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Bachelor

sean-lowe-the-bachelor-st-croix

While the wilderness races in Montana and the polar bear plunges in Canada were a ton of fun, Sean Lowe is looking forward to spending the next week in the beautiful St. Croix. Hopefully, a warmer climate means Tierra LiCausi might make it through one week without catching hypothermia or suffering a similar major medical drama. My luck… Tierra will get attacked by a shark… Sean will give her another pity rose.
 
Our Bachelor and his bachelorettes – Catherine Giudici, Lesley Murphy, AshLee Frazier, Desiree Hartsock, Lindsay Yenter, and Shark Bait – will enjoy three one-on-one dates (no roses) and one three-on-one date (one rose) in St. Croix.
 
Even in paradise Tierra complains within minutes. She isn't happy about the shared sleeping arrangements and rolls a cot into a sitting room, saying, "I'm not about to share some room with girls I don't care for. I'm not friends with girls who like my boyfriends. I think it's just better for me to have my own private space." Later, Lesley quips, "I want to roll away her rollaway into the freaking ocean." Amen. 
 
Now Tierra is whining about how she hasn't had a one-on-one date with Sean even though he's "crazy" about her. News Flash: Sean is crazy about all of the girls! Tierra thinks she should be Sean's highest priority at this point; however, AshLee scores the first date. A bitter Tierra refers to AshLee as a cougar. AshLee is only 32 years old, mind you, and Tierra is obviously an immature 24-year-old bitch.
 
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ali

Are you ready for some MAJOR dirt from one of the former Bachelorettes?  I promise her name doesn't sound like Hey NerdAli Fedotowsky was the franchise's sweetheart, first leaving Jake Pavelka during his season and then finding romance (and then heartbreak) with Roberto Martinez.  Of course, we already know those deets…we want to hear about what goes on behind the scenes.  Ali reveals that she did the hippity dippity on just one of her overnight dates, but she admits it could have happened with more than one guy if one of her favorites hadn't headed back to his girlfriend before her season's end.  She also shares that one former Bachelor (try to guess who before clicking below!) used to take girls into the bathroom on group dates to test the merchandise!  I think you'll also be shocked to hear who she thinks was the victim of a very bad edit.  This is juicy stuff, y'all!

Oh yeah, and then there's Sean Lowe.  I jest…it's just that Ali's chat has some great little nuggets!  ABC has announced a new twist in the realm of Bachelor specials.  Also, Sean dishes why he is choosing abstinence until marriage.  I guess that's a little dirt from Sean.  :)

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the-bachelor-sean-lowe-canada

It's day two of the special two day Bachelor event, and Sean Lowe and his nine bachelorettes – AshLee, Selma, Catherine, Desiree, Daniella, Lesley, Lindsay, Sarah, and Tierra – are in Canada. Day one of the special two day Bachelor event was a complete disaster – mostly thanks to Tierrable Tierra.

While the catty girl drama in Montana left Sean feeling uneasy about this amazing journey to find love, he's hoping to get back on track this week. You keep telling yourself that, Sean, and I'll keep admiring the stunning backdrop that is Canada. Lesley thinks Lake Louise screams romance. I'm pretty sure Lake Louise is actually screaming, "What did I do to deserve this mockery?" 

Chris Harrison announces that there will be one group date, two one-on-one dates, and a rose up for grabs on each date. When the first date card arrives, the girls recap the season thus far, realizing that Catherine, Daniella, and Tierra have yet to have their own dates with Sean. The first date card is addressed to Catherine and reads "let's find our fairy tale ending." 

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jake sean tierra

There is a lot going on in the world of the Bachelor today…past and present.  First up, everyone's favorite pilot turned famewhore Jake Pavelka is discussing his love, the talented Kristin Chenoweth.  I will never, ever understand that situation as long as I live.  She's just so cute, I want to put her in my pocket, but I am certainly questioning her romantic choices of late.

