In case you missed it, we ended last week’s episode with a puffed up Minnie Rossbringing her mom to do her dirty work at a meeting with Ms. Juicy. Minnie barely got in a few words of her own before her mom threw a whole plate of chicken wings on Ms. Juicy and stomped out. Now here we are, picking up the proverbial chicken wing pieces off the floor and wondering why a good plate of food had to go to waste (well, maybe you aren’t but I know I am).
Famously Singleis chugging right along, like the crazy mess of garbage on fire that it is. Speaking of crazy messes, Aubrey O’Dayis dragging her trapped love interest, Pauly D, to get his tarot cards read by resident bohemian priestess/supermodel, Jessica White. Just in case Pauly thought this might be fun, Aubrey makes sure to let him know if the cards don’t turn up favorable, he’s a dead man. Jessica starts displaying the cards and it turns up that they should have sex. Aubrey gloats but that’s short lived – a queen turns up in the cards and apparently, that means there is another woman in the picture. Pauly is saying he can’t date another jealous woman but sorry, Pauly, you’re already in too deep. Good luck with that.
It’s been quite the charter season for the cast of Below Deck Mediterranean but alas, it had to end somewhere. While I was just as happy as the crew to see Danny Zureikatfinally get sent home for his unprofessionalism, I will miss playing the Danny Drinking Game, which is to take one shot of ouzo every time Danny is rubbing elbows with the guests instead of doing work. The good news is, I’m totally sober for this recap so let’s get to it.
If you thought this season of Shahs of Sunset was all about divorce drama and questioning someone’s health status, you are in the same cynical boat I’m in. But Shahs isn’t all doom and gloom and this episode (sort of) proves it with the perfect formula to rally bored reality show fans everywhere: an overly staged marriage proposal! OK, I still have to be mostly cynical when watching; it’s just the nature of the beast.
We start at Mercedes “MJ” Javid’s condo, where she is busy tidying up her clothing racks so she can have a yard sale. Shervin Roohparvar comes to watch, presumably because he has nothing better to do all day and hasn’t fulfilled his camera time for the week. MJ explains that she needs to make more room for boyfriend, Tommy Feight, who I thought was already moved in anyway? She goes through the hangers and takes us for a long walk down sad memory lane and describes how her clothes remind her of times in her life. Like the time she wore this dress, Vida was berating her at a table full of people and making her cry. Yeah, probably time to get rid of that one.
We are only on episode two of this season’s Little Women: Atlanta but the drama is already on level ten. Last season’s story line was whether or not Minnie Ross was in a relationship with unknown rapper, Pastor Troy, which she finally admitted to lying about by the end of the season. This season looks pretty similar, but the lie in question is if Minnie was ever actually pregnant with his baby.
Picking right back up at the Baby Shower of Shade, with Minnie stumbling her way through some pretty weak explanations about how she had a miscarriage, this all feels like really familiar territory for the women. When the questions get too tough, Minnie gets mad and storms out in a huff, dumping a plate of cookies on her way out. Amanda Salinas is the only one who runs out after Minnie and tries to comfort her while she cries outside. The other women clean up inside, grumbling the whole way.
This week’s Famously Single is all about that low-hanging fruit. This group of Singletons isn’t just dysfunctional, but super lazy when it comes to dating. Instead of learning any useful tools on this mess of a reality show, the cast members would rather just try and hook up with whoever is still ripe for the pickin’ in the house. I don’t know how many days they have actually all been stuck together, but I suppose finding someone in the house left to hook up with is like shooting fish in a barrel. Ready, aim, fire!
Brandi Glanville and Calum Best are still dramatically working through another pointless argument about jealousies over their pseudo-relationship. In case you missed it (or in case your brain exploded from all the nonsense) last week, Brandi is upset that Calum said he would go out on a date with someone from the blind mixer, then backtracked and said he would go out with Brandi instead. She doesn’t want to be anyone’s second choice, especially not someone as lame as Calum. OK, I added that last part but you get the idea.
Tonight, Shahs of Sunset finally gave us all a much needed break from all the arguing and drunken booze-festing that our Shahs are known for. Instead of talking about illness and who is being a loyal friend, there was a lot of talk about personal growth and shoes. How do those things tie together? They don’t but never mind that, let’s pretend they do.
Reza Farahan goes to lunch with his mom. She’s thrilled about his recent marriage to Adam Neely. Despite her conservative upbringing, all she cares about is Reza being happy and besides, she loves Adam too. Reza wants her to come to Oklahoma to meet Adam’s family and she politely declines, saying she has been there once. I guess that was enough. Reza gets emotional just talking about how much he loves his mom and this is a really nice change of pace for Reza – he should do more bonding with his mother and less being a terrible friend to pretty much everyone.
If it’s one thing that the Little Women franchises can bring to the table, it’s drama…and babies. Little Women: Atlanta is no exception so let’s jump right in and see what these ladies have in store for us this season!
Amanda and Andrea Salinas, also known as the Tiny Twins, have been pretty busy. Andrea is 26 weeks pregnant with her boyfriend and full disclosure here – I had to fact-check which twin was actually pregnant because I really can’t tell them apart. I was thinking I could manage by boob tattoo alone until I realized they both have boob tattoos. So many chest and boob tattoos with this cast.