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MTV has announced which moms from 16 and Pregnant have been cast for a new round of Teen MomTeen Mom 3 will feature Alexandria Sekella, 18, Mackenzie Douthit, 18, Briana DeJesus, 17, and Katie Yeager, 19. 

Alex Sekella lives in Pennsylvania and is the mama to a little girl named Arabella Elizabeth. You'll remember Alex's ex-fiance Matt McCann as being horribly addicted to drugs. Alex hopes her turn on Teen Mom 3 will show how she struggles to work two jobs to raise Arabella on her own. What about Matt? Alex tells In Touch, "I refuse to let him see her."

Mackenzie Douthit is from Oklahoma and has a son named Gannon. Mackenzie is engaged to rodeo addict Josh McKee. About Teen Mom 3, Mackenzie says, "You'll see our good times and our bad times."

“I was scared to do the show [initially],” Mackenzie shares.  “But I can’t look back and change the fact that I got pregnant so all I can do is look towards the future.”

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Apparently, the stars of Teen Mom want to accomplish as much as they can before they're of legal drinking age. One Teen Mom 2 star will have three college degrees babies before 21, one Teen Mom star has undergone three plastic surgeries, and one Teen Mom 2 star has logged three (to the tenth power) acts of volunteerism breakups and reconciliations before 21.

First, Leah (Messer) Calvert announced yesterday that she is pregnant again. According to US Weekly, Leah and Jeremy Calvert's baby will join their family this winter. This is Leah's third pregnancy. Leah suffered a miscarriage earlier this year. In 2009, Leah had twins, Ali and Aleeah, with her first husband, Corey Simms.

Leah confirmed the US Weekly story via facebook and tweeted:

"THANKS SOOO MUCH EVERYONE! #PositiveTweets makes this momma soooo happy!!! @Calvert505 are in such a good place! :) Love all of you!" 

"Being a teen mom was difficult, but I'm older and in a different place now — married to Jeremy and excited for our family to grow," Leah said. "We feel incredibly blessed and look forward to this next chapter in our lives." Oh, Leah, why the rush? You might be "older" but you are still only 20. :(

Next, this week's In Touch cover revealed (more) plastic surgery for a different Teen Mom star.

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Sad news, Teen Mom fans. The whirlwind romance between Jenelle Evans and Courtland Rogers has come to an end. Last week, Jenelle gushed about their "perfect couple" status. "We are moving into our own house and are very happy about this decision," Jenelle boasted. "We get along great. We haven’t argued yet and have been living together for 2 weeks!” 
 
Where did they go wrong? Let me count the ways… Jenelle hasn't said much… yet. It's only a matter of time before she famously over shares the details via Twitter, smoke signals, Sulia, messenger pigeons, Facebook, and her blog. For now, though, Jenelle simply wrote, "I'm single once again. I ended things and didn't think things were working out between me and Courtland. I rather not go into detail why but I'm happy with this decision." 
 
The gossip blogs have started speculating on which ex the Teen Mom 2 star will rebound with – Kieffer Delp or Gary Head. How do you choose between two such upstanding men? First you have Kieffer, who is threatening to release a Jenelle and Kieffer sex tape. On Thursday, Kieffer tweeted, “When this vid comes out shes gonna cwy like the CRYBABY she is." Lovely. Then, there's Gary, the alleged abusive drug addict. Hopefully, Jenelle will take notice of the other (little) man in her life and rebound with (only) him. Note to Janelle: His name is Jace, and he calls you Mommy.
 
The Sad Tales of Teen Moms continue with Amber Portwood and Gary Shirley
 
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Jenelle Evans is in love, y'all. 

Are you still with me? Here goes nothing… on her blog, the Teen Mom 2 star proudly proclaims, “I think I have broken the “Gary/Kieffer” Spell I was under! YES!" Yes, Kieffer Delp and Jenelle are off again. So sad. Just a few days after that shocker expected turn of events, Jenelle declares her love for a new guy, Courtland Rogers

Jenelle shares, "Courtland and myself have made it official that we are in a relationship now. I'm so excited to start this new chapter in my life. Everyone is going to love him. He is so caring, loyal, and knows how to take care of himself. I have a good feeling about this relationship."

