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rhoa

I know what y'all are watching on Bravo, that's for sure.  The ladies of Real Housewives of Atlanta continue to break records in their fifth season…with all the drama there is a reason RHOA is the network's most watched show!  Close your legs to married men, WIG!

The women of the Peach State are notorious for bringing the crazy both on and off screen, and we've watched several of them work their way up from practically nothing to be huge success stories.  Of course, it goes both ways with some of the former ladies living far above their means.  Whether they are decorating ginormous marble-ladden, diamond encrusted houses of tackiness, drafting friendship contracts or recording catchy songs (Gone with the Wind Fabulous, anyone?), the ladies of RHOA are totally addicting!

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The Real Housewives of New Jersey - Season 5

If y'all are anything like me, you're waiting on pins and needles for the premiere of season five of the Real Housewives of New Jersey.  Season four went out with a bang, so I can only imagine the drama that will ensue among Teresa Giudice, Jacqueline Laurita, Melissa Gorga, Kathy Wakile, and Carolina Manzo.  Thankfully, we only have to wait a couple more months, as the craziness starts on June 2nd!

As if you don't already know these ladies better than some of your family members, Bravo always likes to update the women's bios with all things bright and happy.  There is nary a mention of Posche fashion shows or strippers or a cousin Rosie meltdown.  You've got to love Bravo's positive spin!  In anticipation of the new season, let's re-introduce ourselves to the Jersey girls, shall we?  

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moms4

You never know which Abby Lee Miller you're going to get when you tune in to Dance Moms.  Will she be nice?  Excited?  Motivational?  Nah, she just loves stirring the pot, causing rifts between the mothers, and planning for the downfall of Cathy and her Candy Apples.  Perhaps she'll throw in some taxidermy along the way…

We begin, as always, with pyramid time.  Thankfully, the girls are coming off a big win at last week's competition.  Abby switches it up by starting at the top…and Maddie is right back where she's always been.  On the next rung is an excited PaigeKendall joins Paige for being third, which, according to Abby, is better than second.  Chloe is in the next spot even though she's been consistent with her top notch dancing.  Nia is first on the bottom for flying under the radar.  She's good, but not great.  MacKenzie follows with Brooke who didn't dance last week…per Abby's orders.  Abby shocks her troupes by adding Asia to the bottom of the pyramid as the newest team member.  Asia competed on Abby's other show, and Abby warns the mothers about running off another mom.

This week, the dancers are heading to Michigan, and Cathy and her Candy Apples will be in attendance.  The group number is called "Return to Grace," and it focuses on reincarnation.  MacKenzie and Asia will be sitting out the group number.  Kendall, Maddie, and Chloe will be dancing a jazz trio.  Asia is gifted the only solo.  As Abby works on the group number, the moms (especially Jill) are curious to see what the new mom will bring to the table. 

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4teen

What's better than one hour with Chelsea Houska, Leah Messer Sims Calvert, Jenelle Evans, and Kailyn Lowry?  Why two hours, of course!  Monday's Teen Mom gave us a double dose, and here's the recap for the second hour.  I'm almost as exhausted from writing about it as these chicks have to be living it.  Gracious!

The second hour begins after Leah and Jeremy's courthouse nuptials.  The couple can finally qualify for a joint loan on their dream home.  Due to the added expenses, Leah wants to ask Corey for more child support…because he should totally help pay her mortgage.  I kid, I kid, he needs to be supporting his daughters to the best of his ability.  Leah's heard through the grapevine that Corey has gotten a raise, so she calls him to see if he's willing to modify their agreement without going through the courts.  When he asks for her reasons, she offers up that he needs to pay more for the twins' clothing.  He's willing to discuss it when they meet to trade off the girls.

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teenm4

Last night we were treated to two marriage themed episodes of Teen Mom.  So as to not cause our readers to overdose on all things Jenelle Evans, Kailyn Lowry, Chelsea Houska, and Leah Messer Sims Calvert, we're splitting up the recaps.  It's just our way of letting our wonderful readers recoup from one hour of the train wreck to the next.  All in all, it was a night of proposals, weddings, and tears made in MTV heaven. 

