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On last night’s episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta, all the ladies conducted themselves with dignity and nobody got hurt. Kim finally convinced someone to marry her, and NeNe contemplated leaving Haterville behind for the wilds of Los Angeles – where no one is fake. Nope – not in the least! Oh, and Phaedra announced that her phuneral home was coming soon. Watch out Atlantians – you’re about to be buried with style.

Things begin with Cynthia and Kim meeting each other for lunch. If you said “say what?” you’re not the only one. But apparently, Cyn decided handling things like an adult was better than getting into a screaming match in a church parking lot, so she invited Kim to lunch to work out their differences.

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Last week on Shahs of Sunset, Golnesa ‘GG’ Gharachedadhi made nice with everyone and they all lived happily ever after.  Sort of.

This week’s episode opens with GG explaining that she’s been trying hard to keep it together and be zen-like since the crazy dramatics of the past few weeks.  She also talks about buying her parents a new car for their anniversary, which is coming up.  Persians love to give lavish gifts, she explains.

Reza Farahan comes over for some wine and to break the news to GG that he won’t be able to attend the party she’s throwing for her parents’ 40th anniversary party. He pretends to be heartbroken over it, but he’s secretly thrilled. “Thank the LOOOORD” Reza yells into the camera. GG isn’t too happy, but knows the date is important to Reza.  Reza explains that he feels like his window of opportunity to snag a good man is disappearing. He wants to get out there and find someone while he’s still got it goin’ on.

GG decides to show off her collection of knives. GG grew up with weapons for protection, so it’s very normal to her.  I don’t know anyone who names their weapons, but GG is unique. Reza thinks if we look up GG in the dictionary, we’ll find her on the page wielding a machete. “You don’t joke about GG and her knives”. This whole show should be peppered with Reza-isms. They’re my favorite part.

Meet Crispy.  GG’s taser gun.  150,000 volts of love.  Cripsy scares Reza on several levels – mostly because Golnesa admits she’s dying to try it out on someone.

Sammy Younai stops by Mohamed’s mansion (palace?!) to check up on things.  This mansion is crazy.  I know where I’m spending my Mega Millions dough.  Oh wait, that lady in Maryland that I’m not related to won it.  Sammy wants this job to be perfect so she can get in tight with the billionaires.  We feel you, Sammy.

GG meets her dad for lunch.  She admits to us that she’s been very blessed to have parents who’ve given her everything.  She knows she’s lived a pampered life.  When her dad asks how her day was, she gripes about the traffic on the way to the mall and chipping her freshly manicured fingers.  Her dad gives her grief – gently – about her out of control spending.   Daddy tells her that she needs to get a job and then pulls out the most recent credit card statement, which GG doesn’t want to see.  He tells her he many not continue to foot the bill – $6800 last month and $8500 this month alone.  The food arrives and they shift the conversation to finding GG a man to support her instead.   GG’s doesn’t like to hear about her sister Leila’s self-supporting ways, as she’s married and doesn’t have her credit card bills sent to her dad.  It’s a touchy subject with GG.

Mercedes “MJ” Javid talks about her upcoming birthday while she blings up her puppies and heads out for a walk with Reza. He asks MJ if she’d come to NYC with him soon for a long-overdue meetup with his estranged father and she agrees.

The conversation to turns to MJ’s weight.  Reza has apparently been trying to get her to lose weight for years now and he says he’d like to gift her with a colonic for her birthday.   I think i want GG buying my bday gifts.  New car or a colonic? Decisions, decisions.

GG’s sister plays hardball with the car dealer over the price of the Mercedes Benz they’ve picked out for their parents.  GG is frustrated that she doesn’t get any respect from her sister on the financial front – Leila thinks GG’s job is shopping.

Mohamed is home to see how his ‘house’ is progressing.  He isn’t happy despite the fact that Sammy is ahead of schedule.  He gives Sammy hell for a few minutes as they do a walk through.  Mohamed loves the pool and tile – for $2million he better adore it!  Sammy is going to celebrate Mohamed’s praise by getting wasted.

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Last night’s Mob Wives followed Renee Graziano’s emotional distress, and it becomes more and more evident that something shady was going on with husband Junior Pagan in regard to her father’s arrest.

Renee is still in a very bad place after both Junior and her father went away on the same day.  Karen Gravano understands that, perhaps they needed to be arrested, but she wishes the feds could have at least waited until after Thanksgiving.  Over the phone, her friend Nikole pleads with Renee to motivate herself for A.J.’s sake.  While, Renee promises she doesn’t let her son see her so upset, she is screaming and sobbing for most of the conversation.

