This is the season that doesn't end…yes, it goes on and on, my friend! Last night was yet another episode of Dance Moms in what is proving to be the most drawn out season in the history of the world. And I thought last season was long!
Abby Lee Miller is thrilled that her team is eleven for eleven this season, and she rocks the boat by including both Kalani and Peyton. She announces that she has finally replaced Brooke, Paige, and Kelly. Kalani's mom will be the new Kelly, while Kalani is the hybrid of the Hyland girls. Leslie goes crazy. Why is Peyton even here? She follows the rules! She's been trained by Abby since she started walking! What kind of witch would bring in her daughter only to make her an outcast? That's a rhetorical question, right?
We're two-thirds of the way through the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills reunion, so I think it's safe to say we can see the light at the end of the tunnel. We need to power through, people! Joyce Giraud is never going to see eye-to-eye with Brandi Glanville, and I have to agree with her assertion that Brandi's depression (and I have had people very, very close to me suffer from it, so I know it's nothing to take lightly) isn't a pass to treat people badly. Do I doubt that Brandi suffers from it? Absolutely not, but that isn't an excuse to be so hateful! Joyce also takes on Yolanda Foster and kind of disses Lady Gaga…that part I can't condone! 🙂
She begins her Bravo blog, "Hola Mis Amores! First of all: THANK YOU!!!! Thank you so much for voting for me as the Loveliest Locks. It was very sweet, and I'm so honored to have been chosen by all of you — as I do think all the ladies have amazing hair, especially my friend Kyle [Richards]. Your love and support through this journey has made everything worth it. In this portion of the reunion…"
Forget about a segue for last night's Southern Charm…let's just get started with the pregnancy drama, shall we? We pick up where we left off last week as a wasted Thomas Ravenel walks a sloppy Kathryn Dennis down Broad Street for more boozing. They flirt like middle schoolers as to whether they should purchase a pregnancy test. T-Rav questions whether Shep Rose could be the father, but Kathryn slurs that he was just a fling and goes in for the make-out. Thomas grabs ass before they head to the Rite-Aid for an EPT. I'm sure that the cab driver thinks he's being punked by Taxicab Confessions.
Back at his house, Thomas and Kathryn are plagued with test errors, which are actually more user error. A pouty Kathryn can't believe that T-Rav would be so irresponsible as to put her in a position to be pregnant (really girl?), but she gets more upset when he assures her that they may be in the clear. So, does she not want to be preggers or is this her dream? Thomas promises his entire family fortune to this potential unborn child.
Mark my words…one day Mona Scott-Young is going to take over the world. How else can it be explained that the Love & Hip Hop franchise remains so popular? The messier it gets, the more people want to watch–myself included! The woman is an evil genius, I tell you!
As fans of the VH1 train wrecks (yes, plural) are well aware, the casts of both New York and Atlanta are virtual revolving doors of ratchetness. I don't know why some hip hop artists would choose to become famous for their drama as opposed to their talent, but it seems like a pretty regular occurrence with these folks!
Jenelle Evans has found true love, y'all, and she'll confront anyone who wants to try to rain on her parade with new beau Nathan Griffith. As you know, the Teen Mom 2 star is pregnant with a boy, and Nathan is the father…but he's not to be confused with Courtland Rogers, her husband who just got out of (or sent back to? I can't keep up!) jail. Healthy, healthy, healthy!
Apparently, Jenelle's army of Twitter followers tend to rile her up from time to time, most recently alleging that Nathan has been less than faithful during the reality star's pregnancy. I'll never believe it. He's the world's best boyfriend and father! You know who agrees with me? Jenelle. You know who is hilariously bringing back Jenelle's attorney Dustin Sullivan courtesy of her Instagram? Rihanna. It may not make sense in the context of this post, but it's the funniest thing I've seen in a while.
And the backlash begins…Anna Wintour can't be surprised that fashionable hell has broken loose since revealing Kim Kardashian and Kanye West will be gracing the upcoming cover of Vogue. Sure, the magazine's editor-in-chief is the unlikely biffle of the angry tiny rapper, but I figured she'd stick to her guns about featuring Kimmie Kakes in the iconic magazine. Clearly, I was wrong! Anna even addresses her decision in her letter from the editor. She wants you to stop hating on Kim, y'all!
People reacted immediately to the announcement, with one celebrity going all vampire slayer on the situation. After learning the news, legitimate celebrity Sarah Michelle Gellartweeted, "Well…I guess I'm canceling my Vogue subscription. Who's with me?" Her diss was retweeted almost 10,000 times and favorited more than 12,000. Ouch. In light of SMG's sting, Kim's bestie Jonathan Cheban felt the need to respond. Of course he did! Let's begin with Anna though, shall we?
Raise your hand if you want to see more of Tamra Barney Judge! Anyone? Anyone at all? I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but the Real Housewives of Orange County is planning an infiltration of your televisions, and she's not even keeping her take-over to the realm of reality television!
Tamra is going to be guest starring on USA's Royal Pains which returns this summer. No word on whether she'll be playing herself getting a little extra work done…but my guess is yes! The unfiltered Bravolebrity is also teasing about a potential spin-off of her CUT gym with husband Eddie Judge. Of course, this is speculation on my part, but isn't that the fun part?
So who would have ever thought that Jon Gosselin would be reconciling with ex-wife Kate? It's crazy, right? I'm kidding, of course! The former Jon & Kate Plus Eight stars still despise one another, but I needed a good teaser. The pair is once again at odds in the media (because being pissed at each other in private doesn't garner any attention).
Lashing out about his wife's decision to feature their twins and sextuplets on a TLC update special, Jon is expressing his disgust and disappointment with the fact he wasn't asked to be included at the lengths Kate will go to in exploiting their children. You know, I was truly on Jon's side until I watched him on Couples Therapy. Geez. Cue the violins!