Jenelle has a good feeling, y'all.

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MTV aired Amber Behind Bars last night. 

From 16 and Pregnant to Teen Mom… Amber Portwood fell apart right before our eyes. We watched. We screamed. We snarked. We even cried. Well, I know I cried when Leah said to Amber "I need you!" in between sobs and when Amber gave full custody of Leah to Gary Shirley. We sat in stunned silence when Amber chose prison over drug rehab. 

I braced myself for intense feelings of anger and/or sadness, turned on my TV, and listened as Dr. Drew Pinksy interviewed AmberBehind bars. Much to my surprise, I actually found Amber to be likable. Possibly for the first time ever. I also came to respect her decision to enter prison.

Dr. Drew began the interview with, "You're not loaded?!" I giggled and cringed at the same time. "Nope, not loaded, but I feel a little bit nervous," Amber said. 

To recap: Amber has been in prison for four months now. And in therapeutic community, which is like rehab in prison, for two months. Amber admitted she resisted the move into rehab. But they forced her, because she's in prison and doesn't get to make decisions. Dr. Drew asked, "Why prison?"

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I know I can be overly snarky, and I realize that sometimes my sarcasm is too much.  However, I am being dead serious when I say that someone needs to intervene with poor Leah Shirley.  The precious toddler has been the rope that Teen Mom's Amber Portwood and Gary Shirley use to play their crazy game of tug-of-war, and it's so depressing.  I don't doubt they both love their daughter with everything they have, but seriously, this is just too much.

The newest news from this pair stems from a "behind bars" interview that Amber gave to Dr. Drew Pinsky as she serves time for parole violations in an Indiana penitentiary.  I mean, is this man even a real doctor?  I saw a few episodes of "Loveline" back in the day, but should someone who used to pal around with Adam Corolla really be giving advice to incarcerated teenage mothers?  What genius at MTV thought this was a good idea?  These sad people aren't characters or cash cows, but yet…Sorry.  I will step down from my soapbox now. 

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We all said our goodbyes to the original Teen Mom cast a few weeks ago.

Together, we celebrated the girls, Amber Portwood's eyelashes, the babies, Farrah Abraham's never-ending supply of puppies, the good times, Catelynn Lowell's fashion evolution, the bad times, and Bentley pissing on Maci Bookout

Personally, I thought the series finale and Dr. Drew's reunion special (part one and part two) were send off enough. However, despite the inevitable spin offs to come, somebody (starts with a 'm' and rhymes with 'teevee') isn't ready to cut the cord. 

MTV has announced three new Teen Mom specials. Perhaps the most unexpected one, though, is a half-hour interview with Amber titled Amber Behind Bars: An MTV Special set to air on October 9!

MTV's press release:

In this exclusive half-hour interview, Dr. Drew sits down with Amber Portwood inside the Rockville Correctional Facility for an intimate discussion about what life has been like behind bars, the status of her relationship with her daughter Leah, ex-boyfriend Gary, and her family, and her hopes for the future. As Amber reflects on her situation, she gives viewers an open, honest look inside the intense ups and downs she’s faced during this journey.

This exclusive interview marks the first time Amber has personally shared her story since she entered the Rockville Correctional Facility in June 2012.

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Watch out, world!  Farrah Abraham is getting a spin-off!  I know, I know…I probably won't watch it either!  After (finally) saying farewell to the original train wrecks ladies of MTV's Teen Mom, it appears that at least one of them won't be fading into obscurity just yet. 

On the heels of that news, it seems that the only sane couple to come out of this mess will finally be walking down the aisle, as Catelynn Lowell and Tyler Baltierra are finally planning that wedding.  Sadly, they sound just a delusional as their counterparts when it comes to saying "I do."

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