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Lisa Vanderpump

Am I the only one who hoped that Jax Taylor, as douchey as he is, would have just pummeled James Kennedy on the Vanderpump Rules finale? For the love of SUR, Lisa Vanderpump, please don’t allow that hot mess back in the DJ booth next season!

It’s safe to say that Monday’s episode was deliciously predictable, with Stassi Schroeder and Kristen Doute crashing Villa Rosa to attend Katie Maloney and Tom Schwartz’s engagement party. Jax’s girlfriend Brittany Cartwright proved once again that she has more patience than the entire cast combined (times a million), and Scheana Shay and Adriana Madix are once again biffles…even if their reconciliation was a product of Scheana’s insecurities about being ousted by Stassi. All is right with the world.

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mob wives ang renee karen

What the hell, VH1? Were you trying to start a total riot among the Mob Wives on last night’s reunion? Before the final sit-down can begin, the producers decide to show unseen footage from the last six seasons in order to rile up all the women.

Karen Gravano is so enraged that I can barely make out a single word coming out of her mouth due to all the bleeping. Carla Facciolo finds Drita D’avanzo’s outtakes to be “sad lies,” and Renee Graziano questions whether she appears as angry on on-screen as Drita. Yes, she does. Drita opines about how the show was supposed to be about a great group of friends and women empowering women. Um, she knew this was going to be aired on VH1, right?

The set is staged as if the women are back at the warehouse meeting that Big Ang called earlier this season. Karen and Renee are first to be seated and they remember their initial animosity in the early seasons. I think it has something to do with rats and mobsters, but I can’t be sure. At least they’re cool now though, right?

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Dance Moms recap

The minis were back on last night’s Dance Moms, as was Abby Lee Miller’s unstable behavior. Maddie has been nominated for a People’s Choice Award, and Abby has managed to snag two tickets for herself. Jill whines to Melissa that the entire ALDC should be allowed to attend to support Maddie. Good luck with that, Jill! The veteran moms need to stay behind to insult the mini-moms and grill potential newbie Jeannie with her three dancing daughters Coco, Rihanna, and Kaylee. Jeannie has been personally invited by Abby, so of course the moms are immediately wary of her.

Luckily, Ashlee takes some of the heat off Jeannie by interrogating Melissa about Maddie quitting the team. A frazzled, eye-rolling Melissa is quick to deny the rumors, although she looks very much like the cat who ate the canary! Melissa swears that Maddie will never leave the ALDC, but she can’t even keep a straight face as she says it. Abby enters sporting her normal hot-rollered head, warning the remaining mini-moms about how amazing Jeannie’s daughters are in the dance world.

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jersey shore jenni snooki

I know I say it all the time, but I truly, truly mean it–I love those crazy kids from Jersey Shore. Perhaps when I was first watching it, my obsession (like most everyone’s I assume) stemmed from watching a drunken, orange, fist-pumping train wreck. Of course, the longer I tuned in to see their shenanigans, the more I realized I wanted to be included in those elaborate Sunday dinners with a fun (albeit crazy) group of actual friends.

To me, the most amazing part of the guidos and guidettes’ relationship is that they didn’t know each other before the show started, and the series turned them into genuine friends…it’s usually the exact opposite when you think of a reality cast, right? The show ended in 2012, and while the cast has gone on to new endeavors, they are often found supporting each other (well, most of them anyway). Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi and Jenni “J-Woww” Farley became quick besties during the six seasons of Jersey Shore and have gone on to share the joys of motherhood and marriage, not to mention spin-offs! Now Snooki, a mother of two, is celebrating her friend who is expecting baby number two with new husband Roger Mathews

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Below Deck Mediterranean

I’m not trying to wish away the year, but I am certainly ready for spring and summer. Luckily for me, the high today in Charleston is a sunny 80 degrees, and Bravo’s line-up is heating up as well! Not only is my guiltiest pleasure, Southern Charm (more on that in the coming days!), premiering on April 4th, Chef Ben Robinson is returning with a new crew (and a new locale) for Below Deck Mediterranean which starts on May 3rd.

