Reality Tea is ranking ALL the Housewives from every season and every city! Our list is broken down into three parts with Housewives ranked from worst to ‘best’ (or best of the worst, if you will). Below is Part 1.
What makes a superior species of Housewives? Is it class? Money? Fabulous plastic surgery and good shoes? Beautiful home? A revolving door of crazy that keeps us on our cheaply-clad toes? Is it a supportive husband? An in-home zoo of fabulous miniature fluff balls clad in their own designer wardrobe? Is it a witty zinger or indispensable advice? Is it their ability to rewrite history without irony? To crack open the egg of their emotional travails in front of cameras? Or is it their ability to deftly control the scenery while cracking a Chanel whip?
Erika shares that she’s not a big fan of LVP‘s humor. “Lisa Vanderpump is talking about British humor again at the pre-White Party get-together. She often defends her snarky remarks as being “British humor,” but she also describes this humor as being “way more aggressive.” So, are you trying to be funny or aggressive? I love a good joke just as much as the next person, but this “humor” often feels like thinly veiled insults.”
According to Dorit, that in addition to being truly special friends with LVP, they are two peas in a pod. “You don’t come across a lot of people in life who you can count on and connect with. It’s great to be so playful with Lisa,” she shares. “I just love her and I can’t stop laughing most of the time.”
Lipsa wasn’t present for Panty Gate, or should I say ‘Oops I forgot my panties gate,’ because she was in NYC pimpmomagering Delilah’s modeling career and advising Kyle Richards on what not to wear (I wish!).
Eileen starts off addressing the many painful losses her family suffered in a very short amount of time. “Going up to my mother’s house for the last time felt like a final goodbye to her. Even though I hold my mother in my heart, letting go of her things and her home felt like another way I was losing her.”
Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills always gives us a glimpse of the rare and finer things in life, right?! All the finer things… from fine China to the family jewels…
Lisa Rinna is off to New York to launch Delilah’s career as the next Gigi Hadid. Of course, Lisa acknowledges that Yolanda would have been a great ally and mentor right about now, so too bad about that Munchausen accusation last season. But let’s not dwell on the past, now. Let’s focus on how Lipsa is flying into her (and Delilah’s) future.
In NY, Lipsa meets up with Kyle Richards, who is opening yet another Kyle By KaftansToo (?!?!?!?!) all while wearing yet another goofy, incomprehensible outfit. Shouldn’t she call them like Kyle By MumusForever just for variety?
The uninhibited Miss Jayne attends cocktails sans undies, and accidentally gives everyone a peek of her vajaynejay. No one takes more peeks than Dorit Kemsley‘s husband PK (henceforth known as Peek-K). This does not sit well Dorit who is aghast at Erika’s lack of manners. Lisa Vanderpump, meanwhile, merely cackles.
In this week’s blog, Dorit counts her many blessings, which include pampering from hubby PK by way of her extravagant fortieth birthday party, and the cherished visit from her parents. “At first I was dreading my birthday, but with PK by my side, I knew things would be OK. Inviting my parents out for the special occasion was really important to me. I absolutely adore my parents and had to have them here to celebrate with us…I truly treasure the time we get to spend together and seeing them with their grandchildren.”