The All Stars series will have new judges (nope, no Heidi Klum), cutthroat competition and plenty of fashion to judge and snark at! Angela Lindvall, Vogue covergirl extraordinaire will serve as hostess. The judging panel will also feature famous designers Issac Mizrahi (also of Bravo’s The Fashion Show) and Georgina Chapman (behind the celeb favorite line Marchesa). Marie Claire’s Editor-in-Chief Joanna Coles, who has made several appearances on Project Runway, the original, will be replacing Tim Gunn as the designer mentor.

Included in the cray-cray is a bevy of impressive guest judges from Miss Piggy, supermodel Miranda Kerr and musician and producer Pharrell Williams, among others!

The prizes are incredible! The winner receives an exclusive designer boutique in select Neiman Marcus locations and on the store’s website, $100,000 dollars from HP and Intel, $100,000 cash from L’Oreal Paris, a feature in Marie Claire Magazine plus a guest editor position at the magazine for one year, and a sewing and embroidery studio provided by Brother International. WOW! Well, at least we know these guys can sew a sleeve and insert a zipper!

Let’s meet the returning designers!

Kenley Collins (Brooklyn, NY) – Season Five, Second Runner-up

Michael Costello (Palm Springs, CA) – Season Eight, Fourth Place

Gordana Gehlhausen (San Diego, CA) – Season Six, Fourth Place

Mondo Guerra (Denver,CO) – Season Eight, Runner-up

Mila Hermanovski (Los Angeles, CA) – Season Seven, Second Runner-up

Kara Janx (New York, NY) – Season Two, Fourth Place

Elisa Jimenez (New York, NY) – Season Four, 10th Place

April Johnston (Savannah, GA) – Season Eight, Fifth Place

Rami Kashou (Los Angeles, CA)– Season Four, Runner-up

Austin Scarlett (New York, NY) – Season One, Fourth Place

Jerell Scott (New York, NY) – Season Five, Fourth Place

Sweet P/Kathleen Vaughn (Pasadena, CA) – Season Four, Fifth Place

Anthony Williams (Atlanta, GA) – Season Seven, Fifth Place

A trailer of the crazy, dramatic, fashion-filled new show is below. Oh, I so can’t wait for the return of Mondo! Project Runway All Stars premieres Jan 5th 9/8c on Lifetime.

WHO ARE YOU EXCITED TO SEE RETURN? WILL YOU BE WATCHING?

THE VIDEO PREVIEW IS BELOW!

Speaking to The Insider about how life has changed since winning Project Runway, the former beauty queen credits her success on the show to judge Heidi Klum! “I know without a doubt I could not have won Project Runway without Heidi.” And following her win she has left Trinidad to pursue a career in fashion. Additionally, she has been hard at working actually learning how to sew, cause you know, it’s sort of important when your career is fashion designer!

“I am going to build my online presence; I think that’s very important now. So that people can see my clothes. I am living in New York and going to try to learn a lot of the sewing techniques that I didn’t have time to learn yet, since now I am off the show and there is no pressure. I am looking forward to making a name for myself, and having people see my designs.”

“I want to go back now and learn the more important pattern making skills, because it really does help with my designing capabilities.” Um… good, because I’d like to see an evenly cut neckline in any future Anya collections!

As for her sewing experience prior to appearing on Project Runway, Anya clears all that up! “I had an instructor, she is from Tobago. She kind of taught me the basics but also taught me how to get through [the show] – we really focused on what I would have to do on the show,” she explains. “I didn’t learn a lot of pattern making, I learned a lot of draping skills.”

Hmmm… something about this sounds suspicious – she really thought those skills were going to get her through the competition after watching previous seasons of the show and seeing some of the skill-set? I mean, every past winner had impeccable construction skills!

The former Miss Trinidad and Tobago, who actually competed in the 2008 Miss Universe Pageant, reveals that she attended Parsons but studied graphic design because the fashion program was so “competitive.” She realized she had an eye for fashion while competing in Miss Universe. “I got the chance to design some of the clothes for my competition (and because the clothes were being made for me I didn’t have to make them myself) and that kind of showed me that I could maybe start a line on my own. I think I have a natural desire and flair for it.”

As for the drama and backstabbing associated with being a Project Runway contestant, Ayoung-Chee tried to stay out of it! “I was a little surprised watching the show after and seeing what was going on behind the scenes,” she expresses. “I really hate all that drama! I was very surprised to hear a lot of things happen that I didn’t know had gone on.”

She also reveals that despite all the condescending comments he made behind her back, she is good friends with first runner-up, Joshua McKinley (aka Eyebrows McSequins) and she feels his (and other contestants) snarking and complaining about her lack of construction skills were “completely valid,” admitting: “If I was them I think I’d feel exactly the same way. I really get it.”

Now for the juicy details! In case you haven’t heard, Anya was a participant in quite a racy three-some sex tape (screen shot, below) that leaked after her ex-boyfriend’s laptop was stolen! Wait – haven’t we heard this story before…? Is Kris Jenner managing her?

Talking about the scandal that plagued her prior to the appearing on the show and resurfaced once she nabbed the spotlight, Anya insists she was completely prepared for the backlash!. “I am a very honest person and I just wanted to put everything out on the table, since people were talking about,” she asserts. “When I applied for Project Runway, I had told [producers} about the tape. I didn’t want them to find out in some other way.” And then the producers got dollar $ign$ in their eyes when they heard the phrase: ‘ex-beauty queen with sex tape who can’t sew’ and cast her immediately!

“The tape caused a lot of hurt and a lot of shame, Trinidad is such a small and religious country. It was very hard for me and especially my family,” she admits. Despite the embarrassment, Anya moved on and is focusing on the positives that came from appearing on the show! “It’s been wonderful to do something I really have a passion for.” Best of luck to Anya, we’ll be checking in to see if she learned to sew a sleeve!

THOUGHTS ON ANYA’S INTERVIEW? DO YOU BELIEVE SHE DESERVED TO WIN PROJECT RUNWAY? ARE YOU SURPRISED BY HER SEX TAPE SCANDAL? DO YOU THINK THAT HAD ANYTHING TO DO WITH THE PRODUCERS CHOOSING HER FOR THE SHOW?

It’s two-days before fashion week and everyone is in a tizzy! Tim Gunn greets the designers in the workroom and announces he is furious at the crack-smocking judges’ critiques of the mini collections. He offers the real final three props and calls the judges out on their cray-cray; although did I hear him say he loved Eyebrows’ Grecian catsuit?! I think he just said that to be nice and to point out clearly and emphatically that little miss Anya had no business taking her messy used “intimate tapes” sheets to fashion week. In fact he told her as much! That’s the spirit, Tim. The old Tim we know and love! Tim announces a surprise gift! An additional $500 to spend at Piperline Mood to buy whatever they want!

Anya is over-whelmed by her lack of a collection and starts to panic. Viktor announces he will be re-making his fabulous grey gown?! At Mood, Viktor demonstrates he has been spending too much time with Eyebrows as he gravitates towards sheer – and not just sheer, cheetah print sheer!

CLICK THE CONTINUE READING BUTTON TO READ THE REST!

Anya has no plan and is buying whatever catches her eye (does she understand what a cohesive collection is?) and announces she will be making three new looks! Tim pulls Kim away from more embellishments. Good call. In the workroom, Viktor takes on the role of Tim Jr., reminding Eyebrows to re-focus and stop over-doing it.

This week’s Fashion Week Meltdown comes from your favorite drama-douche and mine: Eyebrows McSequins! It went a little something like this: Tears! WAAAAH! “I just waaaannnaaa wiiiin!” Anya commiserates – “my collection sucks tooooooo! Waaaah!” *Hugs.* Well, get to working and quit yer bitchin!

On Fashion Week Eve, everyone has a million things to do and no time to finish any of it. You know, the Project Runway usual! Tim is doing the final critiques and everyone is having some issues. Tim is “concerned” that Kimberly has no clue what she is doing with less than 24-hours left til the show.

Anya gives a beauty queen speech to Tim about how she is “humbled” by the experience. Tim is like: ‘yeah, yeah – whatever. Next!’ Viktor made some serious changes and Tim is not into it. Tim encourages Eyebrows to think carefully about the pieces he’s added as they look peculiar with the original collection. He is once again against that hideous schizophrenic bedsheet print. Viktor decides to edit himself into a fault to prove to the judges he isn’t attached to his clothes. Bad move.

Let the show begin! The guest judge is L’wren Scott – legendary fashion stylist and designer, who was probably laughing into her program at ¾ of this schlock.

Kimberly:

Kimberly opens with two looks from her mini collection and I have to say her pieces moved well and were lovely. The Kaleidoscope dress was really striking on the runway. The white satin pants look was oddly placed and the pink skirt with the cream jacket was everywhere– too much volume and too much satin. The collection sort of fell apart in the middle, but the black sparkle dress looked much better on the Lincoln Center runway and I actually really loved it at second glance – very striking. The collection looked better the second time I watched it and there were a lot of interesting ideas that needed some serious focus and refining. I actually appreciated her styling and felt it was interesting and really worked with her theme.

The judges praised that she listened to their critique. They were ga-ga the over pink cut-out dress – I loved the zipper placement. Heidi was surprisingly into the white pussy-bow, seventies secretary outfit. The judges liked the looks, but felt it wasn’t necessarily a collection, however they did recognize that her point of view is not readily available in fashion.

Eyebrows McSequins sparkles next!

His theme was: Oooohhh… Neon! I was not loving this purple dress here anymore than I was on the mini collection; I know the Grecian drape is popular, but I think it is over-used and Josh’s looked boxy, much like I felt his orange dress was. And the technicolor print was still horrid. I liked the third look even though the judges did not, mostly because it did feel easy and the proportions were good. The fourth look was my least favorite – the skirt was garish and cheap and the boxy top hit at the wrong place. It was just off.

I get what Tim was saying about the ease, it was funky and downtown without too much effort in places. The lime green shorts were the single worst thing on the runway that day, period. Not only were they hideous and ill-fitting – they were silly!

I’m glad he re-worked the catsuit dress, but it was still pretty tacky.The material for both of the last two dresses felt like graduation robes. Cheap and shiny poly. Josh always uses the cheapest looking material around. It’s a shame really. I loved the use of plastic.

I was extremely surprised that Heidi and Nina praised his green shorts. Very surprised. Michael was impressed by the editing. Nina thought it was “most improved” and “editorial.” L’wren was interested in his point of view. They liked the cohesion of the styling, which I agree he did have cohesion in the styling, but I’m not sure about the impeccable tailoring comment. The judges dubbed his collection gutsy. I think Eyebrows could have a real future designing for the Kardashian Kollection!

