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They’re ba-ack!  After Jill and Kendall studio hop from the Candy Apples, they head right back to Abby Lee Miller.  This should be good!  It’s just another dramatic night in the lives of the Dance Moms.

Holly is late for the pyramid reveal.  Abby isn’t happy about that, but she’s happy the girls did so well at their last competition.  Before Abby starts peeling off copy paper from the girls’ glossy pics, Jill swoops in begging for Kendall to have spot back with the troupe.  Maddie seems giddy.  It’s clear, once again, that the girls adore one another while leaving the cattiness, jealousy, and competitiveness for their crazy moms.  Abby won’t hear any of it at the moment.  I am getting a very scripted vibe, and I’m disappointed that Lifetime is fancying itself a less slutty version of VH1.  Jill brings in Kendall with her own 8×10 glamour shot to add to the pyramid.  Abby pretends to be floored.  She reminds the girls who are hugging Kendall that if they want to be friends with her they should invite her over for a good old fashioned sleepover.

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emily-maynard-engagement-ring-chris-harrison

Panda Kitty and One F Jef can finally share their love with the rest of the world.  Now that Jef Holm has proposed to Bachelorette Emily Maynard, we can start speculating on the future of their relationship and the future of the franchise.  I know I’m in the minority, but this was my favorite season yet.  I thought Emily was no nonsense in following her heart, and I wish Jef could be cloned…although I wouldn’t mind settling for Arie Luyendyk, Jr. either.  Of course, this is coming from a girl who likely watch a show that featured Chris Harrison reading from the phone book–dramatically (as if there is any other way).

Not only did Emily score a good man, she also got quite the ring finger candy.  Retailing at more than $150,000, the Neil Lane doorknob is reportedly the biggest and most expensive rock in the history of the show.

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It is always nice to have something positive to share, and it’s even better when that news is about Teen Mom Amber Portwood.  It’s not often we hear good news about this troubled reality television star.

It seems that her decision to choose jail over rehab was the right one.  Her brother believes that the structure of prison is really helping Amber stay on the right track.  She is sober and excited to start classes towards her GED.  He says, “She enjoys being up before 7 a.m., which is pretty hard to believe!”

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There’s some good news and some bad news for some of the gang from Jersey Shore.  Somebody is getting sued and somebody is going to be an uncle!

Bad news first…Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino is being sued by a Florida company called Performance Brands for failing to promote its fat-metabolizing cream.  The company claims that they fronted the reality television star $75,000 to endorse the product via social media and personal appearances.  However, as soon as Sitch got paid, he checked into rehab for his prescription drug addiction.

TMZ reports that the company is none too happy that Mike failed to perform his contractual obligations, especially since he originally lied about where he was going.  Performance Brands wants all of its money back since he failed to disclose his drug addiction.  Mike, of course, is firing back with his own law suit, alleging the company failed to provide him with the promotional materials necessary to fulfill his duties.

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Buckle up!  Last night was yet another crazy episode of Love & Hip Hop Atlanta.  I am really going to miss these ladies when the season ends.

We start–where else?–with Joseline wearing the most ridiculous “outfit” for a photo shoot.  She looks like a mermaid Beyonce in drag.  There is a lot going on to say the least.  Stevie J. arrives and he’s not feeling her ensemble.  Perhaps he wants her to dress more patriotic like himself.  He immediately goes off on her for texting his baby mama.  She has a name!  I mean, how hard is it to say, “Did you text Mimi?”  Joseline calls Mimi Faust a b*tch, and Stevie doesn’t like her disrespecting his family.  He storms out of the photo shoot.  Joseline goes back to her posing.

Momma Dee and Shay meet for lunch.  Shay knows she needs to tread lightly and get on Momma Dee’s good side so she can grow her relationship with Lil’ Scrappy.  Momma Dee is very happy that her son is with Shay, and she warns Shay that she may have to check Erica Dixon at some point.  She says they can either act like ladies or handle it with some gangsta sh**.  I have a feeling Momma Dee hopes it’s the latter.

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American Idol winner Jordin Sparks has stepped out with a rocking new figure thanks to diet, exercise, and good old fashioned hard work.  The star has recently lost fifty pounds!  How did she do it?  She entirely changed her diet and lifestyle, implementing new strategies to make sure that the pounds just melted away.

Jordin touts cutting out her Starbucks cravings and late night snacks, and swapping out sugary drinks and treats with healthier options.  She also swears by portion control and not eating within two hours of going to bed.

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On last night’s Big Ang, we were treated to house parties and dog shows, with a little emergency care mixed in for good measure.

Ang takes Louis to be groomed.  He is adorable, but he turns into a little gremlin when they put the hairdryer on him.  He’s trying to bite people left and right.  Ang needs Louis to be a beautiful pooch because she’s planning to enter him in a dog show.

Janine was able to get Ang her dream house, but moving and Big Ang don’t get along.  Lil Jen is helping her get settled, but her stuff seems to be multiplying.  As Jen says, Ang has enough furs to start a zoo.

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Oh Vicki Gunvalson…I just don’t know what to say.  You’re so business savvy, and while I’m glad that your love tank is finally full, I continue to question your choices.

After an explosive two part Real Housewives of Orange County finale followed by an even more intense two part reunion, the relationship between Vicki and her Cajun beau Brooks Ayers is more front and center than it has been–and we all know it’s been pretty front and center.  Vicki talks to Bravo about the tumultuous season, and she seems to play down the drama.  Um, we were all watching!

Vicki tells Bravo, “I’ve been on the show for seven great years, and each season has had its ups and downs.”

Of watching in real time Vicki insists, “[I]t’s still interesting for me to watch the show with everyone else,” stating, “[M]uch of what you don’t see is the quieter moments, how much I love just being at home and enjoying time with my family. I have to laugh, it makes for boring TV, but I love those quiet times too!”

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