Last night it was V-Day for Mimi Faust and Nikko on Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta, and of course, by “V” I mean Vivid! The pair’s sex tape was released, and Mimi is beside herself as to how this will effect her daughter later in life. At least her acting is getting better!
Mimi takes Eva to Stevie J.’s so she can figure out her next move. Poor Eva doesn’t have much going for her in the parent department, but she sure is a cutie pie, and she’s good at remembering her lines! Mimi reiterates once again that she’ll be able to provide for her daughter’s future, and while it may not be the best way, it’s HER way. Stevie gives the same speech about how he’s being the best dad he can be while jumping with Eva on a jump castle. I guess jump castles trump child support…
Joseline Hernandez is channeling her energy into a boob-fueled shopping spree. She is still planning a getaway where she can whoop it up with K. Michelle. What happened to her new show? Joseline calls K. Michelle to complain about her marital woes, and K invites her to New York to forget her worries for a while. K. Michelle reminds her that New York would be a great place to make more connections for her music, but Joseline is more focused on meeting men for pleasure…not business. Don’t call it a crossover. It’s a girls’ weekend! Woo hoo!
Hey! Remember on last week’s Sister Wives when Kody got showered in waste at the RV park? Good times for sure! The Browns are on their way across country to meet a Christian polygamist family whose faith isn’t rooted in Mormon principles. This guy is living Kody’s dream. He once got his wife to bake for him and then complained while she was baking that she wasn’t available to cuddle. What will remedy that? Another wife! Who is this guy and how stupid are his wives?
Kody is sporting a fancier version of his usual denim button down. It’s got embroidery on it. Christine is a bit wary about driving across country to meet a family they don’t know. Janelle is happy to mingle with like-minded people. In the dark of night, the families meet, and Kody is beside himself trying to impress the cool Nathaniel Richard and his wives. From what I gather, he only has two wives. They admit to living a secret life, but the Richards share that there are a lot of plural families living in Missouri.
The Richards kids channel their best Sound of Music as they march their way through roll call. The families share a Passover meal where they celebrate (?) beasts and boils. Nathaniel is only thirty-three, and the Brown wives remember just how bright-eyed and idealistic Kody was at his age. From what I gather, the Richard family won’t be getting a spin-off any time soon. They aren’t hip even by Meri standards, and one of the wives is sporting a straight-up banana clip. Someone get this lady a scrunchie so we can at least bring her into the early 90s!
I don’t even know where to begin with this situation…seriously! What would you rather read about first? Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino’s mom fist pumping…into her son’s face? How about Sitch bouncing checks like he used to get bounced out of clubs in Seaside Heights?
Well, let’s start with the good news, shall we? There is love in the air for the former Jersey Shore playboy. While co-stars Jenni “J-Woww” Farley and Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi are set to walk down the aisle soon, Mike is finally thinking about settling down as well. Sorry, ladies! Forget DTF, the Situation is DTM…Down to Marry!
It seems that a post-rehab Situation has reunited with his college sweetheart. Clearly, he met her years ago, since he was pushing thirty when the show started. Having given up his hard partying ways, he has been back together with Lauren Pesce for a few months now, but that’s enough time for Sitch to start hearing wedding bells.
If the Kardashian girls are famous for anything, it’s for famewhoring and a golden shower sex tape their strong work ethic and the sense of power they try to instill in other women. At the forefront of their empowerment movement is mom Kris Jenner, and, according to Kim, Kourtney, and Khloe Kardashian, she’s been their best role model as a business woman.
The sisters will slap their names on anything that stands still long enough, be it dolls, clothing, or make-up. They are entrepreneurs, y’all. Kim doesn’t even care much about the reality shows as they are just a marketing vessel for the Kardashian brand. She’s a damn evil genius, isn’t she?
I don’t know about y’all, but I am still in awe of the fact that Vicki Gunvalson was the voice of reason on Monday’s episode of Real Housewives of Orange County. Next week is sure to be a doozie, right? While it was equal parts awkward and painful to watch the scenes with Shannon Beador and husband David as he vocalized with brutal honesty how hard their marriage is, it was actually pretty real for Bravo reality. At least Shannon has learned to be weary of Tamra Judge and her dealings with Heather Dubrow.
Of this week’s show, Shannon starts, “Aloha from Hawaii! I am so happy that you finally get to see what is the beginning of a turning point in my marriage! What starts out to be a tough episode ends with hope for healing in my marriage and I am truly grateful for that!”
Shannon writes, “I probably had one of the most emotional weeks of my life after David sent me the infamous email. Typically I am a pretty strong and secure person, but you can see that I have become insecure, especially about my marriage. Brooks had some great advice at dinner by saying to forget the past because I have to focus on my future and my marriage,” adding, “Going dancing at Andeles was exactly the right prescription for David and I. As much as I love for David to be ‘fun David,’ David also loves it when I am fun. I can be quite crazy and have danced on my fair share of stages and tables when I have been out with David or friends. I’m glad you get to see that. What I am not so proud of, however, are my not-so-pretty dance moves. Yikes!” Yikes is right.
Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta was at the top of its game last night. From Benzino acknowledging that he’s a bit neck deprived to a fight that we didn’t get to see, peppered with some of the best one-liners we’ve heard in a while. It was awesome.
The episode starts with Kalennaand Ashley tearing it up at the strip club. Of course it does. Kalenna has been shirking her recording duties, but Ashley’s getting super possessive about Kalenna focusing on anything other than her. Ashley has even stolen Kalenna’s phone so her husband can’t contact her. When Ashley finally allows Kalenna to call Tony, she’s over their fun times. Kalenna needs to get back in the studio. Also focusing on her career is Tammy Rivera who is hosting a fashion presentation to celebrate the launch of her new clothing line. Both Rasheeda Frost and KarlieRedd are in attendance, and WakaFlocka Flame couldn’t be more proud of his fiancee. I so wish he got more air time! While we aren’t treated to many of her pieces, what I see I really like. Tammy even agrees to elope with Waka instead of having a big wedding.
Porsha's latest endeavor is a far cry from the demure persona she portrayed on her freshman season. Y'all remember that Porsha, right? Taking a page out of her nemesis Kenya Moore's playbook, Porsha has decided to turn up the sex appeal with a new lingerie line. Bless her heart.
Oh y'all. Last night's Sister Wives was the vacation from hell! Can you imagine trekking halfway across the United States with Kody Brown at the helm of your RV? Would you rather ride shotgun if Meri or Robyn were driving? Even Janelle and Christine seemed to be a bit weary about the two RVs and a twelve passenger van. All of this chaos to meet some Christian polygamists. The teenagers are upset about missing spring break with their friends, and Kody is going from house to house trying to pack his stuff. Before heading out of town, Kody's hair leads a business meeting for My Sister Wives' Closet. Robyn is irritated that the investors have yet to fund their business. It's been eight weeks since they were promised the money. What's the hold up? How are they going to pay to rent the RVs? Everyone seems to be dreading this vacation. Even Kody admits to feeling anxious.
Somehow, Kody has convinced his niece Cindy to join the crew–and drive! Is she being punished for something? Meri will also be behind the wheel. Kody is believes his teenagers are going to make or break the trip. The responsible college aged kids are off the hook and won't be traveling with the family. Kody is worried. Without Mariah, Aspyn, Mykelti, and Logan, who will actually watch the younger kids? Christine joins him in his concern. Is she going to have to watch her younger kids now? The family is only an hour behind schedule as Kody barks orders at children who aren't listening to a word he says. I'm getting stressed out by this trip already and they haven't even left the cul-de-sac compound yet!