Bianca and Jamie O’Hara are friends again, so Jedward decide to do a sex education class for them, using an ornamental brass banana and a condom. It’s like having a five year old tell you the facts of life. Jamie tells them he ‘don’t use them’ – words fail me. Calum Best and Nicole McLean are not amused. Same can be said for Jamie and Bianca. Jedward only seem to come to the forefront when they’re irritating. Like a child trying to get attention. They follow this by asking Kim if she’s ever ‘had fun’ on a kitchen table. Again, like a child when they learn something rude that they perceive to be funny. Someone vote them out and put us out of our misery.
On Day 23 in the Celebrity Big Brother house, we’re warned that this day will have the family task, where the housemates’ loyalty to the house is tested with temptation in the form of contact from their families. I have to admit this is my least favorite task every year; it’s very predictable and there’s just no time for it.
We start the day with Jessica Cunningham telling Nicola McLean that she has not one, but three boyfriends on the outside (take that Bianca Gascoigne), most of which know about the others (most?!?). Elsewhere, Jedward is doing swim aerobics in the pool; just another day then.
It’s day 22 in the Celebrity Big Brother house! Here we are again, and be warned, I’ve had no sleep so my sense of humor is in the same place as Kim Woodburn’s sense of goodwill: virtually non-existent. Back to the house and we go back in time to eviction Day.
Jedward played pizza boxes last night, and left a huge mess in the store room. Stacy Francis and Coleen Nolan confront the boys who straight away start to tidy up and sort. Despite it being sorted, Nicola McLean comes into the room and starts having a go at Jedward again, completely needlessly. Think she’s lost the plot. She’ll probably find it with my lost sleeping hours….
It’s day 21 in the Celebrity Big Brother house! Spencer Pratt has been up to his tricks during the night. Coleen Nolan was asleep in bed, and Spencer pulls the cover off her and talks and makes noises in her face. She’s telling James Cosmo outside and she’s frustrated that not one person told him to stop, and says they’re all scared of him.
Stacy and Jessica Cunningham are talking. One of Jessica’s reasons for nominating Stacy was that she hoards food, but Stacy is trying to explain why she does so, based on experiences that happened before Jessica came in. She says she always gives it out too, but Jedward just eats everything so it was too keep food away from them. She starts getting into an argument with Jessica, walks away and straight into another bicker with Kim Woodburn. Hopefully she’s getting them all out the way for a peaceful rest-of-day.
After the fallout of the previous evening, Nicola chose not to sleep in her normal bed next to Speidi. Stacy speaks to Jessica and Nicola and tells them not to bring the whole Speidi thing up when they’re drinking. Also, she points out to Jessica that she is the last person that should have the conversation as she barely knows her. How long were the first batch of housemates in then???
Oh Lisa Vanderpump – you saucy minx! I see your redemption campaign, smiling blithely, supremely feigning ignorance to any possible schemes, handing Dorit Kemsley a mirror and instructing her how to amputate her nose to spite her face, defending the maligned, innocent Kim Richards… I think Ms. LVP missed her calling in politics!
Last night had a tricky little moment between LVP and Dorit, didn’t it? Dorito had descended from her Nacho Cheese Delusions and spent the entire episode getting into my good graces, and also the good graces of Lipsa and Eileen Davidson, but in the last few moments, as if a switch was flipped, she all of a sudden turned a bit vituperative. Seeming to plant, to a scandalized, yet dismissive LVP that Lipsa is carrying around baggies of drugs. Now, before LVP could start alerting the police, Dorit was quick to add, as an afterthought that, the pills were “mostly” vitamins.
After last week’s lighthearted fun-fest, it’s only natural that the reality TV gods demand some meaningless drama from our Ladies Of London. And this week, that drama finds its way to the Henley Royal Regatta, where Adela King just can’t take another moment of playing nice with Juliet Angus. Also, Julie Montagu continues to hold a grudge against Sophie Stanbury for quitting the role of Caroline Stanbury Hater #2. But Sophie isn’t about to jump into Julie’s stew of resentment anymore. I guess Julie will just have to bathe in her own royal-ish mess. (Perhaps she’ll dry off with a Mapperton tea towel?)
There’s also a steady theme of mothers and daughters woven throughout last night’s episode that, I’m not ashamed to say, really touched me. It was subtle and unexpected and, after it all came together in the final scene, seemed to elevate this show to a new level in my view. Bravo to Bravo for airing a show that while petty at times, never lets petty actually take the wheel. But it’s still a bumpy ride, folks…so, let’s get to it!
We join the Celebrity Big Brother house to the news that Jamie had a rude dream about Nicola. I’m not sure why this is newsworthy, but he seems proud of himself and tells everyone so we shall too.
Chloe’s gone. James C Stays. Speidi is not speaking to Nicola. It’s been an eventful evening.
So Speidi is now just Spencer being very vocal and Heidi disagreeing but not speaking up. The pair are whispering in bed, but weirdly Spencer still has his earplugs in…..maybe that’s why he thinks he’s always right, because he can’t hear people tell him he’s not. Good thinking.