Summer may have ended(ish) in the blink of an eye (seriously, where did it go??), but the season’s anthem still rings true. Justin Timberlake reminds us all just to dance, dance, dance. Maybe we “Can’t Stop the Feeling” but I think those involved in Abby Lee Miller’s legal woes may have misinterpreted the lyrics just a tad.
The Dance Moms stars’ legal team–along with her prosecutors–clearly misheard JT because for the Lifetime reality star, “ain’t nobody gettin’ sentenced soon, so keep dancing!” It’s unclear if she’ll keep dancing with her show, but she’ll at least avoid any potential jail time a bit longer. I, for one, think the mini team had something to do with this!
So, that new girl, huh? Kelly Dodd has been making quite the splash since showing up on this season of Real Housewives of Orange County. Kelly immediately ruffled the feathers of the majority of the women by befriending and defending the exiled Vicki Gunvalson. Of course, I think we’ve all learned to steer clear of Shannon Beador’s bad side as well. Throw in Tamra Judge stirring the already drama-filled pot, and we’ve got a recipe for disaster that just keeps cooking week after week.
After the most recent shenanigans (I cringed watching, to be honest), Kelly is mortified by her behavior, “In case you are wondering, Jolie did not and will not ever watch last night’s episode. My believing that Shannon set me up and my response to Nina and Jaci’s ‘neutrocious’ (yes, I said that) lies will be revisited at the reunion, so Jolie probably will not be watching that either.”
Another seemingly happy couple thrown in to shock fans and add an ounce of normalcy to this ridiculous (yet oh, so addictive) reality series? Check. Bachelor Nation is aghast, I’m sure! One more fame hungry couple (or three!) that is trying to stay relevant by hitching its wagon to another show? Yes, please. Thanks for introducing us, Real Housewives of New Jersey (and Mob Wives)! A secret, and likely salacious duo (or trio…) tossed in for that added bonus of crazy? Why, of course!
You know at this point, I have to be referring to the upcoming season of Marriage Boot Camp, right? The Bachelor in Paradise newlyweds (and my all-time favorite reality couple), Jade Roper and Tanner Tolbert are on-hand to represent Chris Harrison’s camp, and they are joined by some familiar names that could definitely use the help!
It’s official. I absolutely adore Paul Nassifand Terry Dubrow. On last night’s Botched by Nature, the good doctors head to the Alamo and help a war veteran, all the while enjoying television’s most amazing bromance. In Texas, Rosa is beside herself to meet the men (as I would be!) who want to help her after suffering burns from a lightning strike. After surviving two tours in Iraq, Rosa returned home to be struck during a storm. Her clothes caught fire, she went into cardiac arrest, and she was in a coma for two weeks. That is my biggest fear.
Over twenty-eight percent of Rosa’s body is covered in burns and the underwire in her bra fused into her skin during the incident. She is hopeful that Terry can fix her breasts as well as a shoddy tummy tuck she endured a year after her accident. Unfortunately, Terry and Paul are not able to do much about the scar tissue on her chest, but they can even out her breasts, remove the scar from the bra underwire, and smooth out her stomach. Both men are humbled by Rosa’s service and want to be able to give her something in return.
Who tuned in to watch the premiere of Botched by Nature last night? Did you get teary? Were you lusting after that froyo? Isn’t Terry Dubrow and Paul Nassif’s bromance just the bee’s knees? In case you’d forgotten (I’ll never forget!), I got to interview both gentleman about the show, and I still don’t think I’ve quite recovered from the adorableness of it all! Naturally, I was super excited to get to recap the new season for y’all. So let’s get started, shall we?
Last night’s episode featured Sabrina and Nate, and had the doctors heading to Vegas (baby!) and California farmland. Their road trip begins in Las Vegas to meet with Sabrina who suffered dramatic weight loss due to an autoimmune disorder. After feeling insure about her flatter chest, Sabrina opted for implants. However, because of her ulcerative colitis (I’m going to be googling how to spell medical terms all season!) which affects her colon and large intestine, the implants were pushed far up her chest into an awkward and painful position. Sabrina is thrilled to meet the doctors, and Terry introduces himself as “Terry Dubrow” to Sabrina and her friends, while Paul is more formal with his “I’m Dr. Nassiff.”
Forget practicing law–I’m going to open my own Blizz franchise and be a part of the wonderment that is Dr. Paul Nassif’s frozen yogurt empire. That’s right, the Botched doctor isn’t just performing plastic surgery these days. He’s branching out–delving into the froyo business, milking cows, starring along side Terry Dubrow in an amazing spin-off (Botched by Nature), and (pinch me, I’m dreaming!) speaking to me all about the upcoming season of said spin-off!
I know, I know, you can’t believe it either, but it’s true. I was lucky enough to get to interview both Paul and Terry about their new series Botched by Nature which premieres tonight, Wednesday, August 3rd at 9 PM ET on E!. The show will be followed by Botched Post-Op (more on that in a bit), and it’s sure to be a hit. You know how there are certain celebrities you think hung the moon, only to hear that someone met them and they were rude or boring? Well, that is not at all what happened to me. I loved Paul and Terry’s antics pre-interview, but after chatting with them, my adoration is at an entirely new level…plus, I kind of want to live in Heather Dubrow’s closet! (see pic below)
Well this took longer than I expected! After all, we’re already two episodes into the latest season of Real Housewives of New Jersey and this is the first time we’re hearing from Kim DePaola. Seriously? I expect more from you, Kim!
The infamous Garden State clinger and purveyor of the finest skin tight faux fur fashions has always been full of opinions, and there is certainly no love lost between her and Melissa Gorga. In fact, if possible, Kim despises Melissa even more this season, and she’s not going to keep quiet about it.
Happy Closer to the Weekend, dear readers! You all owe me a great big thank you! For what, you ask? I basically just transcribed thirty-seven minutes of dialogue from Stassi Schroeder’s most recent Ask Stassi podcast. That means I basically gave you thirty-seven minutes extra in your life. The usually biting Bravolebrity was showing a softer side while standing strong in her decision to call it quits with her long-time boyfriend Patrick. Accompanied by her twenty-one year old sister Georgi, Stassi cried and opened up about her broken heart. Oh, and she said “like” like a lot. Like don’t make it a drinking game to take a shot every time you hear her say it because you’d be dead three minutes into the podcast. Let’s get to it, shall we?
The Vanderpump Rules star begins, “I’ve been trying to find the will to do this podcast because I’m just sad, and I really don’t have anything to say that’s just uplifting. I’m going to talk about myself and what I’m going through… I’m going to to do a reverse Ask Stassi podcast because I’m the one who needs advice and help now, like somebody, like, throw me some meds,” before transcending the podcast, saying, “I just felt like if I’m going really talk about things, I can’t just do the podcast by myself. Like I just can’t do an alone podcast and like talk to a wall and want to kill myself because, like, I actually like feel like I want to kill myself.”