Calling season 7 her “redemption season”Kenya assures us that myths will be dispelled and all the rumors of her s0-called horrible ways will trace back to villains with negative agendas!
“This season shows me in a different light. A lot of the lies that were told about me come to light,” Kenya says. “There were a flurry of [lies]: I’ve been called an alcoholic, I’ve been called bi-polar, I’ve been called a man-stealer— there isn’t a name I have not been called on this show. This season just shows a very different side. And really the truth.”
Will the real Kenya Moore please stand up? I mean here we have personality #265 (one for each day of the year), the forgiving, gracious, and sweet-natured church lady who has Jesus on her side to fix it.
Claudia is not holding back on the drama as she took on veteran NeNe Leakes while Kenya cheered “Yaaaaaas!” from the sidelines. The new ladies have to mark their turf, by digging in the story lines – much like cats scratching in a litter box!
Dropping some hints on this season is Executive Producer for RHOA, Carlos King. And by that I mean parroting the Bravo approved PR spin about how amazing the drama is for season 7. Hey – I’m riveted! Carlos is a big fan of Claudia joining the crew, because duh – she has like zero scruples about acting ratchet, so that makes for excellent TV. Hey – I’m riveted!
Vanderpump Rules has returned for the third season and while everyone insists the dynamic has changed, it sure doesn’t seem that way! Not. A. One of these people can get over their exes, no one can trust Jax Taylor, and Stassi Schroeder is in a new relationship that may be doing her wrong. One thing is different however – Lisa Vanderpump finally had to fire someone! And despite all the fighting, everyone can agree that none of this crazy is scripted – they’re all just truly that authentically insane!
Of course Lisa is thrilled by the “Fantastic!” new season (helllllloooo ratings!) “I’m very happy with it!” Lisa exclaims. However, someone didn’t recover from causing so much chaos. “One is missing now,” Lisa admits. “You’ll see how that plays out…,” Lisa quips to Access Hollywood. My bets are on Kristen Doute, of course! Or possibly Jax...
Speaking of which, Jax claims he’s happy for Stassi and has move on, but then slams her relationship to new boyfriend Patrick. “I don’t think she’s happy,” Jax reveals. “I think she’s really confused. I think she’s in a relationship that’s toxic right now.”
If you’ve been following the deplorable news of Here Comes Honey Boo Boo then you know Mama June is now back in a relationship with the man who molested her eldest daughter Anna Cardwell. If that’s not disgusting enough, Anna now reveals that June has stolen money her children earned on reality TV to buy him a car and other things!
Mark McDaniel spent ten years in prison for child molestation charges, got out, and immediately rekindled things with June, causing her to break-up with Sugar Bear, put all of her daughters, but most specifically Honey Boo Boo herself, Alana, at risk. Anna believes her sisters are in danger “if Mark’s back in the picture.” Anna, now 20, feels betrayed by June’s decisions and claims that June still doesn’t believe Mark molested her.
Anna initially did not believe reports that her mother had gotten back together with Mark, but has since confirmed their relationship. Anna feels June’s relationship with Mark is “ruining” her mother’s life, leading her to not only endanger her children and their relationships to their mother, but also steal from them!
Tom 1 instantly denied the allegation, Ariana did as well, claiming that she knew all along this girl had hung out with Tom, and his co-stars Jax Taylor and Tom Schwartz during a promotional trip in Miami. And that nothing went on, despite Kristen’s attempts. Kristen and Tom 1 are still together and still seem happy!
“I won’t name names, because that is not polite, but who are these weirdos talking to Scheana about Tom and I who don’t even know us?” Ariana wonders. “A conversation between Crazy #1 and Crazy #2 does not ‘hard proof’ make. ‘Texts to prove it’? I saw those texts months prior and I have more scandalous sounding conversations with my manager. ‘Selfies’? You mean one photo on a scooter at a gas station that was taken by Schwartz and sent to multiple people? Someone is using the ‘say something a bunch of times’ method of trying to make something true.”
If you’re like me, than the news that Bethenny is returning to Real Housewives Of New York sent you scrambling to watch old episodes. You know, so you could remember a time when you actually liked Bethenny before she started sabotaging her marriage and faking story lines on her spinoff Bethenny Never After!
After 3 seasons away from RHONY, in which Bethenny divorced, underwent an acrimonious custody battle, TMI’d her every waking moment in tabloids, and attempted to spin herself into a talkshow mogul’s whose only guests were Bravolebrities before being canceled. Now Bethenny, undergoing withdrawal from lack of attention, decided to come back to RHONY to “save the show.”
I don’t know if if will work in the long run but Bethenny promises the show feels fresh and new, and at least for a few episodes we’ll all tune in to see what she’s up to. Oh, but it already looks like Bethenny is having issues – she’s pretty been absent from filming because ex-husband Jason Hoppy is blocking Bryn from appearing (as per their custody agreement). We’ll see how much of a storyline Bethenny actually gives us besides spilling about why she divorced in an effort to renovate her image and swilling products from the endless well of Skinnygirl.
Remember how last season on Vanderpump Rules everyone busted Kristen Doute‘s thongbutt for cheating on Tom 1? Well this season she’s accusing him of cheating on new girlfriend Ariana Madix. I dunno kids – it seems kinda transparent to me, like Kristen just wants Tom 1 all to herself and back in her thong-th-thong-thong-thong! (In case you’re wondering why I keep bringing up thongs, it’s cause Bravo gave us a lovely shot of Kristen’s thong butt).
This season everyone on VPR has undergone metamorphosis after the insane betrayals and they’ve grown. Except for Kristen. She’s stayed the same. Well, maybe she’s grown more crazy – we’ll wait on assessing that.
Kristen is supposedly madly in love with 22-year-old Baby Einstein (Slowstein? He ain’t sharp) DJ James Kennedy, who is trying awfully hard to get some attention on this here TeeVee thingy. First he tried to be besties with Tom 1, but when that didn’t get his pale, pastiness on camera, he decided screwing the desperate and maligned Kristen would have to suffice. Other than famewhoring, James enjoys BeamerSelfies. We’ll get to that later. So anyway, everyone has learned. Everyone has grown.