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mob wives mermaids

Nothing like coming home from a twelve hour work day to drama filled two-hour premiere of Mob Wives! I don’t know if it’s a punishment or Christmas all over again, but I’m going to go with the latter. Karen Gravano is living the dream, back in New York after a stint in Arizona, and she wants her teenage daughter to recognize how fortunate she is to live this lifestyle. Meanwhile, Renee Graziano is hoping to leave drama and negativity in the past. A cook-out at Karen’s house is just what she needs, even though both women realize that Karen’s daughter Karina is going to give them multiple coronaries. She’s way too pretty to be a teenager, but Renee hopes that Karen will allow Karina to mermaid model for her Mob Candy line. At least they can keep an eye on her that way.

Big Ang is recovering from throat cancer, and with her blonde hair, she looks like a boss. She is extremely grateful for her friends’ support during her surgery and following ordeal, but she credits husband Neil for being her rock. I love Ang, and I am thrilled to hear she’s cancer free (as the season airs, prayers are with her now). Her doctor touts an organic diet and exercise…oh, and she needs to quit smoking. It’s hard. Also difficult? Drita D’Avanzo’s household. She’s juggling having growing girls and her husband home from the clink. While she’s thrilled to have the balance of a normal family, she wants her daughters to realize how far she’s come. Drita takes them on a tour of the projects where she grew up so they appreciate the beautiful home and pool they are fortunate enough to have. She’s worked terribly hard, and she wants her daughters to appreciate the struggle she’s had to become the woman she is today. Of course, a book about her life is the next step in her empire…if she can convince her husband Lee that it’s not disloyal to their lifestyle. 

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dance moms wolves

After a mediocre first week of Dance Moms, Abby Lee Miller is trying to keep her crazy in check, but she’s really just in major denial.

After lectures on punctuality and dedication, Abby is running late. She needs her make-up artist to make sure her eyebrows look better. Jill recognizes this behavior as Abby being on the verge of a breakdown. When the ALDC convenes for the pyramid, Maddie and Kalani are on the bottom due to their absences. MacKenzie and Kendall round out the bottom row. Nia is in the third spot for managing JoJo’s hamster ball, and JoJo places second for actually dancing in the ball. Brynn is in the top spot for winning her solo. Abby grants her solos to Kendall, MacKenzie and Nia, snarking that their mothers think they are good replacements for Maddie. Melissa sticks up for MacKenzie at every turn (for the first time), and Abby doesn’t appreciate her new stance. In a twist, Abby makes the announcement that she’s going to start training a mini team of young girls who she hopes will redeem her name with her sub-par competition team. The mothers are less than thrilled with this news. 

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Cynthia Bailey

I’m going to admit something to y’all that I’ve kept a secret. After Porsha Williams’ altercation with Kenya Moore at the Real Housewives of Atlanta’s reunion a few seasons back, I’d soured on the Georgia peaches. I took a break, and I’m not going to lie, I didn’t miss them. 

However, when I heard the news that Kim Fields was joining the cast AND Sheree Whitfield would be back, I had to check it out…you know, for work. Since the first episode of this season, I have been hooked yet again. I don’t even miss NeNe Leakes! The drama has been insane, and I am still trying to figure out which women are true friends and who is throwing enough shade to fund an umbrella factory.

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Draya Michele & Orlando Scandrick at ESPY Awards

Talk about a story line (you realize this means there is going to be another season of Basketball Wives: LA, right?)! Of course, she has to actually be on the show to have a story line, and that’s up in the air for this multi-tasking diva!  Draya Michele has just announced that she is expecting a baby with Orlando Scandrick, her fiancé. I remember when the two announced their engagement as last season of BBWLA aired. Am I the only one who missed that these two got back together after a very public break-up? Apparently yes…and I work here. Yo-yo relationship, anyone? 

While the thirty-year-old reality star is already a mom to thirteen-year-old son Kniko, this with be Draya’s first child with the Dallas Cowboys cornerback. Orlando is the father to six-year-old twins Tatiana and Taylor from a previous relationship. Draya recently shared that the couple will be welcoming a son in late April evening out the sibling dynamic. Congratulations to the happy couple! 

