After watching the Shahs of Sunset since the beginning, tonight’s episode has been a long time coming. The lightning fast dissolution of the marriage between Mike Shouhedand Jessica Parido didn’t exactly surprise anyone, but the fact that Jessica stuck around without revealing what happened did. That all stopped tonight when Jessica made it clear what Mike can do with his golden dool.
It’s a Sister Wives miracle! Last night’s episode was only an hour long! Yeah, yeah, there was an hour long special afterwards, but the producers weren’t trying to drag out thirty minutes worth of the Browns’ story lines into two hours of show. Ariella May is now four-weeks-old, and the family has enjoyed passing her around. Christine is addicted to holding the baby, and Robyn believes her broken collarbone is healing nicely. The wives coo over how precious the baby is and Kody delights in doing impressions of his newborn daughter. However, he questions Robyn if she feels comfortable taking a new baby to Hawaii. If Robyn stays home with Aria, Kody reminds his wife that Solomon will have to stay behind as well.
It’s back to the therapist’s office for Meri and Janelle, and Nancy wants to know if the pair was successful with their dual decorating project at Thanksgiving. Janelle hedges around the fact that Meri spear-headed the project with little input from her, and she tries to get her point across delicately and without blame. Of course, Meri is glaring down Janelle like she’s responsible for the catfishing. Meri interjects to add she’d hoped that Janelle would have participated more and had more of a voice. The women nervously laugh at their inability to communicate. Janelle suggests that the two try again on their upcoming trip to Hawaii. Meri isn’t feeling it. Christine and Robyn are hopeful that their sister wives will build a friendship.
Yeah, I’m just gonna admit it – I didn’t want to write this Real Housewives Of New York recap. I had to rally and force myself, because last night was just so icky, fake, mean, desperate, and scheming. I wish for Carole Radziwill and Bethenny Frankel to take a good, hard, long inventory of their lives before they judge one more person. That display last night was, again, all kinds of hypocrisy and person-shaming, and lady bashing. I don’t care how much they boast about how it was one of the greatest episodes of all time – it wasn’t, in my opinion. So it’s round two of Get Crass With The Countess.
I don’t think Luann is any sort of innocent – she is annoyingly self-righteous, her jumpsuit was sinfully ugly, and I was pissed that she turned supplicant by apologizing to Bethenny after Bethenny’s barrage of insults. Also, I do think Luann likes to shift around the truth of things – like her relationship with Tom – but I don’t think anyone deserves the sort of treatment Bethenny dished out and I think Luann more than held her own in a calm manner, which impressed me.
We last saw the Little Women: NY in the midst of some serious baby shower drama. If you weren’t keeping up, an uninvited Lila Call decided her drama desire to be there was more important than an actual invite to frenemy Katie Snyder’s special day. Jessica Capri, who planned the whole thing, was left to try and kick Lila out on her own while Katie was unexpectedly called in by the doctor and thus, missed her own baby shower.
We resume with Jess storming out of her own house and the party she planned, with the shower guests looking on, totally bewildered. Jason Perez does his best to explain to Lila that this is just like the time when he brought Terra Jole to their apartment and Lila threw a hissy fit because she wasn’t invited. Nice try, Jason, but that wilted purple feather covering half of Lila’s head is not going to allow any logic to sink into her brain right now. Dawn Lang tries to jump in but Jason shuts her down immediately as the guests look on. Someone pop some damn popcorn already!
Dinner is botched! A boat nearby sinks into the Mediterranean Sea! The skies darken, and the Greek Gods rain lightning down upon the Ionian Princess! Is it Danny Zureikat’s fault? Eh, probably. Actually, we get a break from nonstop Danny drama this week to explore the ineptitude of the rest of the cast. Namely Hannah Ferrier, whose communication skills with Ben Robinson (and with everyone else aboard) need some serious work. Welcome to this week’s Below Deck Mediterranean: People Who Suck At Their Jobs Edition!
We pick back up at the bar where Bryan Kattenburg is ripping Danny a new one. He wants Danny to remember he’s a bottom guy. Does that make Bryan a top? Bobby Giancola is trying his best to wear Julia D’Albert-Pusey down, despite her boyfriend back home. Outside, Ben apologizes for not having Hannah Ferrier’s back when it comes to Danny and his many antics. Instead of accepting his apology, Hannah accuses Ben of being “abusive,” which is laughable. Ben’s like, ah, whatever. Friends, then? Great! Buh-bye! He sped the apology session up to escape the emotionally unstable Hannah. Smart move.
Jenelle, David, the boys, and Maryssa are in the car headed to go fishing. Kaiser is screaming as usual and Jace joins in. David yells at Jace that he’s six years old and shouldn’t be screaming like a girl. I bet he also tells Jace not to do things that seem “gay.” By the time they get to the lake, Jenelle and David are both irritated with Kaiser’s squealing. Jenelle points her finger at him and yells at him to stop screaming, which obviously doesn’t work. David says he takes after his daddy, Nathan Griffith, who’s a “little screaming bitch.” Sounds like a more apt description of Jenelle. Jenelle swears they’re never taking Kaiser with them on the boat again because they can never do anything with him around. Did she expect that a toddler was going to be able to sit on a boat for a few hours and care at all about fishing?
Only on Real Housewives could a lake house turn out to be a palatial mansion, and a trip to the Four Seasons be all your worst high school nightmares. On last night’s Real Housewives of Dallas, the ladies traveled to Austin for a birthday weekend only to end up the subject of their own horror story – narrated by LeeAnne Locken, of course! Is LeeAnne the new Danielle Staub, or what?!
Stephanie has apprehensions that Brandi Redmond blindly followed her Lord Jesus Juice when she invited LeeAnne and Tiffany Hendra to their lake house. Stephanie and Brandi’s husbands built the house together, so their families co-own it. I think Brandi and Stephanie are cute. I love their genuine friendship and that their families are so close. Also, Stephanie grows on me weekly – she’s far from ditzy, but instead is insightful and holds her words until she’s thought through what she wants to say.
Southern? Without a doubt. Charming? Eh, sometimes more than others with these guys! On last night’sSouthern Charm, the drama continued to focus on Thomas Ravenel and Kathryn Dennis with a little bit of Maury Povich mixed in for good measure. After we witnessed the birth of the couple’s son St. Julien Rembert Ravenellast week, T-Rav’s friends, including JD Madison and Whitney Sudler-Smith, encouraged the playboy to make sure he was, in fact, the father, and Craig Conover, Kathryn’s biggest cheerleader, jumped on the bandwagon. Of course, we had to wait until the witching hour to see it, but wowsers…and next week? Don’t get me started!
The episode begins with Cameran Eubanks calling Shepard “Shep” Rose about their partnerShep listing, but he’s busy taste-testing gin drinks at his bar, the Palace Hotel. Also getting an early start on the day is Craig who drops in on his former boss, Extreme Akim Anastapoulo. Akim finds it laughable to learn that Craig is in the hotel business. Not only did he spend three years in law school, but Craig graduated three years ago and still hasn’t taken the bar. The lawyer/Eye for an Eye star wants to hit Craig over the head with his Bat of Justice. He wonders how Craig will explain such a gap in his legal resume to future employers. Craig swears he doesn’t want to waste his education, and Akim begrudgingly agrees to help him get on the right path after he passes the bar. Something tells me this will Akim’s final cameo. Next time Craig seeks advice, Akim will send Kato Kaelin…or Big Sugar Ray.