It's been said that in life only two things are certain–death and taxes. Well, dear readers, I'd like to think y'all would agree with me if I tweaked that saying just a bit. In the reality world, the only two things that are certain have to be Kris Jenner creating rumors about her family in order to stay relevant and Kim Kardashian talking when she should just smile, look plastic pretty, and wear heinous tiny rapper inspired outfits. Am I right or am I right? Of course death, taxes, and all that jazz come into play as well…although have we seen any Kardashian 1099s?
Where to start, where to start? Should I lead with Kim's unfortunate but likely well-intended Twitter posts or Kris speaking out about the gossip she planted about her marriage? It's quite the conundrum. Thank goodness I've got a glass of pinot noir and a Ducky Dynasty marathon to soothe my Kardashian-riddled nerves. Join me, won't you?
When I think of the Kardashian/Jenner klan, warm and fuzzy thoughts don't often come to mind. Sure, Khloe Kardashian Odom is slightly bearable, and those Jenner girls are pretty, but let's face it. With Kris Jenner as their momager, they're bound to be extremely entitled, over exposed, and annoying any day know…if they aren't already.
With all of this going on with the girls in this family, sometimes the guys get the short end of the stick (anyone remember poor Rob Kardashian when Oprah Winfrey came to interview the krew? At least he has his sock line.). It's sad really. Of course, no one is more disrespected, ignored, or made fun of more than dad Bruce Jenner. Poor guy is legendary Olympian, but at his home, he's the butt of all jokes.
The Kardashian sister trio is complete again. Khloe Kardashian-Odom finally joined her sisters, Kim and Kourtney, over in London this weekend (after finishing up her X Factor duties). Khloe arrived just in time for the official launch of the Kardashian Kollection for Dorothy Perkins at the Westfield Shopping Centre.
London LOVES the Kardashians, y'all. Like LOVES them. Loves them so much they caused a stampede at the mall this weekend! If you take a peek in the gallery (second page) below you'll see shots of the sea of madness! Police had to talk to the crowd and worked hard to keep things under control. There were a few reports of injuries and girls fainting. The shopping center let people camp overnight before the line opened up at 7 a.m. Media outlets report that "when the number of fans reached 10,000, the situation became chaotic."
That is crazy. Overnight camping for a meet and greet / clothing line launch? I think someone lied and told them it was a Twilight premiere.
Kim and Kourt headed over to a launch party last night at Aqua and then Kim ditched out to go grab dinner at Hakkasan restaurant with her soon-to-be-husband-three, Kanye West. If you take a peek in the photo gallery, you'll see Kanye almost eat pavement.
Random observations: is Kim getting spraytan-happy again? Look at how white her hand is compared to her legs. And this one may show just how much time I spent watching videos on MTV back when they actually played music videos (or any music for that matter), but the first thing that came to mind when I saw Kourtney's tights and sheer sleeves were the twins who always wore polka dots in the Cinderella (hair band, not the princess) videos back in the day. No? It's just me?
When it comes to Kardashians one can expect everything is a PR spin machine manufactured by Kris Jenner. In the latest rumor to erupt on the scene more reports are emerging that Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom are in major marriage trouble!
In Touch Weekly touts the couple is on the brink of divorce in their newest cover story, claiming Khloe is begging Lamar to go to "couples therapy – or else!" Khloe is apparently "heartbroken" that her marriage is in such trouble.
“He’s been so distant and stressed with basketball lately," an insider reveals. "She doesn’t know what else to do.” In a desperate bid to save their marriage Khloe is going to "make-or-break" efforts because “she’s reached her breaking point in a marriage that has been struggling for months.”
Ouch. Things are not looking good for this season'sX Factor and all signs are pointing to Khloe Kardashian as the reason. It's no secret that pretty much everyone in the world is so sick of this overexposed family, but I would have thought this hosting gig would perhaps legitimize Khloe since it's not actually a mind numbing E! reality show that follows around her family as they get married do nothing…vapidly.
It seems that many X Factor viewers have expressed their disdain for Khloe getting the gig, and ratings have been Plummeting (yes, it's so bad I needed a capital P) since she joined the show. I know what you're thinking…she's only been on the two live episodes thus far. That's what makes it even worse!
Simon Cowell is being blamed for bamboozling Fox into thinking that Khole would be a fan favorite who would boost ratings. Little did he know that instead she would bring a boycott.
I honestly think that if the Kardashians had to stay out of the spotlight for even just a day, they would shrivel up or something. Don't they get exhausted chasing fame? As if I don't already know the answer to that! They are never, ever going to go away.
Kim, Kourtney, and Khloe are gracing the cover of this week's print edition of Us Weekly, setting the record straight on all of the relationship rumors planted by mom Kris Jenner to keep her girls relevant swirling around. The magazine touts an exclusive, but it's really just a bunch of sound bites and sources and quotes. It doesn't appear that the sisters were actually interviewed for the article. Shocking, I know!
Earlier this week it was discovered that the L.A. County Dept. of Children and Family Services paid a visit to the Jenner home to investigate reports that Kendall and Kylie were being mistreated.
Among the allegations: Kendall was suicidal and wanting to jump off the Hollywood sign and Kylie was being beaten with a belt. The authorities realized it was all crap shortly after arriving at the home and being presented with proof that everything was fine and Kris could produce evidence that Kylie wasn't even in the country at the time of this supposed belt attack.
Kris Jenner called in to TMZ yesterday (from Australia) to say that she isn't taking this harassment lightly and she is going to hunt down the culprit. Kris is pretty sure she already knows who the caller is.
The Kardashian-Jenner may do and say a lot of questionable things in the name of fame, but they seem to really look out for each other, so this is one rumor we definitely didn't believe.
Kris and Kendall are now over in Australia where Kendall is due for a photoshoot this week. Here's the mother-daughter duo on the red carpet yesterday. Check out the gallery below.
TELL US – DO YOU THINK THERE'S ANY CHANCE THE JENNER GIRLS ARE IN DANGER AT HOME?