Viktor:

I love the first look and it immediately sets the precedence for a sophisticated, engaging show and the second look reinforces it. L’wren is intrigued – you can tell. The third and fourth looks are fantastic. And I happen to think the sheer black column dress was striking, but the suspenders took it into the ridic category. I was very disappointed he cut the big showstopper ballgown and swapped it out with the Grease-looking pantsuit. The ballgown with the jacket was breathtaking, it would have been a tremendous way to end the collection. Viktor’s print was sensational and I actually liked the use of sheer, but felt he used it too liberally. Cutting out one of the sheer dresses and one of the sheer blouses (maybe the second one) would have improved things. I know that in compared to season’s past, this isn’t the most amazing collection, but I actually liked the looks and I could see a lot of women wearing adapted versions.

Michael loved the printed pieces and the tailoring, but he felt it was too much transparency. I agree – a little is nice, but too much for a ten-look collection. L’wren also loved the print. Nina found the collection editorial. Heidi thought Viktor showed two shows and I agree, it was a dichotomous.

Michael didn’t think it was a “perfectly connected” fashion show. They felt all the sheer pieces were missed opportunities and they really felt Viktor at the helm of his own brand. The judges placed a lot of harsh critique on Viktor when, clearly, of the final four he had the strongest collection – it seemed, again, like they were knit-picking and looking for reasons to eliminate him. He should have won- this was a well thought-out, striking collection that many women would gravitate towards.

Anya:

The first look is beautiful and striking, I loved the print. Unfortunately it went downhill from there. The second and third looks basically featured no design, the fourth look was bad loungewear, and the fifth look was a sack – literally. I liked the first black and white gown but the construction was uneven in the bust and straps. The tan thing with the belt was nothing. Really – nothing. I did like the jumpsuit shortie but again – NO DESIGN and if you look at it from the side it is clearly belted together.

What was the brown shorts romper with that odd neckline? That fabric! I liked the feel of her collection, it was very relaxed and serene, but it just simply was not a strong collection. Or interesting! Or well thought-out! Or anything really but the same two looks in slightly varying prints!

The judges were wooed by the vibe of Anya’s collection and seemed to be responding to her rather than the clothes, but did note that 8 out of 10 looks had the same neckline. Umm… for the record a “plunge” is a cinch to cut! They also gave her a pass on cohesiveness, citing that she just really wanted to work in all her fabulous prints. The also really cut her a lot of slack with the construction, claiming her “vibe” required that sort of look – so in the tropics they don’t care about evenly sewed armholes or finished hems. Good to know! They kept praising her prints and sure, she had nice prints, but nothing revolutionary or that she created (ahem, Viktor!).

The judges were so impressed that in two-days she turned it around. L’wren looked speechless – in a bad way. They felt the black and white pieces did not look last minute. I did. The judges again focused on the potential with Anya instead of the reality, as they kept saying she has a “unique point of view.” Oh stop. Remember, Uli? All they did was complain that she made the same thing over and over.

Kimberly is ousted first, followed by Viktor; then the inevitable we knew was coming – Anya is announced the winner. Congratulations.

I didn’t think they could do any worse than last season, but they did! Apparently beach-side souvenir stand hippie dresses are like the in thing at fashion week and every girl in the world is dying to wear a poorly rendered sheet with an $800 price tag. Look, Anya can’t sew and she really can’t design either. All that stuff has been done a zillion times before and much better. In fact, I’ve decided next season I’m going to march myself down to the nearest Project Runway audition carrying a garment bag full of old bedclothes with circles cut out for the head and say it’s “fashion” and then I’ll just waltz my hot pants wearing self to fashion week.

“Who doesn’t want to be that girl?” Heidi wonders as if Anya is Mary Tyler Moore! Um, I don’t Heidi. I like wearing a bra and I have a whole slew of maxi dresses from Target that are better constructed.

If the producers were trying to make a mockery out of what was once a fantastic show, they have – one-hundred percent. This, not Gretchen Jones, was the LEAST deserved win in the history of the show.

Viktor you will have a fantastic career and Anya, good luck with those caftans! I hear many old ladies in Palm Beach love them! I know I sound bitter, but I just feel for all the incredible designers who would kill to show at fashion week and she got that chance, wholly undeserved, because she made good TV. It’s really a shame for this show that it has stooped to such a pathetic level to create bad drama. I hope Project Runway All-Stars is better!

THOUGHTS ON THE RESULTS? DID ANYA DESERVE THE WIN? WHO DO YOU THINK SHOULD HAVE WON? WHAT WERE YOUR FAVORITE PIECES FROM THE COLLECTIONS?

The designers meet Heidi Klum on the runway and she explains all four designers will design a collection. But only three of them will be moving forward to compete at fashion week. They will have 5 weeks and $9k to create a 10-look collection. Tim Gunn – intellectual and compassionate sounding board – will be checking in on the designers mid-way through to provide feedback.

All the contestants engage in the tried and true emotional breakdown, crying, ‘I can’t believe I made it tears’ and they’re off! Viktor and Eyebrows McSequins hop on a subway and zoom off home. I always love it when the contestants walk or cab it home from Parsons at the end. Remember in season 3 when Laura Bennett with all her fabulous vintage LV luggage and her Manolos just walked right out of the studio and cruised the couple blocks home? Classic.

CLICK THE CONTINUE READING BUTTON TO READ THE REST!

Tim meets up with Kimberly in White Plains, MD. Tim can’t get over how fantastic she looks – I concur. Relaxed, comfortable, and confident. Kimberly explains her inspiration derives from her roots in “pre-gentrified Brooklyn” and she wants to do a collection that merges that era with the modern, current Brooklyn. She dubs it “Urban Girl Transformed.” Tim likes her collection but is leery of over complicating. He warns her to listen to her heart.

Next Tim travels to Trinidad to meet up with Anya. Love that he is still wearing his suit! Anya explains her desire to pursue fashion came from her brother, Pilar who passed away. Anya’s inspiration for her collection is water and the deep regions of the sea. She has designed and had made some of her own fabrics which look pretty fantastic hanging on the rack. Unfortunately that’s the only thing she has to show Tim as she hasn’t even designed one look!

I believe at this point it started to dawn on Anya that she was in way over her head. The judges continually adored her work – which had amazing ideas – but rarely gave her serious or helpful critique. She kept telling Tim that she could only “draw one shape” – I think she was sort of freaking out over the fact that she really only can construct one shape.

Tim is concerned (I love that he uses that word!). Tim encourages her to drape and work with Muslin instead. He also reminds her no sewing help is permitted. Oops. So yeah, take Bert’s number off the emergency speed dial!

From a beautiful island to a teeny walk-up on the fifth floor, Tim visits Viktor. Viktor is inspired by an “urban coast” aesthetic, particularly his trip to Mexico where he is from. Viktor wants the collection to memorialize his brother’s death (in Mexico). Tim loves the jacket Viktor made but is less wowed by the white dress and wants him to ditch it. Tim advises Viktor not to over-think.

Finally Eyebrows McSequin gets a piece of the Gunnster as Tim visits him in Queens. We meet his sister McKenzie McKinley. Josh shows Tim what he has and he admits he is a little “behind” on the collection.

Ok, basically Josh showed Tim every piece of neon polyester JoAnn Fabrics had and some vintage schizophrenic child’s bedsheets as the “main print” of his collection. Oh my lord – it was scary, insane, and garish! I think Tim literally froze in mid gasp. Tim suggests that perhaps using sherbet colored fabrics and a ludicrous print make the collection look cheap and gimmicky; a concept that clearly never occurred to le Joshi. JOSH’S FACE AT THAT MOMENT! AHAHAHAHA! It was priceless.

Tim advises him to discard at least 5 fabrics and wants to know where’s the sex? Poor Josh! You know Tim was saving up all these comments of his wretched taste that the judges kept pretending to like until the end when he dropped the “You have horrendous taste” bomb.

The designers return to Parsons for NY Fashion Week and are housed in an enormous penthouse and their new fancy workroom. Tim announces to the designers they will need to choose a 3-look mini collection for the judges. Then he begins his second round of critiques.

The meltdown moment comes in the form of Anya, whose lack of technical skill are not only really evident, but she is experiencing incredible self-doubt after seeing what everyone else put together. Anya decides to make some sort of a hideous bronze satin gown last minute but it’s a wreck. She also can’t properly fit one of her other dresses so she has to swap it out for a bathing suit, which also doesn’t fit. I don’t think this is all her fault – the judges led her to believe she could get by on a perspective without sewing technique and now it’s becoming clear to her that if she wants to be a serious designer that is not the case.

Mini Collection Time! There is no guest judge for this week.

Ok, let’s trash discuss some looks!

Viktor:

I like Viktor’s collection, but I do think it was heavily influenced by Nicolas Ghesquiere of Balenciaga. Of the four finalists his was far and above the best. It was very urban, chic, and wearable. Did anyone notice the amount of sucking up to the judges Viktor was doing? He was certainly doing whatever it took to win! It was very annoying to me that after the largely impeccable and really creative showing the judges were nit-picking over lame styling. No one cares about that! Is this Project Stylist? Were they seriously considering not sending him to fashion week over some badly placed sunglasses? They are delusional.

The first look had a great print and I really liked the way he used it with the scene at the top. I agree with the judges removing the leather zipper skirt (although I thought it was an interesting piece) really improved the look.

The second look was also interesting – I loved the effect he did where the entire back of the outfit was completely black. I thought the pants were a little ill-fitting and boxy, but the shirt was glorious and intricate.

The Third look. The effect was breathtaking and the dress was stunning. I thought the jacket was really fun and unique. And, I disagree with the judges, I liked it with the dress, but I wish the model would have taken it off at the end of the runway so we saw the dress with and without it. The lining on that jacket was also fantastic and it would have been a good showing to feature it.

Anya:

Oh boy. This was a mess through and through. The judges were clearly disappointed that their wunderkind didn’t pull it out last minute, but she kinda hasn’t been pulling it out all season so I’m not surprised. These looks were Anya – sort of expected beachy outfits with a very narrow point of view, but the construction was so bad! Michael was upset about the jewelry she used, but that was about the only thing I liked. Although I do think it was a bit too much with the clothes.

The First look: This was her best piece, but that’s not saying much. It was uneven in the bust for one thing and the fit was sloppy. Also the bunchy-ness of the fit cinched with the belt led me to believe there was very little tailoring or construction put into this. I did like the print and the idea behind it.

The Second look: Do I need to discuss? A badly fitted gaping swimsuit that made the model look pooch-y and a hospital gown. Next.

Third Look: HOT MESS AWARD! From the side, you can tell the construction is literally horrendous. Side boob, badly draped, practically stapled together. I think she tried to take Tim’s advice to drape, but it isn’t a natural skill for her and the effect was off. Also the material wasn’t right for what she wanted to achieve. The material gave me seizures! It was like a sheet from a Dynasty set. It was so heavy and shiny and tortured looking (I agree with Michael – tortured is the word!)

Kimberly:

I get what she was trying to convey it just looked so boring. There was no va-va-voom. The judges were right she definitely has a point of view and she can make clothes, it was just not exciting.

