When I’m wrong, I say I’m wrong. I know it wasn’t you who got Baby in trouble…and I was wrong thinking last week’s episode of Southern Charm was one for the books. Last night’s installment had it all! Dancing, conspiracies, that long-awaited “shameless strumpet” word bomb, and can we just dish on the ending for one moment? No bird has ever flown higher! Let’s dive right in, shall we?
The crew learns of Thomas Ravenel’s assault charges while they wreaking havoc on the croquet court. Great paté, but they’ll have to motor if they want to make it to dance lessons in time. Cameran Eubanks assumes that Kathryn Dennis will be motoring her sassy ass back to Charleston to publicly support T-Rav, and Craig Conover is thanking his lucky stars that something more pressing (and actually in the press) is diverting the attention away from his questionable decisions from the night before. The Charmers ponder how Kathryn will respond to the allegations, and Jennifer Snowden responds, “She doesn’t process things like an adult. It won’t really sink in with her the brevity of the situation.” It is a very brief situation indeed. The crew learns that T-Rav’s accuser is Kathryn’s best friend. A stylist by trade and an opportunist by nature, according to Cameran.
I am not quite sure how to take this season’s Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta. While the men are as messy as ever (I’m still looking at you, Kirk!), the women’s behavior is all over the charts. Is Mimi a hustler or most questionable of the group? Do the “artists” some of the folks are trying to “manage” understand the concept of professionalism? What is the world coming to when Stevie J. is the most normal person on the show? I don’t have many more evens to can’t.
Last night’s episode begins with the much touted meeting between Nikko’s wife Margeaux and Joseline Hernandez. Joseline is hoping that her enemy’s enemy could potentially be her best friend. Margeaux admits that it’s hard to be in Atlanta where she has no ties, and Nikko’s sex tape with Mimi Faust has thrown her for a loop. While she and Nikko weren’t together when he made the tape with Mimi Faust, Margeaux didn’t like being married to a man who the world thinks leaked the shower rod video. Margeaux lets it slip that it was Mimi’s plan to devise the story surrounding how Vivid ended up with the footage because she was hurting for cash. From inception to post-production, Mimi was in charge even though she played the victim. Joseline isn’t surprised in the least to learn this news, and she can’t wait to use it against Stevie J.’s ex.
Did y’all have a nice weekend? I did…until I saw these pictures. Like the generous person I am, I had to share them with all of you…if for no other reason than to have people to commiserate with in the “Things You Can’t Unsee Club.” Remember when Porsha Williams entered the Real Housewives of Atlanta scene with a very reserved and conservative demeanor? My how times have changed!
After going through the requisite housewives divorce and becoming acclimated to feuding nastily with her co-stars, Porsha has been totally initiated into the realm of reality television. Girlfriend’s even got her own line of lingerie to boot which she promotes shamelessly all over her Instagram.
It was all about the hot mess express on Monday’s episode of Southern Charm, but the mode of transportation wasn’t a crazy train–instead it was a golf cart! After Kathryn Dennis went off on Whitney Sudler-Smith in a cyclone-esque storm of hate (one friend described it as “feral”), Craig Conover came to her rescue with more vino, keys to a battery operated tiny-car, and sticks and sand to generate body heat. It was, as you all recall, scandalous.
While Shepard “Shep” Rose had plenty to say about Craig’s recent tomfoolery during the group’s dinner on Jekyll Island, Cameran Eubanks has been the one talking it about it post-show. While some see her as a pot-stirrer, I honestly believe she cares for these turds, and she’s at her wits end trying to help them make good decisions. Of course, we all know that good decisions make for bad reality television. Thankfully for Bravo, there is no shortage of idiotic behavior when it comes to the charming cast!
Kate Plus Seven doesn’t have quite the same ring, now does it? Until the Gosselin sextuplets turn eighteen, you can bet their fame hungry (one confirmed, one claims to hate the spotlight but always ends up in the tabloids) parents will be fighting over the welfare of all eight of their children in a very public manner.
TLC’s first family became even more famous after Jon and Kate divorced. Kate ditched her signature rooster hairdo and sought out any television appearance available, while Jon spent his time in tumultuous relationships with much younger women, palling around with Michael Lohan, and morphing into a free Ed Hardy billboard. Sure, they were super entertaining to those of us who love a reality train wreck, but their poor children didn’t sign up for this madness! And, like all things Gosselin, the saga continues.
I’d say congratulations are in order, dear readers! Cheers to each one of you for making it through yet another extra-long season of Dance Moms with the always controversial Abby Lee Miller at the helm. Last night was the last reunion before Abby packs her bags and opens an ALDC franchise in Los Angeles. As always, executive producer Jeff Collins rules the sofa roost, but this time, the once silver fox has died his hair a special shade of carrot and gotten himself a spray tan. Fame, y’all!