Jenelle and Gary are back in full romance mode, and her roommate questions whether Jenelle truly loves Gary or if she just hates being alone.  Jenelle assures her that she isn't with Gary just because he's in the military and will make good money.  He's good with Jace, and she just doesn't have the energy to look for another relationship.  Jenelle admits that they both pick fights on purpose because they love the drama.  All of those are wonderful reasons to stay with someone, right?  Her roommate begs Jenelle not to accept any marriage proposals from Gary because the two clearly aren't ready to get married.  Jenelle can't make any promises.

Speaking of marriage, Leah and Gary really want to get a loan on their dream house, and they are considering getting married at the courthouse before their actual planned wedding ceremony.  She informs her mom of their plan, and her mom is fine with their plan.  Her mom wants her to tell Corey beforehand, but she's excited when Leah asks her to be a witness.  After chatting with her mom, Leah shares her early wedding plans with her sister.

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kandi

There is never a dull moment in Bravo's Watch What Happens Live clubhouse.  Andy Cohen has a way of getting his guests to chat about things they wouldn't otherwise talk about, but there are some reality stars that give him a run for his money.  Real Housewives of Atlanta's Kandi Burruss is always happy to converse with the Bravo patriarch, but she always keeps him on his toes.

Kandi has the ability to make fun of herself and tell it like it is without being catty while throwing other people under the bus.  It's no surprise that Kandi has a lot of opinions on her co-star Kim Zolciak and the lawsuit brewing between them regarding Don't Be Tardy for the Party.  However, Kandi is able to express her feelings without the cattiness that often rears its ugly head when stars are getting buzzed in the clubhouse.

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1lahh

I wish I could reach through your computer screen and pass you a tissue, because I know y'all are super upset that this season of Love & Hip Hop has drawn to a close.  Not surprisingly, the finale was all about two couples, with everyone else just showing up for a few quick minutes.  Perhaps VH1 should remember that less is more when it comes to casting…we can't get involved with eighteen different story lines!

Of course, last night starts off with everyone's favorite (hahaha!) plot.  Joe Budden has returned to New York, and he feels that his relationship with Tahiry Jose is unresolved.  Once home, Kaylin reveals that she's been nervous to hear about her boyfriend's vacay with his ex.  Joe shares that his feelings for Tahiry are beyond his control, and Kaylin wants to call it quits on her relationship with Joe…except that she doesn't have anywhere else to go.  When she asks their status as a couple, I think (I had to rewind three times) Joe said "Let us pray," but I can't be sure.

Also back in NYC is Tahiry, and she's meeting up with Rashidah Ali to rehash her stories from the Dominican Republic.  Forget about Tahiry's charity work or reconciliation with her father, Tahiry only wants to chat about Joe.  Rashidah is floored to learn that her friend may still be in love with Joe, and she's concerned that the two are moving in the wrong direction.  During the next commercial break Subway treats us to Tahiry waxing poetic about her charity work in the DR.  So, her conversation didn't make the actual show, but I guess this is better than nothing!

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Teresa_Joe_Giudice_PointHorrors

Joe Giudice has the utmost faith in our legal system!  The controversial "businessman" and husband of Real Housewives of New Jersey's Teresa Giudice hasn't always had the best luck with the law, and the couple has been riddled with rumors of Joe's cheating and major discord in their marriage.  While the pair has faced all of the gossip with fake smiles and denials, no one can dispute that Joe's record is anything but squeaky clean.

Throughout the past seasons of RHONJ, Joe's mouth has gotten him in all sorts of trouble, although his actions have also landed him in hot water.  He's been battling legal woes stemming from an identity theft case in which Joe allegedly falsely obtained a driver's license in his brother's name since his own license had been revoked.  Joe's court issues have been ongoing (the man loves rejecting a plea deal!), and it appears that there isn't an end in sight thanks to Joe's ego professed innocence.  Juicy!

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