Ramona comes to visit Big Ang at the bar.  Ramona shares with Big Ang how horribly Renee is doing.  Big Ang has left her multiple messages, but she had no idea things were so bad.  They discuss the need to get Renee out to take her mind off of the situation.  Ramona can’t believe that Junior would surrender to the feds, and not even tell Renee and A.J. that he was doing so.  She knows now that Thanksgiving will be forever tainted for Renee, much like it is for her, as her grandfather died on Thanksgiving.  Ramona states that her grandfather was the true definition of “a gangster” that is lacking in today’s society.  Big Ang agrees…no one is loyal anymore.  Are these women listening to themselves?  I know that Ramona loved her grandfather and he no doubt thought she hung the moon.  However, for her to be hung up and proud on the fact he was a criminal, is a little off to me.

Carla Facciolo and Drita D’avanzo meet for lunch, and Carla fills in Drita on Renee’s breakdown.  Drita can’t imagine what Renee is going through.  She thinks that maybe she should take the kids to visit Lee in jail before the holidays.  She hasn’t seen him in over a year.  Carla tells Drita that Junior left a note before turning himself in to the feds.  Drita can’t believe it – she thinks that if Junior was going to surrender, he should have let Renee take him in to say good-bye.

Drita heads to the Drunken Monkey to see Big Ang.  She tells Big Ang she is considering taking the kids to see Lee.  Drita admits it’s hard to try to shield her daughters from this lifestyle, only to have to take them somewhere as scary as a prison.  Big Ang agrees, but she thinks all men look pretty hot in prison uniforms.

Carla and Joe take their kids roller skating.  They really are such a cute family.  I hope Joe can stay on the straight and narrow because it is obvious his young son truly idolizes him.  Meanwhile, Renee goes to Ramona’s for a pre-Thanksgiving dinner.  She promises she will stand behind Junior while he’s in jail.  Renee has decided to put a positive spin on Junior’s incarceration, because she knows he can’t cheat on her in the slammer.  She is brought to tears talking about her father though.  Karen arrives and proposes a toast, and Renee starts screaming like a banshee.   Celebrate?  They expect her to celebrate?  She can’t do this – and she leaves.  I hope she’s getting some help.

At home, Drita shares a fun moment with her youngest daughter.  She hopes to be both a mother and father to her girls, in Lee’s absence.  When she tries to bring up the possibility of visiting Lee, Giselle doesn’t want to go.  She doesn’t know who he is, she hasn’t even comprehend who “Daddy” is.  Even with Drita’s chiding, Giselle is adamant about not meeting Lee.  Drita is heartbroken.

Big Ang, Ramona, and Karen take Renee to a drag queen show in an attempt to take her mind off what she’s going through.  Big Ang loves a drag show because they sort of remind her of, well, herself.  Renee is even laughing – the women can’t believe it!  Over cocktails, Drita tells Carla that there are rumors circulating that Junior snitched on Renee’s dad.  Carla is floored.  Drita and Carla’s husbands were both incarcerated, thanks to rats.  Well, thanks to doing criminal activity, but they were ratted out by others doing the same thing.  This news makes Carla sick to her stomach.

Karen and Carla meet for dinner, and the pair discusses an article that accuses Junior of flipping on Renee’s father.  Of course, Karen needs to clear the air…yes, her father “cooperated” with the feds, but he didn’t do the “scummy act” of wearing a wire.  There is no comparison between Karen’s father “cooperating” and Junior “ratting” on Renee’s dad.  After setting the record straight on that little issue, Karen hopes that Renee will be able to overcome this madness.

Big Ang has a friend over to her house, and they are chatting about the recent Junior gossip.  Big Ang makes it clear that there are rules in this lifestyle and Junior has broken them.  His selfish actions will affect how people see Renee and A.J., and that is a tragic thing to do to one’s family.  She reveals that when she was arrested, the police tried to get her to be an informant, but no way, according to Big Ang.

Karen and Ramona go to Renee’s house to make sure she’s okay.  Renee cannot, and will not believe the article.  She points out that the writer has had to recant three different stories.  Renee is worried the way things are going A.J. will be losing his mother next, as she’s stretched so thin emotionally.  Renee knows that A.J. is being punished for having a father who is accused of being a rat.  She apologizes to Karen for having to go through all of this again, as she was labeled similarly due to her father.  She breaks down apologizing for not being a good friend to Karen when she returned last year.  She is all over the place, crying, shaking, calm, quiet.  Karen wants Renee to face the facts that the gossip could be true, but she refuses.

Renee goes to church in hopes of finding some peace.  Big Ang goes to visit her sister Janice with a copy of The Post, which basically confirms the rumors that Junior snitched on Renee’s father.  Renee is a basketcase and it’s very difficult to watch.

Next week, Renee tries to come to grips with the news.  She now believes that Carla has been talking crap about her behind her back.  Carla accuses Renee of being extremely paranoid given her current state of affairs.

WHAT DID YOU THINK OF LAST NIGHT’S EPISODE?  WILL RENEE BE ABLE TO PULL HERSELF OUT OF HER DEPRESSION?  SHOULD DRITA TAKE HER DAUGHTERS TO VISIT LEE?