The First Look: This is ok, but yes the styling is awful. I just didn’t get the fit of those pants and the fabric choice for the shirt was ugly, but I love the way she did the back.

The second look: That skirt is over-worked and the shiny was too much. I don’t even remember the shirt the skirt was so distracting and ill-fitting and heavy. I know the bubble butt was intentional but it was poorly fitted and too voluminous.

The Third Look: Totally disco fabulous. Why didn’t she make that in the 70’s challenge? It was totally Diana Ross. It did have sex appeal without being trashy, I agree with Michael all Kim’s clothes tend to have that, but it just wasn’t that interesting since it’s been done so many times.

Eyebrows McSequins:

This was a mess, that the judges liked any of it was disappointing and I seriously question La Nina’s taste that she was giving him any props! Were we looking at the same clothes walking down the runway?! I give him points for unconventional materials (neoprene, plastic…) and construction, but it was all over the board, universally unflattering, and downright scary. The judges liked that Eyebrows had a perspective (I guess…) and actually had the best styling of the four (he did?). There’s no accounting for taste, I guess!

The First Look: The print on that tank was revolting. I don’t why he was so attracted to it. It did look cheap and ridiculous. Also it distracted from the jacket, which was actually really nice and wearable.

The Second Look: This was too much. Too many details, too much going on, and I had no idea where to look first. There was too also too much exposure – the low-cut, the open back, the short hemline. He took Tim’s advice too liberally: Too much sex, too many details.

The Third Look. Point blank one of the ugliest, tackiest, trashiest garments ever. Was he designing it for CoCo – Ice T’s wife? What was the rear entry here zipper? I am flabbergasted that ANYONE thought that looked in any way appealing and I am more shocked the judges are sending the person who made that muumuu with attached catsuit to fashion week! The material was so incredibly cheap and costume-y looking – like Halloween store drapes! What was it supposed to be a – a dominatrix apron? Who did he imagine wearing that? The plastic part was sorta neat, but was ruined by the rest of the ugly! And the back of that garment? The zipper, the peepholes, yikes!

Was anyone else completely annoyed that the judges kept ranting on and on about styling? They spent so much time on it and no one is interested. Is it because, as Tim pointed out, the designers mostly brought their own accessories and were NOT using the PR sponsored Piperlime Accessory wall? No that couldn’t be.

The judges pretend they don’t know who to choose when really they are thinking ‘oh crap – the only one up here who made anything decent that wouldn’t make us a laughing stock is Viktor’.

Eyebrows is announced first, when I don’t think he should have been announced at all. But at least he can sew! Viktor and Kimberly are also in leaving Anya to think she is out. And then FINAL TWIST! All FOUR designers will be showing at Mercedes Benz Fashion Week!!! Did you catch the frozen smile on Nina and Michael’s faces when Heidi announced that Anya was also going to fashion week? HA! #producerintervention

Eyebrows, true to form, is pissy and complaining – see he doesn’t consider Kim or Anya to be in the same talent pool as he is and doesn’t feel their “fuddy-duddy” clothes deserve the opportunity to show at Fashion Week with his “serious stuff”. Please stop. You’ve already embarrassed yourself on national television enough. I think all the spray tan has negatively affected your brain functioning capacity.

A couple of notes: Did anyone watch After The Runway and see where Anya mentioned her “intimate Tapes” scandal on the internet? That’s classier girl speak for SEX TAPE! Watch out Kim Kardashian – you might have a run for your money with this one!

One other thing, last week’s eliminated designer Laura Kathleen’s “decoy” collection is AMAZING. It’s a shame really that she missed out on the opportunity, because it was definitely the best of all the final collections. Although her work throughout the show was sub-par and boring, her collection is amazing and apparently she also designed all the bronze pieces and jewelry.

THOUGHTS ON THE FINAL FOUR (AGAIN)? WHO DO YOU HOPE WINS? THOUGHTS ON SHOW?

Eyebrows McSequins decides to start his day off right with a steaming hot cup of bitch café as he rants about how Anya doesn’t deserve to be here and calling her out on her inability to thread a sewing needle. While I don’t disagree, no one is calling McSequins out on his complete inability to edit. Oh wait…

HBIC Heidi Klum informs the designers they will be meeting the delightful, yet clearly over it, Tim Gunn on Governors Island for the details on the challenge. There, Tim informs the designers that Governors Island will serve as inspiration for a thee-look mini collection that features a variety of looks (i.e. can’t be three cocktail dresses). The designers are given 1 hour, a map, and a golf cart (is this Amazing Race or PR?) to explore the island and sketch. I kept waiting for a golf cart accident, but it didn’t happen.

Can we all have a moment for Eyebrows McSequins Palm Beach on Crack Bermuda shorts? Oooohhh…lordy. That print!

CLICK THE CONTINUE READING BUTTON TO READ THE REST!

Eyebrows decides he is inspired by Artillery chapels and stained glass windows. Kimberly chooses a sculpture called New Beginnings, Laura decides on a circle motif – specifically a crossing walk with a bicycle trail. Yes, really. Viktor finds his inspiration in structure with a silhouette of the cityscape in the background. And Anya decides the sculptures in general are inspiring.

At Mood, problems arise when Kimberly can’t find the color she is looking for and Laura’s bill totals $700 as she informs us she “likes the finer things in life.” Back in the workroom, Tim appears with the magic velvet bag and announces a fourth look! No just kidding, he actually announces they will be provided with assistants for this challenge and brings in the last five eliminated designers who are totes available for hire! Tim draws names from the bag to assign the order for which the designers get to select their assistant.

Kimberly chooses the easy to get along with and technically proficient Becky, foiling the producers idea that she and Eyebrows would go head to head in round 87. Becky proves to be the perfect choice for the indecisive Kim.

Laura chooses Anthony Ryan – which is a good solid pick, if nothing else because he’s adorable. Viktor in a total WTF moment chooses time-management challenged Olivier, but it turns out that despite his Debbie Downer personality they work well together and very quickly. Anya, that smartie pants, chooses the technical wizard Bert. Well, we know who is winning this one! Bryce lucks out and gets stuck with Eyebrows and his cray-cray refusal to edit. He’s crying silent tears.

McSequins begins living in his delusions again when he decides to throw every piece of glitter or rhinestone on a dress form while screaming “amazing!” as Bryce desperately tries to keep him in check. Without a glitter explosion to keep his angsty energy occupied he turns on former bestie Anya and starts ranting about her complete inability to sew anything at all. He is additionally furious that she was crowned last week’s winner and the recipient of $20K. Josh could have used that money to buy gallons of puff paint and satin! Overhearing, Anya rushes over to consult her fellow-mean girl Laura. You know, Eyebrows has some valid concerns… he’s just insane. Bryce, bless his heart, tries to keep him focused and positive.

Today’s meltdown moments come in the form of Laura and Kimberly who just cannot decide on an idea and run with it. Kimberly has made about 15 garments. She should have gone with with that ballgown’s top – it was lovely and paired it with chic pants. Laura is paralyzed by circular thinking – literally and obsessing about not making it to fashion week. Everything is going swimmingly for the woman who doesn’t know charmeuse from chiffon as Bert basically assumes the role of pattern maker, seamstress, and sewing teacher as Anya sort of dithers around telling Bert about her complicated ideas.

Tim is perplexed about several designers, but he has checked so far out of this season he just wearily waves his hand and says “carry on” while running in the back to sob about the state of his professional alliances based upon this show.

All three of the girls seem to be having major fit issues and Anya’s model is unfortunately wearing her dress backwards. That seems to be the only dress she actually worked on, so it makes sense. Her ideas were very strong, but they also seemed to be heavily influenced by Bert. Which is normal in a partnership, but Bert was supposed to be the assistant to her head designer. I don’t think it’s Anya’s fault – she has great ideas and a keen sense of natural style, but she just cannot execute her ideas at all and the judges constantly over-look what’s in front of them to focus on the potential.

The guest judge is Zoe Saldana! Esteemed fashion icon, who turns it out on the red carpet! Finally a good judge!

Ok, let’s trash discuss some looks!

There seems to be no Top Three and I don’t remember them actually declaring a winner for this challenge, just announcing who will be showing at fashion week. There was a loser, obviously, but we’ll get to that.

Eyebrows McSequins: First of all this “collection” if you want to call it that, had NO cohesion other than Joshua designing it. Second of all, two of the three looks were complete costumes and looked cheap. The white dress, was sensational and I loved the unconventional fabric – he used plastic of some sort. The white dress was chic, fun, and I suspect the use of the different materials (the chainmail and the plastic) were what moved him through into the top four. The judges are suckers for unusual done well.

The judges carped on him for that Statue of Liberty Halloween costume of a dress he made, particularly the unlined lurex (I am positive that was intentional on Josh’s part, by the way). Michael Kors described Josh as being a “magpie to glitter and shine.” He’s right actually! The second look was slutty, majorette, chearleader – I’m not sure what was going through his mind! Really, without the white dress, which everyone was ga-ga over, he was a goner.

I will say of Eyebrows, his technical skill is strong and when he edits (such as the white dress) he turns out some good, solid, cute looks – but he is his own worst enemy because he can’t tone it down and he can’t deflate his hubris!

Anya: The judges predictably loved everything she did and thought her collection was very modern. Although, I think that collection looked very Bert and they are always calling everything he does “dated.” Apparently not when Anya designs them!

I will say her collection was the most cohesive, visually appealing, and it told a story – the initial ideas were hers and Bert was instrumental in helping her tie everything together. My favorite piece was the red top with the black strap – really nice touch.

The judges practically had a stroke ranting on and on about how she pushed herself, styled the collection impeccably, went above and beyond, and how intricate and precise the construction and cuts were (COME ON, THEY KNEW BERT DID EVERYTHING!). I kept screaming at the TV: “Thanks to Bert!” I do think the styling was totally hers, but this collection was so out of her wheelhouse of flowing, beachy clothes it’s hard for me to imagine it wasn’t heavily influenced by her assistant’s aesthetic. Have a look-see at Bert’s Fashion Week collection for confirmation.

I did love the black dress, but the hemline was too extreme and the white gown had some issues, but was overall a very strong minimalist piece.

Viktor: This collection surprised me because it was so… blah and generic. I wonder if he was playing it safe, but technically amazing, because taking a risk would eat up his time and possibly compromise his chances of moving on. This collection, while excellently constructed and very cohesive, was very uninspired seeming.

Michael Kors was right to praise it as commercial – it was. We could all easily see those clothes in Banana Republic or Club Monaco right now. The black dress was very cute, but you know, we’ve seen it all before. The second look – I wasn’t crazy about the jacket mixed with the print. The third look was my favorite, but yes it was very executive assistant.

Kimberly: Barely moving forward into the final four, her collection was well… sort of all over the place. The skirt look and the dress were well-styled and well done, but the orange coat – yikes.

