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vanderpump-rules-recap-003

What say we about Vanderpump Rules except that these girls are seriously a mess. How any of them can possibly have boyfriends is a straight-up mystery to me.

Taking a break from Stassi Schroeder's ridiculous Jax Taylor entanglement – albeit a brief six second break – we are treated to the terminally insecure and immature Kristen Doute on a girlfriend tantrum bender. 

Apparently everyone in LA is a part-time Sur employee and a maybe model/maybe hooker and they often live together and hook up. And sometimes when six degrees of Sur happens they run into each other at amateur staged for Bravo TV modeling shoots. Such would be the case with Kristen and boyfriend/concealer lover/musician/maybe hooker bedding Tom Sandoval.

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rhobh-recap-001Last night the ladies of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills continued arguing, battling, passive-aggressively sniping, and being fake to each other. They all need some hobbies. 

Things begin back in the Moroccan restaurant of horrors. If you can imagine things got even more atrocious. As if Mauricio Umansky whining and shrieking at Brandi Glanville wasn't bad enough, then Taylor Armstrong started with the drunk histrionics. 

I think Camille Grammer said it best: "Taylor, nobody cares. We've already heard your story." This time Taylor's drunken syrupy gaze blurriedly turned towards Yolanda Foster who is apparently a bad, bad, bad person because she's married to a rich man and doesn't act like an ass every single minute. Maybe Taylor should do master cleanse. It can't hurt and it's probably better than the wine cleanse she's been doing for the past couple years. 

Taylor makes some threats about how she knows what really goes on with David Foster as one her "best friends for twenty years" was married to him. She's referring to Linda Thompson. And if you recall when Taylor arrived at Yolanda and David's home the man married to one of her best friends for a zillion years had no idea who she was. It wasn't all wine and roses then either, was it Taylor. Well it was all wine… 

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Kourtney & Kim Take Miami - Season: 1

The Kardashians are baa-aack! Like they ever went away. Or ever will. I hope I didn't jinx us, but I've heard that they only thing that will survive an apocalypse are cockroaches, twinkies, and Kardashians! 

Last night was the premiere of Kourtney & Kim Take Miami. Is that their job now? With Kim Kardashian spamming her expanding uterus all over the media, and Kourtney defending her sister's behaviors – and her own ever-shifting relationship to Scott Disick – pimpmomager Kris Jenner obviously expected everyone to tune in. 

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RHOBH's Adrienne Maloof + Lisa Vanderpump & Ken Todd

Oh dear, it's not easy being Bravo's cutest dog! Lisa Vanderpump has been having difficulties with her youngest child Giggy as of late.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star tweeted: "Oh one stressful night with the gigster,sand up his nose from a run on the beach,4am trip to vet Thank u dr Robert Berschauer panic over.”

It appears Giggy is fine, but gave Lisa and Ken quite a scare no doubt. 

In other Lisa news, she took to her Bravo blog to discuss the Moroc-can't behavior of the girls last week. Lisa was equally appalled by the situation and impressed that Ken stood up for Brandi Glanville

"We are all meeting at a Moroccan restaurant, sans Adrienne [Maloof] and Paul [Nassif]. I had heard that they had removed themselves temporarily from our group. I had no idea where the individual relationships stood. I wondered if Kim [Richards] would be hauled over the coals for not having Chad's birthday at the Palms, but maybe she had a pass!" BUUUURN!

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alexia and frankie

The legal problems just never end for Alexia Echevarria. Following her son Frankie's near deadly car accident last year Alexia has been totally devoted to his recovery – and that recovery has been very costly! 

Now the Real Housewives of Miami star is suing an insurance company for $2M claiming their negligence is saddling her with the unnecessary bills. 

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rhoa-recap-episode12

Last night on Real Housewives of Atlanta it was the great booty show-down. Really. Kenya Moore decided to twirl all over Phaedra Parks' workout video and co-opt it as her own based purely on the fact that she thinks her butt is hotter and that she is more recognizable. Mind you, this is her opinion. 

Things begin with Cynthia Bailey judging a hair show. And because she's contractually obligated to spend time with Kenya, Kenya shows up to "support" her. Kenya smizes at the camera, pretends to be earnest, and claims that she and Cynthia have started to become friends. Meanwhile Cynthia is shooting her a wicked stink eye and looking like the last booty she wants to see walk through the door belongs to Kenya. 

Speaking of booties… it would appear there's a new horse in the OK get crazy and twirl corral. Chatting show-side with Lawrence and Derek J (bitchy step-sisters 1 & 2), it is revealed that the ever-humble, never wacky Kenya is coming out with her own booty workout video. A Stallion Workout video to be precise and that stallion aims to usurp Phaedra's donkey booty project. 

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bethenny frankel 051112

Bethenny Frankel is a busy girl – and not just running a Skinnygirl empire. She's apparently got lots o men to handle!

Days after it was reported that the divorcing Bethenny Ever After star had bailed on her recently renovated $5 M Tribeca apartment and moved in with billionaire new boyfriend Warren Lichtenstein, a new source claims she is still co-habitating with Jason Hoppy.

So that's gotta be awkward – do they have to schedule times in various areas of the house? 6am – Bethenny, kitchen… 

"Bethenny and Warren have been great friends for more than 20 years and he has really been a support system during this sad time," a source reveals to the Daily Mail. 

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gg-golnesa-omid-shahs-001

Uh-oh! Is GG Gharachedaghi going to make it down the aisle? A mere month after getting engaged to long-time friend turned love interest Omid Kalantari, it appears their relationship is more on the rocks than one of GG's cocktails!

The Shahs of Sunset star admits that wedding plans are well, not being planned right now as the couple struggles to make it work following their publicity stunt quickie engagement! "No wedding plans right now. I’m seeing what happens. We’re actually in a rocky place…," GG confessed to Wetpaint. 

"We both jumped the gun a bit, so we’re trying to slow things down," she reveals. However GG says things are far from over. "We’re not going to split, but we are trying to figure out where to go from here." 

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