Recaps

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Happy Thanksgiving, y'all!  I hope you are enjoying the day with family, friends, and a delicious feast!  Me? I'm thankful that last night was the season finale of Preachers of L.A. Just kidding! I've grown rather fond of the men and their first ladies, especially Jay Heazlip, Wayne Chaney, and Ron Gibson's one-liners. Did Noel Jones reconcile with Loretta? How was Deitrick Haddon's second (technically third) wedding? Was Clarence McClendon there? Read on!

The episode begins with Noel dining with Loretta at her restaurant, and she is all dolled up for the occasion. They reminisce about how they met sixteen years ago and how their relationship has grown along the way. Loretta shares the story of the sex toys on fire at Dominique's bridal shower. Noel isn't surprised that the "dil-daws" went up in flames. God isn't a fan of kinky.

Deitrick and his family are singing in anticipation of his upcoming nuptials. His father interrupts the choir practice to discuss how proud he is of his son and the ob-stickles he's faced. Deitrick's dad is a man of few words, but he likes Dominique and blesses their relationship. Deitrick apologizes to his father for asking Noel to officiate the ceremony. His dad did his first wedding, and he doesn't want a repeat of that situation. His father totally understands.

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Last night's Shahs of Sunset reminded me how incredibly thankful I am for my friends and genuine friendships based on trust, love, and generosity. 

The relationships between Reza Farahan, Mercedes "MJ" Javid, Golnesa "GG" Gharachedaghi,  Asa Soltan Rahmati,  Mike Shouhed,  and Lilly Ghalichi leave a lot to be desired. To say the least. Yes, this is reality TV, but this particular group (minus Lilly) has prided themselves on being real friends long before they invited Bravo's cameras into their lives. You can call me crazy but I don't see much to be proud of on Shahs of Sunset these days.

To open the show, MJ boasts, "There's a reason why Reza and I are as tight as we are – we just fit. We belong together."  Blah. I still cannot believe MJ let Reza back into her life so easily. 

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Last night on Vanderpump Rules everyone was obsessed with cheating that wasn't going on. 

Things begin with Jax Taylor remembering that he probably would trade Stassi Schroeder in for another psycho. He's modeling for Kitson – male mooodleing is such chaaaaallenging work – especially when you have a famewhore girl model telling you how hot you look.

Actually what really happened is that she saw Jax's tat for Stassi and realized "easy mark" I could swoop in and have sex with this guy and he'd leave Psychossi for me in a heartbeat and then I'd get to be on TeeVee. ME! 

Despite wanting Stassi back, Jax is a little vague about whether or not he's in a relationship. I mean I guess it's hard to explain that you let some girl carry your balls around in a pseudo designer bag and then you go vacuum her apartment every single time she gives them a squeeze. I mean the average stranger might not understand the deep and beautiful nature of their love. 

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love hip hop saigon erica

It was another drama fueled evening on last night's Love & Hip Hop. The men showed what true class acts they are with Saigon being physically restrained from going after his child's mother and Peter Gunz vowing to do whatever it takes to make sure he keeps both his wife and his girlfriend in his back pocket. At least Rich Dollaz remains his normal doormat self.  Thank goodness for small favors!

To get out her aggression, Tara Wallace turns to boxing with Yandy Smith at her cousin's gym. Let's hope he doesn't take any Instagrams of the ladies like last season! Tara shares her own Instagram gold mine where she found Amina Buddafly's videos of Peter. Three glasses of wine later and she's cutting up all of his belongings. Three glasses? I would have only needed three sips to wreak havoc on Peter's gross behind. Tara asks Yandy about the management situation with Amina, and she seems to understand that it's just business. If Yandy wants to sign Amina, Tara knows that it is what it is. However, Yandy doesn't want the mess that signing Amina brings, and she assures her friend that Amina will not be a part of her label.

