Y’all, I’m torn. On one hand, I enjoy watching a show on Bravo that doesn’t revolve around incessant bickering and pettiness, but on the other hand…that chef, the language, Kim Zolciak Biermann’s new face that she’s denying! What’s up with all of that? Don’t Be Tardy is certainly mindless entertainment, but I feel like it’s also killing my brain cells…but what reality show isn’t these days?
Last night’s installment begins with Kroy and the obnoxious chef playing pool as Gloria the assistant brings downstairs the overly excited tiny pups with their red rockets glaring in Kim’s face. As Kim complains about the puppies x-rated doggie parts, one creature pees on Brielle’s bum and everyone gets into an overly ridiculous conversation about how many sacs hold the testicles in both canines and men. Kim has felt the balls and sacs with her pooches and her husband. That’s a tad too much information for this blogger!
Last night on Manzo’d With Children Mother’s Day was celebrated with a throwback photoshoot, Albie and Chris still pretended they don’t have jobs, and Lauren decided to never leave home again. Actually they barely leave the kitchen… what is happening in the rest of that house!?
Caroline Manzo is stressed. First Chrissofart left mommy and is now debauched in Hoboken. Now Lauren, about to be married to Vito the living incandescence of an Al-flavored mozzarella ball, wants to MOVE. OUT. Caroline cannot have this.
Caroline tries to convince Lauren that she and Vito should just stay at home to save their money, because Caroline is not giving them a downpayment on a house – only utilities in her house! This is what passes for responsibility in Manzo-land? Shouldn’t Lauren already have savings given that she’s been living with her mother her entire life? Caroline would prefer they make the ‘smart choice’ to live with her until they can afford to buy a nice (re: luxury) instead of living someplace dumpy (see: Crissofart’s apartment).
But Vito doesn’t want to live with Ma and Pa Smothers, he wants the freedom to show his love to Lauren and admits to his fiancé that he wouldn’t feel comfortable “in the bedroom” living at her mother’s. Does Lauren care what Vito thinks or wants? #RhetoricalQuestion.
Boss Jackie Christie has alienated almost every co-star on Basketball Wives LA, but Draya Michele isn’t far behind when it comes to upsetting friends. After Jackie and Brandi Maxiell’s explosive French fry altercation, the women were back last night to instigate more drama. Bring on dodge ball! The episode begins with Brandi meeting up with Mehgan Jones after their brawl in Santa Barbara. The two ladies have forgotten their smack down, and are instead blaming Jackie for all of their issues. As to whether Jackie is still hosting a cancer event to celebrate Brandi…that’s still up in the air! Brandi and Mehgan seem to have forgotten their punching match a few weeks earlier in lieu of bonding over how much they dislike Jackie.
Meanwhile, Jackie is recapping the insanity differently by sharing with Shaunie O’Neal that her latest experience with Mehgan who renders the suggestion that everyone bring tennis shoes? For fighting? Nostrils tempers that the tennis shoes were probably an invitation to exercise. Mehgan is meeting with Malaysia Pargo and Angel Brinks, and she reveals that she wants to unleash her anger on Jackie by hosting a dodge ball tournament. That’s much kinder than I expected.
Well, last night’s Little Women: LApicked up right where we left off. In the tornado of Tonya Banks and Jasmine Sorge. Last week, Jasmine stormed out of a party after surviving multiple confrontations with Tonya, all stemming from some trite slight (or perceived slight) that Tonya’s hanging on to from a year ago. As Jasmine tries to flee the scene, Tonya “touches” her head after Jasmine put her hand in Tonya’s face. As far as Jasmine is concerned, Tonya is trash. As far as Tonya is concerned, Jasmine is a sh*t stirrer. They vow to never be friends. (Pinky swear.)
