First up we check in with the two roommates who won't be partying this season. A sober Mike is having one last giant meal with his family after returning from rehab for prescription pills. He claims to be the healthiest he's ever been, and I am happy to see Paula by his side. I think she's good for him. He says they're not quite dating, but they are close. What does that even mean? Meanwhile, a pregnant Snooki is excited to see the old gang, and wouldn't miss out on the experience just because for something as minor as expecting a baby. She's done a total 180 (is that what it's called?) and there won't be any meatball antics with her.
JWoww and Roger are now living together after her quick stint as roommates with Snooki for their spin-off. He isn't thrilled at the prospect of her heading back to the shore to party, but Jenni insists the couple is in a better place than last season. She's just waiting on that much anticipated engagement ring!
Knowing he wasn't really winning any popularity contests last season the Situation has decided he is going to prepare an elaborate Sunday dinner for when his roommates arrive. Snooki calls JWoww, and we learn that she hasn't spoken to Mike since last summer when he accused her (multiple times) of cheating on Jionni with him. She doesn't want any drama. Roger laughs…as if no drama was ever an option with this bunch!
I know I can be overly snarky, and I realize that sometimes my sarcasm is too much. However, I am being dead serious when I say that someone needs to intervene with poor Leah Shirley. The precious toddler has been the rope that Teen Mom'sAmber Portwood and Gary Shirley use to play their crazy game of tug-of-war, and it's so depressing. I don't doubt they both love their daughter with everything they have, but seriously, this is just too much.
The newest news from this pair stems from a "behind bars" interview that Amber gave to Dr. Drew Pinsky as she serves time for parole violations in an Indiana penitentiary. I mean, is this man even a real doctor? I saw a few episodes of "Loveline" back in the day, but should someone who used to pal around with Adam Corolla really be giving advice to incarcerated teenage mothers? What genius at MTV thought this was a good idea? These sad people aren't characters or cash cows, but yet…Sorry. I will step down from my soapbox now.
I'll be the first to admit that I finally took a stand on my feelings for Real Housewives of New Jersey'sTeresa Giudice after watching that horrid first installment of the reunion. Now I may be eating my words…just a bit. A very little bit. I still don't feel sorry for her, and I think I may keel over if I ever hear her utter the words "I was wrong" or "I lied." However, now I don't feel badly for any of them. They are all a bunch of fame whores as evidenced by the new Us Weekly cover story. You have to love that they're all wearing red. I guess they got Tre's devil memo!
You have to love the hypocrisy that comes with being a New Jersey housewife. One minute Jacqueline Laurita, Caroline Manzo, Melissa Gorga, and Kathy Wakile are calling out Teresa for hawking her story on magazine cover after magazine cover (after magazine cover!), the next minute they are gracing the pages of Us Weekly (high brow…no In Touch for these gals!) and bashing their former friend. Eye roll.
In a five page spread, the women spill all the details of their fallout with Tre. Now, I don't doubt for one second that Teresa is a textbook narcissist, but how is moaning about her in a national publication going to change that? Are these ladies actually expecting her to have some sort of epiphany and change her ways? Doesn't anyone know how to take the high road anymore? Geez. Build a bridge, people!
Um, we've got a Situation here. Man, typing that never gets old! Just in time for tonight's two hour Jersey Shore season premiere, news is breaking all over the place that Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino has fallen off the wagon. Sitch entertained us with his abs in earlier season, but as the guidettes and juiceheads gained international notoriety, he seemed to have difficulty handling the fame. In recent seasons, it was obvious that he didn't just love the booze.
I don't think anyone was shocked when Mike entered rehab for prescription pill addiction. It's going to be an interesting final season with the two biggest partiers out of commission due to Snooki's pregnancy and Mike's sobriety, although I am thrilled for both of them. However, now that Lorenzo has arrived and the show has seen it's last fist pump, will the Situation be able to maintain?
Sometimes, I wish I could say that the housewives were seasonal…like the olden days TGIF on ABC. You have a season, you move on to reruns, lather, rinse, repeat. Of course, Bravo and Andy Cohen have made sure that there are housewives for the viewers all year long. No hiatus. No break. All housewives, all the time. I can complain about it knowing that I'd be even more upset if it wasn't this way.
So let's commence…the Real Housewives of New York had their finale this week, which means we are going to be subjected to reunion upon reunion (although not upon THIRD reunion, as they haven't quite reached RHONJ status yet). Let's check in with my beloved drama-free New York (non) Housewife to see what she has to say about her freshman season with the Cramona. Ladies and gentlemen, Carole Radziwill….
My new, most favorite housewife ever in the history of housewives, Carole is dishing on her first foray into the drama. Now I realize that not everyone is a Carole fan. To that, I say, WHY NOT!?!? She is drama-free, full of class, and calls it like she sees it. I could only wish more women in this franchise came from the Carole school of thought. Truth be told, I want her to put on a bra and be my best friend. And we so would be.
I have been waiting on pins and needles to learn the darker side of Andrew Coleman! I don't think we even hit the tip of the iceberg with the most recent episode, but I can't wait to hear what y'all think!
Last night's Flipping Out resumes with Andrew schreeching out of the parking lot. Gage Edward enlists Nancy to help fill the gaps. He's very excited to see Andrew hit the road. Jeff Lewis is floored, and he's scrambling to figure how to take over the projects Andrew was handling. He really thought Andrew was an asset to the office, so he's confused as to what has happened. Zoila Chavez does her best impersonation of Andrew storming out which Gage finds hilarious. Too soon for Jeff though. Too soon.
Jeff questions Jenni Pulos as to whether he should have seen some signs. What else did Andrew lie to him about? Jeff seems be hurt that things ended the way they did, and Jenni tells him not to beat himself up over the situation. He declares he's going to start doing back ground checks and checking references. Too little too late for Andrew! Jeff reveals that he followed up with Andrew's resume after he quit and it was a total embellishment. Someone really wanted to be on Bravo.
Last week, we reported on what a great weekMatt Barnes was having, given his secret wedding and the fact he got off with some minor traffic violations after being charged with felony resisting arrest. Well, Matt didn't necessarily handle that great week with class. Who's shocked?
The officer that arrested Matt had previously stopped the basketballer twice before, so clearly the pair had history. The cop even waited outside the restaurant where Matt was having dinner with Basketball Wives LA'sGloria Govan for hours to arrest NBA player on suspicion of driving with a suspended license (he wasn't). When Matt tried to hand his keys to Gloria, the officer charged him with felony resisting arrest. Hmm…something tells me there is more to the beef between these two that meets the eye!
If y'all are anything like me, you are still reeling from the first installment of the Real Housewives of New Jersey reunion. Even though it was essentially four against one with Andy Cohen sitting there like a mannequin, I have totally switched gears. I may be the only person who now has no sympathy for Teresa Giudice. I mean, take some responsibility! Geez. I am getting hives just thinking about it.
However, there were some positives surrounding the reunion. What are those, you may ask? Just some narcotics and sky-high ratings, of course!