Abby is the first one who joins Jeff on the stage, and he brings up her now contentious relationship with Holly. Abby feels Holly’s jealousy runs deep, and she believes that her dancers are a success because every last one of them is chasing Maddie’s fame. Nia’s turn will come, she admonishes. Jeff summons Holly to the couch, and Jeff shows footage of Abby lying about saying Maddie and Kalani were the only ones who would ever book jobs. Holly cites her frustrations stemming from Abby attacking the children to retaliate when she’s upset with the mothers. All Holly wants is for her daughter to be treated with respect, but Abby doesn’t care to try to repair their relationship. Holly has several fond memories with Abby that she holds dear, but Abby remains stone-faced. Thankfully, the girls take the stage to perform their Stomp the Yard group number inspired by Orange is the New Black. More dancing, less mindless bickering please!
Southern Charm, I can’t thank you enough for being the beacon of light in my dreaded Mondays, and last night’s episode was no different…although Shepard “Shep” Rose could’ve have laid off Craig Conover just a tad. The cast is packing for their Jekyll Island adventure, and Landon Clements’ fingers are crossed for a refined weekend of manicured lawns and low-key dinners. Craig calls Whitney Sudler-Smith to bum a ride, but alas, Whitney is an hour into the trek or else he’d turn around to retrieve him. Of course, Whitney spins this lie as he packs his Louis Vuitton weekender just a quarter mile from Craig’s apartment, but whatevs. Cameran Eubanks and Shep are tasked with carpooling the wayward law student, and they have agreed they need continue the tough love when it comes to his downward spiral. Shep is all in, and Captain Craig (seriously dude, that hat?) gets defensive about bar study and rent payments. Meanwhile, in the car with Jennifer Snowden, Kathryn Dennis hopes this trip will solidify her spot in the clique on her own merits, and not just as Thomas Ravenel’s plus one.
Landon and her sister Powell are the first to check in, followed by Whitney. Over drinks, Landon apologizes in advance to the bartender for her friends who have yet to materialize. Shep and Craig can’t handle the geriatric vibe they’re getting from the island. What is this place? Heaven’s waiting room? The two are forced to mainline Scotch to tolerate this retirement community. Cameran is beyond embarrassed by their childish antics. This is why she’s child free at the moment. Jennifer and Kathryn arrive as the others take off on a bike ride. Their swift departure and refusal to wait for the girls is an omen for Kathryn. She’s all Stephanie Tanner about the situation. Rude. They should be thankful they avoided the testosterone fueled beach cruiser nightmare that is Craig and Shep arguing over how to best reach the ocean. Shep takes every opportunity to insult Craig about his current life situation, calling him so broke he can’t even pay attention. I am definitely stealing that line. The boys spar over their mapquest skills when they’re informed they are about as far from the beach as is humanly possible.
Last night’s Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta wasn’t really what I was expecting. Sympathizing with Stevie and mild S&M? Game changer for sure! Stevie J. has survived his first ten days in rehab, and he’s feeling much better about his recovery. However, he’s not permitted to have visitors so Joseline Hernandez has arrived to rehash her sit down with Mimi Faust. There goes Stevie’s calm vibe. He wants her to work on her anger management, and he urges her to give up smoking now that he’s giving up drinking. Stevie shares that he can’t be around liquor for at least a year once he’s out of the program, and he’d prefer not to be subjected to any tempting substances. Hold up! It’s not Joseline’s problem that Stevie has a drinking problem…she’s not giving up smoking just to appease him. Stevie requests that she talk to his doctor about his post-rehab needs, but she isn’t interested in talking to some bunk-ass therapist.
I didn’t realized that Kalenna and Tony Vick would be joining us again this season, but they’re back and she’s about to give birth. They complain that the pregnancy came about at the most inopportune time. They are suffering from financial problems and had to close their studio mid-production of her latest album. Tony relays that he has the chance to invest in some clubs with a a real estate developer. Kalenna thinks his scheme is too risky, plus the last time he worked with this friend, there were rumors all over town that Tony was cheating on her. Speaking of bad business deals, Karlie Redd is meeting up with Rasheeda to discuss the messiness at her boutique opening. Karlie wants to know why Rasheeda brought Erica Dixon to the opening of her event after Karlie ditched her plan with Erica to open a store. Rasheeda accuses Jessica Dime Piece for stirring the pot unnecessarily, and the one get into a screaming match in the restaurant in an attempt to one-up one another. AARP Karlie speeds off, and not a single patron in that crowded restaurant acted like anything was weird about two grown woman shrieking insults at one another during the lunch rush. Weird for “reality,” I know…