Y’all, is it just me, or is Love & Hip Hop Hollywood getting more and more comical? And scripted? Don’t get me wrong–it kind of makes me enjoy it more! Last night begins as Yung Berg is trying to seduce Teairra Mari with the new music, and he’s outfitted the studio with champagne and strawberries. While Teairra loves the song, she isn’t feeling his romantic intentions. She’s fine with a professional relationship, but she can do without his advances. Berg tells Teairra that Hazel is fighting mad that they are working together, and Teairra goes off on her former friend. Why does Hazel care if Berg produces a song for her? It’s not like they are getting it on behind the scenes. And just like that Berg is brought back to reality.
Of course, at the gym, Hazel is recapping her recent fight with Berg with Masika. In turn, Masika explains her friendship with Berg because she wants to keep things one hundred. Hazel is surprised to hear this…while she knew Masika and Berg were acquaintances, but now Masika is acting like they’re besties. Masika promises she cooled her friendship with Berg when she saw how he continued to treat Hazel, and she reminds Hazel that he’s always been a player and a flirt. Hazel disagrees. In her wacky world, he only had eyes for her!
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It turns out that Fizz was right–Amanda is being shady. He pulled up next to her in the car and she was in the car next to him with the guy on whom she cheated on him. Fizz even watched her decline his phone call! Amanda promises that she just didn’t know he was calling, and her dalliance was just an innocent breakfast among friends who used to have relations. No biggie. Fizz is understandably mad, and Amanda doesn’t seem to upset that she’s been caught. I don’t understand why he’s giving her so many chances…unless he needs a baby-sitter for later!
Nikki invites Teairra Mari over to commiserate about their newly single status. They both have the girls on display to announce their readiness to mingle. Nikki is glad to be rid of the lying Mally Mal, and Teairra wonders about Berg’s intentions. She wants to focus solely on her career. Because this show is just one coincidence after another, Nikki invites Teairra to visit a new strip club that opening. Her family doesn’t own the club, but they are leasing the space, and Nikki feels it would be a professional courtesy to attend. Whoever could be working at this club?
After some soul searching, Fizz wonders if he’s been looking for a lady or for a nanny new mom for Cameron. He comes to the conclusion that perhaps he should let Cameron’s actual mother play more of a role in his son’s life. He’s house hunting, and he’s invited Moniece to join him as an olive branch. Fizz wants to co-parent, and Moniece questions his relationship with Amanda. He politely declines to discuss the pair’s issues, but Moniece is secretly thrilled that things are on the downhill slide with Fizz and Amanda. Moniece then hits up Fizz for money for her vibrator business as her investor has flaked on her. Fizz decides to cut this visit short, and Moniece reminds Fizz of the crazy, animalistic sexy times they used to have together. She hopes that, as his baby mama, she can crash at his new house whenever she likes. She’s kidding, right? Poor Fizz. He clearly needs to tune up his crazy radar. He sure knows how to pick ’em!
Masika feels guilty for neglecting her friendship with Berg, so she’s meeting him for drinks. If I close my eyes, I can’t really tell their voices apart. They have identical lisps. The duo giggles while dishing about Berg’s record. He then offers her Hazel’s track. Masika doesn’t want to snake anything from a sort of friend, but at the end of the day, she’s a business woman. The two seal the almost deal with a super flirty Instagram picture. Across town, Ray-J is dining with his girlfriend, and he’s upset about the recent turn of events in his life. Ray has been with some of the hottest women in the world (his words, not mine), but he thinks Princess may finally be wife material. She wants him off the sauce though.
In an effort to make amends, Amanda comes by Fizz’s house bringing toys and candy for Cameron. That is one adorable little boy! Amanda promises Fizz that she has now cut all of the friendship ties with her ex, but she’s said this before. Fizz finds her promises to be hollow, and he lets it slip that Moniece came house hunting with him. This conversation quickly escalates to Amanda angry that Fizz is planning to move on with Moniece. Wait, did he say that? Well, he certainly didn’t try to downplay what happened, now did he?
It’s the night of the strip club’s private opening, and Hazel is dropping in on Masika to find out about these little Instagram photo shoots. Masika starts yelling that Berg has been her friend forever, and Hazel is appalled that this chick wants her leftovers. Masika reminds Hazel that Berg never wanted anything serious. She finds it silly that Hazel is so mad about a guy that Masika has never diddled and never wants to diddle. I don’t buy that for a second, and neither does Hazel. Both women sound like total morons, but I guess that it the theme of this franchise!
Amanda has reached out to Moniece because she’s taken major issue with her house hunting with Fizz and her inappropriate jokes. Moniece sits calmly (too calmly!) while Amanda lays out her complaints. Moniece quietly states that every time Amanda breaks up with Fizz, even if just for a few days over pettiness, she’s breaking up with Cameron. Moniece wants Amanda to be a constant in Cameron’s life…or not in it at all. She requests that Amanda respect her as Cameron’s mother, but Amanda goes off, saying she won’t respect someone who doesn’t respect her. Amanda then begins listing all of the things she does for Cameron. To be fair, Moniece warns her calmly (again, too calmly!) to stop calling her delusional. Amanda then decides to see how many times she can say delusional in one conversation. Moniece stealthly swipes a handful of Amanda’s weave, pulling Amanda’s head down on the table and ripping at her hair. As the crew attempts to free Amanda from Moniece’s death grip, Moneice calmly whispers that she’d warned Amanda about saying she’s crazy. She then lets go and calmly walks out of the restaurant. I think she may be my new favorite.
Nikki and Teairra arrive at the club opening and, again, what the hell is Nikki wearing? Does she own anything that doesn’t look like it came off the clearance rack at Frederick’s of Hollywood? Hazel is miffed to see her former bestie Teairra, and she immediately blames Masika for inviting her nemesis. Of course, Nikki is equally miffed when the billboard is unveiled to reveal Masika as the face of the club. Awkward!
TELL US-WHAT DID YOU THINK OF LAST NIGHT’S EPISODE? TEAM AMANDA OR TEAM MONIECE?
[Photo Credit: VH1]