Last night onTeen Mom 2, some girls celebrated happily wedded bliss (again) and other girls headed towards happily unwedded unbliss (again) and some girls cried all the way home from jail (again).
Let's start and end with a positive! To start, Chelsea Houska finally accomplished something other than dumpingAdam Lind. Which speaking of positives: he was NOT presents on last night's episode. Go, MTV! Anyway, Chelsea graduated with her 600 hour aesthetics certificate and is on her way to getting her very first job. "I know I had Aubree young, but I've still accomplished what I wanted," Chelsea says. Good for her.
Threading through the mean streets of The Big Apple are apparently a whole different set of streets – tunnels perhaps that burrow under the Upper East Side spreading delusions. It's apparently whereAviva Drescher gets her information and her point of view.
We pick up where left off in another one of Aviva's garishly painted rooms where she and Carole are arguing over whether or not they are psycho or writing their own books. According to Aviva, henceforth known as "Avicious," the "word on the street" is that Carole didn't write hers. 'Word on the street,' like the machinations Aviva creates in her mind while walking down the street? Word on the street is also that Carole's fiction book was a flop in need of serious re-writes. Word on the street is also that it takes a village to write a book. Again, that's only the word on Avicious street.
Despite starting #BookGateAviva Drescher is now going on record to declare it like the stupidest Real Housewives of New York fight ever. While I quite agree, it's all AVIVA's fault we're even talking about it at all!
In a desperate bid to drum up publicity for her own book, Leggy Blonde, Aviva accused Carole Radziwill of having her famed (and beautifully written) memoir, What Remains ghostwritten. Now she's accusing Carole of over-reacting. Meviva – go home, you're crazy.
"First of all, in the history of all the Real Housewives, everywhere, I officially declare this the STUPIDEST FIGHT EVER. Nothing will change what's on the show, but I'm not going to continue the fight on my blog, on Twitter, or in an MMA (Mixed Martial Arts) cage," Aviva begins in her Bravo blog.
If you're a 16 and Pregnant fanatic, you'll probably remember the crazy story of Ashley Salazar.
Just to recap: Ashley got pregnant the first time she slept with baby daddy Justin Long which threatened to derail her big big plans to move to NYC for college. Ultimately she decided, with the support of her mother, to give her daughter Callie up for adoption.
Callie was adopted by Ashley's aunt and uncle. After the adoption, Ashley changed her mind and took Callie back for a month before realizing she wasn't ready to give up her dreams and returned Callie to her aunt and uncle. She has maintained a close relationship with her daughter.
If you've been peeking at twitter lately, you'll notice that three certain famewhores are all promoting the same event! Curious, yet? It seems the rumors are true that Kenya Moore, Brandi Glanville, and Kate Gosselin have joined Celebrity Apprentice! I feel anxious already.
Brandi has been blowing up her twitter feed advertising free hot cocoa and the opportunity to buy a pie today in NYC. I could definitely see an enraged Lisa Vanderpump fan throwing a pie in Brandi's face! And she is not alone.
Kenya announced, "Free hot cocoa and pie a celebrity in the face?!? DONT MISS IT!!! #CharityPieFace " As for Kate, she probably deserves at least 8 pies in the face. I'll volunteer. She also advertised the same charity event. Where are her kids? Wonder if Jon is on daddy duty.
Reunions… so draining! There is rarely any fresh drama, there is a lot of preening about how certain slights are the worst slights ever-ever, while other people's feelings just cannot compare. And it's just a lot of back-n-forth nonsense. Even Andy Cohen was visibly annoyed last night. Clearly he has reached the same point the rest of us have with the Richards sisters, meaning just stop whining! Go do your splits and rambles on another show.
Before that Andy calls Brandi Glanville out on doing something to her cheeks. She denies all the fillers and claims her cheeks are real. She makes Kim touch them. Kim tentatively reaches a trembly hand out and pokes gently, before laughing nervously about how it feels like skin. Like her werepuppy. I feel like this is the first human contact Kim has had since the late-90's. Andy side-eyes Brandi.