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Real Housewives of New York

Real Housewives of New York had a looooong hiatus while it got all its new ducks in a row. Sadly, either people forgot about them and didn’t bother going back or everyone is still sick of the lingering taint of acidic drama. Regardless of why less and less people tuned in, the ratings for the season five premiere were less than stellar. Like so less than stellar Kim Zolciak‘s wig reveal slammed RHONY!

According to The Huffington Post, the season premiere only drew 1.7 million viewers in it’s 9pm slot. Which is unprecedentedly low for a Housewives season premiere. Just for some perspective – Real Housewives of Orange County (previously the lowest rated in the franchise) got over 2 million viewers for it’s season premiere.

Allegedly Bravo isn’t too upset by the ratings. “Bravo didn’t expect the numbers to be huge,” a network insider revealed. “Monday is a new night for the show and it’s the most competitive night of the week.”

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Well, girls and boys… it finally happened. After months of build-up, Bravo unleashed the New New York and we finally caught a glimpse of Real Housewives of New York without Jill Zaaaaaaaaarin. For those of you who never thought you’d live to see the day – rejoice – but sadly it seems Pinot Singer has hopped right on up into the bitter, negative, biddy role that Jill so recently vacated. Dangit, Pinot!

Last night we were treated to some delightful new blood, and while Sonja Morgan was in good spirits and ready to move on and make new friends but keep the old, LuAnn de Lesseps, Countess no more and Pinot were still circling each other like round the UES rosie with the same old axe to grind. Sonja said the only thing worse than stale brioche at a party is stale guests… well meet your stale guests. Are people still eating brioche?

Things open with LuAnn and newbie Aviva Drescher pretending they’re long lost friends and doing lunch. Let’s just call it what it is – they’ve met each other a total of two times and Bravo is forcing them to interact as buddies to stack the odds. The only interesting thing that came out of this to-do was the revelation that Aviva’s ex-husband Harry has quite the active social life  – so active that he’s dated and most likely boinked LuAnn and Sonja.

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Real Housewives of New York is officially back! Well, ok – tonight it is. The ladies of the Big Apple are returning with three new Housewives who already have major drama with some of the original cast.

Speaking out about opening up her life for reality TV is Sonja Morgan, whose zany antics and truly kooky ways have earned her a lot of fans and a lot of side-eye.

Speaking to LifestyleMirror.com, Sonja reveals that way back in season one of the now iconic reality show she was approached to join the cast, but chose not too. In those days Sonja was married to John Adams Morgan and letting television cameras into her business wasn’t for her.

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I really think I’m going to enjoy the newest additions to Real Housewives of New York…especially Carole Radziwill.  The widow and journalist (not to mention princess and bestselling author) with close ties to the timeless Kennedy clan will be joining Countess LuAnn and Pinot Singer on the upcoming season.  She was recently interviewed by the New York Post where she described herself as the “unlikely housewife.”  I like her already.

Calling the show a “job offer”, Carole explains, “Critical acclaim is great, and it gets you the corner table, but commercial success pays the bills.”  With the women of New York rumored to be making $500,000 this season, I’d say that’s not too terrible of a payday.

While many ladies try to finagle their way into the franchise by befriending wives or crashing cocktail parties (an estimated 500 women tried out for Beverly Hills), Carole had no desire to pursue reality television.  Of her friend and Bravo King Andy Cohen, she says,“I could probably count on one hand the number of conversations I’ve ever had about the ‘Housewives’ show with him.”

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If you thought the Real Housewives of New York was going to get less dramatic following the firings of Jill Zarin, Alex McCord, and Kelly Bensimon, you’d be wrong. Rather than getting classier, the show is probably going to look a lot more like the menopausal, passive aggressive version of Bad Girls Club. The show premieres in two weeks and already, the ladies are taking shots at each other in the press for truly pointless things like their premiere parties.

Rob Shuter of the Huffington Post, who love him or hate him, does appear to have a direct line into the RHONY world, reports that the upcoming season will be Ramona Singer and Sonja Morgan versus the rest of the gang, which isn’t surprising. As far as Countess LuAnn, she remained more opportunistic, as she usually is, and stuck with the new blood, and the anonymous cast member tells Rob “The Countess, who has tried to stay neutral in the past, was forced to choose between the new ladies and her old cast mates … and picked the former.”

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Aviva Drescher is coming out swinging on the upcoming season of Real Housewives of New York. The cast newbie is not mincing words or trying to play nice She succinctly calls Pinot Singer “white trash” in one clip of the series. Aviva is much more than a housewife – the former lawyer is now a philanthropist and mother of four. And she also has a prosthetic leg.

Speaking to the NY Post, Aviva describes meeting her current husband Reed and combining their families Brady Bunch style. They met in a Bed, Bath, and Beyond after painful divorces. “The kids started playing with each other, and he said, ‘It’s tough being a single dad,’ ” Aviva recalls. “Let’s say we took the ‘beyond’ to another level.” Aviva and Reed now have added two more children to their brood.

Aviva reveals that she lost her leg in a farming accident when she was a child, which has taught her to be tough and straight forward. Aviva also shares that she has two different artificial legs – one for heels and one for flats! Ok, that’s kind of awesome.

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Oh, Real Housewives of New York… You are nothing with out Ramonja! Sonja Morgan admits the new season is filled with drama and she even goes to battle with her long-time bestie Ramona Singer!

Talking to Wetpaint, Sonja reveals the season is a cacophony of feuds and changing allegiance – and there are some girls she’d rather just not speak to! “It’s girls vs. girls and it literally changes every minute. By the time the season’s done, I’m even sick of myself. I don’t want to see anybody,” she shares.”What kind of season would it be if we were all speaking in the end?”

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Someone needs better agents. Ex Real Housewives of New York cast member Kelly Bensimon has just released a dieting book, I Can Make You Hot: The Supermodel Diet, when she isn’t even on the air anymore. Poor thing.

If you’d like to resemble the above photo, the book tells you to eliminate “sugar, oil, alcohol, salt, caffeine and nuts” and to chew gum. Kelly also advises to chew “8 times instead of 4.” In other words, the same old dieting advice you have heard about 5 million times before with a little extra psychosis just for fun. Other groundbreaking dieting advice is drink 8 to 10 glasses of water, get enough sleep and exercise daily.

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