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Oh sweet lord Jesus, save us all from these two deplorable famewhores! In the latest travail of Jenelle Evans and the life she can't control (is this girl a Lifetime Movie plot or what?!) she and Courtland Rogers are taking allllll their dirty laundry to the media and twitter cause you know they got nothing else going on. Might I suggest getting a job! It really helps fill-up the day. 

First of all, in case you weren't aware Courtland was in the hospital on suicide watch, claiming he couldn't deal with Jenelle leaving him. He has since found that "no girl is worth taking your own life."  

The Teen Mom 2 star was fine with his hospitalization, because "a source" ran to RadarOnline claiming she was afraid of her ex. 

Jenelle is terrified that Courtland is going to come after her when he gets out,” the source reveals. “She knows he wants to talk to her and probably see her, and he knows where she is usually so she’s afraid that he is going to do something stupid and confront her in person.” 

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It's that special time of the season we've been waiting on for what seems like eons…the season finale of Teen Mom 2.  Last night, the girls and their children/parents/boyfriends/users sat down for a two hour chit chat with MTV's resident "therapist" Dr. Drew Pinsky.  Wait…what's that you say?  It wasn't the season finale?  Mid-season finale?  What the–?  I have never heard of such a thing.  You know what this means, right?

Let me break it down for you.  Remember how last week everything wrapped up ever so nicely in the calmest ninety minutes in the show's history?  Jenelle Evans and mom Barbara seemed to be mending their relationship.  Leah Messer Simms Calvert Insert Next Husband's Name Here realized she needed to move on from Corey now that she's pregnant with her new fiance's baby.  Kailyn Lowry began a new romance and was working to co-parent with Jo, and Chelsea Houska finally passed her GED.  Things were in a good place.  

Of course, leave it to MTV to make sure the true finale will be total chaos.  Next week the insanity of broken relationships, drug abuse, and violence spirals out of control when we are treated to the midseason premiere.  I can't keep up, so let's just focus on last night's drama, shall we?  Take it away, Dr. Drew

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When you're Jenelle Evans there is never a dull moment. Which is probably a bad thing! In the latest travail of the Teen Mom 2 star's life it looks like her divorce will faaar outlast her marriage. She's on Kim Kardashian time apparently!

Jenelle was married for only a couple months before she separated and had six assault charges filed against husband Courtland Rogers and moved back in with ex-fiance (whom she also accused of assault!) Gary Head

Jenelle's overworked attorney reveals, however, that unfortunately while marriage came easy, divorce will not! “North Carolina requires a one year separation period before she’s even elligible to be divorced,” Jenelle’s lawyer, Dustin R. T. Sullivan, shares with HollywoodLife.com. BWHAHAHA!

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So, we are in the midst of what may be the longest stint of Teen Mom 2 in the history of the world.  Last night's "mid-season finale" was even ninety minutes long…because it takes a long time to bid farewell to Jenelle Evans, Leah Messer Calvert, Chelsea Houska, and Kailyn Lowry.  Not that they will be gone for long…we'll be treated to a two-hour reunion special next Monday, and then another twelve episode arc starts the week afterwards.  That's when the true crazy is going to begin!

Last night's episode begins with a phone call from JeremyLeah, shocked she got pregnant so quickly (must I remind her of her first date with Corey?), has yet to tell him the good news.  Jeremy is also in disbelief that it happened so fast, but he's nervous and excited.  Leah commends Jeremy on waiting until he was the ripe old age of twenty-three to have a child…not sixteen like she was.

Chelsea is taking Aubree to check out day cares in the event she passes her GED and gets to start "hair school."  Man, she's even whiny when questioning the day care instructor!  The director calms her fears regarding leaving Aubree for the first time and stresses the need for Aubree to socialize at this age.  Chelsea smacks her gum in agreement.

