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southern-charm-whitney-sudler-smith

Say what you will about Whitney Sudler-Smith (I certainly do!), but regardless of how sinister he’s coming across on the second season of Southern Charm, he’s pretty funny (even if we’re sometimes laughing at him and not with him). I think there is a lot about his life that we don’t get to see on the show. Whitney is clearly a talented film maker, so the silver spoon that seems constantly lodged in his mouth can’t be a permanent fixture. He has to work hard. We all know he’s the creator of my guiltiest Bravo pleasure and is a producer of the series.

Given that fact, Whitney has to know how he’s being portrayed…heck, he’s likely writing his own script! It’s a bit intriguing (and dare I say, endearing?) that he’d poke enough fun at himself to be the requisite villain. Y’all know I stalk them at any opportunity (I have a few grainy cellphone pics of a white jean clad Whitney waiting at a crosswalk…restraining order, what?), and I’ve been known to approach members of the cast when I see them around town. The one time I fan-girled Whitney, Shep Rose, and Cameran Eubanks at lunch (off season–they truly are friends), all were incredibly kind and cordial, but Whitney struck me as sincere and genuinely nice. Plus, we all know that “reality” these days means scripted stories where the stars use their real names!

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dance moms kalani maddie

 Abby Lee Miller has taken the ALDC back to Los Angeles, which, for us dear viewers, means a week free from Candy Apples scripted craziness. That’s enough for me! It’s the little things. Last night’s episode of Dance Moms begins with the entire troupe in Lala Land, and Melissa brags that MacKenzie was chosen to go with Abby on a recent studio scouting expedition. All of the moms hope that this time on the West Coast will go much more smoothly than the last time. Jill reveals that Kendall wants to work on her music (she’s got the voice for it), and Abby has promised that she will focus on a music video for sweet Kendall. Of course, Jill knows not to rely on what has been said in the past.

At rehearsal, Abby is strangely chipper and excited for this week. Abby is ready to work on Kendall’s dancing, and Jill interrupts to remind her that she’s spread thin as far as contracts and deals go. Abby tersely reminds Jill that she’ll do her best. Holly understands Jill’s struggle (it’s real, y’all), and she apologizes in advance if Nia takes some time away to work on a music video courtesy of Aubrey O’Day. Abby is all kittens, rainbows, and unicorns about Nia’s opportunity, but she reminds her dancers that they have cell phones…if something comes up that she isn’t privy to, they should dial her immediately. Holly gets the message loud and clear, and Jill hopes the women’s relationship is on the mend.

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southern charm shep

Y’all, I just can’t help myself. Like Craig Conover is addicted to VIP status and Shepard “Shep” Rose is addicted to teeth whiting, I have a serious problem when it comes to saying no to Southern Charm.  Cameran Eubanks is spot on with her assessments of things idiots and asshats, and it is fascinating to watch the drama play out between Thomas Ravenel and Kathryn Dennis on every episode knowing that we can catch the live show at any time on any given form of social media! Now, if only we could add some spice to the resident nice girl Landon Clements. Perhaps a seedy after hours encounter with Whitney Sudler-Smith? Nah, she’s far too sweet and likeable for that!

Last night’s episode returns on the heels of last week’s “to be continued” napkin-swatting, roof-raising cliffhanger. Kathryn storms out of Red Drum to Danni’s awaiting car as Thomas heads out to his Edisto plantation to relieve the nanny. The following morning, Craig is playing video games and sucking every last drop out of an Icee pop (breakfast of champions) while ignoring Cameran’s calls. Shep and Whitney are cleaning up after their wild party. Surprisingly (to me, at least), Shep isn’t afraid to get his hands dirty (although the stray boxers on the porch are a lot, even for him). Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t think Whitney would be quick to play maid…I just didn’t see either one of them lifting a finger to bring the cleanliness of the beach house back to status quo. Shep acknowledges that while he raised in a privileged manner, he still had to clean up his messes. He’s always wearing a Bert’s Market t-shirt which tells me he appreciates a 24-hour convenience store featuring any household item known to man and two crock pots…one full of chili and one full of hot dogs for the best post-Budweiser fueled beach day snack imaginable. Whitney is likely wearing something from Kanye West’s latest collection, but he’s wearing it to be ironic. 

