Krayonce is back in full effect…and twirl! Real Housewives of Atlanta's resident delusional fan-flinging star Kenya Moore is back in full force, and the Gone with the Wind Fabulous singer (that's singing she's doing, right?) is talking about Kanye West. Don't y'all know–Kenya was the one who got away!
While the world is talking about Yeezy's engagement toKim Kardashian, Kenya is going back to a time before the tiny rapper knew the bootilicious reality star. It was a simpler time. A time with fewer televised Kardashian weddings and more old-fashioned fans. At least, that's how I picture it.
So it seems that Kanye West has found his voice because the man cannot stop talking about getting married to Kim Kardashian. I mean, dude, I'm going to let you finish but I had one of the…nothing. I've got nothing. I think we are all going to have to let Kanye finish…and that means it could be a long time before he stops doing interviews about his engagement to the reality star. You know what, though? I'm fine with it. He seems to have quieted Kim for the time being, and I have a feeling that Kim is soon going to only know how to smile and nod like KateKatie Holmes when she was with Tom Cruise.
E! is dishing more on an interview Kanye gave on Monday morning–you know, the one where he discussed finding the perfect ring(s) for the elaborate engagement. He also addressed the dudes who plan on popping the question to their ladies after his Jumbotrontasticlove fest, saying, "I gotta apologize to the race of males for turning [it] up so much." He's far too kind. And humble. Surprisingly, the actual ceremony will be relatively low-key, with Kanye only teasing, "Two words: fighter jets."
Mob Wives'Big Ang knows a thing or two about plastic surgery…and vino! Having just released a new line of wines, the "bigger is better" reality star celebrated the launch of her latest venture with friends and family at–where else?–an authentic Italian restaurant in New York City.
Known for her cannonball sized boobs and lips and her role as the voice of reason on Mob Wives, Ang is versed in all things tattooed, tanned, and cocktail related. She is also doling out advice on romantic relationships, which makes sense when you think about it. I'm sure Prosecco served in a bottle decorated with kiss marks and animal print can get anyone in the mood!
Don't lie. You've missed the crew from Love & Hip Hop. Yeah, I know. I couldn't type that with a straight face any more than you could read it with one. With the Basketball Wives reunion kaput, VH1 treated us to the season premiere of a more yawn-inducing version of the feisty L&HH: ATL. While I'll try to reserve my judgment, I don't think that K. Michelle can save this sinking ship any more than the newbies. It's not that I don't like Yandy Smith and Mendeecees Harris, but they are almost too likeable. I didn't believe Rich Dollaz and Erica Mena's relationship was anything more than camera candy, so I never invested much thought in them, and don't even get me started on the dysfunction that is Tahiry Jose and Joe Budden. So, about that reservation of judgment promise…I'm not doing so well, eh?
With the Medicine Man still incarcerated, Yandy has continued to take Little Mendeecees during his dad's custodial times. Both she and Mendecees have decided to tell the boy that his father is serving time…in the army. I don't even have the chance to type how adorable this child is before Mona Scott Young goes and throws a curveball…she is totally exploiting Little Mendecees by having him share a secret with his soon-to-be stepmom. He reveals that he has known his dad was in jail for months.
It's been a big week for Kim Kardashian, y'all! Not only did she celebrate her thirty-third birthday, but she got engaged for the third time to tiny rapper Kanye West who finally made peace with Jimmy Kimmel (seriously, I am still laughing about that!). If that wasn't enough, new daughter North West debuted this week on Keeping up with the Kardashians. As you could expect, Kim kept it klassy for all of these events.
Let's begin with the show, shall we? Confession time…I. sometimes every once in a while rarely watch KUWTK. I'm not even that ashamed of it. In fact, I tend to find the majority of the family (read: Bruce Jenner, Kendall Jenner, Khloe Kardashian—who grates on my nerves like the remaining family members when I read stuff like this–and the Jenner boys) likeable on the show. The entire shiny E! klan is separate and different from the fame lovers I love to loathe in the 'loids. That said, Kim was just plain gross on this week's episode, and I don't give two flying flips about her third (and no, I don't think this one's the charm) wedding.
Last night was the event you've all been waiting for with baited breath. Yes, that's right. NeNe Leakes finally walked down the aisle and married her groom Gregg. Again. Thanks, Bravo, for treating us to two full hours of I Dream of NeNe. Two hours, really? I kind of wish you had dragged out her nuptials even longer. I do wish I'd played a drinking game with myself though and taken a sip every time some famous face was shown. I mean, in the first five minutes of the finale, NeNe lunches Vivica Fox while Gregg hangs with groomsman Al Reynolds! On second thought, I'd probably have gotten too drunk to type this…
Gregg is being fitted for his tux, and he's super nervous to learn that his suit won't be completed until the day of the wedding. What is with these Bravo wedding specials leaving everything for the last minute? It's been in the works for ages! NeNe is also helping her ill prepared aunt shop for something to wear to the wedding, as she arrived in Atlanta with nary a dress. Jennifer Williams is along for the ride helping NeNe with some last minute details with her family. Gregg bows out on his fitting to go meet Tony to check on the venue. The ballroom looks like a construction site as Tony and his team prep to hang 60,000 crystals from the ceiling. Somewhere, Spencer Pratt just got really excited!
The family is all coming together for a low-key celebration dinner, and it's nice to see NeNe and Gregg's adult children finally getting along. Gregg is precious with his step-granddaughter. Brentt seems thrilled at the prospect of a better relationship with his half-siblings, and NeNe feels content that all of the children have all come together. The following day, NeNe is spending time with her oldest son Bryson. She wants him to walk her down the aisle, but given that he's on crutches, she doesn't want her dress to get ripped. During their conversation, NeNe is sidelined by an e-mail from her father bailing on her big day. She can't believe he didn't have the decency to at least call her.
Just like with every reality show, we're slowly learning more and more about the men featured on Preacher's of L.A., and, of course, we're figuring out which ones we like and which ones tend to grate on our nerves a bit (or a lot!). As these men of God drive around in their Bentleys and Escalades and travel the globe with personal massage therapists and body guards, it's hard not to be a bit skeptical.
On the first episode, Bishop Clarence McClendon and gospel star Deitrick Haddon got into a heated discussion about the former's need for a massive entourage. Seriously, the man is one personal umbrella holder shy of being P. Diddy. Now, Clarence is hoping to clarify his points and clear up any misconceptions they viewers may have about him. It's rich, people (although not as rich as he is!).
I think we can pretty much credit MTV with the birth of reality television thanks to the explosion of The Real World, but it didn't stop there. Think about all of the families we watch on a weekly basis, from the Robertsons to the Kardashians to everyone in between. Where did the madness begin? Some may say with a ride on the crazy train courtesy of The Osbournes. Don't act like you didn't watch!
We saw Jack and Kelly Osbourne grow up on camera (although eldest daughter Amy didn't participate) with the always hilarious chirping busybody of a "mum" Sharon and bumbling, mumbling former death metal star Ozzy. And, of course, don't forget their tiny pooches! Now Kelly is a fashion consultant for E! and Jack is family man–how precious is his wife? (pictured with him and his parents above)–currently competing on Dancing with the Stars…but do they ever think about going back to the days of reality television's first family?