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Heather Dubrow's face during cancergate

There is so much to cover in this episode of Real Housewives Of Orange County. The drama was as fast-paced as a NASCAR race and just as laden with fiery crashes. It was hard to know where to look with all the insults speeding past. I think Heather Dubrow‘s wide-eyed, defied the effects of Botox, shocked face said it best. You know something’s big when it supersedes the glamour of a 22,000 square-foot house with its own luggage room, and a lunch menu that features “sparkle cauliflower!” (That sounds like something from the Gretchen Christine Bootay Collection). 

Before all the hate comes love-ish. Vicki Gunvalson is getting into the business-side of filling love tanks and renting out her backyard for weddings, specifically the wedding of Tamra Judge‘s son Ryan. It also emerges that Vicki and Tamra attend the same church. Tamra is in chapter 2 of Bible For Dummies and is therefore ready to be baptized at the big church party. Dunking your head in a vat of wine does not count as accepting Jesus, Tamra.

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Kara Keough & husband Kyle Bosworth

Kara Keough and her husband Kyle Bosworth are about to be first-time parents! 

Kara, who spent her adolescence on Real Housewives Of Orange County thanks to her mom Jeana Keough, retired from reality TV to attend UCLA and settle into a fame-free life. She married her NFL linebacker husband Kyle in 2014 and now works as a Marketing Manager. 

Kyle and Kara announced they are expecting via instagram in an adorable video (which is below) and confirmed they are having a baby girl by sharing photos of baby-sized UCLA Bruins cheerleading gear and some hot pink Converse sneakers. 

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Carole and The Real Baby DogCarole Radziwill had a birthday this weekend and she celebrated with a a Buddhist monk, a trip to the Hamptons, and then onto Pennsylvania for a meet and greet with fans at a car dealership. 

Along for the ride was Carole’s boyfriend Adam, and some friends – but curiously none of her Real Housewives Of New York co-stars! 

Above, Carole celebrated with her dog, Baby. “caroleradziwill: Puppy love. Hot mess. Summer is not over. @adamkenworthy” 

Photos of Carole’s birthday weekend are below.

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Missy Elliott To Join The Voice Season 9

Season 9 of The Voice is about to get its freak on! Missy Elliott has officially signed on as an advisor for Pharrell Williams‘ team. 

The Voice returns September 21, bringing Missy, a reality TV virgin, to show hopeful artists about workin’ it for the battle rounds alongside her friend Pharrell. Pharrell and Missy have been collaborating together on her recent album and in the process he recruited her to come board as a mentor. 

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manzos-albie

Last night on Manzo’d With Children Mother’s Day was celebrated with a  throwback photoshoot, Albie and Chris still pretended they don’t have jobs, and Lauren decided to never leave home again. Actually they barely leave the kitchen… what is happening in the rest of that house!? 

Caroline Manzo is stressed. First Chrissofart left mommy and is now debauched in Hoboken. Now Lauren, about to be married to Vito the living incandescence of an Al-flavored mozzarella ball, wants to MOVE. OUT. Caroline cannot have this. 

Caroline tries to convince Lauren that she and Vito should just stay at home to save their money, because Caroline is not giving them a downpayment on a house – only utilities in her house! This is what passes for responsibility in Manzo-land? Shouldn’t Lauren already have savings given that she’s been living with her mother her entire life? Caroline would prefer they make the ‘smart choice’ to live with her until they can afford to buy a nice (re: luxury) instead of living someplace dumpy (see: Crissofart’s apartment).

But Vito doesn’t want to live with Ma and Pa Smothers, he wants the freedom to show his love to Lauren and admits to his fiancé that he wouldn’t feel comfortable “in the bedroom” living at her mother’s. Does Lauren care what Vito thinks or wants? #RhetoricalQuestion.

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La La and Carmelo Anthony

La La Anthony‘s marriage to Carmelo has been under fire for a while now. Rumors have surfaced that the couple is on the brink of divorce, and now La La has been accused of cheating on Carmelo with the rapper Maino. La La denies it, of course. 

Maino’s ex-girlfriend (and baby mama) Patrice E accuses La La of being the reason Maino left her and their daughter! Venting on instagram, Patrice ripped La La a new one and called her out as a homewrecker. “How does it feel to be the slut responsible for his daughter never waking up to her father again” Patrice wrote, as reported by Page Six. “@lala does your husband know that your hoe ass has been f - - king my daughters father. That you slept over his house the other night after the movies.”

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Draya Michele White Gown & Engagement Ring

If you can’t make it down the aisle how the hell are you gonna make it until forever? I guess those details don’t concern Draya Michele or Orlando Scandrick and their revolving door of an on-and-off-engagement!

The Basketball Wives LA star has made no secret that she loves her Orlando, after breaking up for a couple months, he finally popped the question in June. Then they then called things off in July, but come August Draya’s ring is back in place and blinging the answer to the question about whether or not they’ve called it quits. 

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Chloe Lukasiak wins a Teen Choice Award - 2015

Dance Moms season 6 has been confirmed, and now the popular show is launching its own app! Yay for 24/7 Abby Lee Miller access. #Sarcasm

Abby partnered with her extra-special favorites Maddie Ziegler and her little sister MacKenzie, along with Kendall and Kalani, to create the “Dance Secrets” app. The app provides fans of the show access to exclusive photos and videos, dance tutorials taught by Abby and the cast, plus “a behind-the-scenes glimpse into their everyday lives from backstage rituals at competitions, shopping trips, traveling, insider tips, trade secrets, and more!” 

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