Do you hear it? Wait. For. It. Ah, there it is, Farrah Abraham's desperate cry for fame. So sad.
We can only hope that this former Teen Mom star is on the fast track to stardom perusing the classified ads. But, before she succumbs to the horrors of this foreign thing called JOB, Farrah sits down with Dr. Phil to discuss her latest desperate attempts to be relevant again.
Farrah shares why she chose to appear on16 and Pregnant, saying, "My ultimate goal, at that time, was to show a struggle, and no matter what, any teen who is pregnant can get through it." Of course, 16 and Pregnant led to Teen Mom, and Farrah goes on to say that being a reality TV star helped her to "step up as a business woman."
Step up, indeed! While Farrah has dabbled in many ventures since Teen Mom, she recently took her first stab at filmmaking. A film of the naughty variety. Details, smetails, Farrah loves to tell tall tales.
Geez. Can't a girl orchestrate her own sex tape scandal in peace?
Not if you're Farrah Abraham, apparently, as she's been dealt yet another blow. Um. No pun intended.
Last week, Farrah's mentally sane mother, Debra, insisted that her daughter would never take part in a "things like that" because she's a good Christian girl. HAHA. The truth came out, of course, and Debra is not taking it well. According to inside sources, Debra and Farrah have been fighting non-stop since James Deen blew up Farrah's game, and now Farrah is outta there!
It's unclear whether Debra kicked Farrah out of the house or Farrah made the decision on her own; however, the Teen Mom star was seen yesterday moving out her belongings.
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Although, unlike her peers, Kail's book focuses on her life before she became a teen mom. About the book, Kail tweeted, "Not so much about being a teen mom – more about living with an addict & absent father resulting in where I am now."
Oh girls of Teen Mom 2, what are we going to do with you? Last night,Leah Messer Sims Calvert walked down the aisle for a second time in her short life, and Jenelle Evans caused a scene at Jace's third birthday party. Anyone want to chip in for a Mom-of-theYear trophy with me? Chelsea Houska celebrated her twenty-first birthday, and Kailyn Lowry got engaged to Javi and Jo let out a sigh of relief that she was now someone else's problem. Good times, right?
The episode starts with Leah cooking breakfast with her dad, and we learn that she hasn't seen him since she was thirteen. She tells him what a great provider Jeremy is, and he's happy to be back in his daughter's life. I wish he'd turn his NASCAR ballcap around so I could see who his favorite driver is. #rubbinisracin'
Chelsea is moving yet again (what is this…like the fourth time this season alone?), and she takes Aubree to her mom's after daycare. She's planning for her twenty-first birthday, and her mom offers to watch Aubree so she can celebrate. Aubree's birthday is not long after Chelsea's, and Chelsea's mom asks if A-D-A-M will be attending her party. Chelsea turns on the whine and says she doesn't want to talk about him under any circumstances. Her mom praises her maturity.
Back with Kieffer, Jenelle is stressed out because her roommate is moving out, and she's short on cash from her boyfriend's mooching ways because her Internet job isn't paying as much as she'd hoped. She heads to her mom's house to discuss Jace's upcoming third birthday. Wait, my bad…she really just wants to complain to Barbara about her roommate and collect her mail. She reveals to her mom that she's dropped out of school due to the stress from her legal troubles with Gary and her boob job…both good reasons. Jenelle can barely keep her eyes open as she tells her mom that Kieffer is moving in with her. Barbara tells her daughter that she's planned Jace's party for the following day at a local tumbling Jim. Jenelle is upset that she didn't get more time to invite her friends, but she warns her mom she will be bringing Kieffer.
This time, however, it's Michael Abraham, Farrah's father, and James Deen, Farrah's penis for hire, who have a few things to say about her botched up attempt to orchestrate her own sex tape scandal the sex tape.
When it comes to Farrah's family, it's safe to say, the family that prays together stays delusional together.
First, Farrah's mother Debra Danielson said her good Christian girl would never participate in a sex tape. Then, once Farrah acknowledged the tape's existence, the former Teen Mom star claimed she made it for her personal scrapbook only. In the next breath, however, she started the bids for said tape at $2 million. Now, Farrah's father Michael has gone on record, referring to James as "abusive" and an "opportunist."
After enduring weeks of unwanted attention, confrontations with know-it-all Twitter freaks fans, and tabloid speculation, Taylor Halbur has confirmed that she and Teen Mom 2 baby daddy Adam Lind are expecting a baby of their own this August.
Why one would submit to sexy times with Adam is beyond my comprehension. I mean, he's no Ryan Edwards in the looks department, and he treats Chelsea Houska – and their three-year-old daughter Aubree – worse than yesterday's trash. Anyone else remember his "little bastard" comment? I rest my case.
Anyway, in a recent interview, Taylorconfirmed the pregnancy, addressed Adam's less than stellar reputation, and revealed their current relationship status.
"I decided not to [previously] confirm the pregnancy for a few reasons," Taylor said. "First of all, I didn't want to put my family in the middle of all the chaos it would make. Also, Adam and I decided that we didn't want to make it public for the sake of our child. We knew there would be a lot of backlash from the viewers of the show."
First up, and most importantly, Farrah herself is finally confirming the news, so we don't have to continue speculating along with her parents (ew) as some nekkid movie star wannabe gives the world sound bites on his experience with the reality star. James Deen has been all over the tabloids talking about his romp with Farrah. Apparently, the plot is thickening as Farrah reportedly worked with an adult entertainment production company to film the video in hope of later passing it off as a leaked sex tape. Oh Farrah, you'll never be as business savvy as Kris Jenner when it comes to famewhoring!
Another day, another court hearing which involves Teen Mom 2's favorite wild child. This time around Jenelle Evans wasn't the one facing the judge. She was there to watch her on-again-off-again husband Courtland Rogers as he faced the four assault charges and two battery charges that Jenelle filed against him in January.
After Jenelle and Courtland's quickie marriage and pregnancy announcement, the couple's relationship went drastically downhill with allegations of abuse and infidelity and drugs. Sadly, Jenelle suffered a miscarriage after the assault claims. Somehow, though, those crazy kids are still trying to make it work. Good for them, right?