All of the Real Housewives of Orange County got to meet Lizzie Rovsek on Monday night's episode, and I don't think anyone was surprised at how she was welcomed into the group by Vicki Gunvalson, were they? There's nothing more attractive than a super catty, middle-aged loudmouth acting like the mean head cheerleader in an 80's romcom, is there? Of course, Vicki was just marking her territory as far as Tamra Judge is concerned, and something tells me (duh, the previews!) that Lizzie won't be too sad to cut ties with her new neighbor.
Admitting she doesn't have much to say in her Bravo blog, Lizzie begins, "I started writing this blog several different ways until I realized that I don't really have much to say or know what to say regarding this episode. Honestly, I didn't even know what to think after I watched it. I really didn't think Vicki would insult almost everything about me as she did. There are so many things to say and nothing to say at the same time," adding, "I don't pick people apart for the way they look or put down things that people have worked for in their life. Vicki says that it takes 'no skill' to be in a beauty pageant…Well, I tell you one thing it gives young women and that is confidence. And thank goodness I have some so I could handle the barrage of insults that came my way tonight."
Sure, she wastes gems by having them put in her teeth, she comes off as the world's biggest nag, and I am not NOT worried about the state of her marriage, but by God, I love Shannon Beador, and last night's Real Housewives of Orange County only affirmed my affections. Not only did she stay true to herself (I like that even though she enjoys spending time with Vicki Gunvalson, she wasn't shy about calling out her mean girl behavior to new girl Lizzie Rovsek), but she managed to make Heather Dubrow look like the ultimate twit (although given how the season has been going thus far, I'm not sure that's quite a feat).
In her Bravo blog highlighting last night's episode, Shannon begins, "I consider Dr. Moon a part of the family so I was really excited when Vicki agreed to see him with me. I love Vicki's spirit — she is open to anything, especially holistic and alternative therapies. Dr. Moon has a theory that when a person is "jammed," energy cannot properly flow through the body for optimum health. He will go through a process to 'de-jam' a patient and one of those areas to 'de-jam' is the tailbone. I know Vicki was joking around, but I want to be clear he does not put his finger in your rear end."
Last night the ladies of Real Housewives of Orange County all swore they weren't menopausal. In an effort to prove this they all reverted to acting like 10th graders who had ditched their chaperone on the high school field trip! Woo Hoo! Let's be bitches.
Vicki Gunvalson and Shannon Beador have connected over their mutual crazy and empty love tanks. Shannon knows just how to temporarily fill hers and she's letting Vicki in on her little secret: Dr. Moon! They pay a visit to his office where Vicki gets acupuncture and demands to check her email because "work! work! work!" and relax-schmelax! She asks Dr. Moon when he's gonna fill up her love tank and he stuck his finger up her butt. I kid you not! Shannon said Dr. Moon "de-jammed it". I think I'd rather have an empty love tank…
Shannon and new bestie Vicki go get their nails done with Tamra Barney. "You need good nails," Vicki instructs. But apparently you don't need good plastic surgery or frizz free hair. Or good boyfriends. Tamra is still harping about this ugly sweater Christmas party and it was like so horrible having to wear a funky polyester themed sweater. My, my has she become snobby! Who does Tamra think she is – Heather Dubrow? Speaking of which, Tamra and Vicki complain about Heather's pretensions and arrogance. Shannon – so happy to have friends and so happy to feel loved and included (finally someone likes her besides vodka!) – decides she too has a problem with how condescending Heather is. I mean there was that one time Heather snickered about Shannon putting diamonds in her teeth.
On Monday, a whopping 3.761 million viewers watched the season 3 premiere of Love & Hip Hop Atlanta. Also, 1.386 million sat through Arianna's nagging on 16 and Pregnant, and RHOC took a turn for the worse with only 1.435 million tuning in to meet Lizzie.Southern Charmended its first season with a 952,600 average after 1.038 million watched the secrets revealed special.
Are any of the real housewives the first people you think about going to when you need financial advice? Probably not if we are talking about Teresa Giudice, Alexis Bellino or Lynne Curtain, whose financial pitfalls have taught us what not to do.
Guess what, guys? Everything is fine with Shannon Beador's marriage! Scratch that, it's more than fine! In fact, things are so great with the newest Real Housewives of Orange County member and her constantly berated hubby that she decided to dedicate her entire Bravo blog as an explanation for that awkward overnight date! I kid, I kid. I can't imagine having my relationships scrutinized and my behavior dissected by strangers. Not to mention, having Bravo cameras in one's bedroom is bound to make anyone chug some Goose!
She begins, "Tonight I get a break from the ladies and you see more of my home life — actually my life AWAY with my husband! Yeah! I was so thrilled that David planned an overnight trip to the St. Regis. He was so thoughtful to have made the arrangements and then surprise me with it! I am happy that you are able to see a more playful side to our relationship this week. David is very funny and makes me laugh a lot — I was literally hysterically laughing the entire time we were away! David likes to tease me, especially in front of other people. I thought it was hilarious when he joked in front of the bellman about 'my' snoring and 'getting into bed.' Whenever we travel (with the kids), he loves to put on the robes that the hotel provides. It was really sweet that he suggested it when we were alone! It's just the presentation and tone when he suggests it — cracks me up!"
Well, it's about damn time! I was starting to wonder if we'd ever meet the elusive Lizzie Rovsek, but finally she made an appearance on Monday's episode of Real Housewives of Orange County. I wasn't expecting much, but I loved the way she held her own with the other women. Lizzie even impressed the walking thesaurus and the fitness maven in one fell swoop! She commemorates her inaugural episode in her first ever Bravo blog.
Of her grand, yet clumsy, entrance (a girl after my own heart!) begins, "'Here I am!!!' I definitely wanted to make an impression on my first episode, but falling to the ground at my first party was not my intention. I can blame that on the new pair of platform heels I had on, nerves, or maybe it was that little step down out the patio door at Danielle's house…Ahhhhh, but in any case I hope it shows all of you how real I am. We all fall down now and then, no biggie, shake it off and move on. I was worried how I might appear on the show, but as a whole, you just met Lizzie–and it's pretty close to form. I'm a friendly, happy, outgoing person, self-deprecating at times and a little sarcastic. As you get to know me more as the season continues, I hope you see in me my honest heart and genuine spirit."