Mapperton early. Noelle vehemently denies that she could ever be mad at Caprice. Caroline watches from across the room and says Noelle will ultimately have to make a choice between her and Caprice. Better choose wisely, Angel.  

Later Scot and Noelle are rearranging dishes in their flat when Marissa calls. She reports that Caprice has asked her to throw her baby shower at Bumpkin. Marissa asks Noelle to help her with it. Of course she agrees.

Later Noelle meets up with Caroline and Juliet at Roberto Cavalli. She’s wearing the shortest leopard print skirt known to man. Or as Caroline calls it: poor man’s Cavalli. Noelle mentions that she and Marissa will be throwing a baby shower for Caprice. Caroline rolls her eyes and explains that Caprice asked her first. This is the rudest thing that’s ever happened to her. Really? The rudest ever? Noelle feels caught in the middle. And is secretly loving it. Caroline says she can’t teach Caprice manners and moves on. They start to actually shop. Marissa tries on a conservative (for her) dress. Caroline thinks it makes her look more elegant than she normally does. Juliet agrees that Noelle doesn’t look like a two-bit whore for once. I cackle along with them. Noelle, not so much. She says Juliet is becoming Caroline’s minion. Pot meet kettle, Noelle.

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Back at the stables Annabelle and Mr. Fickle are training again for the race. Hayley, the jockey trainer, warns Annabelle about the dangers of riding a horse at 40 miles an hour. Foreshadowing much? Annabelle takes off. Things seem to be going well until we suddenly slam to black. Uh oh.  We pick up with Julie going to visit an injured Annabelle. She looks horrible. Annabelle fell off Mr. Fickle, going 45 miles an hour. She has a broken pelvis and is in a ridiculous amount of pain. What have I done, she wonders. I bet she still likes Mr. Fickle more than Juliet, though.  

Next week, it’s dinner party drama.

Recap Author: Geoff

Photo Credit: Bravo TV

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