Kailyn is prepping for Isaac's second birthday and spending a lot of time with Javi.  Why are guys drawn to her blunt sarcasm?  Javi wonders if he'll ever get out of the friend zone.  Kailyn assures him that being invited to Isaac's party is a good sign.  Meanwhile, Jo and his new girlfriend are discussing how well Jo and Kailyn have been co-parenting lately.  They are, however, having separate parties for their son.  Jo wants Kailyn to meet his girlfriend, and his girlfriend thinks that Kailyn would want to know who is hanging around her son.  She offers to write Kailyn a letter to break the ice. 

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Teen Mom 2 star Leah (Messer) Calvert, 20, reportedly gave birth to baby number three early this morning. This is Leah's first child with husband Jeremy Calvert, 24.

Leah gave birth in the early hours of this morning to a beautiful baby girl," a close family friend told In Touch. "Mother and baby are happy and healthy. Leah went into labor late last night, and the baby was born this morning.
 
Leah had twins Ali and Aleeah with her first husband, Corey Simms, in 2009.
 
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Uh-oh is Teen Mom 2's biggest trainwreck about to be the show's undoing? According to a new report 'The Curse of Amber Portwood' may strike again!

With Teen Mom 3 about to roll out and Jenelle Evans unraveling before MTV cameras' very lenses, sources tell E! News that MTV has serious concerns about continuing with the show that broadcasts and publicizes all her chaos to the world. 

MTV famously canceled Teen Mom in part because Amber's life became so out of control that it was damaging the show. And it seems TM2 may suffer a similar fate because of Jenelle's dangerous behaviors. 

Teen Mom 2 is "definitely on its way out," a source close to the network reveals! MTV "is planning to air the fourth season this year and will announce the premiere date soon."

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This Teen Mom 2 trainwreck just keeps chugging along – with Jenelle Evans in the conductor's seat and we're just her passengers, along for the wild ride.

To recap the past few weeks: Jenelle got married, Jenelle got pregnant, Jenelle dumped new hubby, Jenelle filed assault charges against said hubby, and then Jenelle miscarried her baby

This week, Jenelle moved in with old flame (and formerly accused abuser, necklace stealer, and door-kicker-inner) Gary Head, accused Courtland Rogers of trying to run her off the road and Courtland tried to cozy up to Gary's lovely lady.  Just another 48 hours in the life of Jenelle.

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Is it just me, or do these girls get dumber the longer this season of Teen Mom 2 continues?  It's like, they do something stupid, and I'm convinced that they can't top their own stupidity, and then BAM!  The next episode happens, and they've proven me wrong.  Case in point…on last night's episode, Leah Messer Calvert took out her IUD because she wants her kids to be close in age.  Pay no attention to the fact that at this point she's only known Jeremy for two months.  Jenelle Evans admits she slept with her best friend's boyfriend around the time she got pregnant, so she doesn't know for certain who Jace's father is.  Chelsea Houska was more concerned about Adam's twenty-first birthday than studying for her GED, and Kailyn Lowry brought yet another dude into Isaac's life.  I can't wait to see what they have in store for us next week!

After the twins' birthday party, Leah drops off the twins with Corey.  He's lamenting (well, not really…he's be lamenting if he knew what it meant) about what to get the girls for their birthday since they already have every toy under the sun.  Leah tells him she got them a Barbie jeep before riding off into the sunset for a romantic getaway with Jeremy.  They head up to a cabin in the mountains, and Leah is blown away by the coziness of it all.  Plus, there's a hot tub!  Jeremy sneakily hides what I'm assuming is an engagement ring in a vase in the den.  I'm just glad these crazy kids are taking it slow.

Jo has Isaac for the weekend, and Kailyn has a date with Javi.  I'm getting that Kailyn's favorite restaurant is a diner.  Javi is studying criminal justice in school, and he wants to be a cop.  They flirt, eat, and cut to the chase as far as dating, Isaac, and Jo are concerned.  Seriously, what is up with these girls throwing themselves into relationships?  It's a breakfast date, not an interview for a spouse.

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