It's Dr. Drewtime… I hope you stretched your eyeballs because they're about to be doing a lot of rolling. And if you're wearing false eyelashes because you want to look just like your favorite Teen Mom 2 star, I suggest you take them off for fear of injury during this reunion.
The set this year is really something – don't you love the giant TM2 letters with glittering lights. Things begin with all four girls on stage. Jenelle Evans has been taking hair tips from Chelsea Houska (but Megan is her terrible hairsome clone!) – same color red, same teased style, other than that she looks very pretty and natural. Dr. Drew asks Jenelle how Jace is. She answers, "Ummmm… who? Oh yeah… ummm… oh he hasn't been paying rent so yeah!"
Chelsea's eyelashes are a travesty. Mind you, this is her profession… Lord help South Dakota.
My personal opinion is that waiting too long (over a year) between seasons leaves viewers uninvested in storylines and confused. I mean we don't even remember why Aviva Drescher started hating Ramona Singer or when LuAnn de Lesseps became besties with Heather Thomson. Or when Sonja Morgan last wore underpants. It's just too frazzled. It's like trying to decipher the product names in an iKea catalog. While it's all kindsa topsy-turvy drama, it all revolves around Meviva – just the way she likes it!
Aviva is one of those women who is validated by attention – any attention – which is why she keeps confabulating drama that centers around sheer ridiculous-ness. She seemingly doesn't care how idiotic she looks so long as she's being focused upon and talked about. And God bless the crazy train of her thoughts because it's working!
Despite personal problemsSonja Morganjust tries to have fun.
AsReal Housewives of New York's resident peace-maker, Sonja prefers to focus on the positives of her co-stars rather than start drama. And she really doesn't have time between planning parties, wrangling interns, holding up the walls of her house with old Manolo Blahnik shoeboxes, stuffing Dubins in her toaster oven, and putting on caburlesque performances! Aaaahhh…the life of Sonja Tremont Morgan!
In a new interview with The Examiner, Sonja talks dealing with rude RHONY extra Amanda Sanders, the status of her toaster oven, and of course, her interns!
Although Tamra Barney and her ex-husband Simon Barney are legally divorced, their custody dispute over their three minor children is on-going.
Last year the two met in court to argue over whether or not Tamra could feature her kiddos on Real Housewives of Orange County, something Simon was adamantly against. Now Simon and Tamra are back in court as Tamra faces allegations of neglect! In court documents filed March 28th and obtained by Radar Online, Simon makes shocking accusations against Tamra – including that she let son Spencer's broken thumb go untreated for days while he was in her care.
Tamra and Simon share joint custody of children Sidney, 15, Spencer, 13, and Sophia, 8.
On last night's season premiere episode of 16 And Pregnant a 16-year-old high school junior from Tinley Park, Illinois named Maddy Godsey got pregnant after a one-night stand. Besides the obvious one night stand with NO PROTECTION and a dual-colored hair that seems to have a shaved widows peak in the front, Maddy seemed fairly mature and responsible – and recognized that her 'hook-up' Cody Jensen was definitely not boyfriend material.
Maddy is a high school volleyball and basketball player who has a ton of friends (and a penchant for zebra-print; a nice change from the omnipresent leopard on these shows). She lives with her mom and three siblings, including a little sister who is only a few months old. She has a good relationship with both her parents, who are divorced. Her father lives about an hour away. Maddy had a long-term boyfriend and after he broke up with her she met Codyon Facebook and the two had a one-night stand.
TamraBarney Judge and Eddie are working hard at CUT Fitness and after 8 months in business are breaking even. Good for them! She compares the venture to having a newborn and then mentions that Eddie is five-years-younger than her and the deep sexy voice (debatable) he uses to teach classes gets all the ladies' revved up. It makes Tamra jealous – and insecure about her age. Tamra says she's doing everything she can to look younger. We can tell….
Last night was the season finale of Teen Mom 2. Aaaahhh… Jenelle Evans oh my, my, my. Man every single season this girl does something to make me think less of her. I mean just when I think she can't top getting arrested for heroin after marrying someone she barely knows, she goes and makes a baby with another lunatic she barely knows not 3 months after having an abortion.
For all of that, I felt a little bad for Jenelle last night – if only because it became more than abundantly clear that she is not right. Nathan Griffithis a sociopath. Something is seriously wrong with him. We will be seeing him as the subject of a Dateline NBC mystery where he has done something truly heinous.
And also, this recap is sponsored (kidding, not really) by the maternity lingerie photo of Kailyn Lowry and topless Javi Marroquin that is framed above their bed. At least Snuffy was smiling and that may be the only smiling photo of her I've ever seen!
Quad Lunceford-Webb pays a visit to Lisa Niccole's house to discuss Dr. Heavenly's Black Tie fiasco. Lisa Nicole has a business partner who is a familiar friend (with another new face) – Dwight Eubanks! I hope his partnership with Lisa is more lucrative than his affiliation with She By SheBroke's fashion show. Dwight is looking good – his nose seems to have some added putty, his cheeks a little fuller, and he's rocking a fade.
They dive into the ludicrous behaviors of Mariah Huq – and her 'When Doves Died' outfit at Heavenly's. "What the hell," wonders Dwight. Exactly – the perfect way to sum up Mariah.