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love hip hop reunion rich amina

Last night was the first part of the Love & Hip Hop reunion, and Mona Scott Young has given up her throne in favor of Nina Parker. Here’s hoping she’s able to bring out the dirt without inciting anyone to physically injure any of their co-stars. I’m not counting on it! Per the usual, it’s a lot of fake hair and dresses for which I would have given my right arm to wear to my junior prom back in the mid-90’s. There have been so many random characters who have appeared this season for no reason, the VH1 crew was probably hard-pressed to find a sofa that fit them all

Luckily, they are one person short, as Erica Mena has decided to forego the festivities. Ahhh, it seems Mona has scored the sit-down with the original franchise’s most volatile cast mate who claims she’s ready to start a new chapter in her life. Erica doesn’t want to risk a setback to her positive life changes, so she’s refusing to take part in the reunion. However, she’s happy to dress as if she’s ready to cut a bitch while wearing a cleavage-friendly sequined semi-formal. Erica believes she’s being very generous by letting CynRich Dollazand Chrissy Monroe have their time without her interrupting. After all, she is their story line. They can make up stories while she continues to prosper. Erica’s volatile relationship with Cyn is showcased, and there are some scenes I would have thought were from last season they took place so long ago. That’s a may be a sign the season played out a little longer than necessary. 

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dance moms kelly abby fight

Well that didn’t take very long! Just a little over a year and a half ago, Abby Lee Miller fell victim to an atrocious attack which was not in the least bit provoked by Miller herself. Nope. Not one bit.

I’m sure all of you Dance Moms viewers (I hesitate to say fans, as I feel y’all, like me, watch out of sheer horror and weird fascination) remember the episode that aired in November of 2013 when Kelly Hyland had had enough of Abby’s hatefulness towards her two daughters. As she pointed in Abby’s face, screaming, Abby retaliated by acting as if she was going to bite of Kelly’s finger. If you need a refresher, I’ve posted a clip.

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rhonj melissa gorga jewelry

How did I miss the fact that Melissa Gorga had a jewelry line that actually survived the “idea” phase where many a housewives’ hock is created but never comes to fruition? Clearly, cookbooks and cheap sweet bubbly are immune from this branding backlash phenomenon!

The Real Housewives of New Jersey star has launched her own line of affordable baubles on HSN, and dare I say the majority of the line is both wearable and budget friendly. I’d have predicted a lot of gaudy CZ at blood diamond prices, but I was pleasantly surprised!

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love hip hop peter erica

I can’t say I’m surprised to hear that Erica Mena is calling it quits on a little scripted train wreck I like to call Love & Hip Hop. The controversial star spent more time over the past few seasons starting fights, slaying the viewers with ridiculous one-liners, and trying to decide if the lady pond was the best place to swim. However, on the most recent installment, Erica wasn’t starting club brawls…if she was even featured, she was chatting with her son, giving reasonable advice (what?) to her co-stars, and gushing about her upcoming wedding to Lil’ Bow Wow

Of course, most of the time Erica was just absent. The once wild-eyed, sharp-tongued crazed instigator took a backseat on the show where she was once the focus. If she was filmed, Erica was calm, cool, and collected. I felt like I wasn’t even watching L&HH in terms of Erica’s contribution, but thankfully Rich Dollaz brought me back to reality (the fabricated kind) every week.

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Dance Moms girls

Thanks for tuning in to episode 1,000,314 of this season’s Dance Moms. You, like myself, must be a total glutton for punishment! Abby Lee Miller was up to her old tricks again, although this time she wasn’t yelling. Instead she was incessantly praising her star Maddie. Don’t get me wrong, I think Maddie is ridiculously talented and it’s not her fault her teacher alienates her with favoritism. However, it was a bit odd given that Maddie wasn’t present on last night’s episode to receive said praise. After a successful competition last week, the girls are missing Maddie who is performing on SNL with Sia. Melissa hates that she isn’t in New York with her daughter but she has to be there to support her other daughter…what’s her name? Oh, yeah, MacKenzie. I may just call her Maddie’s sister to make it easier. After all, that seems to be how everyone else refers to her. 

Abby congratulates the team on a clean sweep and cites that it’s quite a big deal she’s chosen to be in Philly with them instead of in the Big Apple with Maddie. Jessalyn is excited to be returning to LA in a week now that JoJo has a team jacket. What a tease! The previews insinuated they were heading back to L.A. this week! How long are they trying to make this season? Is it lasting until 2018? Abby reminds her team that they are pretty much nothing without Maddie, but she’ll be interested to see how they fare in Maddie’s absence. She’s guessing not very well…

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