Saigon wants to get to know Erica Jean better since, oh, you know, they have a CHILD together. He takes her on a painting date to learn more about his baby mama on a deeper level. They chat about how great being parents is, and I have to applaud them for remembering their lines because this is the most fake conversation ever. Paging Jane Seymour–these two are poised to be the next spokespeople for Kaye's Open Hearts Collection. Their kiss seems about as forced as their small talk.

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Things that make you go hmmmm… last night's episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Which was an entire hour of bickering and I don't even know what about! Bullying, the paparrazi, Maurico cheating, Kyle Richards and Brandi Glanville having hurt feelings, and finally Lisa Vanderpump's hair. 

"8th grade drama sounds the same 30 years later," Kyle tells Mauricio. You know it! Time for all y'all ladies to take a little Alice In Wonderland pill and grow the EFF up!

Things begin with Brandi and Carlton Gebbia shopping at Trashy Lingerie. Ahem. Brandi and Carlton verbally molest each other and gush about much they love beautiful women in an innuendo-laden crapfest. But neither of them are lesbians or something.

Brandi is buying lingerie for her non-relationship and wants to bury a crystal to evoke new love. How about bury the past? Not talking about your ex constantly might help welcome someone new into your life!

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Last night on Real Housewives of Atlanta things got very serious between Phaedra Parks and Apollo Nida! Apollo has been telling some tales out of school and headmistress caught on to an alleged cheating scandal. I would not cross Miss Parks if I were you, Kenya Moore

Things naturally begin at a sex swing lesson. Kenya (rocking some leggings so tight I swear they had to be surgically removed and coochie crack was as well as booty crack imminent) has all her faux assets on display as she swings upside down. 'Weeeeeee! I'm gone with the wind fabulous!' she's cheering to herself when Kandi Burruss walks in. 

Speaking for the masses, Kandi announces she is over Gone With The Wind Fabulous: "The wind is gone. It's blown away." Amen. Kandi demures participating in sex swinging because she sprained her ankle falling off some heels. The real reason for this meet up is investigative journalism. Kandi wants to know the true nature of Kenya and Apollo's texting. Or was it sexting… 

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preachers myesha

I must say that Preachers of L.A. has grown on me much more than I thought possible. I adore Jay Heazlip and Ron Gibson although only their wives  were featured last night. Wayne Chaney is definitely growing on me. Noel Jones is hilarious…not on purpose, which makes him even more funny. Deitrick Haddon no longer makes me want to change the channel. Clarence McClendon is also, yeah, um… ;)  At least he was on hiatus again. If this were Bravo, I'd classify him as a "friend of the preachers." 

Last night's episode begins with LaVette Gibson doing what she does best…meddling. She has called Jay's wife Christy and Wayne's wife Myesha to join her for lunch so they can impart some last minute advice on Dominique before she weds Dietrick. Of course the ladies don't know about their quickie marriage a few weeks before so they could cohabitate not in sin.  LaVette is sad that she and Ron will have to miss the ceremony due to a trip to Haiti. Dominique wants to know how the women enjoy their husbands outside of the church together. Myesha is quick to "connecting frequently" because she won't say "sex." LaVette likes to experiment with different locales when getting busy. As Dominique notes she's a pastor's wife in the streets but a freak in the sheets.

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Shahs of Sunset is back with a vengeance – so much drama already!

This week picks up exactly were we left off.  Mercedes "MJ" Javid has just informed Lilly Ghalichi that she has no friends on Shahs of Sunset. Season two mean girls, Reza Farahan and Asa Soltan Rahmati, seem desperate to redeem themselves with viewers, and MJ is more than happy to let Lilly know she's overstayed her welcome.

Reza complains about how Lilly acts like she is above the rest of the group – yes, really – and he's proud of MJ for finding her voice.  Wait.  Let me get this straight.  A few months ago, MJ was a sloppy pill popping lying alcoholic, but now she's appropriately reacting to the hate that Lilly spews?  Got it.

Golnesa "GG" Gharachedaghi thinks Lilly's right, in this instance, but she chooses not to speak up. I have a feeling she comes to regret this.

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