First of all the orange coat was dumpy and made the model look heavy. The color was garish. The ideas were there, but the empire waist made it look maternity and since the fit was really off, it just did nothing for the model’s figure. The second look was pretty cute, I actually liked the material she chose for the skirt and paired with the bright orange key-hole top was fun and spunky. The gathering at the hip was a little extreme and Nina thought she should have done a straight skirt, but Kim was right to point out that then they would have called her on just doing a boring skirt. Agreed. The third dress was adorable and I could see it on a red carpet any day. I loved it. Great concept, great styling, great construction.

Laura Kathleen: Laura had problems from the get-go. She was inspired by circles and chose a bevy of super pricy fabrics and had to put much of it back in order to afford the circular print that she wanted to dominate her collection. She initially planned to use the circles on all three pieces but Tim convinced her it was over-kill.

The first look was appalling. The skirt and jacket was like Winter Wonderland Barbie goes ice skating. It was really silly and unsophisticated and poorly done. The skirt was just a hot mess and so bad it actually distracted from the ridiculously over the top jacket! The second look with the little dress, was like a nightgown. The color was cute and I saw the potential but it was an afterthought because she ran out of time and the judges knew it. The ball gown had potential but was a mess of technical errors and over-reaching ideas. She did thoughtfully use the circles and the back was really fantastic.

The judges play their favorite game of pitting the designers against each other by making them explain why they should go to fashion week and who should go with them. Eyebrows McSequins takes off the bitchcrown and wants to suddenly take Anya with him. Probably because he thinks her sewing will doom her and move him one spot closer to the win. He’s obviously not getting that she could make 10 dresses out of aluminum foil and saran wrap and they would have an orgasm and dub her the winner and high priestess of all things fashion!

Everyone, in fact, wants to take Anya with them because of her innate vision and perspective.

The judges cite problems and strengths with all the designers. Laura knows how to make clothes flawlessly, but has some issues with point of view and range. Anya, well she can’t sew. Joshua needs to edit, edit, edit. Viktor surprised the judges, who were shocked that he was able to make saleable clothes for a commercial market, but they weren’t often wowed by his creativity. And Kimberly has a girl in mind that they understand, but her performance has been unpredictable throughout the show.

In the end Anya, is of course going to fashion week. Well, I hope she learns to put in a zipper by the time she gets to Lincoln Center!

Joining her will be Viktor and Eyebrows, who provides us with a long drawn out speech about writing his history and completing his memoir… yada, yada, yada. Just say thank you and move on! Kimberly and Laura were in the bottom two. And in the end weepy Laura was unfortunately sent home. Although I think her clothing was boring and often lacked taste in a serious way, I feel terrible that someone who has dreamed of fashion week her whole life was sent home. She was gracious and handled it professionally.

Thoughts on the episode and the final four? Did the judges make the right decision?

Heidi Klum issues the challenge clue: “Spread your wings!” and sends the designers into the workroom where Tim Gunn is with some … BIRDS! Oh, and Loreal Paris’ Collier Strong! Tim announces the birds will serve as inspiration for a high fashion runway look, which will correspond with Loreal’s new Take Flight make-up collection. The winning design will be featured in a Loreal Paris Advertorial in Marie Claire and the winning designer will also receive $20K.

Tim also announces the designers are working in pairs, but instead of being a team they are actually going head-to-head; one designer will be best look, and the other worst! Tim randomly draws names to choose teams: Besties, Anya and Laura, who will be using the raven for inspiration, Viktor and Kimberly who will be using a beautiful pink bird, and Bert and Eyebrows McSequins who will be basing their design on an Amazon Parrot.

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In the workroom, I notice the eternally chic Laura Kathleen is dressed like a hobo. Long dumpy skirts do not work on short girls (see: Simpson, Jessica).

At Mood, Anya decides to push herself by using a solid color palette to reference an all-black bird. So innovative! Joshua gets exactly the same colors as the bird and Viktor grabs zillions of feathers. At least Viktor has an interesting idea to feather chiffon and incorporate it with actual feathers.

Tim reveals there will be another dimension to the challenge: a second high fashion look inspired by their bird! Anya decides to do a structured dress, forgetting that she actually can’t put in a zipper or do any sort of complicated construction, which is why she always does a halter dress! Every challenge is just so much harder for Anya because it involves something she’s never done before! Did you know she’s never threaded a needle, either?!

Kimberly struggles to construct a garment totally out of her comfort zone and incurs a host of problems. First she stains her material, then she sews her finger to the machine, then she burns her dress and has to start all over and make a new one with three hours remaining! Poor Kimberly dissolves into a total meltdown, but Tim encourages her to stop thinking and just feel. Then he gives her a confidence-boosting hug and she manages to turn it around completely!

Tim returns to the workroom to give the designers a final twist! Only one of their two looks will walk the runway. The designers get to choose which garment to show the judges and the true challenge is their ability to edit!

Anya realizes she didn’t put in a closure in her dress, so she is literally cutting it open so the model can get it on and then sewing it back shut. Right. I’m just going to stop acknowledging the ridiculousness of her winning or even being on a show that was once about actual design. I’m pretty sure when she walks out onto the runway, the judges just look at her and think “ooooohhhh, pretty!” and automatically award her the win because she looks like a model. I’ll just continue to grade her on the curve like the judges do. Good job, Anya you cut your fabric in a straight line! Oh and you only used staples to attach the waistband instead of duct tape. Improvements! AMAZING! See you at Paris Couture week!

The guest judge is Francisco Costa, designer for Calvin Klein Women’s Wear.

The three teams go head to head. Team Matrix (Anya and Laura) Team Prom Dress (Viktor and Kim), and Team Malibu Barbie (Bert and Joshua). Seriously, none of these designers referenced the bird, they mimicked it exactly and used totally literal references. Oh, a the raven is a black mysterious bird, I’ll make a structured jacket in black! The only team that thought slightly outside the box, were Malibu Barbie.

Ok, let’s trash discuss some looks!

Bottom Three:

Auf Wiedersehen Bert! Well, this wasn’t Bert’s finest hour. He was uninspired by a stupid challenge to make a dress based on a bird that wasn’t supposed to look like a bird. Yeah, I was uninspired too. I will say that dress moved beautifully and the proportions were fantastic. I’m not sure what he was trying to do here, but it was a mess. The colors were murky and muddled. The bustier, while beautifully cut and super fun (loved the silver leather), was totally superhero. The slit was gynecological. It was just a mess and he didn’t even bother to defend it. The judges noticed the lack of inspiration immediately and while Heidi liked the idea of having the bright colors peeking out of the skirt, it didn’t work out. Heidi likes Bert. Should Bert have been the one to go home for a mildly uninspired but beautifully constructed garment? No. But you know, the judges are hell-bent on keeping the worst of the worst so Laura stayed.

Viktor: This had a lot of movement and visual interest, unfortunately it fell sort of flat and looked over-worked. It was kind of bunchy and bulky on one side, with the feathers oddly placed, and I can’t believe I am saying this but Viktor needed to take a step back from his big idea and evaluate his look – in other words he needed to edit and use constructive evaluation. All that detail on one side gave it a bathmatt-y feel and it did not look light and ethereal. Also, I agree with Francisco that it was too literal and the lack of balance made it lose it’s lightness. The technique of fraying the chiffon was nice. Also, I think he should have chosen a different color for the dress instead of white.

Laura Kathleen: Um… it’s like Laura Croft’s dress up suit. Those pants were too tight and poorly constructed. The material looked incredibly cheap.The jacket was silly and over-worked. The interpretation was far too literal and it looked like a movie villain’s costume. The entire look was silly, actually. She did think outside of her comfort zone, but she still gave us something that screams “taste issue” and following week after week of being on the bottom she definitely should not have stayed. I’m thinking La Nina was narrowly out-voted. Big disappointment here.

Top Three:

Congratulations Anya! I know I shouldn’t be taking it out on Anya that the judges love her and give her passes they would never, ever permit the other designers, but still it irks me. This look was just as literal and silly and over-done as Laura’s, yet the judges praised the overly dramatic and poorly rendered epaulets as amazing. Um… they were so enormous and the way they jettisoned out from the dress! The truly did look like wings! The skirt was bunchy and you could tell a mess. And she didn’t put an effing zipper in the garment. And the neckline was a wrinkled disaster that you know was incidental not purposeful.

I will say it’s her best look conceptually, so far, and there are a lot of interesting details with the fabric that provide depth, but still. I guess, considering all the crap up there this was the lesser of three evils, to a degree. I hope for the photoshoot somebody managed to sew a closure inside that thing so the poor model could actually get in and out without being cut out. They probably made Bert stay and do it. The judges should stop kissing her a$$ because she’s pretty and tells a good story.

And her simpering wheedling to Josh in the workroom following her win was pathetic and a true demonstration of her character. She knows she didn’t deserve to win, particularly when everyone else helped her week after week and after she refused to help Josh when he (yes, I agree inappropriately) asked to borrow fabric. Viktor has her number pegged and he knows to swim away from the sharks; swiftly, quietly, and without much splashing.

Kimberly: This felt pageant-y to me, but it did have a lot of elegant movement and I liked the little details like the leather waistband, the pearls, and cut-outs. She integrated them all well without it looking over-designed and silly. I don’t think she should have gotten a pass for pulling together something cute out in only three hours, since the construction had some seriously shoddy elements. But the concept and the instincts were fantastic. I wish she would have used a brighter color, but I guess you know she didn’t have time to reconsider! All in all, a nice, chic showing that would make a killer red carpet gown!

Eyebrows McSequins: Eeeehhh… cute dress, loved the chain detail, liked that he used a less literal color, but c’mom a draped Grecian mini? Done. To. Death. Also the fit was little tortured and boxy. Agreed with the judges that Destination Wedding Mother of the Bride corsage was a no.

During the judges deliberation, in which I was sure they were leaning towards boring and tasteless Laura who has been on the bottom time and time again; they ultimately decided Bert’s uninspired and generic dress was worse than Laura’s uninspired and over-designed suit. Bert’s exit was gracious, professional, and truly moving. Bert, I think you had a stunning collection at fashion week and you demonstrated an ability to make beautiful and timeless clothes! Oh yeah and your Piperlime dress from last week sold out in a matter of minutes!

This show is disgrace. Someone who can’t sew a zipper in a dress is winning week after week for poorly constructed, boring designs that have no excitement and no forward-thinking. I’m officially over Project Delusion. xoxo, Bertram!

Thoughts on the episode and challenge? Are you surprised by the results? Will you miss Bert as much as I will? Are you officially over the “Project Anya”?