You know who else is questioning his romantic choices (and rightfully so)?  Why, it's current Bachelor Sean Lowe!  Everyone can breathe a sigh of relief, because it appears that even though he keeps picking the atrocious Tierra LiCausa, Sean now recognizes he was clearly hoodwinked…what a cute expression.  Golly, Sean.  And speaking of Tierra, she has to command that attention, right?  Just wait until you see her recent Instagram picture!

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the-bachelor-sean-lowe-lindsay-date

If I never hear Chris Harrison say special two day Bachelor event again… it will be too soon… seriously. Oh, by the way, have you heard about the special two day Bachelor event? It's an exciting and momentous event that serves as a kick off to the bachelorettes "worldwide journey to find love" with Sean Lowe.

This rip-roaring journey begins in Montana… where it's too cold for Sean to be half naked… how am I supposed to take this special two day Bachelor event seriously when Sean is wearing a shirt? I don't think I can. You've been warned.

So, Sean and his bachelorettes are off to Montana, where everyone wears flannel plaid and there will be a one-on-one date, a group date, and a two-on-one date. Sean says, "I'm an outdoorsy type of guy, and I love to get out and camp or canoe, so Montana is definitely going to test some of the women."

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the-bachelor-season-17-sean-lowe-tierra-licausi

Am I the only one who doesn't think Sean Lowe is going to find true love on this season of the Bachelor?  Trick question!  Who actually does find love on this show…unless it's with fame?  I'm looking at you, Maynard!  Of course, we don't watch for the romance or the extremely realistic dating scenarios (who hasn't had a first date that involves a hot air balloon, open mic night at a famous comedy club, followed by swimming with penguins?  Amateurs.), we watch for the drama.

This season, drama is named Tierra LiCausi.  She's quite the competitor, isn't she?  Maybe if these dudes were thinking with their brains instead of, well you know, they wouldn't fall for these crazies, but it happens every single time.  Do the names Courtney Robertson and Vienna Girardi ring a bell (although, let's look at who they were each vying for…)?

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the-bachelor-sean-lowe-selma-alameri

Chris Harrison congratulates the 13 remaining bachelorettes – Tierra, Desiree, Amanda, AshLee, Jackie, Lesley, Catherine, Daniella, Selma, Lindsay, RobynSarah, and Leslie - for surviving an entire three weeks on the Bachelor. Good for them… but, seriously, where's the shirtless wonder

Ah, there he is! Bachelor Sean Lowe goes into this week's dates with "trust" in mind, which totally comes in handy during his first one-on-one date. The date card goes to Selma and reads "let's turn up the heat." Sean's plan is to take the "glamorous girl" out of her element to see how she reacts. Good times. 

Less than impressed by their final destination, Selma says, "I got the limo. I got the jet. And then he took the Iraqi to a desert. I do not do well in the heat. At all. I'm so disappointed." The desert location is Joshua Tree National Park and the activity is rock climbing. The glamor girl complains about this not-so-fabulous date. Despite her fear of heights and heat-induced puffiness, Selma climbs the rock like a champ! She's proud of herself and Sean's impressed. 

Now what? How do they get down? 

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the-bachelor-sean-lowe-lesley-murphy

Oh, Sean Lowe works out? I almost forgot. While glistening with sweat and annoying homely husbands across America, the Bachelor shares, "One week into it, I find myself really digging a lot of women." Only Sean knows which ones but the possibilities include Sarah, Kacie, Desiree, AshLee, Lindsay, Robyn, Jackie, Lesley, Selma, Catherine, Kristy, Leslie, Tierra, Taryn, Daniella, and Amanda. One of these women could (but probably won't) be Sean's future wife. 

Chris Harrison arrives on the scene of the crazy to deliver the first date card. It's addressed to Lesley and reads, "How long will this love last?" Lesley is excited and goes on and on about dreams coming true and taking her relationship with Sean to the next level. 

Sean brings Lesley to the Guinness World Records Museum. Lesley isn't too impressed, saying, "I'm thinking, um, this could be fun, but if I could have picked any place… I really didn't think we'd be coming to the Guinness World Records." Poor Lesley… a waste of a good (albeit way too short) dress is always tragic. 

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