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dance moms abby

Summer is over, the girls and their mothers are back in Los Angeles, and JoJo is on a hoverboard. It’s got all the makings for a dramatic (and extra-long, I’m sure!) season. That’s right, dear readers! Dance Moms returned last night, and Abby Lee Miller brought the crazy…which she promises has nothing to do with her upcoming absences. Please. Kendall hopes that the finished studio will be good for Abby’s soul…she can’t be hateful in this beautiful space, right? Melissa brags that Maddie isn’t in attendance because she’s filming a movie, oh, and she’s now Kalani’s legal guardian so the teen can dance with the group while her mother Kira gets married and gives birth. Timing, you know. Abby interrupts the clucking hens, and she is beyond peeved at their Nationals loss. She lectures her clearly defeated group of dancers about their recent humiliation as the mothers purse their lips and the girls fight back tears.

Abby declares a ban on any extra work. No music videos, no appearances, no auditions, just dance. JoJo’s mother points out the hypocrisy that Maddie is filming a movie. Jill screams about her loyalty and how Kendall was turning down jobs left and right, as Kendall bawls, pleading for her mother not to make things worse with Abby. Abby then declares all of her dancers on the bottom of the pyramid before introducing Brynn to fill the incredible void left by Maddie. Brynn’s mother Ashlee does the requisite amount of sucking up as the other moms sulk. 

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Kenya Moore

I hope our Reality Tea family is enjoying a wonderful holiday week, with full bellies, fuller hearts, and a snarky outlook for what reality shows have in store for us in 2016! Real Housewives of Atlanta has had a crazy season thus far, and it can only get more insane after the most recent installment. Proving that no housewives can take a vacation without horrific drama, the RHOA ladies getaway to Miami was anything but fun, restful, or relaxing. In fact, it was downright hard to watch thanks to Tammy McCall Browning’s nephew Glen losing his shiz and slamming his aunt to the ground while trying to get to Kenya Moore after she told him to leave. Tugging on a wig is one thing, but battery is anything but entertaining. Take note, Bravo! 

In her Bravo blog, Kenya espouses on the week’s episode with her own headlines, just in case you didn’t catch her theme. She begins, “MESSY–Many people accuse me of being messy. If you say something on a reality TV show with cameras recording you that you don’t want people to know about or ever repeat, don’t go on a reality TV show talking about people… Now that’s messy! You can call me messy, and at times I am. I own that. However, what I won’t do is look the other way when I see a potentially dangerous situation for myself, my friends, and cast mates.”

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Watch What Happens Live - Season 11

As y’all know, everyone’s favorite table-flipper was released from prison bright and early yesterday morning. Teresa Giudice was greeted by her family and a media presence usually reserved for a royal wedding. The Real Housewives of New Jersey star even got a sweet new ride out of the deal…I guess now that she’s served her time on all those bankruptcy fraud charges, she can go back to spending the money she claimed not to have!

After nearly a year in a minimum security prison, Teresa was certainly elated to be reunited with her loved ones, and her lawyer informed the crowd that the reality star had a “very emotional, very private” homecoming with Juicy Joe and her four daughters…and a camera crew from People magazine exclusively capturing the entire event for Tuesday’s print edition. He also asserted that Teresa wouldn’t be making any public appearances in the coming weeks. Yeah, and I’ve got some ocean front property in Arizona!

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kyle richards rhobh

Are y’all ready for tonight’s episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills? Taylor Armstrong returns to throw shade at Yolanda Foster (and what’s with the hats?), and Kyle Richards continues to traipse around Europe with her family, finding the perfect balance between remaining loyal to her husband and appeasing her sisters. She’s almost mastered it, don’t you think? 😉

Speaking of Kyle, she’s got her take on last week’s episode, and she’s spilling her feelings regarding her invitation, shun, and reinstatement as a guest at niece Nicky Hilton’s wedding. As for Lisa Vanderpump’s meddling and Ken Todd’s comments about her size, Kyle isn’t keen on what she watched, but she’s willing to let it slide. Ol’ Splits has been on this show long enough to learn that she can’t be talking smack in blogs…she’s working on her image!

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