Tonight is the second installment of the reunion for the never-ending fourth season of Real Housewives of New Jersey. Tonight's segment will be all about who has the worst marriage. And for those of you who are interested in seeing a bunch of grown women engage in a game of you she-said, she-said; get ready!
To celebrate the craziest, wildest, most vitriolic and least refined of Bravo's Real Housewives franchise, we've decided to put together a little list of our top most shocking RHONJ moments. Behold the greatness below.
"I want to go on record that I’m not proud of the dark place that I went to when I lashed out at Teresa. It’s not in my nature to allow myself to react so harshly, and I feel bad about my behavior.
Unfortunately, this time I reacted after Teresa had pushed me to my limit. How many more chances and benefits of the doubts am I going to give her? There are a few things that I hold sacred in my life: my children, my family, and most of all my marriage. How dare she try to pick away at my marriage and then throw her mother under the bus and say that she is the one who told her this?
Why would she betray her mother’s confidence and get her involved in this? A lie is a lie. Trust me, if the Pope himself was spreading lies about my marriage, I would still do anything to stop it.
I'll be the first to admit that I finally took a stand on my feelings for Real Housewives of New Jersey'sTeresa Giudice after watching that horrid first installment of the reunion. Now I may be eating my words…just a bit. A very little bit. I still don't feel sorry for her, and I think I may keel over if I ever hear her utter the words "I was wrong" or "I lied." However, now I don't feel badly for any of them. They are all a bunch of fame whores as evidenced by the new Us Weekly cover story. You have to love that they're all wearing red. I guess they got Tre's devil memo!
You have to love the hypocrisy that comes with being a New Jersey housewife. One minute Jacqueline Laurita, Caroline Manzo, Melissa Gorga, and Kathy Wakile are calling out Teresa for hawking her story on magazine cover after magazine cover (after magazine cover!), the next minute they are gracing the pages of Us Weekly (high brow…no In Touch for these gals!) and bashing their former friend. Eye roll.
In a five page spread, the women spill all the details of their fallout with Tre. Now, I don't doubt for one second that Teresa is a textbook narcissist, but how is moaning about her in a national publication going to change that? Are these ladies actually expecting her to have some sort of epiphany and change her ways? Doesn't anyone know how to take the high road anymore? Geez. Build a bridge, people!
Ah my fellow readers, it appears that we aren't the only ones completely traumatized and in need of medication to deal with the trainwreck that is the Real Housewives of New Jersey reunion(s)!
Anderson Cooper stopped by Late Night with Jimmy Fallon last night and the two men revealed they're both hooked on the show – and completely stressed out by it. Anderson and Jimmy dished (and did some HILARIOUS impersonations) about the Jersey Housewives, with Anderson admitting he need to take an Ambien to get to sleep after the first reunion last Sunday!
Anderson also tells Jimmy about being bullied on Twitter over his "botched" first interview with Teresa Giudice – by her family (and as we all know, he invited her back the next day)! Watch the interview's two parts below – they're a riot.
If y'all are anything like me, you are still reeling from the first installment of the Real Housewives of New Jersey reunion. Even though it was essentially four against one with Andy Cohen sitting there like a mannequin, I have totally switched gears. I may be the only person who now has no sympathy for Teresa Giudice. I mean, take some responsibility! Geez. I am getting hives just thinking about it.
However, there were some positives surrounding the reunion. What are those, you may ask? Just some narcotics and sky-high ratings, of course!
Oh, Teresa Giudice. Didn't your very sweet mama ever teach you that if you don't have anything nice to say, zip it? I'm guessing that old-fashioned adage came before the era of reality TV! In the days following the first installment of the circus of crazy known as the Real Housewives of New Jersey reunion, all eyes are on the ladies as they scramble to defend their deplorable behavior.
In a Bravo blog I'm suuuuure she wrote herself, Teresa sorta, maybe, kinda, a little bit takes accountability while also pointing fingers at others. Just to be fair – all the ladies are behaving similarly! Let's get this started.
"Like every Housewife in every city, I think filming the reunion is one of the worst parts of our job. It's a long, long day, it always gets ugly, it's hard to sit through and even harder to watch. At least this year I knew what I was walking into: I knew the other cast members, even my family, were going to band together to bash me. Last year was a total shock. This year was just sickening and sad."
"They're so desperate to make me look bad. Here's the thing: I don't care. I know who I am and I don't need to prove it to any of them. And I'm certainly not going to waste my off-camera, family time looking up words in the dictionary and making obsessive lists about them."
It seems that almost everyday there's a little buzz about which city will be hosting the next round of Bravo insanity with its own set of overly catty, surgically enhanced, and Botoxed to the hilt drama queens…marriage license preferred but certainly not required.
While the Bravo cash cow has women fighting each other in franchises all over the country, one rumor has been consistent for a while. Could Bravo be heading to the homeland of Eden and Cruz (yeah, I went there!) to film the next installment? With the original Real Housewives of Orange County still bringing in the ratings andReal Housewives of Beverly Hills still bringing the most-talked about dramatics, wouldn't it make sense to go back to Cali for the next batch of crazy?
'Andy! Andy! Andy! Your mom's a liar, your dad's a coward, and I slept with them both – and Juicy, bitch! bleeep, bleeepetey, bleeep, bl-bleeep, bleep, c-word.' Oh was this Jerry Springer we watched last night or Real Housewives of New Jersey? I really couldn't tell because it was so embarrassing, disgusting, and low-brow.
Whatever happened last night, I am fed up. And I am incredibly horrified by the behavior I witnessed. There was once a time – long before many of you wee youngins were around – when grown women who were also possessors of the title "Housewives" behaved like grown women on TV.
And then this stuff started happening and the bottom dropped out. But to draw it out until people stoop to the lowest and expose their families as truly dysfunctional is not what Housewives was ever about. If I was interested in watching Intervention, I would! I'm not.
Frankly, I am bored with the over-blown drama, the orchestrated plots. The storylines that never reveal the true story but always read between the lines. And the lies. So tired of the lies.
And I'm really saddened this is what it's all become. So sit there, smug and manipulative in your $2000 suit, Andy Cohen, and continue acting like you're none the wiser and it's all a little game. Just keep sitting there like the king of fools.