On last night’s episode of Project Runway, the designers repeated the same challenge from the week before – except this time they got to use real models – and most of the looks STILL didn’t improve! Ok, just kidding – last week they weren’t supposed to be recreating bad 70’s Halloween costumes, they just all did, incidentally. BUT last night the challenge was to look to the past. Also, I’m just gonna put this out there – the winner and the loser essentially made the same thing…

Tim Gunn meets the designers in the workroom where he is standing with Heather Archibald, Head Apparel Designer for Piperlime.com. I don’t know if you were aware, based on the fact that they repeat it over and over, but Piperlime provides all the accessories for the show. The challenge is actually to make a sophisticated seventies INSPIRED (not recreated) look. And it has to be separates. The winning design will be produced and sold on – guess where? Piperlime!

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Tim emphasizes sophisticated again. Not literal, not vintage, but inspired by 1970’s fashions. Too late – in their minds nearly everyone ran towards big, earth colored prints completely ignoring the fantastic Halston/Calvin Klein 70’s – well, everyone but Bert, who worked at Halston. At Mood, Anya accidentally drops her money envelope and despite looking everywhere is unable to find it. Tim informs her of the options: get money from fellow designers or use muslin. Anthony Ryan gives her his $11 change and she is able to get one yard of cute-ish material, a zipper, and some buttons. Yikes! She ends up dying muslin through her tears.

Viktor informs us that Josh is a bit of a copy-catter in the workroom and he is not planning to help him at all by giving him any ideas. And sure enough, Josh makes a top with the same inverted pleat in the back as Viktor’s jacket. An unhappy Viktor states: “I’m not drivin’ you no more, Miss Daisy!”

The highlight of the episode was Bert revealing he partied at Studio 54. I would have been grilling him for Bianca Jagger drama all day!

Suddenly Tim appears and announces the designers will be responsible for a second look! And since most of them don’t have the creativity or ingenuity to handle one look, this is definitely putting them ovah the top. The second look must be one-piece (no separates, this time!). They have $50 and 15-minutes to sketch. Like a big girl, Anya safetypins her money to her blouse, so she won’t lose it again. Honey – it’s called a purse. Get one.

As Tim cruises the workroom looking to dispel some bad news, he gives Laura a little lecture about her “taste” upon seeing those chevrons mixed with an acid trip gone wrong. Tim warns Laura that Nina Garcia is questioning her taste and out. to. get. her. Laura is confused, because sometimes her taste is even “too refined.” Remember she has like the Neiman Marcus aesthetic…

The Guest Judge is Olivia Palermo who also happens to be a Piperlime Guest editor. I must say, after her less then intelligent behavior on The City, she shocked me by being an insightful, well-spoken, and knowledgeable judge. Whose brain did she steal? I also appreciated that she kept mentioning how things would photograph, which is an important concept, that none of the designers, save for Bert, considered. And then Heidi Klum stars the show!

Ok, let’s trash discuss some looks!

Kimberly:

Look 1: The floral print was really garish and mumu-esque. If you wanted to make a Mrs. Roper caftan this was your print! I really liked her original concept of a secretarial look, but something went wrong and she scrapped it for some reason. She should have also scrapped that floral fabric! Also, the shape was SIXTIES not seventies. The swing top was too voluminous and looked costumey. I was surprised she was safe.

Look 2: I think this look kept her in the safe zone. The pants were really beautiful and given adequate time and better time management, Kimberly is a very insightful and detailed designer. The fit issues on the top of this jumpsuit were a mess. The peekaboo at the waist looked accidental and bizarre. This look did embody the kind of casual, very movement oriented clothes of the decade.

Top Three:

Congratulations Anya! I am VERY confused by the win here. And I don’t even think I need to discuss why, I get that they were celebrating her “make it work” attitude, but this competition is about design. That jumpsuit was a mess and the first look – I am flabbergasted that THOSE pants and that ill-fitted disaster of a top were considered a contender for the win along side Viktor’s and Bert’s pieces! She was given the win because the judges like her and she is judges pet. Oh and they were into her whole sob story about the $11 look. Get over yourselves.

Look 1: The top was the color of hospital scrubs with a few pintucks and was gaping all over the front. It was nothing to get excited over. Also, those pants were a terrifying mess of poor construction, bad fit, and questionable styling. I liked the pattern though.

Look 2: And the jumpsuit – it was decent – I did really like the bust; it was sexy without being overly revealing. I liked the sheer in the back also, but the legs were ridiculously wide and unkempt. I don’t want to wear it right now as the judges claim all women do. And really, Anthony Ryan’s dress was essentially the same thing and he was sent home for being “boring” and frumpy. Nothing revolutionary to see here folks, keep moving! One more thing – her and Laura often use the same elements in their designs – both used chiffon. Interesting…

Bert:

Look 1: Holy HOT PANTS! Those were more like underwear! That model looked like an extra from Boogie Nights! This moved beautifully on the runway, the fabric was interesting and dynamic, and really it did make you feel vacation-y. I thought the judges were overly enthusiastic about this outfit as a whole but agreed with their consensus that the top was stunning and beautiful. And fun! I would buy it. Of course, Heidi liked the shorts… of course.

Look 2: This dress was the embodiment of the chic, breezy, relaxed seventies of Halston. It looked expensive and elegant; it was a perfect summer dress. I do agree with Michael Kors that Bert showcased two very important parts of seventies style: “streamlined and glamorama.” The construction was impeccable and Olivia was right to point out the little details that made it a stand out. I also liked that the visual interest was in the two different fabrics and no other details overtook the aesthetic. The judges aren’t calling your looks “dated” now! Although Bert did not win, Olivia announced his dress will be produced and sold on Piperlime as well.

Viktor:

Look 1: This was impeccably tailored, but the jacket was too boxy and looked like it was the wrong size for the model. It was beautiful though – and very well done for both the budget and the time! Viktor can work the magic. It was both referential and modern. I agree with the judges, that the t-shirt was the wrong choice under the jacket and he should have done a drapey halter instead. The snakeskin was a great idea – it’s both very trendy and was very popular in the 70’s. This look did majorly lack sex appeal which if he was going for YSL, should have been a no-brainer!

Look 2: He should have made a top like the one on the dress for under his jacket. This was a simple, easy look and both very modern and very vintage. The wrap dress was a great idea, but I noticed no one complained about him using black, which is apparently not a good choice for photographs (eye roll). I wasn’t totally crazy about the drastic asymmetrical hem – it looked a bit sloppy and rushed (because likely given the ridiculous time constraints it was). All in all good showing, V and you would have definitely been my pick for the win over sloppy britches, Anya!

Bottom Three:

Auf Wiedersehen Anthony Ryan! Oh my poor southern sassy pants got sent home for basically making the same garment that will be sold nationwide on Piperlime. I shall not be buying that!

Look 1: I agree this was a hot mess and all together too much. I’m not sure what he was going for with the skirt, it seemed 80’s to me not seventies and the bad upholstery fabric vest? Very confusing. I don’t even want to talk about the fit of that skirt – because it speaks for itself.

Olivia made the astute suggestion that he should have made skorts or culottes because WHO exactly over the age of 10 is wearing either of those things in 2011? If anything would have sent an big antenna up for the judges it would be making something extremely dated like culottes. But then again, what was Olivia wearing during judging? A Little House On The Prairie Skirt?

I liked the pattern on the tank top and did agree having sleeves would have improved it dramatically and made it more appropriate to the decade, but the look all together was wan and a mess. I didn’t find it as offensive as the judges did, but they seem a mite insane.

Look 2: The judges were horrified by this caftan, which is both very in and very similar to what Anya made – right down to the open back, the geometric earth-hued material, and super loose fit. I don’t thing either looks (hers or his) was “show stopping” or innovative, but I also don’t think this dress was the “cult member” horror show depicted by the apoplectic judges, who basically just wanted to give Anya the win because of her tough time. Joshua’s look was faaaar more offensive than this slightly ridiculous and over-sized rendering of a maxidress.

I also don’t think every single runway look needs to evoke sex appeal, and Michael was right to point out that Anthony Ryan was attempting to reference the early, hippy seventies which is clearly not a time appreciated by Heidi or Nina who were up in arms about how atrocious this dress was (did I hear Nina compare it to a Charles Mansion cult member dress? – a little OTT, Ninakins). Anyways, because he didn’t make hoochie wear or his name wasn’t Anya he was sent home.

Laura:

Look 1: In my mind, she was competing for Eyebrows McSequins for the worst looks on the runway and AR should have been safe. Both her looks were a garish eye-sore of ridiculous, tasteless, and bland. Nina was FREAKING OUT and rightly called the top a “prison uniform!” Those patterns were a hot mess! What was she thinking?! The Y-back seemed interesting, but up close it reminded me of something Debbie Gibson would be rocking on her mall tour! I also agree with Olivia – who could wear either of those thing without looking 10lbs heavier?!

Laura made the mistake of making “vintage” not updating the seventies. Both her looks were extremely dated and basically replicas of clothing from the decade.

Look 2: Not much better. Sloppy, over-worked, silly. Also drab. But once again, not much different from what Anya or AR created. This was pure replica at it’s worst.

Josh:

Look 1: Also in the what was he thinking category?! I think he was actually confusing 1977 with 1987! The blouse was a freak show, the colors were nauseating and those pants made me want to gouge my eyes out! If you can make a size 0, 5’10 woman’s ass look fat the rest of America is doomed. That he even considered sending that mess of bad taste, bad construction, uninspired, hideous crap down the runway was enough – he should have been sent home on the first bus home!

Look 2: This warrants no discussion. The top looked like a swimsuit and the print was Jimi Hendrix’s worst nightmare. I agree with Nina: “hor-ren-dous!” I thought Nina was going to need a paper bag to breathe into she was so upset. The producers demanded he stay for drama purposes and really it’s not worth it if we have to look at this schlock for another few weeks!

Hey, it’s not Josh’s fault he, like, wasn’t born in the 70’s!

After deliberation, which included more assignations about bad taste, Anthony Ryan was chosen to be sent home. Heidi looked very sad to send him home and I think she was gunning for Eyebrows to get the boot. Anthony left graciously and Eyebrows McSequins chose to make AR’s departure all about him by sobbing and dabbing his eyes oh so carefully to not smudge his make-up. Ugh.

Next week: Birds serve as the inspiration and cause all kinds of issues. The designers are competing against each other on a team or something and Kimberly and Anya are having issues which means one of them will win.

Thoughts on the episode? Were you shocked by the outcome? Are you so over Eyebrows McSequins and Laura Kathleen or is that just me?

On last night’s episode of Project Runway the designers made men’s wear for up and coming rock group, The Sheepdogs. Unfortunately ¾ of the designers had never sewn or cut a pattern before, let alone made men’s wear, and the other ¼ had only one concept of rock ‘n roll and that era ended before most of them were born!

Heidi Klum meets the designers on the runway and announces: “Image is everything!” before sending them on their way to meet Tim Gunn. When they arrive, Peter Butler, consulting stylist of Garnier is there with Tim. Apparently Garnier held a contest with Rolling Stone Magazine to find the next great, unsigned band. The winning band, The Sheepdogs, will be the models for this challenge and the designers have to help this band create a new image while also keeping it true to the musicians’ style. Did I mention they are ALL men?!