The next day Briana Manson and Tonya meet for lunch to debrief. Since Jasmine is the only friend she has left who accepts her relationship with Matt, she wants to keep the peace. In order to do that, Tonya claims Jasmine needs to apologize or she’s “gonna snatch that wig off her head.” Because Tonya is all class, all the time. At her home, Jasmine cries to her husband about Tonya’s ratchet behavior. She expects more of little people, and just wants to get along with the group. She’s not ready to be around Tonya, but will have to face the music at Christy McGinty and Todd’s upcoming anniversary party.
Well, we’ve come to the end of our OCD journey. For now. To wrap up the short 8-episode season of Flipping Out, Jeff Lewis‘s design business takes a back seat to Jeff Lewis’s personal life – and household strife. Tensions rise to their boiling point with Zoila Chavez and her long time nemesis, Gage Edward. And it’s Jeff’s job to mediate between the two for life.
Before we get into the thick of the drama, we begin – where else? – in the car, of course! Where Jeff basically lives. The important task of thinking about dinner is underway, because it’s not just any dinner! It’s a dinner meeting between Jeff, Gage and their potential surrogate, who they haven’t met yet. Jeff says they haven’t chosen an egg donor yet. But he does want to choose his dinner from an online menu before arriving at the restaurant, thus maximizing his time talking about serious matters when they dine. Jenni Pulos asks Jeff if he realizes that having a baby means you don’t have control over every bit of minutiae in your world? Jeff’s response: to read off more menu items in detail. Jeff admits he’s nervous about the meeting, worried that the surrogate won’t like him. He confesses, “I need her more than she needs me.”
I’ve always observed a love/hate relationship with Bethenny – I’ve adored her, I’ve found her annoying, and in the last couple years I’ve really soured on her in the wake of her divorce and her constant discussing of Jason in the press. Although there is still a smarmy me-me-me element to Bethenny that always bubbles beneath, she’s really grown on me this season and I do feel that her divorce coupled with the loss of her talk show has humbled her. She handled the reunion with a dignity we’ve never seen form Bethenny, and a side of her I hope to see more of.
Bethenny didn’t allow herself to be talked down to, she ignored petty slights like Heather Thomson trying to goad her into a fight with Luann de Lesseps by revealing a toast to ‘take Bethenny down’ at the start of the season, and she didn’t go overboard trying to defend herself.
I don’t know about you, but last night’s parade of bump-its, spray tans, and grown-a$$ women dressed in prom dresses was exactly what I’d expect from the Dance Moms Reunion. As the mothers get dolled up pageant style, we learn that Abby Lee Miller has been texting them constantly, forbidding them from attending the reunion. Of course, when she finds out they are already there, she arrives and silently takes her seat, putting a slew of papers under the cushion.
As the show begins, Abby refuses to speak to anyone because she’s classy like that. I’m thrilled that Jeff Collins dialed back the orange tint in his hair from the last go-round. As the mom take the stage, Jeff rehashes the Nationals upset. Abby holds up a sign that reads, “Fixed!” Jill explains that the competition was orchestrated, and Holly interrupts to say that yes, the awards ceremony was a mess, but they’ve never complained when the ALDC won. No one cries “fixed” then! Jessalyn touts that it made their team seem like sore losers, and suddenly Abby has found her voice with Jill and Melissa co-signing her every word.
Last night’s episode of Real Housewives Of Orange County was psychic friends vs. psychotic love! The real question is – is a psychic really qualified to diagnose the validity of your cancer? Also, Shannon Beador pees herself when she runs – time for Lisa Rinna to get the ladies of RHOC a Depends connect.
Let’s just say this was an episode full of mixed messages – starting with Shannon’s parenting. Shannon’s pre-teen twins were caught toilet papering the neighbor’s house and Shannon is using this as an example of how she and David are a unified front. Shannon has NO tolerance for childhood pranks – she whips out her crystallizing zen goggles and attempts to stare her daughters down with the evil eyedometer set on ‘gentle,’ but her kids merely laugh. Shannon’s daughter Adeline calls Shannon out for being no fun unless she’s drunk and Shanon’s face freezes in a shocked expression.