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On last evening’s Dance Moms: Miami, the insanity really took a turn.  Susan’s antics threaten to ruin Jessi’s home at the studio, and Debi will turn on anyone to stop others from turning on her.  Victor, Angel, and the kids (oh, and of course Kimmy’s mom Ani) are the only ones not riding Ozzy’s crazy train.

The dancers did an amazing job at last week’s competition, and while Victor and Angel are very proud, there is always room for improvement.  After their most precious little duet, Lucas and Kimmy are in the first and second spots on the list, respectively.  Victor touts Jessi’s solo as “phenomenal” but she’s third for getting a lower score than the two nine year olds.  Susan is peeved.  Her daughter is the best dancer at Stars!  Sammy is fourth on the list for not standing out enough.  Even though Hannah wins her age group, she’s last on the list because she cried before going on stage.  Hannah believes that she just needs to work harder.

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We were introduced to Sarah Roberts on last night’s 16 and Pregnant, a sixteen-year-old from Chickamauga, Georgia.  She is super close to her mother, and she lives with her mom and two brothers.  Sarah met her boyfriend Blake in the sixth grade, and they have been dating on and off for five years.  She had aspired to go to college and study journalism, while Blake dreams of being a shrimp boat captain.  Sarah’s mom Tina and Blake don’t get along, but of course she lets him move in once Sarah gets pregnant.  He’s a high school dropout, and Sarah’s mom doesn’t like how disrespectful he is or how he treats her daughter.  Blake doesn’t like following Tina’s rules, and Sarah wonders how long he will stick around in Chickamauga.  Blake thinks he could make more money shrimping in South Georgia.

Sarah’s mom does her make-up every morning.  Tina is concerned that once the baby is born the couple will take off to South Georgia.  At a doctor’s appointment, Blake seems very uncomfortable.  Sarah tells her midwife that she will be going to school online, while Blake mumbles something about getting his GED.  Blake has promised to pick up a crib from Sarah’s aunt, but he’s busy…playing video games and hanging out with his friends.  Tina warns Sarah that he’s only going to get worse once the baby is born.  Blake confides in a friend that he just wants to have fun until the baby is born.  The whole conversation has subtitles.  Thank goodness I’m Southern.  I have no problem understanding what they’re saying, which is awesome because it means I can keep typing instead of trying to decipher their backwoods twang.  The ever classy Blake reveals that he is so sick of Sarah’s mother, he is sometimes just tempted to pay child support and be done with it.

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This season of Basketball Wives has got to be almost over, right?  I mean, I don’t know how much more I can take of these women.  Just a forewarning, this post is more emotional than I tend to be, just because I was beyond disgusted at what I was watching.  I used to really enjoy watching these women.  Where did things go wrong??

Tami Roman is still going off on Kesha Nichols.  Kesha is staying cool, while Tami continues to remind Kesha that she told Royce Reed and Suzie Ketcham she wanted to go off on her.  Kesha walks away and tries to remain calm, as Tami confiscates her pocketbook and refuses to relinquish it until Kesha returns to put her in her place.  Do you kiss your kids with that mouth, Tami?  Tami seems to be mad that Kesha doesn’t know where she comes from, but it’s time to put that excuse to rest.  Tami apparently doesn’t seem to care that Kesha comes from a background where people don’t b!tch slap one another and hold handbags hostage. I want to smack (not really, as I’d be stooping to their level) Shaunie O’Neal, Evelyn Lozada, and Suzie for not intervening.  When Kesha walks away, the other women think that Kesha should have spoken her mind.  Shaunie even laughs that Tami is really going to keep her bag and sunglasses.  Tami, you are a grown woman, and you should be ashamed of your behavior.  Sixth grade bully.

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They won’t go away, so I am doing my best to embrace them.  Who am I kidding?  Given the allergic reaction I seem to be having, that must mean it’s time for our daily dose of Dash.  First up?  A glorious baby shower hosted by Queen Bee Kris Jenner.

As you know, Kourtney is bringing yet another Disick Kardashian into the world, and her mother graciously hosted a soiree this past Saturday to toast the impending birth of Kourtney’s daughter.  Life & Style reports on the event.  I’m sure of course we’ll all get to see it when it airs on one of their many reality shows.  These folks don’t do anything without cameras present, right Ray J?