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The designers are randomly divided into two teams of four and each team must put together a look for the whole band, however each designer will be responsible for the head-to-toe look of one band member. Cohesion as a collection is not necessarily important, but Tim directs that the band members do need to look like they come from “the same planet.”

The winning look will be featured in a Marie Claire advertorial and worn in Rolling Stone. It will also be worn at a live Rolling Stone Magazine event.

Team Harmony: Anya, Laura, Anthony Ryan, and Bert. Laura is just so annoyed she is forced to work with Bert again and she lets us know this many times. Really, just get an “I Hate Bert Keeter!” button to wear around the workroom. Do you think the producers are telling her to strike up some anti-Bert vendetta for drama purposes? Anthony Ryan tries to see the positive in being saddled with Bert – he experienced the 70’s firsthand, but sadly his memory from that decade is a little foggy. A little too much Studio 54, Bert? The pairings are as followed: Anya and Sam, Laura and Leot, Bert and Ewan, and Anthony Ryan and Ryan

Team Untitled: Kimberly, Viktor, Eyebrows McSequins Joshua, and Moody Moments Olivier. This team doesn’t have any issues as a group. I give the credit to Kimberly, who pretty much refuses to start drama with anyone – even Joshua. The pairings are as followed: Kimberly and Sam, Viktor and Leot, Olivier and Ewan, and Joshua and Ryan.

The designers are given 30 minutes to sketch and choose their rocker and then they are off to Mood! At Mood Olivier starts things off wrong right by choosing his normal collection of slurry beiges – it must be very easy for him to shop there as he purchases the SAME materials every. single. time. Nothing says rock ‘n’ roll like chino!

Tim reveals that the individuals on each team who share a band member will meet together with Peter Butler to consult on the hairstyle. Those poor band members looked so appalled and confused during the styling product consultation!

Bert is in trouble and he reveals he only got 1.5 yards of fabric (why?!) and he isn’t even sure if he has enough to complete his garment. Bert decides to dye his fabric and is hoping for navy, but gets purplish and then mixes it with a purple liberty print floral shirt which Tim and poor Ewan deem “too feminine.”

Olivier has no interest in designing for his client at all, neither his size nor his fashion ideology. He chose wallpaper to construct the top (it had swans on it!!!). It was more figure skater than rockstar. Olivier, who is a MEN’S WEAR DESIGNER, complains about having to dress a “plus-sized” Ewan. Tim ends up assisting Olivier in the fitting of his pants after having a coronary at the sight of the crotchal/waistband region. Then Olivier leaves Ewan sitting on a stool in the workroom -in his underwear – for an hour while he sews something.

Tim announces there will be a Rock Concert fashion show! The Sheepdogs will play two songs, changing outfits in between songs.

The guest judge is Adam Lambert! He’s a good judge when Michael Kors stops trying to impress him with his zingy one-liners and let him get a word in edgewise.

Ok, let’s trash discuss some very dated, uninspired, cheesy costume looks!

Anthony Ryan – Well, it’s certainly 70’s! I liked the sheen on the pants, but I wish they were a little tighter. I think the print on the shirt was interesting, but the fringe vest was so Kenny Loggins. Truthfully it wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t good – it was pretty predictable, but well constructed. The print on the shirt was the only thing providing interest to the look. Heidi dubbed the look “ok,” but Michael described the pants as so polished it was a “Golden Girl goes rock ‘n roll moment.” Nina described the shirt as looking like “a woman’s blouse” and Adam liked the print of the shirt, but didn’t think it necessarily went with the pants.

Laura –I liked Laura’s t-shirt, but I’m not really sure about the color of the pants. Heidi and Adam loved this look. Heidi thought the fit of the pants was great and the fringe kind of worked. Adam thought it was 70’s but also contemporary. Michael and Nina did not like it. Michael wasn’t a fan of the tie-dye and thought Laura could have done more to push the look. Nina, well she hated it all. She actually said the jacket looked like a women’s blazer with a scarf purchased at the mall. The look on her face was PRICELESS when she was emphatically stating that she basically hated this whole look.

Top Three:

Congratulations Viktor! My first impression was ‘nice 80’s Chuck Norris Bomber Jacket’! Pleather is so cheap and terrible, even from afar. I was not loving the shirt, especially tucked into the pants – it was like business on the bottom and rocker hippie on top with the fringe jacket and the headband. Strangely the judges LOVED the jacket and praised it as expensive-looking. Adam, the only judge with musical experience (other than being married to Mr. Kiss From A Rose), praised that Viktor’s look had movement. Good point, Adam. Michael was excited that Viktor made “real jeans” and thought they were “sexy.” We have different opinions of ‘sexy’.

Josh: Once again, way too literal a 70’s reference, but I liked the pants (minus the back pockets). I loved the print of the tank, but then he covered it up in all that god-awful sloppy looking fringe. The vest could have been really great if he removed the fringe! Heidi loved almost all of it but the fringe. She also stated there was too much going on. Adam really liked the pants, and both Heidi and Adam loved the sex on a stick zipper. Truthfully I did too. It is very rock and roll and it is very hot in a Led Zeppelin sorta way. Nina, again, commented about Joshua’s proclivity to go overboard with “tricky” details and thought the outfit looked “unnatural.” Everyone really liked the tanktop.

Bert: All said and done, I kind of liked it. Bert was the only designer who did not totally copy 70′s fashions, but instead reinterpreted the style in a more modern way. I’m 100% positive it did not suit his client’s style, but the look itself was interesting. I agree with Heidi – I hated the braids! I also don’t think the shape of the pants suited Ewan’s body necessarily, but otherwise good showing Bertram! Bert said he wanted to stay away from bell-bottoms since he wore them originally, so he did a straight-legged, striped jean. Adam really liked the layering of the tops and Michael was shocked that Bert has a “rocker vibe.” He also commented that Bert gave Ewan something that was not a costume. While Heidi did not like the pigtails, Nina and Adam adored them and Heidi felt Bert gave Ewan an identity. I’m really shocked Nina was so into the braids….

Bottom Three:

Auf Wiedersehen Olivier: OLIVIER IS A MEN’S WEAR DESIGNER! I just had to repeat that again since this look was so terrible!

Poor Ewan. Oh that shirt! Olivier interpreted the challenge as wear men’s wear HE would want to wear. And sadly what he wears is not suitable for 70’s influenced rockstars – or anyone, really. The pants could have been OK with better fit, construction, and color. The color was shamefully awful and dull. Ewan was very tactful about offering feedback to the judges, but did admit he would have preferred a darker colored pant. Also, that shirt did not fit. The judges ripped Olivier a new one and were thoroughly unimpressed with this entire look. Heidi found it “really boring,” she also commented that the pants looked like “dad jeans.” And yes! I agree! Adam didn’t think anything fit and Nina described it as “too feminine.” Heidi made Olivier roll down the sleeves of his shirt only to discover it wasn’t finished and there were actually no cuffs! Olivier tried to blame the size discrepancies between Ewan and the mannequin, but Heidi quickly pointed out it was a time management issue instead! Busted!

Kimberly: I really did like the print on the fabric, but she busied it all up with the details. The trim on the neckline was unnecessary, the buttons were ridiculous, and I think she should have done something different entirely. The pants seemed to fit really well. Kimberly admitted to getting lost in the construction of the shirt and Sam agreed. The judges, who have vacillated on whether or not they like orange and brown, (sending Fallene home for the color combo and then rewarding Joshua with a win in the avant garde challenge for the same color pallete) decided in this challenge it was drab. All the judges had different ridiculous ways to describe Kimberly’s first foray into men’s wear; Michael dubbed it: “Peter Brady at the autumn harvest,” Nina: “old man’s pajamas laying around the house, dirty,” Adam: “Scooby-Doo, Where Are You?” and Heidi: “Forest Elf – Tinkerbell’s Boyfriend.” Kimberly remarked that Sam was lucky he was in a shirt and a pair of pants!

Anya: Ugh – bad Native American Halloween costume. She was right to call it sloppy – it was a complete sloppy mess! Nina and Heidi called it Pocahontas and way-too literal. After looking at the pants (which were splitting in the back), Michael pointed out that they finally got to see that Anya had only been sewing for four-months. Really it’s been obvious all along, except in a challenge when she couldn’t rely on floaty garments and prints it became abundantly obvious. Michael called this “reggae Jesus.” Adam referred to the tunic as looking like it came from an “8^th grade production of Hair” and explained that it didn’t look like fashion.

The judges ultimately decided that Viktor beat out Eyebrows McSequins and Bertram to take the win. Finally, after being the Susan Lucci of this season! After deliberating over who was the absolute worst designer on the runway, Kimberly was spared and Olivier was sent home.

Viktor is shown shooting his advertorial or whatever and after seeing that outfit again, I am more convinced than ever that it was just so suburban dad trying to look hip. It did not suit his rocker’s style at all; it was boring and middle-aged looking. I mean the jeans weren’t distressed – they were brand new with holes ripped in them! The jacket was super 80’s in a bad way (I actually just saw a lady on What Not To Wear getting that same jacket thrown away!). Of all the great designs Viktor has put out, I feel the judges rewarded him for his worst showing so far!

The real problem with this challenge was that NONE of the designers used any ingenuity or forward thinking, but instead went for refried, reheated, already done a zillion times stereotypical ideas of how a “rock star” should look (i.e. dull and cliché). This was teenaged boys start a rock band and try to dress the part before they can play the instruments. The band looked way hotter and way more rock star when they were wearing their OWN clothes than after they got their new image from the super-awesome Project Runway designers. These designers didn’t make clothes for rockstars, they made rockstar costumes and it was terrible.

The other thing is, none of these looks had any stage or sex appeal. Michael Kors kept referencing The Brady Bunch to describe the clothes on the runway – and precisely! They all looked like 70’s teen idols! Also, not modern, not hot, not interesting! They didn’t give these musicians a new image, they dressed them up like The Partridge Family.

Next week: The designers go back in time. Anya loses her money at Mood. And Laura spends more time critiquing Bert than she does working until Tim sets her straight!

Thoughts on the episode? Was Olivier and his sizism the right choice to be auf’d? Out of the three top looks, which one did you think deserved the win?

It’s the eighth episode of Project Runway, and sadly I am super over this season of catty queens, annoying team challenges, lack of ingenuity, and judges who are treating this like a popularity contest instead of a design competition. But with Tim Gunn as my lighthouse, I will carry on. This week’s episode was an unconventional model challenge and some of the designers displayed the charisma of the wad of tissues they were using to wipe their crying eyes after being told they had to dress *gasp* REAL WOMEN. Ugh. Fashion is just so not about people and their weird sticky-outy appendages! Boobs are the enemy of the effete gay-kind!

