Recaps

love hip hop yandy

I’m basically just watching the Love & Hip Hop finale to see which scorned lady Rich Dollaz is going to fight with next…should he get his own show for this purpose? Last night’s episode begins as Jhonni is pouring her heart out in the studio. At least Rich is good for some new material! Without Rich as a manager or a lover, she’s determined to let her music tell her story. Diamond Strawberry is also frustrated with Rich on top of all her Cisco drama, and she’s meeting with her father Darryl Strawberry to fill him in on her time in New York. She forgot to mention to him that she moved to the Big Apple in pursuit of a man and not her modeling career. Diamond regales her former baseball playing dad about the broken promises on which Cisco lured her to New York. He thinks it is high time for Diamond to start taking responsibility for her actions and her bad decisions. Darryl hopes this will be a life lesson for his daughter. His suit-shirt combo makes me dizzy.

Tara Wallace is excited that her etiquette business for wayward hip hop artists is taking off, and she’s calling in a favor from ex Peter Gunz. She’s hoping he’ll work with some of her artists. The pair catch up civilly (for once), and Peter thinks that this could be a step in the right direction for the pair. She warns him to be kind to Amina Buddafly. While it isn’t easy for her to listen to him wax poetic about his imploding marriage, she wants him to make better choices and stop hurting the people he claims to love…even if it is the woman she feels stole him from his family. 

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drama gets intense in the philippines

Last night the Real Housewives Of Atlanta went happy-happy in the Philippines as they did the “work” assigned to them by Dr. Jeff with Dr. Claudia Jordan acting in his absence (or who knows maybe he was on Skype). 

The ladies show up at the airport in good spirits. Porsha Williams had more Louis Vuitton luggage than she has brain cells and negotiating the luggage carousel in heels was like the second coming of Sheneneh. Porsha must look cute because she may meet her future married African sugar daddy husband at the airport! All the single men would rather endure an endless TSA security checkpoint, than deal with PoorTaste – or her baggage! 

Upon arriving at the airport Phaedra Parks hid in her limo cause ‘a Krayonce was ‘a comin! She’s been on RHOA trips before…  Despite Claudia’s protestations that the Philippines will be positive vibes, Phaedra declares these women would argue even at the second coming of Christ. Of course they would – because Lord knows all of ‘em ain’t getting into heaven!

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We begin this week’s episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians with Scott Disick accidentally walking in on Kris Jenner in her closet while she is getting dressed.  She spazzes and screams at him to get out of her space! Scott immediately runs downstairs to tell Kourtney Kardashian and Kim Kardashian that he did not intentionally try to creep on their mom and Kris whirls into the kitchen freaking out about wanting to have some private space as she flashes everyone her S&M bra under her robe. First of all ew, but also somewhat impressed as she looks good for a woman her age trying to pretend she’s 30.

Later on, Kourtney is in the kitchen with Khloe Kardashian and Khloe mentions that she thinks Scott is up to a shady business deal as all these multiple exotic cars are popping up in the driveway and there are about 10 different license plates strewn upon the counter. Like what is he up to? He could very well have a legitimate biz going on and while I don’t blame him for attempting to expand his skills of profiting outside the realms of reality TV, I highly doubt he’s doing anything resembling a la Guidice to make a buck. We’ll see what he’s up to later on.

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We open this week’s episode of Real Housewives of Melbourne with Janet Roach meeting Gina Liano for lunch to discuss the whole deal that went down between Janet, Chyka Keebaugh and Gamble Breaux. Both come wearing fighting colors – orange for Gina and black for Janet. Gina coordinates her outfits down to the eyeshadow. It must take her like 2 hours to get ready before she leaves the house.

Gina wants some clarity on who said what and Janet is in for it. You can just tell Janet gets caught up in the moment with spreading rumors and gossip as Gina is hammering her about what was exactly said, Janet essentially starts stuttering. Janet’s talking in circles and it’s not looking good for her. Gina scolds her and is just like “Shut your trap sometimes because it gets you into trouble!”. I think Janet needed to hear this – but she hated hearing it and walked out of the lunch. This is unfortunate that she took it so poorly from Gina. Janet probably felt pretty bad about the whole ordeal and is now regretting what she said which caused her to get up and leave. I don’t like that Gina inserted herself into the middle of this, but Janet did need a good talking to. Let’s hope this is laid to rest!

 LWNY_Bridesmaids_150112-PE-105

Well, it’s time for the new franchise of Lifetime’s Little Women series to make its debut! Little Women: New York premiered last night just after part one of the Little Women: L.A. reunion ended. And crossover “stars” from both cities appeared everywhere. Lila Call, a LWNY cast member, joined the LWLA ladies at their reunion to rehash her extreme antics with the ladies in LA last season. Then Elena Gant showed up on the LWNY premiere to sh*t stir like her name was Christy McGinty. Jeez, Elena! I thought she “had a dream!” that little people everywhere would one day live in peace? This dream is not happening in New York – or LA – with these groups of women.

