So what's the big reveal? Elementary, my dear Watson! I've determined that Kim is just being a stellar fiance to Kanye West. All of this Instagram craziness is just her way to make us all realize that the tiny rapper's Bound 2 video is an actual work of art. I mean, compared to Kim's latest postings, it is…right? Slow clap, Kimmie. Slow. Clap.
As the Kardashian family traumatizes Thailand with their famewhoring while they film for Keeping Up With The Kardashians they have been posting selfies and beach photos galore. Kim took it one step further by uploading a totally corny and embarrassing slow motion music video of herself posing on a boat. Really cringe-worthy.
Okay, so this news isn't shocking, but it's annoying. It's another Kardashianshow. They just keep coming, and nothing can stop it. It's like a bad case of the stomach virus or the slugs that flock to my backyard when the weather gets warm. Kardashians, slugs, and stomach bugs…sounds about right!
However, while this news is bad, it isn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. You see, when I was first checking out Kim Kardashian's website, I was worried that we were going to be bombarded with something much worse than yet another show. I thought Kardashian dolls were coming. Can you even imagine? Thankfully, I didn't read things carefully, and Kris Jenner, if you're reading this, the dolls were my idea. TM. Don't. Please, please, don't.
The Hamptons are not ready to be taken over by Kourtney Kardashian and Khloe Kardashian. Within hours of the news breaking that the reality stars will be shooting Kourtney and Khloe Take The Hamptons this summer in the upper crust Long Island, New York Summer paradise, the locals took to Twitter to share their feelings about the coming Kardashian invasion.
The reality sisters often shoot a Keeping Up With the Kardashians spin-off during the summer, with previous seasons following them living it up and opening a new DASH store in Miami and one with Kim Kardashian in New York City. Remember that one?? It had the awkward addition of Kris Humphries?!?! E! doesn't seem to play that season over and over in re-runs. Wonder why?
The duo has already taken Miami in one of the family's bazillion spin-offs, and if it isn't broke, why fix it? Kris Jenner is determined to shove her offspring down our throats in as many ways possible, and this time the folks of East Hampton will have to sacrifice their summer for some reality vapidness. Somewhere the Countess is rolling her eyes!
Joan Rivers — the hilarious host of Fashion Police — recently filmed and released a comedy sketch with Ray J for her WE TV show Joan & Melissa: Joan Knows Best? — spoofing Ray J and Kim Kardashian's famous sex romp. A sex romp that happened in 2003 and was "illegally" released in 2007. A sex romp which also — I might add — made Kim Kardashian a household name and catapulted her family into superstardom. Seriously, if there had never been a sex tape, there would not have been a reality show. And it begs the question, if there had never been Keeping Up With the Kardashians — Would we even know the name Khloe Kardashian?
Speaking to TMZ, Reza said, "That is some desperate sh-t."
"That is some desperate sh-t," repeated Reza. "He had to have her standing behind him to get her on that mother f–king cover." Reza went on to suggest Kanye PAID for the Keeping Up with the Kardashians star's Vogue cover.
And the backlash begins…Anna Wintour can't be surprised that fashionable hell has broken loose since revealing Kim Kardashian and Kanye West will be gracing the upcoming cover of Vogue. Sure, the magazine's editor-in-chief is the unlikely biffle of the angry tiny rapper, but I figured she'd stick to her guns about featuring Kimmie Kakes in the iconic magazine. Clearly, I was wrong! Anna even addresses her decision in her letter from the editor. She wants you to stop hating on Kim, y'all!
People reacted immediately to the announcement, with one celebrity going all vampire slayer on the situation. After learning the news, legitimate celebrity Sarah Michelle Gellartweeted, "Well…I guess I'm canceling my Vogue subscription. Who's with me?" Her diss was retweeted almost 10,000 times and favorited more than 12,000. Ouch. In light of SMG's sting, Kim's bestie Jonathan Cheban felt the need to respond. Of course he did! Let's begin with Anna though, shall we?