The designers meet Heidi Klum on the runway where she announces there will be no models for this challenge and a parade of men troop out. The designers have a series of strokes and Eyebrows McSequins gloats about how he actually does menswear?! Ummm… do most men want to wear manks with zippers and neon stripes!?

Heidi announces there will be no more immunity going forward, but since Anya won immunity last week, she gets to choose her man-model first. Then they draw names from the button bag. Joshua chooses Joshua and Olivier expresses his displeasure about fatties – fatties are allowed to exist, but not where fashion is concerned. The designers and their men meet Tim back at the workroom, where he reveals the challenge is actually to create a look for the men’s better halves – who will be serving as the models for this challenge with the men consulting on the designs!

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The designers interview the very clueless male partners who apparently have never observed anything their significant others wear if it isn’t in the lingerie category! The men accompany the designers to Mood to help select fabric, then it’s back to the workroom where the women-models arrive to give their two-cents.

Olivier has a complete fear of the female anatomy – specifically boobies! So he gets Suzanne and her DD’s. Back in the workroom, Oliver has another challenge – he really doesn’t know how to work with clients and just wants them to “shut up.” Because of this Olivier gets an out-spoken, opinionated couple who really want to collaborate. Remember, Olivier only does his aesthetic – no matter how much people dislike it! Oliver has lots of issues with Suzanne, whose style seems more Dynasty, than: drab, sad, muted, with weird complicated details. Olivier decides to make her some sort of orgami-style top (and she asks for a flowy sleeve attached!) with TERRIBLY fitting MC Hammer Pants that gave her perma-wedgie. He’s just so annoyed – all he wants to do is make clothes for non-speaking, flat-chested persons, dammit! Olivier also works incredibly slow, which is troublesome for his high-energy couple! Tim critiqued the colors as “crayon,” and is very concerned.

Joshua’s Josh keeps pushing simple for his girlfriend Charlene, but McSequins keeps pushing lace. Joshua eventually compromises with a low back, but conservative front with lace details. And shockingly he was able to get his bedazzler surgically removed long enough to create a dress that doesn’t look like an explosion of the discount bead bin at Michael’s. Seriously – he is like Edward Scissorhands with a bedazzler and a glue gun attached to each wrist! He tried to schlep on some metallic squares he bought when partner Josh wasn’t looking, but model Charlene put her foot down wisely. I like a girl who knows her look – even when that girl is Joshua M! – you can take the girl out of the sequins, but you can’t take the sequins out of the girl!

Bert’s designer is obsessed with boobs. His only requirement is that his wife’s ample assets be fully displayed. His wife, on the other hand, doesn’t want to be arrested for indecent exposure, but she’s ok with a decent amount of cleavage AND a mini skirt! Oh boy…

Laura’s client is adorable and wants to be Barbie! And Laura does too, so match made in cheesy Heaven! Anthony Ryan is replicating his client’s wife’s favorite red dress that was lost in an airport, but it’s not really his aesthetic.

Bryce ended up with a couple who LOVES pink! Bryce’s material looks a little anti-diarrhea medicine, according to Viktor, so Bryce dyes it a deeper hot pink. He struggles through making decisions about constructing the dress until he is very low on time and has to basically throw something together.

The designers are rushing to finish and Bryce ends up remaking his dress at the last minute and Olivier has to completely re-stitch his pants so his poor model doesn’t have a wedgie on the runway. Olivier and Kimberly end up sewing until the last second when Tim demands needles down!

The guest judge is actress Malin Ackermann, who was actually very talkative and provided a lot of ‘I would wear that(s)’.

Ok, let’s trash discuss some looks!

Laura: The bodice with the off-kilter strap was basically a direct replica of Vivienne Westwood, but I loved it. The color is gorgeous on her model and it moved beautifully on the runway, but the hankerchief hemline was distractingly variant. The drastically different lengths looked sloppy and combined with the intricate bodice, it was too much going on. Basically you want your eyes to know where to look and if the bottom was a little less chaotic we would look directly at the most interesting portion of the dress. This dress screams RHOC – could you not see Tamra Barney rocking this?

Kimberly: Her model loved this and was working it to high heaven on the runway – which is great! This fit well and the detail at the neckline which was interesting, but I think the skirt was tooo short and tight. I though there was too much tight in general and then the big explosion neckline. I am not loving this look, but you can see the elements of Kimberly coming out which was nice. She clearly worked well with her clients and worked hard to integrate her perspectives with their ideas.

Olivier: This looked better than I was expecting, but it was SO matronly and unflattering! His model, despite all the issues, sold this look and did an excellent job. The colors were so drab and although I liked the cigarette style hammer pant in theory, they were poorly constructed with a wonky crotch.The distracting tea-stained color, used napkin effect of the shirt hanging over the hip was too much volume going on in one area. I just don’t think this look excelled at all. The tailoring of the shirt was nice, but the pants killed it. Really, he was spared because of last week’s jacket, which Michael was obsessive over.

Top Three:

Congratulations Eyebrows McSequins: This was glamorous, chic, and elegant – also timeless. Michael Kors called Charlene a “modern Grace Kelly” causing her to squeal. Michael, also, surprisingly liked Josh’s styling choices – a first – and was happy the shoe gave it some personality. Um… no. A teal pump was ridiculous – a different bright shoe, yes, but pumps, no – especially paired with the 1950s prom queen hair and make-up. Nina Garcia was thrilled and felt it could work in other colors, too. Nina was also impressed he edited, and felt he highlighted everything beautiful about his client’s body.

The judges were thrilled the sequins were absent, but the dress was still sassy. The clients were very happy. The fact that Joshua worked so well with his clients and was able to both deliver what they wanted and retain portions of his own aesthetic and vision demonstrates that his behavior during the team challenges was purely an act of someone who uses posturing, intimidation, and histrionics to get what they want by steamrolling over people.

Viktor: ADORABLE! This was modern, fun, and chic! I loved the skirt and she was SUCH a great model! The clients loved this and so did the judges. Heidi called it “very fashion” Malin praised the “beautiful lines.” Michael felt it was over accessorized and it distracted from the amazing look. Nina called it “charming” and felt it was nicely balanced, without being too girlie. The judges loved the color combination and liked that it was separates, but nixed the purse as “too much.”

Anya: This was costume-y, but because she can do no wrong in the eyes of the judges they failed to look at this objectively. The asymmetrical hemline on the skirt was over the top, unsophisticated, and choppy. The sleeve was just silly, but I loved the sheer piping and the belt. I thought the look was kind of all over the place – like your bathrobe got caught in something and you came out missing a sleeve and half the bottom! It looked haphazard and it was poorly constructed, she uses prints and accessories to hide construction issues – which is smart.

The print is done to death. Michael thought it was “memorable” and he liked the “culture clash” and Heidi thought it was unusual. Nina found the sleeve over-whelming. Malin loved it, called it bold but classy, and wanted to wear it WITH sleeve on the red carpet. Right now her stylist is having a conniption fit.

Bottom Three:

Auf Wiedersehen Bryce: What a cute sillouette that went horribly awry. This was very Narciso Rodriguez in style, but Nina was right to call it out on having “too many details,” and commented about “the dress was wearing [Janine] her.” I did love the idea of the pockets, and so did Malin, but they over-powered an already busy dress by being too voluminous at the hip and thigh. The windowpane back could have been stunning. The fit was a mess and the construction was terrible. This could have been a chic little summer dress, perfect for day-to-night, but the fabric was a wrinkled mess, the bust and back were gaping, it didn’t fit through the hip and skirt, and the pockets were like two albatrosses stapled to the front. Bryce’s clients were thrilled with this and felt he really listened to their wants. Agreed, he did. I liked the color and was shocked all the other designers were so worked up about the hue.

Anthony Ryan: 1970s Tennis Dress. This was incredibly uninspired – he went too far in meeting the clients’ demands and he knew it. Anthony was going for retro and the clients adored it! Heidi thought it looked a “little, little girl or a very old woman,” and wanted more sex appeal. Nina was concerned that the wide white belt made it look like the model had no waist. Michael dubbed it “superhero ice skater” and thought the quirky he was going for didn’t come off. Heidi called it “super safe and super boring” I guess the only super this dress wasn’t, was just plain super!

Bert: Bert’s clients loved this look and were confused about why they were on the bottom. They defended Bert through and through! Michael called it “very safe” and Nina thought it was a little Heidi “a little short, a little tight, and a little shiny.” All the judges felt it was a dress that could be found anywhere. I agree this was very generic, although the construction and fit were phenomenal. The shape was good for her figure and emphasized her breasts without being hoochie. But this was so simple and uninspired.

The client may have adored it, but the client generally has less of a grasp of fashion and style than the designer, which means Bert was the “expert” and should have done more to amp up this look. I wish he had gone a little further with it so it didn’t read “available at major retailers near you!” I did like the textile, but that wasn’t enough to carry this into the ‘interesting and worthy of a second look’ category.

During judges’ deliberation, Michael obsessed about Anya and her “gallerina” calling her look: “fashion with a capital F” and “the most runway thing” they had seen. Ummm… Michael is seeing some very different fashion from me! Heidi like the color of Bryce’s dress, but didn’t think that was enough to save it from being an over-all disaster. Michael got his manties in s bunch over B for Boring, Bert, and is tired of wanting more from him. I do want to see what Bert has – he seems the most technically proficient and he always, ALWAYS plays it safe! They were confused about who Anthony Ryan was dressing and thought it was “old person home.”

In the end, Eyebrows was chosen as the winner, and humble about it he was not, as he crowed about being the only person to have two wins under his belt. Bryce was sent to the workroom to clean up his space for his hot pink burlap sack dress with schlumpy pockets. Well if there is one thing you don’t want to show Heidi – it’s frumpy, dumpy, and sad! Lord knows she needs a bit of sass and flash to get her through the day.

Best of luck Bryce, let the Gaga inspire you!

Next week: GLAMBERT is the guest judge!! There are MORE TEAMS!! And this time they really do have to design for men, but the crotches are an issue.

Did you enjoy this challenge – kind of fun, no? Were you surprised Bryce was chosen over Anthony Ryan to go home? What did you think of Anya’s look?

It’s the seventh episode of what is officially the most boring crop of Project Runway designers – fashion wise – in the history of the show. Perhaps that’s just my opinion, but I’m the writer here, so I get to give it. Sadly in this episode there was a ticking time-bomb named Joshua and cursing is just soooo unattractive to him! It also included a lot of ugly prints, a lot of neon, and a completely befuddled fashion editor who broke her stone-cold b!tch face for a few obvious glares and shocked expression.

Things began with Joshua M waking up on the bitchy side of the bed! Heidi announces there will be another team challenge and everyone groans and wonders when the horror will cease. This time the designers must work in two teams of five to produce a cohesive collection of textiles they created on the HP Intel Touchsmart Pads. Each team must have five looks and three must incorporate the custom created textiles.