And then there were eight. We’re jumping in to covering American Idol, which is awesome for me because 1) I love it; and 2) but for recapping the elimination show, I’d likely be reminded of my Pauly D and Vinny Thursday night withdrawals. The show begins as it should…Randy Jackson is smooth, dawg, Steven Tyler is swathed in an excessive amount of man scarves, and JLo is sporting an outfit I would have killed for back when I was in middle school – and mind you, that was in the late 80′s.

The show opens with the always suave and debonairly coiffed Ryan Seacrest promoting Aerosmith’s upcoming tour. The remaining nine singers are shown the celebrity tweets, which tout their favorite idols of the season. Carrie Underwood, Lifehouse, and Mariah Carey all show some love for those who chose their songs. Poor DeAndre Brackensick didn’t receive any such tweets after his performance of Eric Benet’s “Sometimes I Cry” (sidebar…I’m so excited to be recapping the AI because all season I’ve wanted to hear from y’all how much he reminds you of former contestant Jason Castro). Instead, DeAndre gets a personal visit from Eric Benet. He’s moved to tears, Ryan is excited to have Eric grace the stage, and somewhere Halle Berry is flaunting her engagement ring at her television screen while Olivier Martinez chides his future bride about being married to such a d-bag. Did I digress too much?

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Knowing that last night’s episode of Survivor was Colton-free, did you feel better about tuning in to watch?

The now merged tribe celebrates with champagne and cheese back at the beach. Everyone seems to be happy that it’s every player for themselves. Alicia is appalled to think that Christina is still in the game. Let the backstabbing begin! The following morning, Jonas is impressing the women with his culinary skills. Model Jay denies Tarzan some coffee, with Jay informing him that the coffee is only for the people who won it in the last challenge.

What? Tarzan can’t believe his former dude teammate isn’t reverting back to the guys versus the girls alliances. He approaches Mike about getting the gang back together, as the men and women are equal in numbers. Tarzan promises a female defector in the form of Alicia to create a stronger voting pool. Sure, yeah, sounds good, says Mike, who trusts Tarzan about as far as he can throw him. Interesting…it seems the most recent winners don’t want to play the way of the middle school dance with boys on one side and girls on the other.

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Last night’s premiere of 16 & Pregnant’s fourth season gave viewers double the baby mama drama with two new episodes. The first episode introduces us to cheerleader Mackenzie Douthit and her bull riding beau Josh McKee from Oklahoma.

Mackenzie loves going to the rodeo with her friends to watch her boyfriend compete, only this time she’s got an extra person with her…in her belly. She’s a rising junior in high school, and Josh has graduated. Mackenzie doesn’t want to get too far behind with her cheerleading goals, so she still attends practices (to watch), and she plans to jump right back in to the tumbling and pom poms as soon as possible. Josh appears to be very supportive, and the couple seems to have fun together.

Mackenzie puts a lot of pressure on Josh to plan for their future, and her family doesn’t think that she realizes what a change this will be in her life. After her sisters plead with her not to name the poor child “Cowbell,” her mother inquires as to why she wasn’t more careful. Duh! As a cheerleader, she didn’t want to take the Pill and risk getting fat. Um…I don’t want to point out the obvious, but…

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Last night’s episode of Bethenny Ever After was all about team building, compromise, and mummy dearest. The Skinnygirl Team had girls night out, learned self-defense, and got to roller skate around Bethenny‘s new apartment. Bethenny and Jason practiced their lost at sea skills and compromised and communicated. Oh, and they had mouth guard sex, which I’m sure has also happened this one time at band camp. And Bethenny’s mom made an unwelcome appearance via the tabloids.

Bethenny is out to dinner with her girls, who also happen to be her employees. It’s apparently a work dinner, but they are talking about Bethenny, Bethenny’s relationship, and how she sucks at being a girls-girl because she was always alone. I guess Bethenny’s nonsense is paying everybody’s bills! Bethenny reveals that Jason is in denial about his love of therapy and the boat trip was successful in the end because they are communicating more.

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It’s like, if they aren’t causing drama, they would shrivel up and disappear (and would that really be so bad?)…that’s right, I am referring to the ladies of Basketball Wives.

Last night’s episode started where last week’s left off, as Shaunie has tried to separate a steaming Evelyn and a holier than thou Jenn. Evelyn has grand plans to go wait around the corner, pretending that she left, and jump Jenn when she leaves the restaurant. Someone is taking a page right out of the Love & Hip Hop playbook, isn’t she? Oh, Kenya. Kenya, Kenya, Kenya. She intervenes in hopes a story about her best friend from fifth grade will calm Evelyn, much to Tami’s chagrin. Tami is sure that Evelyn doesn’t want to hear Kenya’s nonsense. While Kenya agrees, she keeps talking anyway. Tami found the whole party very entertaining, even if it wasn’t what Shaunie had hoped.

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