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heather dubrow house

Are y’all ready to see some house porn? They may have missed their March move-in deadline, but Heather Dubrow and husband Terry on the home stretch of finishing their dream mansion. Like the Real Housewives of Orange County couple, the home is small and understated, with just enough space for their family of six. And a hundred other people…and a tree…in the basement. I’m not positive, but I think their master bedroom is bigger than my entire house.

As furniture slowly but surely makes it way into the giant abode, dubbed Dubrow Chateau, the Botched star reveals he hasn’t been to the site in weeks. Heather insists her husband stay out of the construction phase because she doesn’t want his “constructive” (haha!) criticism. Of course, we’re sure to be treated to progress updates when the RHOC season debuts on June 20th. In the meantime, you can check out a video tour from Heather. I’m not going to say the rooms are so enormous that her voice echos, but…the rooms are so big her voice echos. 

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kathryn calhoun dennis and thomas ravenel pumpkin farm

For all of you who have speculated (on both sides) as to why Thomas Ravenel hasn’t taken Kathryn Dennis to court for custody of their two children (or, on the flip side, why Kathryn hasn’t sought financial support through a legal avenue), it’s all starting today. Yup. The estranged couple will face off in family court at a temporary hearing on June 27, but this afternoon, the judge will hear a motion to seal the case.

I try really, really (reallyreallyreally) hard when I recap Southern Charm to focus on the episode even though we’re watching events that took place several months ago. Drowning out what’s happening with these two in the here and now is just too tragic when I think of those precious babies. The pair have two year old daughter Kensington Calhoun and seven month old son St. Julien Rembert, and while I’m sure they have good hearts and good intentions (sometimes), neither seem to be skilled at being the bigger person.  

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southern charm landon shep

Southern? Without a doubt. Charming? Eh, sometimes more than others with these guys! On last night’s Southern Charmthe drama continued to focus on Thomas Ravenel and Kathryn Dennis with a little bit of Maury Povich mixed in for good measure.  After we witnessed the birth of the couple’s son St. Julien Rembert Ravenel last week, T-Rav’s friends, including JD Madison and Whitney Sudler-Smith, encouraged the playboy to make sure he was, in fact, the father, and Craig Conover, Kathryn’s biggest cheerleader, jumped on the bandwagon. Of course, we had to wait until the witching hour to see it, but wowsers…and next week? Don’t get me started! 

The episode begins with Cameran Eubanks calling Shepard “Shep” Rose about their partnerShep listing, but he’s busy taste-testing gin drinks at his bar, the Palace Hotel. Also getting an early start on the day is Craig who drops in on his former boss, Extreme Akim Anastapoulo. Akim finds it laughable to learn that Craig is in the hotel business. Not only did he spend three years in law school, but Craig graduated three years ago and still hasn’t taken the bar. The lawyer/Eye for an Eye star wants to hit Craig over the head with his Bat of Justice. He wonders how Craig will explain such a gap in his legal resume to future employers. Craig swears he doesn’t want to waste his education, and Akim begrudgingly agrees to help him get on the right path after he passes the bar. Something tells me this will Akim’s final cameo. Next time Craig seeks advice, Akim will send Kato Kaelin…or Big Sugar Ray.

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sister wives maddie

I’m going out on a limb here and betting that last night’s Sister Wives was longer than Robyn Brown’s actual labor. Baby Sister arrived last night, and Kody cites that Robyn is far more independent with this pregnancy than she was with Solomon. We are treated to highlights of Robyn’s frustrations with Kody over the last several weeks, and both agree that their emotional connection isn’t what it was with the last. Robyn has felt “off” the entire time, and she tends to listen to her intuition which worries Kody to no end. 

Baby Sister will be Kody’s eighteenth child. The family reminisces about firstborn Logan. He was born to Janelle after Kody had married his first three wives. Christine got pregnant not long after marrying Kody. Meri gave birth to Mariah a few short months after Christine gave birth to Aspyn. Madison came next, and Janelle had a difficult time producing enough milk. Maddie wasn’t gaining weight, so Meri stepped in to breast feed. As Kody’s brood got bigger, he felt more scrutiny from employers and customers. Many of Christine and Janelle’s pregnancies overlapped. While it’s a bit odd to think about, the family videos of the kids are adorable. 

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sister wives caleb maddie

Not only were we treated to another two hour mega-episode (baby sister arrived!) of Sister Wives last night, but this weekend was a special one for the Browns in real time. On Saturday, the eldest daughter of Janelle and Kody Brown tied the knot at a rustic, tree-house filled venue in Montana. Maddie’s relationship and engagement with Caleb Brush has been featured on the last two seasons of the show, often showing more common sense and reason than the all of the Brown parents combined. 

Of course, we know very few details of the wedding…except that it happened. TLC needs enough material to make it through one more season, especially if it plans to maintain these super-sized episodes. The wedding will be a nice compliment to the new baby and the catfishing

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Jules

With each passing week, I like Jules Wainstein more and more. I initially thought she’d be boring and vapid and care too much about the veterans’ opinions to voice her own. Sure, she may place a little extra emphasis on how much a stay at home mom needs a nanny, but she’s got a good sense of humor seems to know how to act right…a rare trait in this bunch.

After Bethenny Frankel went off (I mean, was all that vitriol really necessary?) on Luann de Lesseps, Dorinda Medley tearfully showed her loyalty to a birthday cake, and Ramona Singer played the voice of reason (was this the Twilight Zone or Real Housewives of New York?) on this week’s episode, Jules is giving her two cents on that awful girls’ weekend. Sonja Morgan should count herself lucky for being excluded!

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Rob Kardashian and Blac Chyna

In a turn of events that will surprise absolutely no one on this planet (literally, not one. Single. Person.), Kris Jenner someone has decided to capitalize on the awkwardness that arises when one’s son proposes to his pregnant girlfriend who also has a baby with said son’s teenage sister’s rapper (now ex) boyfriend. 

Seriously, if you didn’t see this one coming, you may want to consult a ophthalmologist. That’s right–after peacing out on his family’s show Keeping up with the Kardashians, Rob Kardashian has reappeared this season. And no, that’s not the news to which I’m referring. On the heels of this triumphant return to reality television, Rob and his fiance Blac Chyna have also garnered their own little series. Shocking, I know!

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Southern Charm recap

Last night’s Southern Charm proved that regardless of their jealousy, petty social media battles, and all-around dysfunctional behavior, Kathryn Dennis and Thomas Ravenel create some absolutely beautiful children together. Of course before we’re introduced to the new baby, we have to get through an episode’s worth of wealthy man-children (and Craig Conover) treating the world as their playground. After Shepard “Shep” Rose’s mountain weekend, it’s time for a big time for the boys on the west coast. In Los Angeles, Whitney Sudler-Smith is cooking breakfast for Larissa and they joke about Craig’s promise ring for Naomie.

Back in Mount Pleasant, Kathryn and Cooper Ray (welcome back!) are spa-la-la-ing at the Woodhouse Day Spa. God, I love a man in a custom bow-tie and a fluffy robe! Kathryn’s getting her first facial as she anticipates the birth of her son. T-Rav has been so attentive lately, and she’s hoping he’s coming around to the idea of being a family man. Cooper swoops in to deliver some much needed tough love. He reminds Kathryn that she’s fallen for this before, and she has to realize that Thomas is a fifty-year-old playboy. Sure, one day he may come to his senses, but she needs to focus on living her life and raising her precious babies regardless of Thomas’ behavior–good or bad. Preach! Kathryn recognizes that T-Rav went fifty years without having children, so she knows it has to be a tough adjustment. 

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