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Last night’s episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey was a pleasant reminder of what this show used to be. You know, when people got along, had fun, and didn’t take every side-eye so seriously they were declaring it a nuclear state of emergency. I mean there was a time when the ladies of RHONJ didn’t spend countless episodes dissecting and cataloging every tabloid edition published in the last year to decipher just how much one said RHONJ hates another said RHONJ.

Oh, yes… that show once existed and I think last night proved it could exist again. Here is my two step plan to eradicating the petty, hateful, and mundane drama on this show: 1) take everyone out of Jersey and give them more to worry about than spray tanning and meatballs 2) Pay them only $1 per season until they agree to get along, act civilized, and go hang out at Chateau kvetching about Danielle Staub. See – not so hard, right?

So the whole gang embarked on a cross-country trek to Napa where the Blk.-meisters were to meet with Vivendi winery for a distribution deal. As Hurricane Irene is raging on the horizon, the packing commences. Everyone feigns concern about leaving their small children at home while they cavort around in the great wild west. Except for Caroline Manzo – she’s bringing her small children with her.

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I hate to say we never saw that coming, but the writing has been on the wall for, well, two seasons now. TMZ is reporting that Adrienne Maloof and Dr. Paul Nassif are headed for splitsville!

Apparently it was Dr. Paul who decided to file for legal separation from the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star, who is well aware of his intentions. The couple has made multiple attempts to work out their issues, but to no avail.

Adding to the story is RadarOnline who claims the demanding filming schedule and the strain of being involved with a reality show has been a leading cause for their marital issues.

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Jill Zarin may be letting the cat out of the bag – and Teresa Giudice‘s make-up artist may be letting the claws out on Real Housewives of New Jersey.

On a recent edition of Good Afternoon America (Jill‘s new job) she revealed that Bravo producers are considering signing Priscilla DiStasioTeresa‘s make-up artist and good fan friend – onto the show.

“I did run into her makeup artist in the Hamptons a few weeks ago and she told me, her makeup artist, that they want her to be on next season so that, to even it up, because it’s Teresa against everyone else and Teresa needs a friend,” Jill dished.

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Andy Cohen was always the most talkative – until he ended up with a stint hosting Real Housewives reunions and then he couldn’t get a word in edgewise.

In a new interview with New Hampshire Public Radio the puppetmaster behind the Housewives super craze talks how he ended up crafting reality TV shows based on crazy pseudo-rich women and what led him to become the controversial figure at the of helm Bravo.

“My mouth has been my greatest asset and also my biggest Achilles’ heel,” Andy shares. Andy says he always wanted to get into TV, but his “wonky eye” stopped him from being in front of the camera so he got involved in producing and developing TV shows instead.

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Kate Gosselin will do just about anything to stay in the limelight and that includes proposing a new dating show! I imagine it will be titled ‘See Kate Date’.

The former star of Kate Plus Eight just can’t let go of famewhoring, apparently!

In response to the rumors that she is wrangling for a new series, commedian Jimmy Kimmel created a glimpse of what he thinks Kate‘s new show would entail. Warning: It’s hilarious and probably not all that far from the truth!

So without further ado, please pay attention to Escape From Gosselin Island!

WILL YOU WATCH A DATING SHOW STARRING KATE?

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Last night on Project Runway the designers hit up Dylan’s Candy Bar in NYC to blow their wads on sugary-sweets. And sadly it wasn’t an all you can eat buffet following the shopping trip – nope, it was the unconventional materials challenge! Our designer friends were tasked with making an entire outfit made from candy in about six minutes!

Fire up your glue guns, put your sugar rush to use, and start… uhhh…weaving Twizzlers! The guest judge was Dylan Lauren, owner of Dylan’s Candy Bar and daughter of legendary polo shirt hawker designer Ralph Lauren. Why wasn’t he the guest judge? Oh, Michael Kors probably hates him or something.

Dylan’s critique went like this: ‘I like candy. This had candy on it. Where’s the candy? Oh, candy!’ Please get useful guest judges.

Since nobody cares about anything but the clothes, Reality Tea is providing you a snap-judgement photocap. C’mon you know that’s how you watch the show, too!

OK, let’s trash discuss some looks!

[Photo Credits: LifetimeTV.com]

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They’re ba-ack! The All Star cast of Dancing With The Stars was announced moments ago! And in a special twists, fans will get to chose the thirteenth all star to join the cast. The fans choices are Kyle MasseySabrina Bryan, or Carson Kressley.

Fans can vote for their favorite “Viewers’ Choice: All-Star” at www.ABC.com/DancingwiththeStars

The returning all stars are: Drew Lachey, Bristol Plain, Apolo Anton Ohno, Kirstie AlleyPamela Anderson, Emmitt Smith, Kelly Monaco, Gilles Marini, Shawn Johnson, Melissa Rycroft, Joey Fatone, and Helio Castroneves!

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Kris Jenner is the pimpmomager machine that never quits! Weeks after Kourtney Kardashian gave birth to her daughter Penelope Scotland, Kris is already feverishly trying to make her granddaughter into the next in the line of Kim Kardashians!

And according to a new report, the Keeping Up With The Kardashians star is “furious” at her mom’s efforts to pimp out her infant daughter!

Kris immediately started trying to make money off the baby, literally from the moment she was conceived,” a source tells RadarOnline.

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