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The second half of Season 5 of Teen Mom 2 has a premiere date, ya'll!  July 16th will be the return of Jenelle Evans, Kailyn Lowry, Leah Calvert and Chelsea Houska, as well as their kids, baby daddies, new husbands, parents, and other side-kicks. 

It's a little odd that MTV is calling this season 5 since the "first half" of this season has been over for a while and even had the reunion/catch up specials, too.  For me, that means the season is over and we're on to season 6. I digress. 

MTV released a new teaser trailer for the season 5 (and a half) premiere and it's just as we've come to expect – loaded with drama.  Jenelle is battling with mama Barbara, who looks like she's had up to her eyeballs with Jenelle's non-parenting of Jace.  Kailyn's son Isaac will be the voice of reason this time around, telling his mom to stop yelling.  Things are looking rough for Jeremy and Leah and Leah cries about mounting medical bills (despite Jeremy making $5,000 a week not including their Teen Mom money…) and Chelsea battles with loser-for-life Adam Lind, who is dealing with another DUI and facing two years in jail/prison. 

Farrah Abraham

Seriously does former Teen Mom Farrah Abraham think before she opens her mouth? Or does she think if she does not contact the paps or the tabloids herself, then no one will find out what she is doing when a camera is not pointed in her direction?

So we will get to the juiciest Farrah news first. There is a rumor floating around Hollywood — and reported by Crazy Days and Nights in their Blind Items Revealed section — that Farrah Abraham has allegedly gone from porn star to prostitute.

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leah calvert cosmetology school

Leah Calvert is finally getting a job! And she's making some serious changes in her life. 

The Teen Mom 2 star has decided to redirect her efforts from having babies to going to cosmetology school. I'm not sure if, given Leah's own hair, that was advisable but I'm sure someone will hire her! 

Anyway, since change is in the air for Mrs. Calvert, Leah has chopped her technicolor Barbie locks into well, frankly – she resembles another reality TV mom from hell, Kate Gosselin! You remember 'The Kate'! Seriously it's interesting. 

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Farrah Abraham Celebrity Sex Tape Book Cover

Another day… another head scratching interview with Farrah Abraham

Today, Farrah tells us why she outshines all other porn stars, forgets a major detail about the main character in her erotic trilogy, and gives us a glimpse of what to expect from book one, Celebrity Sex Tape: In The Making

Farrah hates being called a porn star – poor thing – so she feels the need to explain to us regular folk the difference between a sex tape and a porn. "I think people purposely don't know how to separate a celebrity sex tape and a regular porn. I mean, I have wonderful friends who are in the adult industry. They make porn for a living – that is what they always do. Like, payment is different. Like, living your life is different. Taking care of yourself. Everything is different."

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Jenelle Evans Courtland Rogers divorced

Jenelle Evans and Courtland Rogers are finally divorced. The Teen Mom 2 star took to Twitter to share her excitement with her fans:

Jenelle Evans divorced

Jenelle appeared in court yesterday - but Courtland, who pretends to be a badass on Twitter, did not because there's a warrant out for his arrest. 

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Farrah Abraham Vivid Cabaret LA Launch Grand Opening Party

Farrah Abraham took some time out from her Celebrity Sex Tape press tour to bash her Teen Mom co-stars, Catelynn Lowell, Maci Bookout, and Amber Portwood. As we all know, Farrah think she's perfect, and the word humble is not in her dictionary. Just kidding – one peek at her portfolio of literacy tells us she doesn't even own a dictionary. 

Speaking to Starcasm, Farrah said she can't bear to follow her former co-stars, "I wish them all the best – but it does make me very sad to still see them make poor choices." Seriously? Because a DUI and a PORN are great choices?!? 

"I can't even tell you – if I had to go through all the same struggles again that I had to deal with the first time with Sophia – and I did not like that and I knew better – it would crush me," added Farrah. Um, what? Can I buy a vowel? "So I'm very sad the other Teen Moms don't take that as seriously as they should." 

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Farrah Abraham

So, I think we can all agree that nothing says Happy Friday to my Reality Tea friends like a Farrah Abraham post with a huge close-up picture, right?

The Couples Therapy singleton gave two in-depth interviews recently, one to Starcasm and one to THZ, but I pulled only the best quotes from each to spare you repetition. Not to mention a Farrah induced coma. 

Farrah celebrated her 23rd birthday last week. How does she feel about that? 

"I feel like it is the right age to be, which is good to say, because sometimes I’m like ‘Ugh my life’ and I’m trying to handle everything fame has gotten me," said Farrah. "I’m 23 – and it feels right!" Raise your hand if you're already lost. :)

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Being Dads Teen Mom Special Ryan Edwards

Are you ready for yet another Teen Mom special? If not, get ready, because Being Dad: A Teen Mom Special airs Sunday.

Ryan Edwards, Corey Simms, and Jo Rivera seem to be the focus, as MTV said we will see "Jo and Vee consider marriage, Corey work on co-parenting with Leah while having a wife, and Ryan move out on his own." To what extent Adam Lind, Gary Shirley, and Tyler Baltierra will be featured is unclear.

The mastermind behind Teen Mom Truth (Jenelle Evans) read MTV's caption and surmised that Corey's current wife, Miranda, is jealous of Corey's ex-wife, Leah Calvert. Um, what? Has she seen Miranda? She is gorgeous. Not to mention she carries a gun for a living. Miranda should be leery of Leah's penis flytrap but certainly not jealous.

Being Dad: A Teen Mom Special airs Sunday at 11/10c am & 8/7c pm. The sneak peek below features Jo, Vee, and Isaac

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