A source tells the magazine, “Kourtney’s shower was so nice!  Her mom and sisters were there, of course. They talked, laughed, and played games. There was a bar and lots of different types of foods and desserts, including sushi and little sandwiches.  She seemed happy and excited earlier in the day before the shower. Her son, Mason, was there, too.”

“Lehr & Black did Kourtney’s shower invitations,” adds another ‘insider’ citing, “They were beautiful.”

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Cabs are heeya!  And they are taking those crazy kids from Jersey Shore back to the beach!

Wetpaint.com is reporting that they’re back for yet another go-round with the twin beds, astro turf roof, and duck phone.  A source from the guido hit reveals that the cast is gearing up to head to Seaside Heights where they will begin filming the new season on May 21.  As they will film through July, Snooki will be close to popping out that little meatball, seeing as she’s due in August.

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Last night was the season finale of Mob Wives, and one never knows what is going to happen with this rowdy group of women…especially since there’s a dreaded meeting between to women who have a penchant for beating the poo out of each other.

Renee Graziano and Drita D’Avanzo meet for cocktails to discuss everything that has been going on in their lives.  Drita relays the news that Lee will not be transferred to a prison in Brooklyn.  Renee outlines her father’s plea deal, and she is relieved that the other people that Junior affected didn’t get much time.  Renee has also scheduled the meeting between Drita and Karen Gravano for the following day.  Drita is willing to go so the pair can move forward, but she doesn’t want Karen rehashing the past.  Good luck with that!

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Last night was the two hour finale of Survivor, and it’s a battle among the last ladies standing.  Jeff Probst recaps the season’s highlights, including Colton Cumbie’s rise to power and prompt demise and the ladies’ ultimate come back.

It’s the thirty-sixth night on the beach, and the women have voted off the last man.  Alicia is very confident in her friendship with Kim, but I think she may be tooting her own horn a tad too early.  The following day, Sabrina and Kim collect the tree-mail.  Kim approaches Sabrina about voting off Chelsea next, as she’s worried Chelsea will garner lots of jury votes.  While she plays cool, Sabrina is shocked that Kim is targeting her best friend because she’s popular with the castoffs.  However, it does make the likeable Sabrina wonder if she’s next on the chopping block.  No one is worried about the jury voting for Alicia and Christina. I have now decided I either want Chelsea or Sabrina to win.  Only took me an entire season to make that wishy washy determination…

The immunity challenge is pretty intense.  After untying several knotted ropes to get through a makeshift gate, each player must race along a balance beam maze, and must start back at the beginning in the event they fall.  After the maze, they will traverse a giant rope net collecting bags of (what else?) puzzle pieces.  The assembled puzzles will give three number clues the women must use to unlock a combination which will free their flags.  Christina is the first out of the gate, followed by Kim.  They are also the first to fall off to start again.  Alicia finishes the maze first with Chelsea right on her heels.  Chelsea is the first to collect her bags, but everyone is neck and neck on the puzzle.  Sabrina falls behind, but Kim and Chelsea are neck and neck.  Kim assembles her puzzle first, followed by Alicia.  Kim can’t get her combination right, and after multiple tries, she returns to the puzzle.  Alicia follows suit.  Kim, Chelsea, and Alicia are all up working on their combinations at the same time, and Kim finally gets it right, winning immunity.

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Wow, wow, and wow.  I didn’t think it would happen, but it looks like all the discord with Basketball Wives may be coming to a head.  There is a petition circulating to have the show taken off the air, and there is rarely an episode that doesn’t end in a violent smack down.  Bullying abounds.  The women act like fools while preaching to their “friends” how they take the high road.  Y’all know…you’ve seen it!  Well, in a recent interview with TheDailyBeast.com, Tanya Young Williams of Basketball Wives:LA, shares her experience on the show…which she describes as hellish.  While she says she’s never watched the original ladies of Miami, she reveals that her time working for Shed Media was horrific.  Highlights of that interview are below, but you can read the whole thing here.

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