1) They do not know the definition of the word "hypocrite" (I think this is a trait that expands across all Housewives domains).
2) They don't understand "good manners" (Minding your Ps & Qs is not a Housewives forte).
3) They are baaaad actresses!
With that being said, let's dive into this nonsense and rip apart the episode. It all begins with Joanna Krupa dry humping Romain Zago in front of their braaaand neeeeew rented swimming pool!
Romain is on a mission to surprise Joanna left and right on Bravo's dime for a storyline. I mean Joanna needs to serve some purpose on this show besides looking amazing and hating Adriana de Moura, right?! First Romain surprised her with a car and now a new house he rented for them to live in as husband and wife.
Real Housewives of Miami held steady at 1.3 million. Meanwhile, Bravo's surprise (to me) hit Below Deck attracted its largest audience yet, with 1.75 million viewers. That's up 200,000 from last week's 1.55 million.
Finally, 1.810 million viewers checked out the series premiere of Teen Mom 3, but only 1.554 million stuck around for the second episode. I'm not surprised roughly 250,000 viewers checked out. Two hours of any new series is overkill.
Well, another Real Housewives friendship bit the dust! Last night on Real Housewives of Miami two long-time friends fell apart over one massive lie and a whole buncha excuses.
Adriana de Moura and Lea Black are continuing their argument from last week. Attempting a Breakfast At Tiffany's drama queen moment Adriana goes to stand out in the rain while she desperately calls a taxi. Did she pawn her car to pay for Chanel? I mean the Bank of Lea is now officially closed…
Lea comes out to woo Adriana back inside where they continue bickering about how Ana attacked Lea at least season's reunion and how Lea decided to be friends with Joanna Krupa even though she's Adriana's mortal enemy. Adriana doesn't believe Lea should have any sort of relationship with "Ho-anna". And then Lea hits Adriana where it really hurts: "Why are you so jealous of Joanna?"
We reported a few months back that two properties Karent owns (she said they were failed income properties) were being foreclosed upon by their lending agents. Well unfortunately Karent was unable to save one of them!
Real Housewives Of Miami star Adriana de Moura recently teamed up with PETA, posing naked in a bathtub to bring awareness to whales being kept in captivity – more specifically "Lolita" from Miami's Seaquarium. This week the reality star made a trip to San Juan Islands in Washington to visit the capture site of the orcas she's fighting to free.
Adriana shared photos and narration of her trip on Twitter. "Excited! @peta Heading to deep nature – to see orca whales in their natural habitat #lolita." Adriana was a little anxious about boarding the small plane (those are the best kind!!). She shared about the photo below, "This is a tiny plane!! 6 people only – flying towards Canada in search of #lolita's relatives. The adventure continues – landed safely now getting on a boat to look for Orca whales #lolita."
We also secured the photos from the PETA ad – see below!
Oh Adriana de Moura – little tip: don't tell a lie when it can easily be disputed on film or in writing! #Housewives101
After getting engaged last season on Real Housewives of Miami the media discovered that Adriana had actually been married to Frederic Marq since 2008. Her rep said they got a marriage license but because of an error in the info on the license it was nullified. THEN it emerged that a month after obtaining said erroneous license, Frederic and Adriana actually got married.
Fast forward to last week's season premiere of RHOM and Adriana is now claiming they got a license but called the wedding off before actually getting married. Well that's Adriana's new storyline and she's sticking to it! "This season is drama galore," Adriana hints.
“Maybe 8 weeks into the relationship, Frederic asked me to marry him. I was in that lustful stage and the sex was great, so I said yes, "Adrianainsists to NBC Latino. "But when I started to feel conflicted, we started fighting and he finally pulled the plug."
The Monday reality TV viewer numbers are in and they're not too shabby!
Basketball Wives is back with a bang! The season 5 premiere episode pulled in 2.39 million viewers. Now let's just hope that the audience wasn't turned off by the hour long 'woe is Evelyn' fest. I don't mean to be cold hearted, but it was a bit much and I hope they don't plan to dwell in it all season.
I just can't figure out what's going on with Real Housewives of Miami. It's like in a desperate bid to be as good as all the other shows, they scrambled to switch everything up – giving me no sense of security here.
On top of that, I think I'm Weddings by Bravo'd out. I mean on top of Tamra Barney and NeNe Leakes' big spinoffs we're now inundated with Adriana de Moura and Joanna Krupa planning weddings and bickering about weddings and out-weddings each other and weddings, weddings, weddings… Maybe we can just pull a Sister Wives, lump all the Bravo brides together, and throw them with one man. I nominate Andy Cohen to be tied to these broads for life. Payback's a bitch!
So last night Joanna and Romain Zago had the big talk. You know, the prenup one. In a pseudo intimate moment in which Joanna's minimalist makeup was applied to perfection, they had breakfast in bed and argued, over freshly cut fruit, that Romain was going into wedding planning by planning his divorce. Um… he's agreeing to marry JOANNA.