Keeping with Bravo’s trusted boating formula of mixing hot crazy people and lots of alcohol in confined spaces, the fresh yachties will face hook-ups and high maintenance charter guests against the gorgeous backdrop of the Greek islands, including Santorini and Mykonos. Ben will be the only familiar face, and I’ll certainly miss Captain Lee, the Stud of the Sea, but I can’t wait!

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Big Ang's Cancer Is Back

Everyone is still mourning the loss of larger than life Mob Wives star Big Ang after she succumbed to cancer on February 18th. The series aired its last episode on Wednesday followed by a tribute to everyone’s favorite Staten Islander that I couldn’t watch…to the commenter who compared the tacky special to a budget New Year’s Eve spectacle, you couldn’t have made a better comparison.

That said, it was incredibly hard to watch Ang wrapping up her final scenes by revealing her cancer had returned and that she’d split from husband Neil Murphy. While Ang and Neil’s ups and downs were chronicled this season and on Couples Therapy, the pair showcased a hilarious and fun-loving side on Ang’s lighthearted spin-off. Regardless of their relationship status at the time of Ang’s death, Neil clearly loved his wife immensely, and he wants to make sure everyone knows how much he adored her.

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mob wives big ang

With every new episode of Mob Wives, we’re one week closer to the series’ end. It’s time, especially in light of the crushing loss of Big Ang. I find it’s even more time to call it quits when we get a brief preview of the ugliness to come later in the episode before VH1 flashes back to what leads up to the insanity. It’s Drita D’avanzo versus Karen Gravano as newbies Marissa Jade and Brittany Fogarty to go at it. Lovely. We’re transported back to two days prior as Karen, Carla Facciolo, and Marissa descend on Renee Graziano’s ballroom dance recital. If only the entire episode could focus on Renee’s lighthearted new hobby. Renee crushes it and is grateful for her friends’ support. 

Drita goes to check on Ang who is happy to be cancer free but still struggling through the recovery from her surgery. Drita then unloads on Ang about Karen talking smack about Marissa and her boyfriend and Karen and Drita and Lee and all the drama. Ang reveals that Marissa denies saying that Karen ever said anything, claiming that Drita has selective hearing. Drita erupts into a volcano of cursing and bleeping, and Drita and Ang agree that Karen, Marissa, Drita, and Brittany need to have a sit down. Ang can’t be sure, but if she had to guess, she thinks that Marissa is stirring the pot just a bit. God, I love Ang, but she’s holding the spoon here too, although I believe she has the best of intentions.

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dance moms maddie

Am I allowed to be excited when the Dance Moms sound technicians and producers are scurrying around the Los Angeles ALDC studio totally gobsmacked as to why Abby Lee Miller and the drama-loving mothers are nowhere in sight? The dancers are there, but they aren’t allowed to be filmed without their moms present. Ashlee and Brynn arrive and are confused as to why they are the only ones in attendance to meet with Abby. A producer reveals that the veteran moms are no-shows, and without them, the girls cannot be on camera. Abby cackles at the wonderful thought of not having to deal with the crazy. Abby has designated this week’s solos to follow the theme of famous L.A .murders. Brynn tries to be cheery as Gianna Googles “Black Dahlia Murder” to get the young dancer in character. Yikes. 

Trying to make a point about Abby’s recent shenanigans, the mothers decide to show up late wearing their pjs in a nod to their dance instructor’s erratic behavior. The mothers take issue with Brynn rehearsing sans the remaining ALDC dancers. Abby totally could have let the other girls dance…it didn’t have to be on camera. Ashlee tries to explain that she’s not the reason the girls weren’t allowed to participate, but Jill knows how to push her buttons. The more Ashlee fake cries, the more Jill screeches. It’s cringe-inducing. 

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