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Ariana Madix turns 30

Last night on Vanderpump Rules it was a birthday bonanza! First Ariana Madix channeled her inner child with a potent cocktail of tequila, tears, and trampolines. Then Peter Madrigal channeled his inner manhood with a potent cock-tail of bulldozers, booze, and booty touching in Vegas. Aaaahhh… ain’t nothing like a little boy bonding.

Ariana throws the most major of epic pseudo-kids birthday parties. It was pretty much exactly the same party Kyle Richards throws for Portia, minus the Fat Burger truck, plus an open bar. Ariana rented a bounce house, trampoline, piñata, silly string, face painters, etc. She’s also wearing a bizarre unicorn horn, dangerously protruding from her forehead. It distracts from her side-eye, because it’s like a very pointy third eye. A very pointy third eye aimed directly at Tom 1‘s shenanigans. Concerns: what happens when one mixes a unicorn horn with an inflatable bounce house? Somebody’s bubble is about to get burst!

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Kyle Richards

Kyle Richards is tired of talking about Kim Richards‘ issues, and Yolanda Foster‘s! Kyle would rather talk about Kyle. And happy things! (I’m all for that).

In her Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills blog Kyle explains why she decided to attend Nicky Hilton‘s wedding, the addition of Erika Girardi, Kyle’s frustration with being “Kim‘s keeper,” her concerns about Yolanda, and the blast everyone had at Ken’s birthday tea party. 

“I’m sure it’s confusing to some of you as to why I attended the wedding without my husband and two kids. I love Nicky so much, and the idea of not witnessing her walk down the aisle was weighing heavily on me,” writes Kyle. “My husband is the one who pushed me to go. He kept telling me that I will never get that moment back. He said that all families go through tough times but they WILL be resolved, and if I didn’t go we would all look back with regret.”

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Teresa Giudice signs bottles of her Fabellini sparkling wine

Pay attention PUH-LEAZE! Teresa Giudice will be released from prison on December 23rd, which means in 2 days’ time. Yay – it’s a golden, leopard-print, CHARGE IT! Christmas at the Giudices once again. Let’s just hope Melissa Gorga doesn’t f–k up and bring sprinkle cookies because in times of celebration – like when your sister-in-law gets sprung – only a pignoli cookie will do! 

“… she’s getting released on Dec. 23, I don’t know exactly what time. I will be picking her up and driving her home,” Teresa’s attorney James Leonard Jr. confirmed. Teresa served 11 1/2 months of a 15 month sentence at Danbury Federal Correctional Institute. She received early release as a first-time, non-violent offender, who exhibited good behavior

Despite her release the Real Housewives Of New Jersey star isn’t free as a bird! Teresa is required to wear an electronic ankle monitoring device and will be on “home confinement until Feb. 5.”

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RHOA in Miami

Honestly I don’t know what to say about last night’s Real Housewives Of Atlanta. Sorry this is late by the way – I was re-playing the ‘Glen Gets Slammed Into The Wall’ scene on repeat until dawn. 

Somewhere Glen Rice Jr. turned to the very dark side. Either he’s a drunk, rude, out of control jerk; or he’s a rude, out of control jerk, but alcohol (+ Kenya Moore?) made things worse! 

I think we can ALL agree we’re not getting the whole story from Bravo. Based on the women’s reactions, Glen’s 0-60 psychosis, plus the 3 mobile refrigerator units that appeared out of nowhere to practice their sumo skills on Glen and living room wall, I’d say some serious SERIOUS information got lost on the editing floor. Right next to Porsha Williams‘ couth, dignity, and trophy wife status! (Did she REALLY admit to a golden shower on television last night? Really?!) 

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Brooks Tells All

Just in case you need a reminder that Brooks Ayers is no stranger to scandal, he was once involved in helping Vicki Gunvalson launch a vodka line. Vicki’s Vodka went defunct after a slew of lawsuits and crazy allegations between Brooks and Vicki’s former partner Robert Williamson III. One such allegation being that Robert accusing Brooks of hiring a hitman to off him! Yes – that happened. 

The accusation came when Robert filed a lawsuit against Brooks for, among other things breach of contract, fraud, and misrepresentations

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jo de la rosa

Jo de la Rosa, original Real Housewives Of Orange County star and infamous ex of Slade Smiley, recently announced that she’s engaged!

After splitting with Slade, returning that Mercedes, and trying her luck at a spinoff called Date My Ex: Jo & Slade, plus a disastrous attempt at launching a music career (she released the album Unscripted in 2008), Jo left reality TV and the public eye behind. Instead Jo focused on building a successful career in marketing and ad sales. 

You can check out Jo’s ring below!

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Scott McGillvary of DIY Network's Income Property

DIY Network released it’s Winter 2016 schedule, which is bursting with renovation and rehab shows (i.e. my favorite kind!). 

Most exciting Scott McGillivray and Income Property (formerly on HGTV) is back to make me believe I can turn my soggy, dodgy 100-year-old basement into an apartment befitting a Fredrik Eklund listing! It ain’t gonna happen but a girl can dream of having more lucrative renters than her cats, right?!

Income Property premieres February 18th, so sadly we have to wait practically eons to see Scott’s latest renovation wonders.

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Yolanda Foster & David Foster

David Foster, like everyone else is starting to notice the inconsistencies connected to Yolanda Foster‘s very public battle with Chronic Lyme Disease. Earlier this month Yolanda and David announced their divorce and there has been rampant speculation that Lyme contributed to imploding the world’s happiest and most in love couple

All Yolanda’s Pop! Goes The Symptoms has David questioning. “They believe she’s exaggerating her condition,” explains a source close to the music mogul. David is not alone – this season several of Yolanda’s co-stars are expressing their confusion as well. Most notably, if Yolanda is doing so many treatments, how does she know what’s working? And is it the treatments or the disease that’s making her feel so ill? 

Among the oddities surrounding the Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills star’s health is her on-again/off-again symptoms, sick selfies/happy selfies instagram feed, Yolanda’s assertions that she has completely lost brain functioning.

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