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Oh, and there will be no official team leaders for the challenge, just simply straight up collaboration, which is pretty much a joke. Since Anthony Ryan won last weeks Notvant Garde challenge he gets to choose his teammate first and of course he chooses Anya, cause she’s pretty. Second place finisher (second place is the first loser!) Joshua gets to pick next and he picks Laura, cause she’s pretty. Finally the only person left standing is Queen Mum, Bert and he gets stuck with the most dramatic team ever: Joshua, Laura, poor Kimberly, and Becky. All the less crazy people are on the other team.

Back in the workroom Tim Gunn informs them they must formulate a runway show with music and video backdrop to accompany their looks. Tim then announces another surprise – Betsey Johnson – what is she like pimping out leopard print, charm encrusted touch screens now? Anyways, she’s supposed to be advising designers on developing a creative process or something. Ok… shouldn’t these “artistes” already have a creative process? Then the designers look at a Betsy show on the tee vee, so of course they’ll all be knocking off her looks. Or rather Joshua will be.

After Betsey “inspires” them they are given 30 minutes to come up with an idea and a team name and then 45 minutes to make fabric on the HP Touchscreen. Anthony Ryan’s team immediately decides he is the team leader that’s not really the team leader, so they go with his idea in 2 seconds flat. How about inkblots?! That’s original! Ok, Inkblots!!!!!!!! So that’s settled. They also decide to call themselves Team Chaos, but really they should have been Team Cliché.

On Team Ridiculous, Joshua has clearly decided in his overly Aqua Netted deluded head that HE is in charge because he thinks he should be and naturally his super creative idea is: VILLAGE PEOPLE?! Bert who remembers from experience how incredibly lame they were in their heyday definitely isn’t down with that – especially because Queen Sparkles can’t even remember all the members of the group. Since his precious idea was shot down Joshua instantly morphs into super douche! Team Ridiculous bandies around from Village People to Sea Ameobas to Clocks with Nuts and Bolts and color pops? Oh, and they are calling themselves: Team Nuts and Bolts. It should have just been Team Nuts.

Then Queen Sequins McDouchebag explodes into a glittery rage because Bert can’t work the HP Touchstupid printer and his friggin’ clocks don’t print. And it was uglier than Joshua’s eyebrows or their prints – was threatening to ‘forfeit’ cause Bert may have cursed? To calm him down Laura goes with Josh to make their video, while the remaining team members head to Mood. Joshua has the brilliant idea to make a Maybelline commercial circa 1995 and have Laura act as the Nikki Taylor character jumping in and out of cabs and running down the street in heels, but he’s only showing her feet – and his in some insanely um…bold yellow pumps.

Team Cliché decides to head to Times Square where there’s, like, lots of chaos, and film people walking and puddles. Then make a split screen kaleidoscope like an MTV music video circa 1995. Surprisingly, neither teams use color when creating their prints.

Joshua eventually apologizes for his tantrum, calls his dad and cries, and gets on with things. The truth comes out that Josh’s mom’s birthday happened and clearly that was behind his emotional breakdown.

Because Becky is given little to work with in the form of material, she ends up making a “Judy Jetson Vaccuuming skirt”which Laura decides to complain to fellow mean girl, Anya, about. Luckily Anya is on hand to mediate Laura and Becky’s disgreement about the skirt. Yes, luckily. Even with Becky agreeing to change her skirt, the collection is a terrible hot mess and Tim practically has a seizure when he sees it. In the vague hope they can pull something better together, Tim acts as a spiritual healer and makes them join hands and pray that this collection improves. It didn’t, but moving on. While Team Ridiculous was bickering and sobbing, Team Cliché was hand dyeing Rorschach blotches.

The guest Judges are Fashion Designer, Rachel Roy and actress, Rose Byrne whose knowledge of fashion is about -3, so that’s fun!

Ok, let’s trash discuss some looks!

Winning Team – Team Chaos:

Initially it seemed like this collection would be super cliché, but it actually turned out really well. The prints were eye-catching and surprisingly engaging. This truly was a collection, for the most part, and it is no surprise that they won. All five looks told a story from start to finish around a permeating theme. They didn’t just rely on the color story to tie everything together, but really listened to Betsy Johnson’s advice to think about the girl – where is she going and what will she be wearing. The items fit together and could be interchanged with each other. Meaning Olivier’s jacket could be worn with Anya’s dress and it wouldn’t look absurd. I thought this was good work and clearly they communicated well and decided upon a central theme that they did not deviate from. Also, I really actually loved some of those prints.

Congratulations Anya: After the judges didn’t really comment much on her dress, she was declared the winner. Why? Anya’s strengths are that she can lead people and she has a very strong point of view that she never deviates from, but isn’t hampered by (unlike Olivier). This was cute enough, but a little generic and the black cap sleeves didn’t work. She should have removed them and just left it sleeveless – they were too distracting on an already busy dress with two vibrant prints. The shape was nice and the back detail was interesting, although the zipper looked a mess. The dress wasn’t much to get worked up about though. And who, for a second, believes she was only sewing for FOUR MONTHS before coming on Project Runway?

Bryce: I actually thought this was cute and very on trend. Michael thought it was too mall clothes, but I think it was sophisticated enough for running errands or going to the park. The shirt was adorable, especially with the low back and the shorts are very wearable and well constructed. Once again, nothing to get your panties in a bunch over, but cute enough and eye catching.

Anthony Ryan: You can see it in Nina’s eyes that she recognizes the Prada influence all over this, but frankly, who cares. It was innovative by Project Runway standards but still trendy and ready-to-wear enough for the judges to get it. The elements would work separate or together, which is a big plus. It was graphic, unusual, and really showcased both prints and his talents. Normally I hate, HATE a pussy bow, but I didn’t totally mind it here. I thought this was great. The skirt was really grabbing and really, the man can sew. Very crisp.

Olivier: It was good that the team ONLY used black and white and did not force Olivier to work with any colors because he just can’t handle that avant-garde stuff. Anyways, this jacket is pretty much a reiteration of all his past work, but because he had more time and more space to work on it, it is well-rendered and impeccable. Michael was really excited about the tailoring and about finally getting to see the Olivier he believed was in there following week after week of complete duds. Nina wants it. The jacket with its 40’s influences (although it didn’t necessarily correspond to the collection), fit really well and the peplum effect was elegant and interesting. The pants, on the otherhand, were a sloppy, ill-conceived mess and they really didn’t work with the jacket, to me.

Viktor: Nice work. Riveting and interesting. The Rorschach pattern on the bodice looked like floral from afar, but also possibly ribs and organs. Great effect. I’m so happy he didn’t add red to the dress. The black and white was striking. The dress fit impeccably and was a perfect way to end the collection. I loved the sheer shoulders and back.

Losing Team: Team Nuts and Bolts:

First of all, their conception was atrocious – they had no idea what story they wanted to tell and the collection was supremely uninspired. Their fabric looked like it took 2.5 seconds of writing some numbers or letters on white sheets with a sharpie (i.e. incredibly amateur and unsophisticated) to create – it also managed to be a complete Stephen Sprouse knockoff! Sadly, Bert’s print was the most interesting, but Joshua’s vendetta prevented it from being included and we got his hand written “I LOVE ME!” “canceled / delayed” ‘graffiti, badly knocked-off, schlock. Also why did they use chartreuse! Such an odd color choice, especially in satin. Eeks. As for cohesion – color does not make a collection cohesive. Did you see Nina glowering when all the models walked out together? I burst out laughing. Oh, I love La Nina! Michael was right to call this “literal” – it was. It lacked finesse and sophistication; the theme here was really “everything’s a mess!” The judges were concerned that no leader emerged (in a challenge where they emphatically stated there was no team leader), although I saw their point – naturally someone should be chosen to steer this boat to victory, this team was operating under subsequent tyranny and anarchy.

Auf Wiedersehen Becky: Well, the jacket was ok, but everything else was a big ol mess of cheap looking Forever 21 clothes. Michael called it “nothing.” The only thing holding the jacket together stylistically was the sleeves. The lapels were ridiculous, but the construction was good. Really the prints on the custom fabrics are so distractingly ugly and generic it’s a crime to even have incorporated them. The judges were bored of her looks and didn’t think any design actually went into her outfit (agreed!)

Joshua: Well there were a lot of details – A. Lot. It was confusing and chaotic. Essentially this was part 80’s nightmare, part clown suit. That jacket was so Moschino eighties, it’s not funny. And the pants were just badly cut, badly assembled, and badly thought out. All around mess. Joshua got called out by the judges for picking fights again, which was interesting considering last time he threw a big drama queen bitchfit and harrased his teammate he was rewarded with a supremely inappropriate win for LEADERSHIP, of all things. Nina also questioned his taste level (finally! Because it’s poor!).

Bert – Well, because the fabric was essentially a white bedsheet with some crummy gears on it (reminding me of a little kids sheet), the dress was toga-ish – sci-fi toga. I did like the idea behind it – the dress, not the fabric – and the length is very modern. The zipper was a wee bit Matrix to me, although I liked it, but I loved the way he did the one strap detail in the back with the knot and the seaming was excellent. Bert really, really can sew; but for such a veteran he should have jumped up and lead this team to better cohesion, although I’m not sure how much he could have with hurricane hissyfit Joshua in the way!

Kimberly: I don’t get this skirt at all, even the construction looked poor. It was too tight and I don’t get the bunching of the materials. What was she trying to achieve with this skirt? The style and the fabric do not correspond with the collection at all. The length was pure gynecological (Heidi made a mental note to steal this one off the mannequin) and it looked like a diaper! And the dance club chains hanging on the back of that shirt? C’mon Kimberly. That is a high school kid making her own clothes to go to parties in! The belt or the waistband looked like it could be of some interest, but all the bunching of the material from the skirt pretty and top much obscured it and we missed the effect. Kimberly really needed to edit and sadly she got too lost in a point of view she thought she was conveying – the one of trying to distance herself from this disaster of a collection – and she went overboard.

There were no photos of this look available - sorry it's so small!

Laura: I Dream of Jeanie except Jeanie had a nightmare and got stuck with this. The belt thing just destroys the effect of an otherwise nondescript but competently sewn jumpsuit no one would wear, because really no one wears a shiny, bright blue satin jumpsuit ever. Also, what was going on in the bodice – it did not fit in the bust area and was sort of gaping and hanging awkwardly. The back looked nice, though.

In the end, Joshua was vaguely spared, but the judges now have a spotlight on him because they perceive him as a bully and Nina is starting to realize he has garish, horrific taste (that shirt he wore to the runway show didn’t help things!). Best of luck Becky – at least you don’t have to deal with Joshua anymore!

Next Week: The designers must make a look for some ordinary women after receiving direction from their husbands. Oh, boy…

Thoughts on the episode? Did Joshua deserve to be sent to a mental health facility home for his outburst? Were you surprised by Anya’s win? Do you believe she has only been sewing for a few months?