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Ahhhhhh… Real Housewives of Beverly Hills where mothering is a crime against humanity because naturally that's the nanny's job. In Beverly Hills one also needs to be heavily armed and ready at any moment for home invaders. I'd be more worried about closet raiders, but you know if broke into Yolanda Foster's house I'd go straight for the Hermes belt collection. Just me?

We begin at Carlton Gebbia's house where she's hosting a party to promote naked girls. Carlton: the Playboy mansion you are not. Carlton's "nanny", who is never near children ever, which given her behavior is probably a good thing, helps choose exotic dancers to perform.

Carlton drones monotonously for the 400th time that she loves women. I am out of patience with this cougar-in-heat trying to be the Joe Francis of the middle-aged. I'm sure Carlton's daughters aren't embarrassed at allll to be seeing their mother's Sexford Wife shenanigans. 

Brandi Glanville adopted a new dog named Buddy to distract her kids from Chica's disappearance. Brandi hates Buddy and complains that he wants to be near her. He peed on her bed – yeah that's annoying, but I'm sure Brandi has also peed on her bed in a drunken stupor. 

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hollywood-hillbillies

New reality show Hollywood Hillbillies is a family-friendly series that follows a Georgia family as they trade in their country lives for a move to Hollywood! They're not just any 'hillbilly' family, however – they're YouTube sensations Michael “The Angry Ginger” and his “Mema”. 

The fun-loving family came to fame when Michael made a YouTube video defending redheads with his special kind of southern-style fury. Soon the whole family jumped into the biz and a 150 million views later the bright lights of Hollywood came a'callin. 

The show follows Michael Kittrell, his grandmother Mema, his aunt Dee Dee and uncle "Big" John through a serious of hilarious adventures as they take California by storm. 

Meet the family and watch a trailer of the new season below. 

Hollywood Hillbillies premieres tonight at 9 ET/PT on REELZChannel. 

CLICK THE CONTINUE READING BUTTON FOR THE PREVIEW! 

Camille Grammer

Camille Grammer left Real Housewives of Beverly Hills after last season and didn't even attend the reunion.

At the time Camille was a "friend" of the Housewives instead of a full-time cast member and with her boyfriend Dimitri Charalambopoulos disinterested in participating and producers deciding she was "too sensitive" for reality TV, Camille left. 

Camille then announced she was undergoing treatment for endometrial cancer

Since then lots has changed!

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sister-wives-recap

This is my first experience discussing the atrocity that is Kody Brown's hair. Why are there no cameras in his bathroom detailing how he achieves such a paragon of 80's greatness. Kody missed his calling by not going into figure skating because the twirl potential of those locks is epic. 

This week the Sister Wives took a quad-only trip to San Francisco to bond sans Kody, who is really the reason no one gets along. Meanwhile Kody stayed home to burn down the fort and show his paternal ineptitude to the world. 

Things start out with Janelle running a 5K, which I hope translates into eventually running away from Kody. To support her, Kody runs with her – well actually he runs far ahead of her. Robyn, of course, is pimping t-shirts to go along with the race that feature the word "Be:" followed by a bunch of adjectives of what someone could be. Polygamous is not on the list, but the design does feature an exploding heart. Ummm… 

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rhoa-recap

The ladies of Real Housewives of Atlanta did what they do best last night – put on some high, high heels and trash each other's relationships. Kenya Moore is slaying marriages left and right because her job is apparently The Divorce Whisperer.  She needs to focus on her own fantasy man because the so-called oil tycoon, well I think he's pumping gas at the Sheetz after she paid his coming to America salary. 

Things begin with Cynthia Bailey and Peter celebrating their three-year anniversary. Has it really been three years since Cynthia was nearly kidnapped to prevent her from walking down the aisle wearing a duct tape and hefty bag wedding gown? Time flies when you're being crazy!

Cynthia's friend Natalie and her husband Christopher show up to talk about how Cynthia and Peter are not having sex. Natalie reveals that she knows Kandi Burruss' fiance Todd. And apparently Todd is quite the hustler who was known for trying to date up – or put himself in positions to reap the benefits of his associations. "Basically Todd's an opportunist?" Cynthia asks. I wonder if Natalie has been talking to Mama Joyce?

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Nene leakes

NeNe Leakes has been bragging on twitter that she has big things planned for 2014 – and those big things include expanding her empire. 

The Real Housewives of Atlanta star already launched a production company and she's also working on a clothing line! Um… is that such a good idea

NeNe announced on her website, "I am so excited to share a little sneak peek of my clothing line! More details soon but about to help make you all look and feel FABULOUS in 2014, hunni!" She included a shot of the inspiration boards which display no shortage of tackiness in their quest to outdo the Kardashians!

CLICK THE CONTINUE READING BUTTON FOR MORE! 

Frozen World Premiere at El Capitan Theater

Amid rumors that she's being fired from Real Housewives of Beverly Hills for being boring, Kim Richards is writing one of her first blogs of the season. Of course Kim has lots to say about Lisa Vanderpump missing her daughter Kimberly's graduation party. 

True to form, good ol' Rambles meanders through her reactions to the episode. 

First of all Kim tells us what an intimate and personal event Kimberly's party was. "I only invited a small group of only our closest friends and family," Kim writes. Which includes the entire RHOBH cast? "All the people that came are so special to me and have played a part of Kimberly and my lives." 

"When I invited everyone, most people received evites and there were just a handful that I happened to invite myself — Lisa was one of those people," Kim writes. "I really was on the fence with who I wanted there. I had to consider the limited space and I did not want any problems or fighting on this very special night."

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Bravo Events - 2013

Now that hubby Kroy Biermann is on injured reserve from the Atlanta Falcons, apparently Kim Zolciak needs to do something to feed her brood of six! Call Big Poppa! 

The Don't Be Tardy star revealed to Life & Style that she's embarking upon a new career as a real estate flipper. (i.e. shameless plug to get her own HGTV show). “Kroy and I want to flip our house and other houses!” Kim shares. “We want to renovate homes or start building homes from the ground up.”

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