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Keeping up with the Kardashians

KIIS FM's 2012 Jingle Ball Held at Nokia Theatre L.A. Live - Arrivals

Like, oh my God, is there is anything that those Kardashian/Jenner girls don't do?  They are like, designers and writers, and they like are so fashionable.  It's no surprise that fifteen-year-old Kylie Jenner and seventeen-year-old Kendall Jenner are following in their older sisters' footsteps when it comes to branding.  After all, like, look at who their mother is!

While the Jenner girls are no strangers to clothing lines (they have their own with PacSun) and the latest fads (embarrassingly, I follow them on Twitter…and not for this gig–although I suppose that should be my excuse!), both sisters want to do things their own way.  They don't want to be compared to their Kardashian kounterparts.  Hey, can you blame them?  However, Kendall and Kylie admit that they would be open to a klothing kollaboration with sister Kim's baby daddy Kanye West.

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The viewer numbers for Sunday night are in! This week, our favorite reality TV shows are competing with Shark Week, which is wildly popular. Who will win?

Real Housewives of New Jersey, Keeping up with the Kardashians, and Sister Wives held steady despite the deadly competition.  Real Housewives of New Jersey's viewership (2.48 million last week and 2.574 this week) didn't seem to be affected by the media storm surrounding Joe and Teresa Giudice's federal indictment

Meanwhile, the sharks ate the Hollywood Exes alive, as only 667,000 viewers bothered to tune in.  Hollywood Exes has two problems in my opinion.  One – too much competition on Sunday. The show should move back to Wednesday. Two – viewers are over the Andrea Kelly and Jessica Canseco drama. 

Finally, Princesses: Long Island finished their first (hopefully last) season on a higher note, with 899,000 viewers.  Even the sharks swam away from this hot mess in search of something less irritating. Princesses Long Island's season average was 889,300.

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Is Kanye West planning to buy Elvis Presley's Graceland?

Every once in a while there's a rumor that you know has a .001% chance of being true, but it's just too funny to pass up. And we could all use a story that isn't related to the Real Housewives of New Jersey, right?

The latest crazy Kim Kardashian/Kanye West gossip is that Kanye is considering putting in an offer to buy Graceland. I realize their new mansion is still under renovation, but I'm highly doubting this one. Here's the scoop:

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Just call them the queens of tease.  Ever since the birth of Kim Kardashian's daughter, North, was born in June, the family has let speculation over baby photos, first appearances and the like run wild. 

The madness started when photos of North (still not convinced that this is the name they're sticking with) hit the internet, with the family quickly denying that they were the real photos. They claimed Kim sent out several "fake" pics to see which of her friends would betray her and try to sell them.  Why send them at all, then? Just don't let anyone see her until your million dollar deal is done. 

Next we heard rumblings that North would make her debut on Kris Jenner's new talk show, a rumor Kris played coy with for weeks.  On the premiere of the show she faked out the viewers by bringing a swaddled infant on set at the end of the show, finally revealing that it was NOT granddaughter North, but the child of a staff member. 

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The viewer numbers for Sunday – reality TV's busiest night – are in! 

Good news: Keeping up with the Kardashians ruled the night. (Obviously, I mean good news for them, not us!)  2.83 million people (up from 2.6) tuned in to see the Kim and Kompany in Greece.  And Hollywood Exes finally saw an increase!  The show premiered to 1.7 million viewers, fell to 723,000 its third week, and came back with 957,000 this week

Decent news: Sister Wives attracted 1.97 million viewers. Sure, that's down from its premiere, but kudos for them for having any viewers at all. (ICK. I can't STAND that guy!) 

Bad news: Real Housewives of New Jersey fans came in droves to see the Joes fight (2.7 and 2.83 million the past two weeks) but fell to 2.48 now that the drama is over. I'm curious to see if Joe and  Teresa Giudice's real time legal issues  affect RHONJ's ratings.  And only 798,000  regretful  viewers cared to watch Ashlee's meltdown on Princesses: Long Island.

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Kim Kardashian at LAX

You know that scene in Ghost when Whoopi Goldberg's character looks at Demi Moore and says, "Molly.  You in danger, girl"?  I picture something like that happening when I think of the recent Kardashian drama…only in my head, Kim Kardashian is Molly and the part of Oda Mae Brown is played by auto-tuned Jonathan Cheban.  Why?  Because Kim was in danger earlier this week!

A foolish paparazzo tried to sneak onto Kris Jenner's property Monday, and the mother-daughter duo retaliated in a flurry of cell phone footage and hashtags.  Hashtags?  I hope she has a permit for those!

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Kris Jenner Extra

It hasn't been a good week for those closest to Kim Kardashian, that's for sure.  Not only has her mother Kris Jenner's talk show trial run been universally panned, her beau Kanye West is scuffling with paps at the airport.  Good times!

First up, New York Post columnist Linda Stassi is claiming that Kris has been trying to bribe her for better reviews after writing that the pimp momager has as much business helming a talk show as her "talentless daughter had for hosting a talent show."  Ouch.

According to Radar, Linda claims her "first bribe" arrived on Thursday in the form of a dozen gourmet cupcakes and a sterling silver Tiffany pen worth $325.  Hey Kris!  Although I haven't seen it, I'll happily write a sweet little review of your show for the right price!  ;)

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Pregnant Kim Kardashian and Kanye West strolling in Paris

It can only be likened to a national security breach…baby North West may have been photographed.  Or not.  It may have been a stand-in baby. Either way, it's a big deal.  {Yawn}  

Seriously, if real pictures of the newborn have leaked, pimp(grand)momager Kris Jenner and Kim Kardashian could be out of a hefty payday.  Hmmm…maybe Kanye West is the true mastermind behind all of this.  How brilliant!

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