Real Housewives of New Jersey

Real Housewives of New Jersey recap

Last night on Real Housewives Of New Jersey, we learned that a leopard doesn’t change its spots, even if said leopard changes the way she wears them. Jacqueline Laurita groveled extended the olive branch to see if Teresa Giudice was sincere about washing their hands of bad blood and rebuilding their friendship

Teresa is out of prison, and from this point forward everything must go in a new direction. Say “new direction” fast and it sounds like “nude erection,” which encompassed about 3/4 of the things Teresa learned from “camp.” The other thing was not to be slutty with your your John Hancock. So, yeah, about those leopards and their spots… 

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Michael Rapaport and Melissa Gorga on Watch What Happens Live

Real Housewives of New Jersey star Melissa Gorga and Real Housewives super fan Michael Rapaport are Andy Cohen‘s guests on WWHL tonight.

First, Michael weighs in on current Real Housewives story lines. About Teresa Giudice‘s emotional return, he says, “Great TV. Her hair was fantastic – best hair line in the business.” As for Real Housewives of New Jersey‘s newbies, Siggy Flicker and Dolores Catania, he loves them both. About a post-face lift Siggy showing up in bandages, Michael says, “This woman has balls.” He adds that Dolores is fantastic and has a beautiful family.

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Real Housewives Kids arrests, DUIs, and more trouble.

I feel like there should be some sort of Real Kids spin off show within the Real Housewives franchise, because it seems like a lot of them have inherited a penchant from drama from their reality TV mothers and there others who have taken things even further with legal troubles and other controversies.

The Real Housewives kids have caused a lot of trouble over the years…from DUIs to public hair pulling to domestic violence accusations. There have been plenty of headlines about these reality star kids – thanks to their mothers’ fame – throughout the years.

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Kim DePaola

Well this took longer than I expected! After all, we’re already two episodes into the latest season of Real Housewives of New Jersey and this is the first time we’re hearing from Kim DePaola. Seriously? I expect more from you, Kim!

The infamous Garden State clinger and purveyor of the finest skin tight faux fur fashions has always been full of opinions, and there is certainly no love lost between her and Melissa Gorga. In fact, if possible, Kim despises Melissa even more this season, and she’s not going to keep quiet about it. 

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Dolores Catania on Real Housewives of New Jersey

Dolores Catania has been friends with the Real Housewives of New Jersey cast for many years, so I’m pretty surprised that she was not a part of the show sooner. It makes perfect sense for her to be a cast member since she actually knows everyone very well and it’s very organic for her to be around.

Other than the fact that Dolores knew all of the cast members before joining the show, we don’t know too much about Dolores yet. Thankfully she has opened up about her decision to join the show and her girl Teresa Giudice’s post-prison life.

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Teresa-Giudice-RHONJ

As a Real Housewives of New Jersey super fan, I have been very happy for Teresa Giudice’s post-prison reincarnation and I have been hoping that she really learned a lesson when it comes to her finances and abiding by the law. 

Well, apparently that is not the case because it looks like the queen of New Jersey has even more legal drama to deal with.

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melissa-gorga-teresa-giudice-rhonja

Last night on The Real Housewives of New Jersey we got to witness the Christmas miracle of Teresa Giudice and Melissa Gorga burying the hatchet and leaving the past ugliness behind them. We’re not sure if it’ll last, but we’ll just have to wait and see. We also witnessed a super awkward New Year’s Eve call between Teresa and Jacqueline Laurita, which Teresa says was totally innocent and well-intentioned.

Teresa shared that Christmas Eve with her family was her favorite moment of the episode. “I was so happy to see Joey and Melissa, my niece and nephews, and my parents, who mean so much to me. It felt soooo good to be back with my family again. I felt like I never left.”

Teresa and Melissa

Last night the Christmas spirt came to Real Housewives Of New Jersey, and also a New Year brought a new attitude, and Teresa Giudice was giving out her forgiveness wrapped in tissue-filled boxes and tied with a prison-issued bow. Too bad that forgiveness felt as natural as an ingrown toenail. 

Of course, in the land that Teresa built on fraud and false promises, it is not Jesus’ birthday we’re celebrating, but the day she came back to life by being released from prison. Jacqueline Laurita, who sooooo does not care about Teresa AT ALL, is watching the news coverage with tears in her eyes. Jacqueline apparently needed Dolores Catania and a bouquet of flowers to deal with these emotions. Jacqueline’s tears turned sour at the paparazzi snaps of Teresa being rewarded for surviving prison with a BRAND NEW LEXUS (said in Bob Barker’s voice)! Is there a bumper sticker that says, “Mommy went to prison and all we got was this luxury SUV.”  

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