So, this may be one of those situations where both congratulations and condolences are in order, as another reality television baby entered the world while his parents battled back and forth about their relationship status…just as it was in the olden days. 😉
Last night, Love & Hip Hop Atlanta’sAlthea “Thi-Thi” Heart went into labor with her son, the namesake of boyfriend (ex-boyfriend?) Benzino. Baby Zino debuted this soon after, but not before ‘Zino, Sr. and Thi-Thi could engage in the requisite amount of drama and hospital selfies, all of which played out over social media. We can always count on you, No Neck, Benzino!
Last night’s Below Deck was setting the scene for quite an explosive finale, and I cannot wait. I am just sick about the season ending…one might say I’m seasick over it all. I am also sick-sick and popping antibiotics and fighting off a recurring fever, but it’s clear that there was no denying the heat between everyone’s favorite first stew and a chef whose eyebrows don’t scare the living bejezzus out of me! Let’s “dive in,” shall we? Raquel “Rocky” Dakota Bartlow needs a friend to talk to, so she finds Emile Kotze to tell him about her tryst with Eddie Lucas, and he’s not even sure how to respond? High five? Congratulations? He laughs bitterly and settles on,”I can’t believe he got it in and I didn’t.” She shares the juicy details (where, how many times, what it was like) and brags that she has evidence on her phone in the form of horny text messages from Eddie. She’s glad Emile is such a great pal who is willing to listen. I’m concerned Emile’s head is going to explode, but he remains loyal to his favorite tease. Speaking of teasing, Ben Robinson questions Kate Chastain about the lingerie she’s wearing, and she coyly details her lacy bra, admitting to going commando elsewhere.
The charter guests are two real estate moguls and their four pretty girlfriends (that’s right…four). Ben remarks that the women are gorgeous, and Kate manages an awkward smile. In the galley, Rocky tries to have some semblance of a normal relationship with Eddie, but he’s not having any of it. He’s beyond excited to be over with this charter. He’s never been more thrilled to get off a yacht. Not only is my once favorite bosun being unnecessarily mean, Eddie pulls a giant douche move and accuses Rocky of seducing him with the knowledge he had a girlfriend. No. Just no. Last time I checked, Eddie’s loyalty, not Rocky’s, was owed to his girlfriend. Later, he tries to tease Emile over breakfast, but Emile is livid at his superior for stealing his girl. When Eddie doesn’t get a reaction, he starts barking orders with Emile walking out mid-command. Emile and Connie Arias are snipping at each other as they ready the sun deck. A crabby Emile whines about everything, which Connie labeling him a “little bitch.” He retaliates by calling her a whore. He’s such a catch.
Last night’s Love & Hip Hop Hollywood was all about man power. The guys on this franchise have no issues with getting along, but the women? That’s another story! Now that Willie is out of his contract, he’s back in the studio, joined by Rich and Ray-J. Rich describes Ray as a one-man creep show which is epic. Ray jokes that he is excited to have some single friends, but wait! Willie has a wife and he needs to be a stand-up husband. Plus, Rich is dating Moniece, and Ray is worried that if he helps Rich stray, he’ll get stabbed. Ray wishes he was back with Princess so he could have a crazy girlfriend too. He doesn’t want to be left out. Meanwhile, Moniece and Fizz are successfully co-parenting Cameron. Fizz knows that Rich has met Cameron once, and while he’s happy that Moniece is happy, he needs to get to know the man who will eventually be spending more time with his son. Moniece understands where Fizz is coming from, but she’s worried that Rich isn’t going to be on the same page.
Miles has had a traumatic couple of weeks, but now that he’s come out to Amber and his family, he feels that a weight has been lifted off his shoulders. He hopes now to be able to mend his relationship with Milan. Milan has been dodging his calls, but he’s finally agreed to hear Miles’ side of the story. After speaking to Amber, Milan knows it must have been difficult to share his news with her, but it doesn’t make Miles’ lies any easier to swallow. Miles admits that he’s come out to his family, and he’s ready for them to meet. This revelation makes Milan very happy, and he’s appreciative of Miles’ journey.
Last night’s Sister Wives introduced us to Madison Brown’s now-fiance Caleb, and it teased us about next week’s finale that has Meri rehashing her catfish situation. There is certainly going to be plenty of fodder for the reunion! The family is heading off to Alaska for a vacation, and Logan and Madison are both taking their significant others. Logan reveals that he still plans on only having one wife, and his girlfriend Michelle jokes that she doesn’t plan on sharing her husband with anyone. Madison is head over heels with Caleb, and she admits that he has been interested in her since they first met when she was seventeen. Of course, due to their ten year age gap, he didn’t pursue her back then.
Kody and Robyn head to their sonogram appointment to find out the sex of the baby. The family’s consensus seems to be that Robyn is having a girl, but TLC needs to drag out the reveal for a story line. Upon arriving in Alaska, the kids are running around, and Garrison does the unthinkable. He complains that Kody and crew are too lenient with Solomon, comforting him when they should be disciplining him. Kody booms that he is the parent and he doesn’t need to Garrison criticizing his parenting skills. Garrison retorts that he wasn’t criticizing, he was advising. Kody doesn’t like being called out by his son…who is right, by the way. Logan is concerned that his giant family is going to overwhelm his poor girlfriend.
