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On last night’s Survivor, Colton continued to play puppet master. The tribes divided, and one was a lot more stacked than the other…I’m just sayin’. Colton has his new tribe eating out of the palm of his uncalloused, manicured hand, and I want to reach through my screen and pluck one of his eyebrows more than the other so they’d look uneven. That’s true retaliation, let me tell you.

The Salani awake after not having to attend tribal council. They can’t believe that the men of Manono are such a mess. The women hope that the merge is impending, as they are now seven strong against the men’s crumbling brood. Jeff Probst invites the teams to the reward challenge and calls for a tribe switch. Colton looks like someone just yanked his favorite silver spoon right out of his mouth! The new teams will be chosen at random. Each player will receive an egg. Jeff will count down to when everyone can smash their egg against their chest. The color of the yolk will determine the new tribes. The blues are Salani while the orange is Manono. I will say, it seems the blue team got the best of both. It will be fun watching Colton and Alicia vie for attention on the new orange team.

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Well, the eighties happened and then they came back to haunt us. Last night’s episode of Real Housewives of Orange County might as well have been titled ‘What The Eff?’ I have no idea what was going on, either in the show or in Vicki’s head. There were so many meltdowns I couldn’t keep track! There was whining, crying, and screaming everywhere I turned. The only person not acting insane was the person about to undergo surgery to remove potentially cancerous tumors! Why is Briana a zillion times more mature than a pack of women twice her age?

Things begin at Tamra‘s ’80s themed Bunco party. The guys arrive all in period themed costumes; Slave stole Billy Ray Cyrus’ mullet, Eddie looks silly, and Terry bought his wig at Dollar General. It was fun. Vicki immediately freaked out upon seeing Slade and went off the deep-end. Tamra tried to include Brooks, but he couldn’t come. Alexis was pissed because Jim wasn’t invited–because no one likes him–although, Tamra claims he didn’t want to participate.

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On last night’s episode of Bethenny Ever After, Bethenny and Jason found themselves at an all-time low, as their fighting turned venomous and anguished. Interestingly, we also saw Jason put his foot down, refusing to let Bethenny sell out their marital woes on television. I love integrity in a man. Bethenny also learned that Julie may be thinking of moving on, and her apartment renovations got horribly off track due to miscommunication.

Bethenny is doing a shoot for People Magazine. She has invited some friends/employees to hangout/counsel her. Her poor hair dresser had a yoga top boob-malfunction, which was a super funny story and as a yoga zealot, I’ve often worried about the astray boob. Aaaahhh… namaste – not for the faint of heart!

Bethenny regales them with tales of Mr. Perfect Behaving Badly. Apparently, the Frankel-Hoppys don’t have much luck with 40th birthdays. Bethenny planned a special birthday weekend for Jason and all went divine until Jason expressed disappointment that his parents weren’t included. Which caused massive fighting. Bethenny feels she included them by setting aside a day on the weekend for him to visit with them. I feel for Bethenny – my feelings would be hurt, but I also understand Jason’s perspective.

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Last night’s Basketball Wives was all over the place – charity events, fake dinners, launch parties, and Central Park. Even better? The veterans can’t decide which newbie to hate on, so they just go back and forth between confronting Kenya and Kesha. Always in the middle? Suzie, of course!

Oh Jen, glad to see you again! Yeah, I’m just being polite. Suzie heads to Jen’s new NYC digs because she is bursting at the seams at to talk more shiz about Kenya. She shares the video shoot debacle when Kenya and her posse didn’t realize what all went into renting out the club. Give me a break, Suzie. She sounds like a twelve-year-old.

Kesha and Evelyn meet for dinner because Evelyn thinks Kesha is pretty cool. Kesha is hosting a charity event and she doesn’t want the same kind of behavior that Suzie brought to Royce’s event. Evelyn would love to support her event, but she doesn’t want drama if Jen is also invited. Kesha would like everyone to attend, but if she has to choose between Evelyn and Jennifer, Evelyn will get the invitation. However, Kesha is quick to remind Evelyn that she has no problem with Jen. She does relay her issues with Tami, and Evelyn believes those can easily be resolved if Kesha shoot straight with Tami.

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Last night’s episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta featured a lot of bad evening attire. Whew. That mess of bad fashion at the anniversary party was so distracting, was it not? We also got some family drama, and Kim playing her new role of lady of the rented mcmansion. Oh, and Phaedra embalmed a dummy!

Things begin with Kim storming around her garage, ordering Sweetie and her father around under the guise of organizing before Kroy comes home. Kim is quite the hoarder collector! Kim claims she’s helping with the shuffling of boxes across the garage, but she’s really just barking orders. Sweetie threatens to call Clark Howard, who is some guy on the local news that exposes employers who mistreat their employees. Yes, Sweetie needs to get on that call.

Sweetie takes a cigarette break and Kim freaks out, chasing her all over the house bellowing and threatening. #timemanagement. Kim explains that Sweetie has become more of a friend than employee, and doesn’t take her job seriously. Is it because Kim has become more of a joke than ever? Although I agree, Sweetie needs to do her job or quit. Kim’s father tells her she needs yoga, she misses the point and says she’s already lost weight. I think he meant she needs to calm down. BTW – is anyone else not surprised Big Poppa is allegedly broke after seeing all that loot?

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Last night’s Mob Wives featured a getaway that I was forever thankful not be a part of, as it was cray-cray from the beginning. Renee brought the drama, Carla tried to play peacemaker, and even Karen attempted to maintain some sort of normalcy. She failed. Miserably.

The episode begins with Big Ang, Ramona, and Carla at the track. Big Ang loves some gambling. Karen joins the ladies for lunch, with Carla apologizing for not attending Ramona’s Halloween party. While Karen is convinced that Drita’s party totally sucked, she respects Carla’s loyalty. She suggests a ladies’ weekend in the Poconos, and all the women are excited about the prospect of a trip. Unfortunately for Big Ang, she’s having thyroid surgery and won’t be able to make it. Carla pretty much ends the chipper chatter when she mentions the ladies are forgetting to include Drita.

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Oh, Jersey Shore, how I love you…let me count the ways. I love you when you’re camping, when you incite food fights, and when you bring home grenades. I love you when you wear furry Ewok boots and need to blur out your private area because you forgot to put on underwear. I love it all.

Mike failed to execute his master plan on the last episode, so he takes an opportunity to take Jionni aside. He tells Snooki’s boyfriend that Snooks has totally seen the Sitch’s P while Ryder was hooking up with the Helium. Mike hopes that Jionni can respect his admission, man-to-man. Jionni shakes Mike’s hand and then crawls back in bed with Snooki to relay the Situation’s most recent situation. Snooks looks worried in the night vision cam, but seem legitimately concerned when the producers switch to full-on regular lighting. Jionni asks Nicole if Mike is being honest, but he continues to spoon Snooki as she laughingly declares Mike a liar.

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Last night on Project Runway All Stars the three finalist were revealed after the designers had to create a ready-to-wear look for designer, Nanette Lepore.

The designers meet Nanette in her garment district store and we learn commercialization combined with rising rents are forcing many factories and designers out of the infamous district. Nanette is very involved in a charity to revitalize the area (as is Isaac Mizrahi). The designers are to sketch one ready-to-wear piece and then go over the analytics with Nanette and her “coster.” The coster basically tells them how much the garment would sell for vs. how much it would cost to produce and make a profit. The difference is how much they can spend on fabrics to construct the piece.

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