Sweet relief! A certain network realized this week that two hour long episodes of the Jersey Shore weren't holding our attention. Thank you, MTV! Do you know what I realized? It's fun to watch the intro that features the gang circa season one given the amount of plastic surgery the girls have had. I almost don't recognize Jenni "J-Woww" Farley when she talks about ripping guys' heads off after sex! Of course, DJ Pauly Delvecchio looks exactly the same.
Last night begins at the tail-end of the Bamboo brawl. Andre 3000's twin is dressed as "Where's Waldo" and his entire purpose seems to be holding back an overly aggressive Vinny Guadagnino. Roger is scrapping with bouncers and pushes Jenni aside. She quickly throws a drink in his face in an effort to get him to chill. Ronnie Magro-Ortiz is the voice of reason. We all know that's never a good sign! The gang vacates Bamboo, with Roger storming ahead, not listening to anyone who tries to reason with him.
Jenni is wearing some God awful hot pink platform heels, and she seems to be limping. Roger yells at her about getting involved in the fight while his friend tries to calm him. Jenni tries to placate Roger, telling him she knows he didn't recognize her, and she's not mad at him for throwing her down because he clearly didn't mean to do it. His reply? "I knew it was you, and you deserved it." Oh alcohol, bringing couples together for centuries! Jenni and Deana Cortese head back to the house, and Deena is devastated by Roger's behavior. Back at the house, Jenni is worried that she has a broken ankle. Ronnie calls Roger to make sure he's okay and not sitting in jail, and Roger starts yelling about Jenni controlling him and playing the victim.
Admittedly, sometimes I get in my own head about things, which may explain a little bit more about my love of Here Comes Honey Boo Boo. No, this isn't a Honey Boo Boo post because that would be easy. No, this entry focuses on LeAnn Rimes'Twitter battle with a Real Housewives of Beverly Hills'Brandi Glanville fan which led to the country singer suing the fan who is a teacher. Don't get me wrong, LeAnn is three-star cray in my book but this disgruntled fan isn't doing herself any favors by continuing to talk to the press. I have to wonder if either of these ladies realize there are actual and legitimate problems going on in the world. Probably not.
Here's a mini-break down. LeAnn and Brandi's Twitter followers were embroiled in a toxic tweeting war. Fans of each woman were bashing the wannabe celebs and their followers in what can only be described as mean girl bullies hiding behind their lattes and laptops. Do these people not have jobs?
Anyhoo, LeAnn was particularly sensitive to the negative things being said about her. Instead of doing what a normal person of her status would do (ie, deleting her Twitter, because who cares about what the commoners think? OR laughing maniacally while dancing around with millions of dollars, pitying those who have only enough money to afford the Internet with which they are bashing her), she went into the trenches, launching her own attacks. Somehow (I'm still foggy as to how this occurred), she ended up with the phone number of one of her greatest haters. And she called her. I'm assuming LeAnn thought that Kim Smiley getting a phone call from a quasi famous person would immediately render her star-struck, and she's stop hatefully tweeting like a mad woman. Boy, did LeAnn misread that situation.
Not only did Kim not buckle to LeAnn, she recorded their phone call which apparently has the singer going from kind to cursing in a matter of minutes. Again, who (on either side) has the time for this? Blah, blah, blah, and LeAnn is suing Kim for illegally recording her. Our tax dollars at work, ladies and gentlemen.
We resumed last night's Basketball Wives: LA with the altercation at Gloria Govan's going away party. It's every bit as ridiculous and as anticlimactic as it was when it left off last week.
Malaysia Pargo is holding back Draya Michele with the help of Brooke Bailey. After Jackie Christie calls her a "ho" for the fiftieth time, Draya swings. Even Malaysia can't believe how Jackie's acting. Security pulls Jackie away while Laura Govan laughs about Draya trying to hit "auntie." All of the girls find the scene hilarious except for Draya. She's not proud that she let Jackie rile her up like she did. Gloria urges her sister to go check on Jackie since they're "BFFs." Laura does not like working this hard on a friendship!
Jackie asks for Laura's honest opinion, but she won't really listen. According to Jackie, Draya was ugly to her while she was trying to extend the olive branch. Were we watching the same altercation? Jackie claims her soul is hurt. Laura can't help but feel sorry for her. Thankfully, Jackie has found solace in her new biffle Bambi. Poor Bambi doesn't know these women well enough to know she needs to be running as fast as she can in the opposite direction. Bambi feeds Jackie's ego, and Jackie needs a giant groveling apology from Draya to even consider letting her back in her good graces. Jackie threatens to take down Draya if that doesn't happen. This dynamic between Bambi and Jackie seems so phony…at least on Jackie's part.