We begin in NY with an introduction to the 6 little women and 1 little man who make up the cast. Lila Call (the ringleader), Misty Irwin (the party girl), Dawn Lang (paralegal career girl), Jason Perez (poly-sci student and – er – a guy!), Jazmin Lang (sister in law to Dawn & performer), Jordanna James (Broadway & burlesque performer), and Kristin Zettlemoyer (performer). Gotta say, I’m loving the opening video montage and soundtrack! Waaaaaaay better than LWLA!

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Who knew there would be a multi-part Little Women: LA reunion? Not this girl! Well, it’s happening. And part one was full of blaming and finger pointing and drama-rehashing…and that was just from the Terra Jole.

Hosting the first hour of the LWLA reunion is Tanika Ray. Since seating arrangements at reunion shows typically speak volumes, it’s noteworthy to point out that Tonya Banks and Terra Jole are seated by themselves on one side of the room while Christy McGinty, Briana Manson, Elena Gant, and Traci Harrison are arranged on the other couch. Terra is very pregnant (and filming new show Terra’s Little Family) and scenes flashback to her pregnancy journey. Terra explains that she’s hopeful her baby is healthy – and we do now know baby Penelope is just fine! Yay! Terra says she’s been feeling some extreme pain and she had a blackout recently, but the baby is growing normally and they’re okay. Christy says she’s excited for Terra, but Terra flat out says that she doesn’t think Christy is genuine in her well-wishing. Tonya is still mad that Terra told Elena about her pregnancy before her, but rest of the group calls out Christy for being an instigator (Ding! Ding! Ding!) for telling Traci (and everyone else) that Terra told Elena first. Terra accuses Christy of being fake, which she refuses to accept.

RHOBH season 5 finale

Last night the Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills played a game called Intervention Telephone, but when it finally got back around to Brandi Glanville, she couldn’t remember what she even said, so she just played dumb and ran. 

The Twisted Sicksters Richards are still stranded in Palm Desert after the histrionic horrors of YOU STOLE MY HOUSE! Kim Richards insists she’s grown-up and is waiting for Kyle Richards to treat her like the “healthy, sober older sister who can take care of her life.” Except stupid Kyle is all Kim can’t even tell a vibrator from a lipstick and a Tuesday from a toadstool and God! Do I have to do everything, even cook eggs?! Man, if I were Kyle I would have put Ex-lax in the bitch’s eggs! 

Yeah, they ate eggs instead of dealing with the destruction of the night before when Kim hoarsely screeched at Kyle to give back her house right. now. Or ELSE healthy big sober super sister Kim was going to destroy her with her inventive memory and her super weapon: the gossiping drunken lips of Boozdi, a super-villain who will swoop down from the valley with lies of attrition. Kyle meekly says she’s surprised Kim stayed after what happened, Kim just eats and plots to set a bag of Kingsley’s dog poop on fire and throw it on the grill. 

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Dance Moms Maddie Nia Kalani

So remember years and year ago when Abby Lee Miller was just a teacher and Dance Moms was actually enjoyable to watch? Am I recalling it correctly, or have I clouded my memory with more positive thoughts in an effort to combat the negativity I have to watch now. It’s a total mind game. You know who else likes mind games? Sia. On last night’s episode, the world is finally introduced to this video. Many found it to be artistic, some found it to be highly inappropriate, but I was just happy to see Shia LeBeouf dancing around in a cage. People think he’s weird and controversial, but he’ll always be Louis Stevens to me. And now Louis Stevens is dancing around in a cage with Maddie the dirty wolf. What’s so wrong with that?

Maddie is excited about the video’s release, but she has a hard time explaining the concept to a confused Jill. Jill decides to just call it “artistic” and “open to interpretation” and be done with it. The other moms freak out when they learn that Kathy and her Candy Apples have assembled a brand new team of Abby’s “rejects” (Kira’s word, not mind), and they will be competing against the ALDC this week. Abby is livid, but she needs to focus on the pyramid. Kendall and Nia are on the bottom for not placing in their solos. JoJo, MacKenzie, and Kalani make up the second row for doing a wonderful job in their losing group number. Maddie maintains her place in the top spot. There will be no solos this week, as Abby wants to celebrate Maddie’s wonderful duet with Shia. She pairs Maddie with Kalani for one duet, and she pairs Kendall with JoJo for a Freaky Friday number. MacKenzie and Nia are partnered for a scary duet, which leads up to a murder in the group routine. 

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