Finally. Last night was the season finale of Don’t Be Tardy, so we had to bid farewell to chef Tracy. Don’t cry. It’s Bravo. She’ll be back. They’ll all be back. That said, if Brielle gets a job at E! News, I officially give up…on everything. Plus, I have a big birthday coming up, and every time I watch this show and remember that Kim Zolciak Biermannclaims to be is a few years younger than I am, I want drown my sorrows in some of her sparkling raspberry moscato. If you’ve had it, you know how badly this realization is for me.
The episode begins with KJ and Kroy building a kite. Kroy is heading off to camp with the Falcons which makes KJ the f$%#&* head of the household. KJ has it covered. He plans to chain Brielle in her room for at least a week. Smart kid. Meanwhile, Brielle and Slade are debating how much a ton weighs, and Kim and Kroy are taking the couple to Kim’s favorite psychic, Rose, so they can figure out the future of their relationship. Kim loves the psychic so much, Kaia’s middle name is Rose. Rose predicts that Brielle will have three kids, a wonderful husband and good fortune…and it’s starting next year. Rose reads Slade’s palm and also sees a marriage within a year. Slade jokes that it will be a really tiny ring then.
“Take a picture, trick, I’m on a boat, b*tch; we drinking Santana champ, ’cause it’s so crisp. I got my swim trunks, and my flippie-floppies; I’m flippin’ burgers, you at Kinko’s straight flippin’ copies.” This Lonely Island song is perfection. No seriously, take a picture. Take one million pictures…and post them all on Instagram! And those copies of which you sing, are they perhaps copies of friendship contracts? Last night’s Below Deck epitomized Bravo’s love of a crossover. Forget the Bailey Agency and wild rice, Real Housewives of Atlanta’sCynthia Bailey was all about the Eros!
After the fire that ended Eyebrows McEgo’s reign in the Eros kitchen, chef Leon Walker is out, and Ben Robinson is back in the galley…and in the opening credits! As the crew gets ready for their latest charter, Ben gets all judgy about Leon’s science experiment he called a refrigerator. Connie Arias is all googly-eyed over Ben, but he’s too busy throwing away rotting vegetable to notice. On deck, Eddie Lucas is thrilled to see Dave from season one, and he’s just as adorable as I remember. He’s saving up for his wedding to his equally precious boyfriend, and Captain Lee Rosbach can’t hide his glee at the new addition. Dave is introduced to Kate Chastain, Amy Johnson, Emile, Koutze, and Rocky “Raquel” Dakota Bartlow. Someone quick tell her he’s gay before she tries to make him her next victim!
Last night’s Love & Hip Hop Hollywood begins with Amber on her mission to get dirt on Miles, storming into Milan’s studio’s session. He hasn’t spoken to Miles in weeks, save a few texts, and he’s ready to confront Amber about her relationship with Miles…as she wants to do regarding his. Milan breaks the news that the pair have been dating for two years. Amber is floored. Two years? She admits that she’s hurt and upset, and he reveals that he’s been urging Miles to be honest for ages. Milan shares that Miles claims Amber is a friend who can’t distance himself from his clingy pal. He’s even been fronting Miles the money he’s lent to Amber. This news is an extra blow, and Milan can’t help but feel sorry for her. She counters that had Miles been honest, she would have been friends with both of them…as a couple. The one time adversaries end the conversation with a hug.
Omarion and Willie are shooting hoops and talking music. Willie requests Omarion’s guidance with the independent label contract he’s trying to skirt. Omarion can sympathize, but it’s a rite of passage that can lead to great success. Willie needs to hustle in any way possible to reach his goals. Willie understands, but he’s worried he’ll lose Shanda’s support if he’s unable to get out of his contract. Meanwhile, after her emotional exchange with Fizz, Moniece is wondering why her mother is trying to sabotage her relationship with Rich Dollaz. Like Fizz, Rich is confused as to why Marla is on a rampage against her daughter, but he’s even more confused as to why Moniece doesn’t want to know her mother’s motives. Moniece goes from calm to crazy, breaking down in Rich’s arms.
So now that Kody Brown has adopted wife Robyn’s three children from a previous marriage, what will be the focus of Sister Wives going forward? Oh, I know! Let’s send the kids to spend a few weeks with their biological father! Robyn is concerned about the trip, and she hopes they have a positive experience. Dayton and her two daughters are very excited, although they admit they haven’t seen their biological father for two years. Kody reveals that in the past when the three have been to visit him before, they come back a bit different…a tad detached from the Brown family. It’s a good thing Kody and Robyn made sure they were Browns before leaving.
Since the adoption hype is over, the Browns fall back on their regular party planning plot. They are hoping to throw an adoption soiree to celebrate the three newest Browns. Kody is meeting with his wives, and Meri questions the food being served. He wants barbecue, but Robyn wants something more along the lines of Sunday dinner. Janelle nods her head in approval to pretend she’s paying attention, and Christine giggles wide-eyed at everything discussed like she’s watching a ping pong tournament. Her meds are great! Kody interrupts to say he’s getting chicken wings and meat, but Robyn attacks. She has white linens and floral arrangements–this isn’t going to be a cook-out. Kody hasn’t placed the order yet, but Robyn is won’t listen. She lays into Kody as her fellow wives join her in ganging up against him. Christine loves the camaraderie of the wives in an alliance against Kody. He urges them to get their panties out of a wad, and Janelle gives Robyn an mental high five for jumping all over him for that comment too.